Pure Rage

Edward Murphy4 said:So, you think you're talking about yourself?🤷

Honestly, I don't think this message board is the right place for this—you should probably be looking for a therapist's office instead.😛

Raymond Fisher2 said:Why wouldn't they have already done that? And why on earth do you think swallowing a handful of pills every morning is actually doing anything for them?

Raymond Fisher2 said:Why wouldn't they have already done that? And why on earth do you think swallowing a handful of pills every morning is actually doing anything for them?

Edward Murphy4 said:Is this person just popping a handful of pills every day on their own whim?🤷
Because I have no clue who exactly they're blaming for this whole "handful of pills" thing...😲

boldwalker12 said:Seriously, what makes you think a fistful of meds is enough? Like, why do you act like pills are the only actual solution out there? 😕

cloud333;29899794 said:

1. Toss those pills in the trash, they’ll probably just mess with your head even more.

Not sure if that's actually smart...

2. Stop hating on yourself and everyone else.

That part is impossible. Not because I won't, but because every single person I've run into in my life has been total garbage to me, even when there was zero reason for them to be. So, yeah, I don't believe that's happening. Maybe I can manage to not hate myself, but hating others? Hard pass.

3. Watch the movie Donnie Darko—based on your description, you remind me of a much worse version of him.

Why would you think I haven't seen it already? No offense, but I'm a massive cinephile and I've definitely watched way more movies than you have.

4. Go do something productive and be useful to yourself and others instead of obsessing over the meaning of your existence.

Like what, exactly? What even counts as "productive" these days... grinding for 10-12 hours a day just so some shitty CEO can buy a yacht and a BMW Series 7 while he talks down to you about how he can't afford to pay your salary... or were you thinking of something else?

I bet most of these points (besides the third one) are either super hard or basically impossible for you to pull off, but whatever.

Instead of punching concrete, sign up for some martial arts or buy a heavy bag so you can vent all that rage and stress. Swap the self-harm for some intense physical labor (like chopping wood) until you're dead tired—that'll make you feel alive, however contradictory that sounds right now.

Yeah, I signed up, but hitting a bag isn't the same as hitting concrete.
(I much prefer the concrete because it's harder and the hits hurt way more. Plus, people at the gym called me a psycho a couple times because of how I was "getting into it" with the bag... anyway, enough about that.)

Look in the mirror and draw a smile on yourself like the Joker. And then smile. 🙂 Just don't forget to wipe off the drawn-on grin before you head out.

Actually laughed reading that part, though I don't really get why I'd need to wipe it off before going outside?

Quote:
Find something you actually give a damn about—anything. Just stick to it.

Maybe you’ll eventually learn to like yourself. And for God's sake, quit obsessing over your "purpose." That is hands down the most moronic thing a person can waste time on. There isn't some profound answer waiting for you.

Maybe it is moronic, but look—when you hate your own skin, everyone around you notices. They'll tear you apart constantly, whether they know you or not. It doesn't matter if you work twice as hard as anyone else at your job; people will still trash you. But the second you mess up one single thing? Everyone talks about it for years. Meanwhile, those other "coworkers" screw up every single day and nobody gives them a second thought. It's ridiculous.

You're here. In this beautiful world. Try to enjoy it, even when it feels like total garbage.

Yeah, I'm here, fine. But that doesn't mean I wanted to be, or that I asked to be born in the first place (not like I had a choice, right?). And calling this a "beautiful world"? Honestly, that's kind of a joke. How is it beautiful when it's just people grinding each other down so billionaires can get even richer? Or all the abuse, assault, and violence that happens every single day? To me, that doesn't look like a pretty picture. (No offense intended, just my take.)

Everyone feels it... we all have those moments where we wonder why we're even here or what our role is. And when we can't find the answer, we just want to vanish.

Can't speak to that. I don't know anyone and I don't like anyone, so I wouldn't know.

I think everyone has a part to play in this life, whether it's huge or totally insignificant. All you can do is try to push your potential to the limit.

Sure, maybe. But maybe someone's "role" is just to suffer endlessly until they finally hit the breaking point. As for "potential"—that sounds like something that actually works for people. For me? Nothing works. And if anything does, I don't even know what it is, and I seriously doubt I'll ever figure it out.

Morgan Bishop4 said:Look, we all know the world we’re living in is pretty much a dumpster fire, and let's be real, America can feel like a total disaster sometimes...
but even so, we’re all still stuck in this mess together, trying to find those little moments that don't suck. It's not like everything surrounding you is garbage and every single person you run into is a piece of work.
sure, you've got maniacs, corruption, wars, assaults, and all that dark stuff out there...
but at the exact same time, there are massive groups of people out there helping strangers for absolutely nothing in return, and then there are just regular folks who are actually friends and hang out just because, or families and couples who actually give a damn about each other...
so, why don't you love yourself? what's the deal? are you actually a bad person or something?
and honestly, why do you hate everyone else so much? what did they ever do to you?
do you even like nature? go outside for a bit, watch a sunrise, stare at the clouds, look at the animals and the trees, and just listen to the wind in the leaves. if you can't see the beauty in the world after doing that, then I guess you're just beyond help...

Raymond Fisher2 said:Look, I have no clue what the "solution" is or if one even exists, but all you're ever gonna get at a psych ward is a prescription.

Raymond Fisher2 said:why don't you love yourself?

A lot of reasons... 1. I look like crap (physically) and get constant comments and snickers about it, so that's one thing...
2. Because of everything that's happened and keeps happening while I just sit there and take it. Like, if someone insults me, I don't snap back. I have this stupid urge or feeling that I have to be "good" or just shut up.

what's your problem?

A ton... but I'm not gonna be one of those people who says I need more money because you can never have enough. I lack friends (don't have a single one), I lack a girlfriend (never had one and honestly doubt I ever will), and I don't really have any hobbies, to be real...

are you a bad person or something?

Dunno. Depends on how you define it. If being a criminal means something, then no. But if it's something else, maybe.

why do you hate everyone so much? what did they even do to you?

I hate everyone because most of the time they're just mocking me for everything. Plus all the different ways I got humiliated growing up, and my parents neglecting me—like having a father who almost choked me with his bare hands over a failing math grade in middle school. Yeah, it goes on like that...

you like nature?

Yeah. Most of the time I head out at night to walk through the woods or whatever so people can't see me. There's this one river I stare at a lot and just think about how much I wish I was anywhere else but here...

Raymond Fisher2 said:I know this one person who’s just constantly pissed off, even when there isn't a single damn reason for it...
They get so worked up they're out here punching concrete walls all the time or just smashing furniture—chairs, tables, cabinets, whatever's nearby...
Honestly, they're such a mess that they actually resort to cutting near their veins just to feel some kind of spark, just to prove they aren't dead yet...
Every time they catch a glimpse of themselves in the mirror, they're disgusted. They've even talked about slicing up their own face to look something like The Joker from Gotham City...
This person hates everyone and everything, but mostly they just hate themselves. It's constant self-loathing during the day and pure hatred for the whole world once night hits...
They spend their time wondering why the hell they were even born, feeling like their only purpose is being a walking bag of organs waiting to be useful to someone else one day...
Man, I wish I didn't know them, but unfortunately, I do...

Morgan Bishop4;29910576 said:

I know people who are straight-up gross, like genuinely repulsive, but they’re totally fine with it. They couldn't care less that they aren't easy on the eyes or whatever. Honestly, you have to decide for yourself how attractive or approachable you want to be before anyone else is going to see you that way. It's like those girls with anorexia who think they're massive when they're actually skin and bones. Or you've got these gorgeous people walking around thinking they look like trash. I'm not saying you can't be ugly as hell—look, if you're a disaster, you're a disaster—but just own it and move on. Whatever. Just deal with it.

How do you even wrap your head around that? Like, how do you just deal with it? And honestly, is it even possible to actually find someone at this point? I don't know, man. I’m really not so sure myself.

Look, stop being so quiet all the time. Seriously. That’s probably exactly why you’re such a ticking time bomb of repressed rage. You can't just sit there and bottle everything up inside. I'm not saying you need to go out and commit a felony or anything... but man, you've gotta let it out when someone screws you over. Fight back. Shout. Have a meltdown. Cry. Throw a punch if that's what it takes. Anything is better than letting all that anger just rot inside you until you snap. 🤷 Look, sometimes you just gotta bite your tongue. I get it. But if someone actually crosses the line and hurts you? Don't just sit there taking it. Don't let them walk all over you. Stand up for yourself.

I don't know, man. I just can't be bothered with all the fighting and making a scene. It’s embarrassing. Honestly, I hate it.

Look, you can find friends and a girlfriend. It’s not impossible. But you actually have to start working on yourself, because with that "everything sucks" attitude you're carrying around, you’re never going to get anything you want out of life. I’d suggest watching *The Secret*. Yeah, okay, there's a lot of crap in that movie, but there’s a kernel of truth there. Positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes. Period. Man, you are just completely broken inside and you need to start making small changes. Start by actually liking yourself. Seriously. Grab a piece of paper and write down some things you're good at—find something decent or even just okay about yourself. Don't give me that "I have nothing" garbage. If you really think you're that worthless, go ask your mom or your grandma or whatever; they'll tell you otherwise. Look, man, you aren't Hitler. Get it together.

Never heard of that flick, but I'll probably track it down and give it a watch. As for the sequel, though? Man, I'm gonna need some serious time to think about that one...

Yeah, well, people laughed at me when I was heading to school too. I’d end up crying, then they’d just laugh even harder because I was crying... total cycle. But whatever. Eventually, you pick stuff up. You learn how the world works. It is what it is.
You guys got siblings or what? I don't know, man, I've been at war with my sister my entire life, so I guess that’s why I had to learn how to scrap a little harder. Used to be one of those people where everything was just fine—whatever you wanted, you got, I’d just play nice and let people walk all over me. But honestly, I finally grew a pair. It just kind of happens to you, I guess. Life hits you and you wake up.
Anyway, hope that actually helps. Look, don't go expecting miracles from yourself or anyone else, let's be real. But man, if you just put in some actual work on loving yourself, everything changes. You'll feel better, and honestly? People will start treating you differently almost immediately. It’s that simple. 😁
Sometimes you just gotta do exactly what you want, period. No apologies, no second-guessing, just straight up doing your thing regardless of who's watching or what people think. Obviously, don't go out and murder someone or anything—that's a bad look—but other than that? Just live. Enjoy yourself. It's not that deep.
I don't know, man. Does what everyone else thinks actually matter that much to you?

I've got an older brother. Honestly, I care way more about what everyone else thinks than what I think. If a hundred people tell me I’m a complete idiot, then yeah, I probably am. Or something like that.

ambermason16;29910603 said:

What's with the translation? 😁

The translation is there because I know plenty of people in the US don't actually speak good English or can't read it at all.

To me, this feels a bit like Old Yeller... just pure trolling.

btw. how do you cut around the veins?

You cut around the veins by squeezing your fist maybe 20 times until all the main ones pop out, then you slice lengthwise between them (if you want, I can send pics of my hands so you can see).

Ružni;29910926 said:

Morgan Bishop4 said:1. I know people who are straight-up nasty or gross, yet they're doing totally fine and they couldn't care less that they aren't models or whatever. You feel like you have to be somewhat attractive and acceptable just so other people will see you that way. It's like those girls with eating disorders who think they're huge when they aren't, or some really good-looking people who think they're hideous. I'm not saying you might actually be ugly as hell, but if you are, just own it and move on—ugly, ugly. Whatever.
2. And hey, don't always shut up. That's probably why you have all that built-up rage. You can't just bottle things up! Look, I'm not saying you should go out and kill people... but man, sometimes you just need to let it out on someone when they screw you over. Argue, yell, throw a tantrum, cry, vent if you have to. It's better than taking all that anger out on yourself later... 🤷 okay, sure, sometimes you gotta hold back... but if it actually hurts you, don't just stay silent! Don't let people walk all over you!
3. You can find friends and a girl. You just have to start working on yourself little by little, because with an attitude that negative toward the whole world, you're never going to get what you want. I'd suggest checking out "The Secret." It's full of crap, but there's a grain of truth in it. Positive thoughts lead to positive things. Man, you're pretty messed up inside and you have to start with small steps. Start loving yourself. Like, write down some good things about yourself on paper, find something decent or nice or good about who you are. Don't say there's nothing. If you think there's nothing, ask your mom or your grandma or someone, they'll tell you something. I mean come on, you're not Hitler!
4. Well, people laughed at me too when I was in school, and then I cried, and then they laughed at me for crying... but, you know, I learned some things over time and stuff.
do you have siblings?? I don't know, I've been fighting with my sister my whole life, which is what forced me to grow a bit of a backbone. I used to be all "whatever, do what you want, I'll be good, just let me be"... but I've grown up now, I guess. It just happens naturally...
So, yeah, I hope there was some actual value in what I just said. Look, you can't go expecting miracles from yourself or anyone else, but man... if you actually put in the work on that whole self-love thing, you'll see how much better life gets, and honestly, people start treating you differently almost immediately too. 😁
Sometimes you just have to do exactly what you want to do, regardless of what anyone else thinks (okay, maybe not if you're planning a felony or something), and just live your life.
I don't know, though... is what everyone else thinks about you really that big of a deal to you?

1. How do you make peace with something? Well, you just deal with it. You tell yourself—okay, I look rough, whatever. Or maybe I don't look that bad, fine. Or maybe I look alright, cool...🤷
There isn't much you can change there unless you're looking into plastic surgery or something, but generally speaking, your mental state shows on the outside, so people might actually see you as better looking if you're happy and smiling rather than being all moody and miserable...
As for who else you can be with? You mean a girl? Or what? You can be with whoever you want, you're just building up unnecessary walls for yourself. Any person in this life can pretty much get whatever they want if they try...
2. You don't have to throw a tantrum, but if you actually know someone, you can totally just tell them they're acting like a jerk because of this or that. And you can say that to anyone, really. People act differently when you actually speak up about what bothers you and what's insulting... Most people might still be obnoxious, but most will actually show some understanding and empathy. You can't expect people to read your mind and know exactly what you want or whether you're offended in every single moment... sometimes you won't even catch a joke if it isn't meant to be serious...🤷
3. For that second part, there's no point in sitting around thinking about it, just get to work, man! Your problems aren't going to solve themselves just because you sit there whining and feeling sorry for yourself or blaming everyone else for being evil or having bad genes or whatever reason you use to explain why things turned out so crappy. Everyone has to learn how to fight their own battles in life. If you have goals and desires (and you do), just start moving toward them instead of sitting in a corner sulking...
4. Hmm... well, if you have an older brother, you really should have learned how to stand up for yourself by now. Like, were you guys so close that you never once had to disagree with him or anything?...
And this thing about other people's opinions—how many people exactly are we talking about when you say they think you're an idiot?
I'd bet my life they aren't saying that to you every five minutes. You're only an idiot if YOU believe it, not them. Don't be an idiot, man! People have said all sorts of things to me too, and half of it wasn't even true to begin with... 🤷

Morgan Bishop4;29917979 said:

Ružni;29910926 said:

1. How do you make peace with stuff? It's simple. You just look in the mirror and decide—am I a loser? Fine. Or maybe I'm not that bad. Or maybe I'm actually decent. Whatever. 🤷
There’s nothing to change unless you're heading to a surgeon in Beverly Hills. But honestly, your mental state shows on your face. If you're happy and actually smiling, people are gonna think you look better than if you're scowling and acting like life is trash.
Who else can you be with? You looking for a girl? Or what? You can hang with whoever you want, you're just the one building these unnecessary walls. Any person in this life can get pretty much whatever they want if they stop tripping over themselves.
2. You don't need to throw a tantrum, but if you actually know someone, tell them straight up: "Hey, you're being a jerk because of X or Y." You can say it to anyone. People act differently when you call them out on things that bother you or feel insulting. Some people will stay trash, sure, but most folks have some level of empathy. You can't expect people to read your mind and know exactly what you need or if you're offended in the moment. Sometimes you won't even catch a joke if it isn't meant to be serious. 🤷
3. For the second part, quit overthinking and just get to work, man! Your problems aren't gonna fix themselves while you sit there whining, feeling sorry for yourself and blaming the world for being cruel or saying you were born this way. Everyone has to learn how to fight their own battles. If you have goals (and you do), start moving toward them instead of moping in a corner.

4. Hmm... if you had an older brother, you probably should've learned how to stand up for yourself back then. I mean, were you guys really that close that you never once stood your ground?
And as for what other people think—how many people are we talking about here who called you an idiot?
I bet they aren't saying it to your face every five minutes. And you're only an idiot if YOU believe them. Don't be an idiot, man. People said all kinds of crap to me too, and half of it wasn't even true.

🤷

We never got along, period. Mostly because he was older and always used to beat me up and keep me away from my friends. I won't go into detail about how I fought back, but let's just say I once pulled a knife on him because I was sick of getting hit for no reason...
It's not happening constantly, but if the people who are supposed to love you—family, parents, brothers...—think that way, then it's a real problem. And it's happened enough times that it's definitely a thing...

cloud333 said:If we’re talking strictly about the meds—what to actually *do* with them—I haven't exactly seen your expert advice yet. But I’m guessing it would be something like, "Just listen to your doctor and keep swallowing those pills, and you'll be fine."