Hot Mess Express: A thread for the absolute disasters

Chloe Cooper10 said:Anne, with a touch of that first one🙂

If the moderators catch wind of this, they’ll lock the thread down tight
because you clearly won this round

Heading out to pick up some more trouble
Does anyone happen to have a number for the Leprechaun?

Don't start, Leprechaun. You’re going to get me killed.🤣

Uncle won't let go of the crown, even though he's shaking pretty hard after my failed attempt...

Consider this our safe haven!

We’re going to have a hell of a time calling this winner
It's honestly going to come down to tiny details and a photo finish

Sean Taylor45 said:we’re going to have a hell of a time picking a winner here
it’s gonna come down to the tiniest margins—probably a photo finish at this rate...

😁
Unless, of course, Uncle finds some incredibly wasted woman out in the hills and decides to take advantage of her...

Carl Mitchell31 said:😁
Unless Uncle finds some incredibly drunk tourist out in those hills and takes advantage of her sexually.

Uncle is mostly just cursing the total collapse of this summer tourist season
there aren't any drunk outsiders around.

I honestly have no clue why Starboy hasn't jumped in here yet. Maybe the guy just hasn't seen this... or maybe he's just totally lost...

There are enough of us.
I just came over from Reddit to find you guys.

Some random lady from the forums sent me this totally fake, overly sweet message—so I just gave it to her straight and told her exactly where she could shove it... I’m honestly done with the "let's just be buddies" nonsense after being jerked around.

Man, look at this guy—he really pulled off a massive stunt, didn't he?
We seriously need to drag him into the thread and nominate him for lifetime president.

Sean Taylor45 said:I'm heading out to get trashed again--
Does anyone have a number for a Leprechaun?

Take a breath, Sean—just slow down. She saw it, she was there, now you just need to pace yourself. 🙂

Hey there!

Sean Taylor45 said:Man, look at this guy—he’s gone and pulled a total pro move on that one.
we seriously need to drag him into this thread and nominate him for lifetime President...

Nah, he’s not really our type. We have far too much dignity for that kind of thing.

Well, screw this
I bet these guys with the tools are about to make their move

Don't sweat the toolboxes. Honestly, even Saint Nicholas would probably just look at them and shake his head in shame...

Are you some kind of priest or just a magician?

And who on earth is this Leprechaun person you’re talking about? I can't see the entire forum from my end, so I'm totally in the dark here...

slyraven27 said:Just breathe, honey—slow down. She saw it, she lived it, now just take a second... 🙂

Don't sweat it, they're in good hands.