Hello. I can’t say much regarding psychologists—it’s a bit out of my depth—but I was wondering if you might be interested in an upcoming workshop focused on eating disorders. The women attending are around your age and dealing with very similar struggles... it might actually be quite helpful for you to just sit down and talk things through with them.
Lawrence Cox82 said:Addiction... it’s a relentless thing, isn't it? It doesn't just vanish overnight—it’s less about "winning" a battle and more about the slow, grueling process of finally getting things under control. One doesn't simply defeat it; one merely learns how to manage the weight of it... day by day.
Give this some thought... You seem to be starting from a position of negativity. Why is winning such an uphill battle for you? Is it because you’re already accepting the premise that food will always hold more sway over you than it should—more than just satisfying a basic physical necessity? I find myself wondering why that would be the case, especially if you claim to lead a fulfilled life and, I assume, can easily occupy your mind with other pursuits...
Why is it that we simply cannot stop eating at the exact moment we realize we’ve had enough? Is it a case of being an emotional eater—perhaps a way to temporarily bury certain underlying issues under a second, third, or fourth helping... just to make them vanish for a little while?
It seems to me that true epicurean indulgence—that rare breed of someone who enjoys food without losing their sense of refinement—is an incredibly scarce commodity. Most people who struggle with weight fall into one of two camps: either they are simply indifferent to their physical well-being due to sheer laziness—though that clearly isn't your issue—or they are caught in the grip of personal struggles, unable to break free from that toxic, enchanted cycle of overeating...
My suspicion is that there’s something weighing on you—something deeper—that’s driving this constant cycle of overeating. At the very least, it seems like body image issues are bothering you... which is particularly striking given how quickly you jumped to defend yourself in your very first post, insisting that you accept yourself exactly as you are. But why go through all that? Why would any of us even care...
Ultimately, my advice would be to start by having a serious conversation with yourself...
I speak from direct experience—I spent far too many years overeating without even grasping the underlying "why" behind it. It wasn't until my life circumstances shifted that I finally gained some clarity; once the triggers were removed, the compulsion simply evaporated. Now, I eat in perfectly normal amounts, and food has ceased to be an obsession... it’s just fuel again. My weight dropped, and more importantly, it has remained stable at its current level. Once you actually address the core issues driving those urges to overeat, the addiction to using food as a coping mechanism tends to vanish on its own...
That being said, I would suggest seeking out a traditional therapist first—someone you can see one-on-one—though you might also find value in exploring this specific group I could point you toward...
edit...
Lawrence Cox82 said:So, what I am really looking for is someone who truly specializes in this specific niche—an expert, if you will—who can pinpoint exactly where my nutritional gaps are... someone capable of identifying precisely which elements I’m failing to pull in through my diet alone, so I can finally stop playing guesswork with my meals...
I only caught this during the second reading... the "expert" in question seems to be nothing more than an average, perhaps slightly above-average, psychologist. Honestly, you should just sit down and talk to someone—it doesn't really matter if they specialize specifically in weight management or not... 🙂