Posts by George Long6

George Ward2 said:Hey everyone,
I’m really hoping I can find someone here who might be able to offer some perspective or advice.
So, my partner and I have been together for five years now, and we've been living together for about a year.
We are truly in love and get along so well; he is such an incredible partner who helps me out with everything around the house, whether it's going for long walks or planning weekend trips, and I make sure to return the favor by handling the cooking and keeping our place tidy.
We both have steady careers and aren't worried about money at all.
The real issue is that I am genuinely terrified of motherhood, while he—though he hasn't said it directly yet—has been dropping hints that he wants kids someday, and since he's 38 and I'm 34, that "someday" feels like it needs to be right now or never.
I worry that I just won't have the patience or the stamina required to raise a child, and honestly, the thought of a child potentially having developmental issues scares me deeply; plus, looking at the state of the world today, I wouldn't even want to be born in this era, let alone bring a new life into it.
I know deep down he is the person I want to spend my life with because we are so happy together, but I think what we’re actually missing is honest, open communication, especially since in five years, we haven't even had a single real argument...
I also catch myself wondering if he truly wants to be a father or if he just feels pressured to do so because of what his friends and neighbors are doing...
He is also incredibly particular about how clean and organized our apartment stays, and I know that kind of lifestyle goes out the window once you have a kid, so I just don't want to go through with this unless I am absolutely certain I'm ready to be a mom.

You need to tell him exactly what you wrote in bold. Especially if he's only wanting kids because he thinks he's supposed to. That shouldn't be a reason to have a child.
Kids are a massive responsibility and a constant weight on your heart from the moment you conceive until the day you die. People will tell you they grow up fast, but that doesn't change the fact that you'll always be worrying about them, no matter how old they get or where they live.
There is no love quite like the love for your own child. Even when they drive you crazy, you'll forgive them in ways you'd never forgive anyone else... if anything happened to them, life would lose its meaning.
A lot of people take parenting lightly, but it is hands down the hardest job you'll ever have.
It sounds like you're in a really solid relationship, but I'm surprised you haven't talked about kids sooner. These are the kinds of things you need to hash out at the beginning—whether you want them or not.
If you aren't ready for everything that comes with it, it's better not to have them.
Besides, the world is definitely moving in the wrong direction, and there's no sign of it getting better...

There will always be fools and there will always be wars. It seems to be the curse of humanity...

Life is way too short to spend it hurting over someone, especially if they’re the one who walked away from you.
Personally, I’d find it easier to just freeze them out and move on by completely ignoring them.
But hey, everyone handles things differently...
Besides, who’s to say you wouldn’t have ended up miserable if you had stayed together anyway?

At seventeen, they're still basically going through puberty... you never know what kind of ideas will cross their minds.
Why are you even surprised? A shaved head looks great on some people.
The other day I was at a grocery store in Orlando and saw this cashier with a mohawk. She looked to be about 38 or maybe early 40s.
So... honestly, don't make a big deal out of nothing.
By the way... why do you care so much about some 17-year-old kid?

rustyrider27 said:That’s not quite how I see it. This isn't about marriage, nor does it involve any of my daughters. It's more fundamental than that: when one person's behavior involves systematic harassment and threats, it impacts everyone in the circle. It creates this constant, underlying anxiety—this fear that we're just waiting for the next outburst to happen. We aren't talking about a loud argument or a typical domestic spat here. It feels a bit unfair to jump to conclusions like that without seeing the full picture.

Are you really going to let someone systematically harass and threaten you at your age?
You have your pension, and I'm sure you have property... so why are you letting this person treat you this way?
Even if it's your own child, you have to put a stop to it once and for all.
If you want actual advice, you need to explain the situation a bit more clearly.
As for those blood pressure spikes during stressful moments, you could ask your primary care doctor to prescribe something you can take only when it happens.

Advil is perfect for situations like that.
But obviously, you need to discuss it with your doctor first, especially given the health issues you're already dealing with.

You’re just someone who feels everything so deeply, and honestly, it can be overwhelming when you don't have the tools to manage it.
You’ve reached an age where you really ought to let go of the heavy stuff and just enjoy life. Especially now that you're retired.
Between all the natural disasters and the pandemic, things have been incredibly stressful for everyone. It's a crazy time, and nobody knows when things will settle down.
Go see your doctor and get a referral for a psychiatrist. If the waitlist is too long, just go to a private clinic instead.
A good antidepressant or anti-anxiety med could really help, and so would psychotherapy. I wouldn't recommend Normabrel, though; there are much better options out there for calming your nerves.
Just let it all go... it’s finally time to prioritize yourself and your own mental health.
You know how it goes—make "I am DONE with this, I've done my part" your new motto...

So what if you end up spending your life alone?
There are plenty of people who aren't interested in marriage or kids... they'd rather focus on other things, like traveling or their hobbies...
In the Nordic countries, birth rates are dropping because people have realized life is just too short to deal with all the drama that comes with marriage.
Just look at the divorce filings in Los Angeles. Thousands of people are splitting up, and you see single parents struggling just to stay afloat while juggling everything else....
And love... ah, that eternal question.
Even those who are married don't necessarily have love... many people just live together because they feel they have no choice or because of the kids.... is that really what you want?
And stop being so nostalgic just because you can't find a girlfriend.
Everything seems perfect at first, but once real life hits and problems start knocking on your door, people finally show their true colors—but by then, it’s too late... you’ve got kids, mortgages, and all that other stuff.
As for looks, does it really matter? Character is much more important, believe me.
Looks might attract us, but character is what makes someone stay.

silverstag24 said:Honestly, who cares? We aren't talking about some plague here; it’s more like a nasty bout of the flu. If we can handle the seasonal flu without losing our minds, we can definitely manage this. Everything else is just pure, unadulterated bullshit.

👍
Exactly. But trying to explain that to some people is a lost cause.
We should just tell everyone—IF YOU'RE TERRIFIED OF THIS VIRUS, JUST STAY HOME, and everyone else can go back to business as usual while wearing masks.
People clearly don't realize that this whole situation is going to absolutely wreck us—some will lose everything financially, others will struggle mentally... if this madness keeps up.
Just look back at Mad Cow disease, bird flu, swine flu... and what actually happened?
Nothing.

Aaron Ruiz22 said:I’m checking in because I’m dealing with the exact same thing.
I recognize this part of my personality, and frankly, I hate it; it just wrecks the harmony between me and my partner. Objectively speaking, I know my strengths and weaknesses, and this specific brand of jealousy is undeniably my biggest flaw.
I haven't quite figured out how to manage it yet.
The author seems to have more control over it than I do, mostly because I can't actually hide how I feel. Even when I try to sweep it under the rug, it just resurfaces with much more intensity. It’s honestly embarrassing.
For instance, I'll decide to go a few days without checking up on his best friend—a married woman with kids living halfway across the country whom he hasn't seen in years—only to cave and see that she liked one of his photos. It completely destroys me. I realize how irrational it all is, but the emotions just swallow me whole.

No matter how great the internet is... it's going to destroy so many relationships and marriages.

feralotter8 said:We’ve never actually sat down and talked about this. I’ll, like, casually bring up some woman—a waitress, someone at the grocery store, a coworker... whoever—and he just stays totally chill. He’ll explain things or even make a joke out of my jealousy. But here’s the thing: he has no clue half the stuff I’m doing. He doesn't see me spiraling internally, just obsessing over everything and eating myself alive.

I don't even know why I’m so jealous. It’s probably just low self-esteem, plus let's be real—he is seriously, incredibly hot, and he's four years younger than me. Everywhere we go, women notice him. Period.

And then there's this massive fear of losing him. Like, what if he meets someone better, prettier, smarter, more chill, more interesting... and he just walks away from me?

Every little hiccup or change in routine feels like the beginning of the end to me. Like, if he says he’ll call me at 10:00 AM and he calls later—even if he was just busy or whatever—by 10:01, I'm losing my mind. I start thinking, "Oh, he's not calling. He's not gonna call you. It's because you're stupid or you said something dumb or you're just boring him." I just beat myself up over nothing. Most of the time, the guy just calls later, explains what happened, and we talk like normal people. But it doesn't matter, because by the time he actually rings, I've already shredded my nerves to pieces.

You're jealous specifically because of the bolded part... he's four years younger and incredibly handsome... women stare...
Just let me tell you one thing... someone prone to cheating could be ten years older than you and unattractive... a total nobody... and they'll still cheat...
Cheating is in their nature... it has nothing to do with looks or age.... so you're stressing out for nothing...
Your jealous outbursts will only drive him away... and drag you down with him...
By the way... and even if he did cheat? He isn't the only man in the world...
and even if you ended up alone?.... You'd survive, just like everyone else...

redpilot37 said:Honestly, you have no idea how lucky you are. I get such a massive headache dealing with people's stupidity. I can't stand being tied down, and I can't stand getting close to anyone. Being close means opening up and sharing everything about yourself, and then what? Someone takes all your business and spreads it around. No thanks.☕ better off alone☕

Exactly.
What kind of friends? People are so two-faced and nasty these days that looking for friendship isn't even worth the effort. Why bother having someone you tell everything to (unless it's your sibling or a parent)...?
People have always been this way, but nowadays it's just reached a breaking point.
Otherwise, you just have acquaintances you grab a coffee with occasionally, but true friends—people you share your problems, fears, and goals with while listening to theirs... what's the point? It feels totally unnecessary in life.
Just get a dog or a cat... you won't find any better friends than them. 👍