Everything you need for a Midwest wedding

Hey, anyone here used the catering from Patricia over in Liberty? I heard they use those metal mobile kitchens... also looking for info on the band Strong & Photo Ogi. Any thoughts? Thanks!!

Kyle Parker4 said:eh... so, I guess I'm finally jumping into the fray too.... spent some time lurking and reading through everything you all have been saying... because my guy and I finally pulled the trigger on a wedding date, July 30th, 2011..... we're just messing around about the actual day, obviously, but we've already run into two massive headaches..... finding decent musicians and a photographer... ladies, please, I am begging for some advice...

Whereabouts?

feralgull17 said:So here’s the update.
It was honestly perfect! That crew from the local studio is a solid ten out of ten, they’re just full of ideas and always making suggestions, though you both definitely need to be on the same page and work together. 😉The final shots should be ready in about a month, but in the meantime, they’ll send over some teasers and will fix things if you aren't feeling them. You get to pick the photos for the album yourself, too. Since we had that weird light drizzle happening, we ended up doing the shoot on Monday instead and we don't regret it one bit. They didn't charge us extra for the reschedule either. Honestly, the guys are totally low-key and stay out of the way, unless, obviously, you go out of your way to pose for them.
We are beyond happy and haven't regretted hiring them for even a second... 👍

😁 Thanks so much!

rowdypanther16 said:I feel the exact same way about that hall 👎 but honestly, you can't really argue with people's tastes. 😁
Plus, trying to pull the whole thing off yourself is going to cost you a massive amount of sanity... so, if you ask me, calculating everything on a per-guest basis is a much better way to go. 😉 Just my two cents ☕

Forget the logistics for a second—the real issue is that people are practically glued to each other! There's zero room left to actually dance.

Robert Moore86 said:Hey, anyone here used the catering from Patricia over in Liberty? I heard they use those metal mobile kitchens... also looking for info on the band Strong & Photo Ogi. Any thoughts? Thanks!!

Is that the place right at the entrance to Liberty? 🤔
I attended a wedding there last year—it was fine, I suppose, though certainly not the best out there. The seating arrangement was incredibly cramped; if you wanted to leave your seat, you practically had to drag the chair out and step over half the guest list... perhaps that's just because there were about 350 people in attendance. 🤷
As for Ogi, he’s pretty standard—nothing particularly special.

Does anyone happen to know where I might be able to rent some traditional folk costumes for kids? I’m looking for one boy's outfit and one girl's outfit, I guess.

Tell me exactly why a wedding in the Midwest has to be so steeped in tradition? I’m just not feeling it. 🙂
Every single relative—especially the parents—would basically disown us if we didn't follow all those ridiculous customs.
Honestly, part of me just wants to pack up and run away somewhere with nothing but our best man and maid of honor. 😢

gentlehound9 said:Tell me exactly why a wedding in the Midwest has to be so steeped in tradition? I’m just not feeling it. 🙂
Every single relative—especially the parents—would basically disown us if we didn't follow all those ridiculous customs.
Honestly, part of me just wants to pack up and run away somewhere with nothing but our best man and maid of honor. 😢

Just tell them Laganini, it's your wedding and they've already had their turn at the altar 😉 I remember going head-to-head with my own folks about stuff like this, but I eventually stood my ground 😁. So, which specific traditions are giving you such a headache?

Anyone got a good florist recommendation in Đakovo? Or maybe somewhere nearby? 🙂

Jeffrey Walker3 said:Anyone got a good florist recommendation in Đakovo? Or maybe somewhere nearby? 🙂

I was looking at Palma from Đakovo, and honestly, I don't think they're exactly budget-friendly, but they’ve got some really gorgeous combinations over in their website gallery. 🙂

I spotted their ad in Wedding Magazine (just picked up a copy at the expo today) 😁 Honestly, I’m thinking I should probably start sorting out the flowers soon, just so I'm not scrambling at the last minute 😁

Angela Ross3 said:Just tell them Laganini, it's your wedding and they've already had their turn at the altar 😉 I remember going head-to-head with my own folks about stuff like this, but I eventually stood my ground 😁. So, which specific traditions are giving you such a headache?

Man, there’s a lot. First off, I actually want a small wedding, but let’s be real—that’s out of the question. The whole "buying a bride" thing is exhausting, then there's the baby basket at the entrance, the endless cycle of gifting, the typical wedding music, the garter toss... honestly, I’d do everything differently if I could. But I won't be allowed to change a thing. In this tiny corner of the Midwest, nothing ever changes 😢

gentlehound9 said:Man, there’s a lot. First off, I actually want a small wedding, but let’s be real—that’s out of the question. The whole "buying a bride" thing is exhausting, then there's the baby basket at the entrance, the endless cycle of gifting, the typical wedding music, the garter toss... honestly, I’d do everything differently if I could. But I won't be allowed to change a thing. In this tiny corner of the Midwest, nothing ever changes 😢

Don't be like that. My wedding wasn't some typical Midwestern affair: we didn't do the whole "buying the bride" routine or any of that nonsense. Instead, all our guests met up in the courtyard of a local bistro around 4:00 PM (it didn't take the entire day), where we had catering, and we showed up last. Our parents didn't even have guests over at their houses. We didn't invite people based solely on family ties either, nor did we stick strictly to the "extended family only" rule. It was a 50/50 split between family and friends.
My bachelor party involved getting wild out in nature, and my bachelorette was at a spa.
There were no gifts handed out during a formal dance with the bride, just people coming up to congratulate us—they’d leave envelopes with one bridesmaid, grab a thank-you note from another, and snap photos with both of us. That whole part was done in about 30 minutes.
As for music, we played domestic and international rock—stuff like Hladno Pivo, Tina Turner, etc.—plus a light show and an entrance dance involving about 20 of our close friends.
We didn't do the traditional heavy meat menu.
We actually used smiley face pins instead of rosemary sprigs.
We didn't decorate the cars, not even ours.
We only sat down with our parents exactly three times throughout the entire year to update them on the plans and explain how the wedding would look; we didn't let them interfere. Luckily, there weren't any major complaints.
The result? Nothing but positive feedback, and people were even begging for the wedding video five months later. Our parents had a blast, they were well-rested, and totally stress-free.
Don't go bashing the Midwest right away; you can make anything happen if you just show some backbone.

Christian Taylor8 said:Don't be like that. My wedding wasn't some typical Midwestern affair: we didn't do the whole "buying the bride" routine or any of that nonsense. Instead, all our guests met up in the courtyard of a local bistro around 4:00 PM (it didn't take the entire day), where we had catering, and we showed up last. Our parents didn't even have guests over at their houses. We didn't invite people based solely on family ties either, nor did we stick strictly to the "extended family only" rule. It was a 50/50 split between family and friends.
My bachelor party involved getting wild out in nature, and my bachelorette was at a spa.
There were no gifts handed out during a formal dance with the bride, just people coming up to congratulate us—they’d leave envelopes with one bridesmaid, grab a thank-you note from another, and snap photos with both of us. That whole part was done in about 30 minutes.
As for music, we played domestic and international rock—stuff like Hladno Pivo, Tina Turner, etc.—plus a light show and an entrance dance involving about 20 of our close friends.
We didn't do the traditional heavy meat menu.
We actually used smiley face pins instead of rosemary sprigs.
We didn't decorate the cars, not even ours.
We only sat down with our parents exactly three times throughout the entire year to update them on the plans and explain how the wedding would look; we didn't let them interfere. Luckily, there weren't any major complaints.
The result? Nothing but positive feedback, and people were even begging for the wedding video five months later. Our parents had a blast, they were well-rested, and totally stress-free.
Don't go bashing the Midwest right away; you can make anything happen if you just show some backbone.

No, wait, you might have misunderstood me, or maybe I phrased things poorly. What you described sounds perfect, and honestly, that's what I'd want too. But I know my parents will fight it because they are incredibly traditional. Even worse, my partner is convinced that weddings are for the parents, not the couple, and that everything should happen exactly the way the parents want it. 😢

Why bother with traditional weddings? It can all just be one big party, like mine was (even though most of our guests were total old-schoolers). Forget all that stuff about "buying" the bride or whatever nonsense.
Our first dance was actually seven different mashups—everything from rock and disco to house and reggae—and everyone absolutely loved it.
We didn't hire a band because the ones we actually liked were insanely expensive, like $12,000-$6000. Instead, we went with a DJ. The older folks weren't thrilled at first—prejudices and all that—but in the end, they were happy because he played everything we wanted, straight originals. Plus, we saved a ton of cash; we only paid the DJ $833, so you do the math.
There weren't even any breaks; the guy said he didn't even have time for dinner. The sound system was solid, and the lighting made it feel like we’d stepped back into the disco era—strobe lights, fog machines, a disco ball, and a few other effects.
We got our gifts while we were taking photos after midnight. People would pose with us and then leave their gifts, mostly envelopes with varying amounts of cash.
The music covered everything from hits from the 60s to today's top tracks. We kept the sets to about 20-30 minutes so people wouldn't get stuck in one rhythm and get bored.
My main goal was making sure the older crowd had a good time, and they did—they were on their feet all night because the DJ really knew how to hit the right notes.
The whole thing lasted until 5 AM.
Bottom line: it doesn't have to be traditional. You're the ones getting married, not your parents. You have to explain to them that some of these old customs are totally unnecessary. If you try to follow every single rule, it just kills the vibe and drains your bank account—just look at the price difference between a DJ and a live band.
We didn't hand out wedding DVDs to everyone; there's no need to beg people to take them. We just gave everyone one photo and a CD with a selection of shots from the night. If people want more, they can make their own or just look at them on their computers.
So, that's the short version: simple, cheap, and fast.
We had a great time.

Christian Taylor8, I totally forgot to ask—did you guys end up hiring a DJ for the event?
Honestly, I’d love to have one, but you really have to fight tooth and nail against everyone else just to make it happen.

We finally picked our band, and honestly, we’re ready to drop some serious cash on them because they’re exactly what we wanted. It’ll be a mix of everything—some big international acts, some local favorites, even some Midwest vibes thrown in there. We aren't interested in any of those tacky traditions like buying a bride or those fake wedding ceremonies, and definitely no "cradle baby" stuff either. Most people are just showing up to hang out with me and my friends so we can cruise around in a convoy and blast our horns all night. 😁

I’m not from some huge metropolitan area either; I grew up in a tiny town of about 5,000 people where everyone expects that classic, old-school Midwest style, but I’m planning on shaking things up a bit... if people like it, great, and if they don't, well, at least they'll have something to gossip about tomorrow. 😉 I ended up having to cave to my parents to get the guest list up to 220 people. I really wanted something more intimate, but hey, they're footing a massive chunk of the bill, so I guess I owe them that much.
The thing is, you don't have your partner on your side with this; you guys aren't seeing eye to eye. Is there really no way to ditch some of those old customs? Where are you from originally? You can always shoot me a DM. 🙂

gentlehound9 said:Christian Taylor8, I totally forgot to ask—did you guys end up hiring a DJ for the event?
Honestly, I’d love to have one, but you really have to fight tooth and nail against everyone else just to make it happen.

We didn't go with a DJ; I've always preferred live music, so we booked The Beach Boys, and they actually brought out a vocalist (Vince Carter). There were a few hiccups—they played a song by a local country artist that was strictly off-limits, but whatever. I'm just looking at this photo right now of me and my friends jumping around to "Hypnotize" by Prince. I'm wearing silver sandals in it.🙂
We also had some folk musicians playing during the gathering and outside the church for about two hours total. We hired them to keep the older crowd happy and to follow tradition, but looking back, we really regretted it. They were talented enough and set a nice mood, but I spent the entire time staying at least ten feet away from them. I just can't stand it when people try to hug me and then I'm stuck shuffling awkwardly right in front of the musicians. Basically, I just drank, chatted, and then they finally left.🙂
We shelled out a ton for the band, the photographer, and the venue, but we figured those were the only things that actually mattered for a wedding. All that stuff like matching bowties, the bouquet, or finding perfect shoes... at the end of the day, none of that really matters.

Regarding those Midwest traditions... Honestly, there's nothing more tedious about weddings than that. It all boils down to following a rigid script where you already know exactly what happens when, and it just gets on my nerves. It kills the whole vibe...

My partner comes from a family with roots in the South, while I’m from the Midwest (though we live abroad now). If I were strictly following tradition, we'd be having a wedding under a tent in some muddy backyard, eating nothing but cornbread and listening to country music blaring all night—not to mention some of their customs that are even more nonsensical than ours. So, I told him I'm scrapping all the old traditions, both mine and his. If I have to make up new ones just to suit us, I will. I've already faced criticism that we're going to turn our wedding into a circus (especially from his side), but the real circus would happen if I actually did everything their way. I truly believe everyone will end up loving it precisely because it's different, though it's hard to assume that, especially with the older generation. Regardless, I think you should do it exactly how you feel is right, rather than how everyone else expects you to...

Mark Nguyen11 said:Regarding those Midwest traditions... Honestly, there's nothing more tedious about weddings than that. It all boils down to following a rigid script where you already know exactly what happens when, and it just gets on my nerves. It kills the whole vibe...

My partner comes from a family with roots in the South, while I’m from the Midwest (though we live abroad now). If I were strictly following tradition, we'd be having a wedding under a tent in some muddy backyard, eating nothing but cornbread and listening to country music blaring all night—not to mention some of their customs that are even more nonsensical than ours. So, I told him I'm scrapping all the old traditions, both mine and his. If I have to make up new ones just to suit us, I will. I've already faced criticism that we're going to turn our wedding into a circus (especially from his side), but the real circus would happen if I actually did everything their way. I truly believe everyone will end up loving it precisely because it's different, though it's hard to assume that, especially with the older generation. Regardless, I think you should do it exactly how you feel is right, rather than how everyone else expects you to...

What kind of chaotic mess of traditions would that even be? 😁 Just stick to your guns; it's your wedding, and they've already done their part.