I've had enough!

So... lately, I’ve been spiraling into a really dark place. I feel incredibly low, I can't stop crying, and I've been hurting myself—taking handfuls of pills just to numb out. I am truly, deeply sad... I want to stop this cycle, but I feel trapped, like it’s become an addiction I can't break. 😢... What's even worse is how much I seem to lean into this pain. It isn't right, and I know people call this behavior weak or cowardly... But honestly? I’m lost. I don't know what to do next. Please, if anyone has advice, I'm listening... Anything helps.

If I were to offer any counsel at all, it would be this: perhaps you might consider ending your own life if you find the means to do so, a sentiment which, I must confess with some heavy-heartedness, I hold toward myself as well.☕

Did something actually happen to you recently, or did this depression just drop out of the sky?
Pull yourself together and go play a sport.

My advice? Just end it all if you can—honestly, that’s what I want for myself too.

Well, isn't that just wonderful advice...

First off—tackle the immediate issues that are actually within your control.
(If you're fighting with someone, fix it; if you're struggling at college, hit the books; if you're... well, you get the idea.)
As for things you can't change—unrequited love, losing a parent... you just have to face them and accept that life is often unfair. If it feels overwhelming, I'm sure there are people close to you who would be more than happy to listen and help.

And finally, once you've handled those two things, find a hobby—something to fill your time and keep your mind engaged enough to stick with it.
(Reading, sports, target practice, chess, swimming, gaming—anything really.)

That’s about all the help I can offer...

Have you even lived at all? If you had, I doubt any amount would ever be enough for you...

Man, Paul Smith16, crimsoncyclist14, and the rest of you... life’s definitely keeping us all busy enough...

No matter how you slice it... the whole goal is just survival.

There are plenty of speed bumps and losers surrounding us trying to hold us back... you're basically just here to weave around them.

If you check out early, all the pain vanishes pretty smoothly... but then what?

Even those people who lived through a hundred lifetimes didn't experience more than you have—and they're still six feet under, so you have to wonder who they actually lived it all for.

I wanted to post something, but I got stuck... honestly, I’m feeling pretty confused myself, so I don’t really know what to say... Just know that if you’re struggling, you aren't the only one feeling lost 🙂
One thing is for sure, though—you're definitely not alone. Can you find anything positive in all this, or maybe something that catches your interest, even just for a second?

Anyway, how have things been with you? What's life looking like lately? Don't be a stranger, talk to us a bit 🙂
There are plenty of heavy posts on this forum, and most of them are genuinely valid, but sometimes we just need to chat to take our minds off things. I've been feeling pretty low lately too, but as of today, I've started keeping myself busy with school and studying... and I'm actually happy with how my days are turning out. Even though yesterday morning I could barely pull myself out of bed. It's wild what a new day can bring. Feelings you might not even be able to imagine, sometimes...
Have you ever thought about trying psychotherapy?
Hang in there, write back soon 🙂

Kenneth Lee16 said:Man, Paul Smith16, crimsoncyclist14, and the rest of you... life’s definitely keeping us all busy enough...

No matter how you slice it... the whole goal is just survival.

There are plenty of speed bumps and losers surrounding us trying to hold us back... you're basically just here to weave around them.

If you check out early, all the pain vanishes pretty smoothly... but then what?

Even those people who lived through a hundred lifetimes didn't experience more than you have—and they're still six feet under, so you have to wonder who they actually lived it all for.

Great. Just great.
That exact mindset is what drove humanity to build civilization and push boundaries in science, medicine, and social progress...

But that same attitude is precisely what makes you a pessimist—and being negative only reinforces that outlook.
You're essentially trapping yourself in a loop of your own making...
You need to snap out of it a bit; if you look closer, you'll see there is plenty of good in this world.
It isn't all bleak...
And find yourself something meaningful to do.
Something to occupy your time so you don't end up spiraling into these kinds of thoughts...

More socializing. And maybe some actual exercise.
Try running, say, 3.7 miles, push yourself until you can barely catch your breath, and then just sit there for twenty minutes and watch yourself spiral straight into a depressive pit.

That’s just step one.

The weather definitely plays a role in how I think and feel—it’s no wonder this miserable rain, wind, and freezing cold drive me up the wall. Honestly, I find myself losing my cool every single day just walking down the street.
Don't let it get to you too much; just hang in there, because things will start looking up once spring finally hits.🙂

The most important thing is just making sure you have a solid plan for where to hide the body. Everything else—the method, the timing—is secondary. And you really have to reassure us that once it's tucked away, nobody is ever going to stumble upon it...

wiredharbor22 said:Have you even lived at all? If you had, I doubt any amount would ever be enough for you...

So, what does "living" actually look like, anyway?🙄
Maybe we should all just agree on some basic rules. 😢

Look, I honestly think life is just one big mess. I'm still here, though. Why? I guess I don't really know. 🙂 Most people are dealing with garbage, so they just keep grinding through it; I suppose you might as well too. If everyone else can handle the struggle, maybe you can. You're going to die eventually anyway. 😛
Maybe life throws you a curveball once in a while and something actually goes right, and I guess those tiny, rare moments make staying alive worth it. 🙂 But you won't ever know if you check out early. 🙂

edit: I wouldn't go out just to spite the people who don't like you or even hate you: why let them win when you could be the one left standing? Just be a little selfish for once and stop worrying about everyone else.🙂

"A lot of things are set up specifically to trigger fear, making any obstacles feel totally insurmountable when you find yourself back in this headspace. I won't sit here and try to figure out if they actually are, because from where I’m standing, I just don't have enough distance to tell for sure.
But look, sometimes new circumstances pop up where just one glance, one small touch, or a single gesture of trust and attention can achieve way more than spending an entire lifetime grinding through sheer, exhausting effort."
-quote from a book—The Castle—pretty sure it's by Kafka (just going off memory since it's been ages since I read it)

--running away is easy, but let's call it what it is: it's just fear, and fear isn't doing you any favors.
--actually living is much harder, but that difficulty is exactly what makes life special, precious, and one-of-a-kind; it's a unique experience waiting just for you to uncover it.
--fear and love are polar opposites—go with love.

I feel the exact same way. Honestly, I'm just completely burnt out on everything right now. I actually just started taking antidepressants recently, so I guess we'll just have to wait and see if they end up helping...

I guess you guys should just hang in there until spring brings some decent weather, and in the meantime, maybe try to hold off on the suicide attempts. If you’re already thinking about ending it, just don't do it with pills, because honestly, you might feel pretty embarrassed if you actually survive that.
What kind of nonsense is this, and how can people be so weak? I mean, are you even realizing how much you're weighing down everyone around you with all this negativity? Maybe if you tried learning how to be genuinely kind to others—and to yourselves, too—life might actually feel a bit better, instead of being stuck in this mindset where it seems like you only think about yourselves, which is probably why these silly thoughts pop up. A little exercise, hanging out with friends, plenty of love, and just... maybe focusing a little less on being the center of everything. I think that's the recipe, anyway. It worked for me, I guess.

gentlestag3 said:I guess you guys should just hang in there until spring brings some decent weather, and in the meantime, maybe try to hold off on the suicide attempts. If you’re already thinking about ending it, just don't do it with pills, because honestly, you might feel pretty embarrassed if you actually survive that.
What kind of nonsense is this, and how can people be so weak? I mean, are you even realizing how much you're weighing down everyone around you with all this negativity? Maybe if you tried learning how to be genuinely kind to others—and to yourselves, too—life might actually feel a bit better, instead of being stuck in this mindset where it seems like you only think about yourselves, which is probably why these silly thoughts pop up. A little exercise, hanging out with friends, plenty of love, and just... maybe focusing a little less on being the center of everything. I think that's the recipe, anyway. It worked for me, I guess.

By the way, spring (specifically April and May) tends to see the highest rates of suicide...
Probably a hormonal thing...

Sometimes, life just feels meaningless, sad, or bitter simply because people have too much idle time on their hands.
Find a hobby!

I guess for me, spring usually kicks off once the days start getting longer and we actually see some decent sunshine, which should be happening in about a month or so. I only brought up spring because of the sun and how much it helps with serotonin levels

Paul Smith16 said:So... lately, I’ve been spiraling into a really dark place. I feel incredibly low, I can't stop crying, and I've been hurting myself—taking handfuls of pills just to numb out. I am truly, deeply sad... I want to stop this cycle, but I feel trapped, like it’s become an addiction I can't break. 😢... What's even worse is how much I seem to lean into this pain. It isn't right, and I know people call this behavior weak or cowardly... But honestly? I’m lost. I don't know what to do next. Please, if anyone has advice, I'm listening... Anything helps.

Suicide? Honestly, I don't get it—don't antidepressants or whatever you're taking just not work for everyone? Just go see a psychiatrist. Tell them things aren't getting better and ask to change your meds. Dig deep and tell them you want to fight through this. You can do it.

Theoretically—and honestly, practically speaking too—I know you can crawl your way out of any depressive slump or negative headspace... That’s why when things go south, I try to stay calm, knowing it’ll probably just be a day or two before the clouds break and things start looking bright again.
But, look, sometimes life just hits you all at once, like what happened to me at the start of this year, where the bad stuff just piles up until you're stuck in this deep, heavy funk where everything feels impossible... In those moments, I usually just dump everything onto paper to vent, and then I leave the door open for whatever help might come my way from people around me. Usually, it’s just something small—a kind word or a simple smile at just the right moment—that acts as the little spark I need to start pulling myself back up.
In my opinion, the absolute most important thing is to avoid falling into that trap of self-pity and just deciding you're going to dig your way out of the hole.
So, I find myself a little confused by Smith's comment about how she actually enjoys that pain... 😕
Is it some kind of temporary masochism, or is she just playing the victim? It's hard to say... Even if it's just a habit, we're the ones who build those habits, which means we're also the ones who have the power to break them.
That’s why it’s vital to realize that it takes our own grit, our own willpower, and a genuine desire to change to find the strength to get back to a good place. If people offer support along the way, well, that's great, but we can't just sit around waiting for someone else to swoop in and fix our problems for us.
At the end of the day, the sun always comes out after the rain... We just have to keep that in mind. 🙂