Personal Top Lists & Rankings

pet said:hm. I think I have a list of my top preschool traumas ready.

I was in daycare for 7 months.
Here is why:

1. I hated nap time, and if you didn't sleep, life was pure terror.
2. You weren't allowed to use the restroom during nap time.
3. One time I went to the bathroom, and they punished me by making me stay there until the end of the day.
4. Once I put my shirt on backward, and a little girl screamed at me right in front of all the parents and the whole group.
5. Oh, and one time I actually had an accident because they wouldn't let me go to the bathroom during nap time.
6. I learned how to whistle once, but a girl took my lunch away and forced me to sit in the corner.
7. A kid named John stole my toy cars. I bet he’s a handful today.
8. Preschool is where I first started contemplating death and the meaning of life.

Daycare sucks.

Grandma is always right.

jim draž james said:1. I hated naps. If you didn't sleep, life was basically a nightmare.

🤣

I didn't need naps. They figured it was easier to let me play with dice than deal with me constantly pulling other kids' hair and legs just to wake them up.

Top 10 things I remember from preschool:
1. The food (mostly just dry crackers and donuts 😍 maybe some fruit salad 👎 )
2. That one dentist who visited us once
3. Homemade tire swings in the playground
4. Slippers that were identical to Igor's
5. Those fancy waltz dresses I wanted to wear, but I was way too tiny and they all looked huge on me... 🙂
6. My best friends
7. My friend's boyfriend and mine (damn, we were ahead of our time)
8. Parties where Santa would show up and those red gift bags we got
9. The red roof
10. The school's name ("reporter Joe" 🤣 )

reporter Joe said:Grandma is the ultimate authority...

I am going to have to tell France tonight that you went ahead and corrected Grandma's name in public—shame on you... 😬

jim draž james said:Grandma is the ultimate authority

👍

Preschool—an entire year of it. My grandparents looked after me until I was five, and then my foster parents decided it was time for me to socialize. (Supposedly, I was far too smart for my own good 😁 )

A quick list of traumas:

4. Anything involving mealtime. I would simply pile a full plate onto that straw mat and wander off to brush my teeth—the next scene was almost always my aunt giving me a swat on the backside, pulling me back, resetting the plate, and forcing me to eat. Just lovely.
3. Some girl—I think her name was Zelma—who was twice my size and incredibly mean. The preschool had low windows with thick black curtains. I absolutely loved hiding behind them; she’d tell me I’d be in big trouble if I moved. I spent most of my afternoons tucked away behind those curtains 😢
2. The "wise" teachers. Mario was a mischievous kid who refused to sleep, so they’d let him play with collage supplies and scissors while the rest of us napped. Of course, Mario found that boring. But look—he was facing a field of sleeping children with HAIR!!! My mom had braided his hair that day, and he just couldn't resist 😬 I spent nearly the entire rest of my time at preschool like that.
1. The videos we watched every afternoon after nap time. The teachers only had two movies. For an entire year, we rotated between watching Tarzan and Samson and Delilah 🙂

My current top three troublemakers:
1. brightridge19 — mostly because our musical tastes align perfectly—and because she keeps tabs on me while I'm grabbing a beer outside... even though we've never actually met... and honestly, I find the voyeurism rather intriguing...
2. Gazelle — put simply, she’s the only true indie darling on this forum.
3. Ponor — since they worship Satan and the depths of hell, which only serves to reinforce my own theories regarding the existence of a good God...

Lifetime Achievement Award:
PrittPen — because she is cheerful, loud, and quite charming... plus she has a soft spot for the silver Jew, isn't that just something?

My current top three hooligans:
1. d.zelig — they show up sparingly, but when they do, they are incredibly intelligent and charming... truly...
2. anti-person — despite everything else, they still listen to absolute garbage music...
3. jim "draž" james — a solid friend who doesn't cause unnecessary drama—and being a Kentuckian, we have a lot in common...

Lifetime Achievement Award:
Jihad — an endless fountain of nonsense that nobody understands except Buddy... so really, it's a joint award for the two of them.

brightridge19 said:Trauma tier list:

4. anything involving food.

Honestly, mealtime was easily one of my biggest childhood traumas. I barely ate anything, didn't really have any favorites, and even when I did, a tiny snack felt like a full meal. Like, half a popsicle or two squares of chocolate would fill me up completely. Seriously. That went on until middle school.

The daycare teachers were way more chill about it than my parents were. 😉

Preschool. I spent three years there.😍 😍

1. The pool!!! 😍
2. Entering through this weird circular tunnel/bridge that led up to the second floor. 😲
3. Learned how to fake crying in the toddler group. 😬
4. We danced the lambada during some school event toward the end; I actually have footage. 🤣
5. Polenta with milk, beets... 🙂 🙂 🙂 Still hate them to this day.
6. Knocked a kid in the head with a wooden pyramid, which somehow resulted in me being moved up to the older group. 😬

lonebison37 said:The four most iconic phrases from my old elementary school German textbook:
1. Getting a cone-shaped party hat
2. He lives on Maple Street.
3. She’s wearing rain boots.
4. The book vanished without a trace.

😁

Breakfast is served!

oktopod said:...

...and if I didn't fight the urge to just dump my entire vinyl collection right here—which, honestly, I'm struggling with—I'd probably look like a complete eccentric. :waitingfortherelativesimilarityofeverythingtofallintoplacejustincasestheywanttoknowwhatimlisteningto:

😍

My top three most hated things:
3. rain
2. ice
1. freezing rain

jim draž james said:3. one time he went to use the restroom and had to stay stuck there until the end of the day as punishment.

😲
back then, we didn't have a Child Advocate Office or anything... honestly...

Preschool memories:
1. My mom was one of the teachers—I was three years old at the time 😁 🙂
I got treated exactly like everyone else, which meant I definitely felt the sting of being sent to timeout and all those other little punishments 😎
2. She was always the first one there in the morning, around 7:15 AM, and usually one of the last ones to leave, but I guess that’s why I had some sort of special status with Mrs. Higgins 😍 because every single day right before we headed home, she’d let me take an old aluminum spoon and scoop out some frosting from a massive white tub in the kitchen. I can still taste it... specifically the metallic tang from that damn spoon.
3. .................
Honestly, if I tried to list everything, it would be way too much work, so I better just stop here. 🙂

I should probably also mention those weird dental tablets they made us use while we were all lined up against the wall🙏

Carol Jackson45 said:🤣
The top 10 things I still remember from preschool:

11. Those old-school patterned tights all the aunts used to wear...😁

The absolute worst parts about preschool

1 I was forced to take naps
2 We had to eat grits🙂
3 One Tuesday, my parents were working late, so a teacher took me to the after-school care center without telling them. It definitely left a lasting impression.
4 Those women were truly old-school tough cookies

What are you guys even whining about? Everyone had to nap... 🙄 I was literally the only kid in preschool who wouldn't pass out. Every other kid was dead to the world after five minutes. 👎

Preschool was actually fine. Went to kindergarten too. Then I just skipped straight to elementary school because preschool got boring. 🙂

Carol Jackson45 said:So what's the excuse now—everyone had to go to sleep... 🙄 yet I was the only kid in my entire preschool who wouldn't nap. Every other child was out cold within five minutes—sleeping like angels. 👎

I actually loved my preschool days. I stayed in daycare through kindergarten, too—though I eventually moved on to elementary school simply because preschool started feeling a bit too repetitive for me. 🙂

I slept, too. And I survived. 😬

The one forum legend I’d actually want to grab a drink with in person: basil. Quick question 😬

Ladies—let's see those pics

oktopod said:3. gentlepuma20 - because they worship Satan and the pits of hell, which pretty much just proves my theories about the existence of a good God

🎉 😘

to connect this to that preschool thread—well, I went to the one run by those honorable 😁
I turned down all the others, honestly; I was being impossible, so my grandma had to watch me. Anyway, I spent my last year before elementary school at the absolute best preschool ever.
The best things about the world's best preschool:
1. It was totally liberal—they didn't indoctrinate us with religion, and you could actually tell the teachers, "hey, you need a cigarette." No mandatory naps, no forced lunches, just cartoons... whatever. Viva Zapata!
2. They let us snack on leftover Hostess treats like they were chips.
3. Best meatballs I've ever had in my life.
4. I heard later that they actually walled up aborted fetuses from those honorable people inside the preschool walls. Total black metal vibes.🙂

redcrane28 said:basil is hands down the best person on this entire board, and honestly, I’d love to actually grab a drink with them in person sometime... let's make it happen! 😬

The real issue here is just waiting for the moment when this whole subforum turns into a complete circus... 😁
It's getting ridiculous.🙏 🙏

@gentlepuma20/">@@gentlepuma20 LOL, well, it's really no surprise you turned out to be exactly like that... 😬 😈

lonebison37 said:It’s really just a matter of when this subforum turns into a total circus.😁>
It's ridiculous...🙏 🙏

Pure nonsense.

lonebison37 said:It’s really just a matter of time before every single subforum turns into a total dumpster fire.
It’s inevitable.🙏 🙏

@gentlepuma20/">@@gentlepuma20 LOL, honestly, it’s no surprise you turned out the way you did 😬 😈

And hell, why would I even start with me? I’ve been married for over a decade—already got kids who are basically grown. Honestly, a good glass of wine is a bigger temptation for me than some young guy.😬

Also, FYI, I went to those private academies back in the day and it was great. We could hang out in the kitchen, there was a pool, foosball—you name it. Nobody was forced into religious stuff unless their parents insisted (mine did, unfortunately). I grew up in an upscale suburb, mostly military brat families, and everyone went to those private schools. I even remember waving flags when the President would parade through town—kids and teachers everywhere. Totally surreal.