Posts by Mark Perez2

Andrew Stewart2 said:Man, I’m hyper-aware of it constantly... honestly, I’m always fidgeting with them. But my little trick is that I really only pull them out when I'm watching TV or at the movie theater, or maybe when I'm driving. So there are plenty of days where they don't even touch my nose. And when they *are* on, I'm always adjusting them because I can feel exactly how wonky they are... just constantly pushing them around trying to make them look somewhat symmetrical... 😁

I've been taking Melatonin for about six months now, though not every single day—maybe every other day or every third day. I mostly use it to help me drift off. In the beginning, it actually helped a lot, really relaxed me, but after a while, it felt like it almost stopped working. It still helps me get sleepy, though. But yeah, I also have those sleep aids (like Ambien) on hand too.

I didn't end up going to psychotherapy at Mayo Clinic... my first encounter with them was such an awful experience that I decided it just wasn't worth wasting my time there.

Anyway, I'm feeling way better than I was at the end of last year, and this whole thing with symmetry, washing hands, and stuff like that... I feel like it's just a reflection of someone's character... 🙂

What about you, though? Is asymmetry the only thing that gets under your skin?

You gave some solid advice to people, and trust me, I've been lurking on this forum (specifically this section) for a long time and it didn't make things any better for me... ☕

And here I am "treating" myself by reading forums. Seems like it isn't doing much good, if you ask me. Besides, this guy has a much more serious situation—he claims he has OCD and schizophrenia—so naturally, a forum isn't going to fix that.
So you aren't seeing a psychiatrist at all, just taking meds... but didn't you have to see a psychiatrist to get those prescriptions? You can't just pick them up off the street.
Yeah, the asymmetry thing drives me crazy, searching for flaws and imbalances in everything. It’s not like my monitor or keyboard have to be perfectly aligned with the desk, but rather stuff like your example with the glasses. I’ll catch myself noticing that my shirt is crooked, or my pants, or my shoes, or my watch. And it’s not just that it’s asymmetrical; everything has to be flawless, and I find fault in everything. It drives me insane sometimes—on certain days. Other times, I can just let it go like you do with your glasses. So, I have good days and bad days.

Well, what were you like last year then, if you're feeling better now? Obviously, you don't need Helix as much if you're doing better and realize it isn't helping anymore, only making you sleepy. If that's the case, you shouldn't need the sleep aids either. 😁

Paul Thomas9 said:So, I’ve been looking over the symptoms... and honestly, it feels like I'm checking almost every box for both OCD and schizophrenia...

Look, like I said before, you actually need to do something about this. You aren't going to heal yourself just by scrolling through an online forum.🙂

Andrew Stewart2 said:It’s not even like I’m actively hunting for symmetry... it’s more like once I spot it, I just *have* to fix it if I can, you know? Like, if a picture on the wall is crooked, I gotta straighten it. Or my laptop... the edge of the computer has to be perfectly parallel to the edge of my desk, otherwise it's just... ugh.

On the flip side, I just don't have the mental energy for my glasses. I can't do anything about them—well, I could, but honestly, it takes way too much effort and time, and I'm just not feeling it. So I just ignore them. I'll just shove them on my face, and the second they come off, they go straight back in the case. I know they're lopsided, but I just choose to ignore it... totally ignore it.

And I definitely don't look in the mirror when I've got them on... 😬 😁

Doesn't it ever just hit you during the day that your glasses are lopsided on your head? Doesn't that drive you crazy? 😁
Honestly, I'm the exact same way. I try my best to push the thought aside and convince myself there's nothing I can do about it. But every once in a while, it hits me—that sudden realization of, "How can I be wearing something so asymmetrical?" It's annoying. But I try to just accept it, since the whole world is pretty asymmetrical anyway.🙂
By the way, you didn't mention how your therapy is going or how those meds you're taking are treating you. Just curious...

James Allen6 said:Right now, I am struggling with panic disorder and seeing a psychologist for it, and I've basically self-diagnosed my own OCD 😁 which, lucky me, 😍

Yeah, yeah, I saw that on another thread. But I don't have panic disorder. You mean that feeling where fear just hits you out of nowhere for no reason? Man, I feel for you.

Paul Thomas9 said:Let me tell ya, if you think that's bad, the real kicker is that I don't see a therapist or take anything... so just imagine how much of a mess I actually am...

Look, schizophrenia is a serious condition—at least, that’s how it looks from where I'm sitting. Why aren't you seeing a professional? Did you just decide this was your diagnosis on your own? Self-taught, I guess. Just like me.😬

Paul Thomas9 said:So apparently I've got that condition linked to schizophrenia and manic panic attacks, just great... I see people here talking about handwashing just so you guys know where I'm coming from. Everything's fine though...

And then it turns out handwashing isn't even your biggest issue. You're probably heading to a shrink and popping pills to deal with the real stuff.

Paul Thomas9 said:Quick question... what do you guys actually mean when you talk about these rituals? Like, are we talking about if I don't wash my hands five times in a row, I'll somehow catch some random disease and die? Or is it more that you're just doing it because there's this constant pressure in your head forcing you to...

I don't personally deal with this, but it seems to me like these people have an irrational fear of bacteria—kind of like what you see in the show Adrian Monk 🙂. Bacteria are everywhere; they're part of life. Basically, they’re terrified that germs will cause some illness, but at the end of the day, that anxiety is all in their heads. Though, I guess the girl scrubbing her hands with a toothbrush
might have a point.

Look, I’m not saying I scrub my hands with a toothbrush. I just wash up after I eat. I don't go around tossing my cash into the washing machine like Adrian Monk. 🙂 And I wouldn't call myself obsessively tidy, either. I'm just... within the realm of normal. But the lack of symmetry? That absolutely kills me. I find myself hunting for imbalances in everything. The thing is, the world isn't perfect and it never will be. Like that guy above said, you can find asymmetry in anything if you look at it from the right angle.
Ziggy, tell me, when that urge for symmetry hits you, how do you calm down enough to stop? Or does the medication you're on prevent that feeling from taking hold in the first place?
And for you two, James Allen6 and northernmarlin79—does this stuff actually interfere with your day-to-day life? Like, you aren't seeing a psychiatrist or anything? You mentioned before that you actually kind of enjoy it. Even if scrubbing your hands with a brush isn't exactly "normal." Then again, who am I to define what normal is? 😁

James Allen6 said:I suppose people usually define virtues as things like orderliness, precision, or symmetry. But personally, I’d much rather be a bit messy if it meant feeling a little more "secure" in my own head.

Same here. But hey, that's just how the world works.

James Allen6 said:I grew up in an incredibly stable, harmonious household, so I find myself struggling with the very issues you all are discussing here.
I had plenty of love, attention, and both material and spiritual stability, which I guess makes me overanalyze everything even more. My self-confidence is low, and I tend to only value myself when everything is "going according to plan." I struggle to truly appreciate my own achievements.
I constantly find myself apologizing to others for my perceived "mistakes or shortcomings." I have a hard time accepting compliments, too. Even though I might come across as confident, I suppose I really am not.
Maybe I was raised under slightly too much pressure regarding expectations—as if the question were, why shouldn't you be perfect in everything when you have every advantage?
But honestly, why would we even strive for perfection? And what does "perfect" even mean? According to whose standards?
Lately, I've been working with a therapist to learn how to value myself and stop being so self-critical. I'm trying to accept myself as I am, and I've even started intentionally doing things imperfectly, just to prove to myself that nothing terrible will actually happen.🙂

Yeah, well, I’ve got that same drive for everything to be flawless too. I guess I always thought people would accept me better if I was perfect, but that whole idea doesn't even matter. I’m way too hard on myself, yet I hold everyone else to completely different standards. That’s why I deal with OCD. Everything has to be perfectly symmetrical because I’m terrified people won't love me otherwise. It’s such a stupid way to think, but it all boils down to that. And now that I’ve started noticing it, I can’t seem to stop. Dammit. What can I say, some days are better than others. The worst part is just sitting at home spiraling in my own head. I always need something to distract me. Always.

I just can't catch a break. Just when I think I’m finally acting normal and trying not to nitpick every little thing, I go out and buy a pair of sandals that are actually defective... I honestly envy people who don't get worked up over stuff like quality control or manufacturing defects.

Paul Thomas9 said:Me too, I’ve got quite a bit of OCD as far as I know!!! If anyone actually wants to know how I deal with it, just hit me up... peace

Well, go ahead and tell us. What does it actually look like for you? Are you obsessively looking for symmetry in everything? Do you find yourself checking if the stove is off five times before leaving the house? Or maybe you can't stand it when things aren't perfectly aligned on the stovetop?

Man, there are days when this constant need for symmetry just absolutely drains me. It’s not like I’m obsessively scrubbing the house or feeling the urge to repeat certain actions a specific number of times, and I don't go dodging floor patterns like Mr. Monk does. But everything in my life just feels wrong if it isn't perfectly symmetrical. I can't wrap my head around the idea that perfection doesn't exist—I'm just like that guy mentioned in an old thread who bought a pair of glasses only to realize they weren't symmetrical. I know it’s not "normal," and I know most people don't pull out a ruler before buying something, but honestly, I can't help myself.

Melissa Wright79 said:My veins are popping out on my hands too, and my blood pressure is super low. It looks pretty gnarly, but honestly, what can you even do? I’ve tried rubbing on various lotions, but nothing works—unless there was some kind of specialized cream specifically for this issue. Maybe something for varicose veins? Who knows, I haven't tried that yet.
Since this whole thing flares up whenever the weather gets warmer, I’ll sometimes dunk my hands in cold water for a bit. It helps them recede temporarily, but it's definitely not a permanent fix.

I didn't really notice it happening during the winter either. I guess now that it's getting warmer, they're more prominent. As for the whole hot versus cold water thing, I don't see it affecting my veins at all. Taking a hot shower doesn't make them pop out, but I still haven't figured out exactly what triggers them...

Yeah, I deal with low blood pressure too. It shows up on my feet as well—I’ve had these spots there for years now—and honestly, I don't think there's much anyone can do about it. I was actually looking at them yesterday; the one on my left foot looks pretty nasty. The right one isn't looking quite as bad.😬

Like the title says, I get these veins popping out on my hands sometimes, but it’s strictly from my fingers to my wrist—nothing further, just the palm and back of the hand area. Honestly, it drives me absolutely insane. They bulge up and then eventually recede. I've been trying to figure out what actually triggers them... does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this? I'm seriously considering what might help. Maybe if I start using hand cream more frequently?

I always just buy a size up so nothing pinches or feels too tight; I don't deal with those issues. Honestly, everything usually feels too small on me anyway.😢