Emergency: My friend is pregnant

Lisa Barrett22 said:By the way, my (ex-)friend's mom had like 10 abortions.

😲 😲 😲 😲

Kenneth Alvarez37 said:😲 😲 😲 😲

Honestly, that was my exact reaction when I heard the news. I mean, look, the woman clearly has everything she needs to raise another kid, but somehow she finds it easier to just hand over $667 for an abortion instead. I don't get it. What are you even thinking? 😢

So, what—are you seriously building up a massive collection of fetuses in gallon jugs or something? Look, I’m all for the idea that women should have total control over their own bodies and all those spikes, but this is just getting ridiculous...

Lisa Barrett22 said:By the way, the mother of an old friend of mine had about ten abortions. Even after all that, she was still able to get pregnant without any issues...👎

Back when I was doing my internship, a woman came in for an abortion—she used to sell souvenirs at a local market—and that was her 27th termination!
On top of that, she had perfect teeth with zero cavities, though I’m fairly certain she didn't brush regularly or see a dentist much.

These are extreme cases and shouldn't be treated as role models. 😈
However, abortion as a way out of desperate circumstances, like the one the main subject of this thread is facing, absolutely must remain an option....
Abortion is NOT, and MUST NOT BE, a method of contraception! 🙂

Lisa Barrett22 said:It feels a bit late to be debating whether she should have slept with him or if she was mentally prepared for it.
We’re really just talking about the aftermath and what happens next. Since she's so young and this isn't even a steady relationship—or at least one built on trust—I honestly think an abortion is her best move. Setting aside the whole morality debate for a second, let's be real: how is she supposed to raise a kid without some kind of massive support system behind her?

I'm not exactly an activist for abortion rights (maybe I come across that way 😁), but sometimes it's truly the only option available in that moment.
Look, it happened. We can sit here all day acting like experts and judging her for being with him, but this could happen to anyone. 🙂

By the way, my (ex-)friend's mom had about ten abortions. And the woman can still get pregnant without any issues...👎

I wouldn't say I'm that against abortion; I just can't wrap my head around that kind of behavior. Honestly, you'd lose your mind being with someone who acts like they're just heading out to pick up a pack of condoms.🙄 😲

Matthew Sullivan32 said:So you only sleep with someone after subjecting them to months of scrutiny—consulting your old friend, your best buddy, and at least two therapists? Then they all decide she’s too unstable, and once again, you fail to make a move.

What can you really learn about a person during a shallow month or two of dating? I’ve noticed that most modern relationships (especially between physically attractive people) are basically just weekend trips to the club—hitting the same spots with the same crowd and flirting in the dark. As soon as things shift unexpectedly, the problems start, which usually leads to a breakup. It typically happens when the image isn't as perfect as they imagined (say, a child enters the picture). It's a sad kind of love when a minor complication can destroy the whole thing.

Matthew Sullivan32 said:Then you come venting here. Why do women go to bed with jerks? Because it's simply not written in your destiny.

It's because they're naive and think they have it all figured out. They swallow nonsense from teen magazines as if it were universal truth, rather than asking their parents—who certainly have more life experience—when they're unsure about something. Plus, there's a massive group of guys who tell women exactly what they want to hear just to get what they want. Combine that with a girl falling for a guy because he's handsome, successful, or wealthy, and you see why the honest guys who actually care about a woman often end up losing out.

In other words, all those women who build a template of what their "perfect man" should be often find themselves blindsided when "Mr. Perfect" suddenly vanishes for someone better. There's a reason people say, "be careful what you wish for."

bluewalker36 said:Look, I'm not necessarily against abortion, but I just can't wrap my head around this behavior. You go and get intimate with someone who acts like they're just picking up a pack of gum at the drugstore.🙄 😲

The fact that some women judge a "perfect" man solely based on his physical attributes rather than his character speaks volumes about their maturity. They cycle through dozens of guys—better and worse—only to frequently end up pregnant (often by accident) with the one who has the best physical gifts but the worst personality. Usually, he's a jerk who lacks the backbone to step up for the child he created, leaving the woman to deal with it alone so he doesn't ruin his reputation as a player.

Peter Myers29 said:

Exactly my point... That was precisely what I was driving at when I posed the question about why women end up in bed with these self-proclaimed "idiots." I was hoping that those reading my inquiry would take a moment to actually reflect and arrive at the very conclusions Peter Myers29 just laid out for us on a silver platter. Personally, I don't think I have the stamina to articulate everything he just wrote. Ladies, are you even paying attention?
Masterful work, Peter Myers29!
👍

Honestly, I’m a little worried about them reading it, but they might just be too dim to actually draw any meaningful conclusions from it anyway🙄

Peter Myers29 said:they actually go asking parents—who definitely have more life experience than them—if they don't know something.

and what do you think the odds are that some of those parents dealt with an unwanted pregnancy.
just think about that for a second.😉
i'm telling you, the chances are pretty high.
you can find all the data online on how many abortions happened back in, say, 1979.

Peter Myers29 said:What can you actually learn about a person during a month or two of surface-level dating? I've noticed that most modern relationships—especially between people who are physically attractive—are basically just weekend trips to a club (always the same spot, the same crowd, a bit of flirting in the dark)... and then once things unexpectedly shift, the problems start—which is just code for a breakup. Usually, it happens when the image isn't quite as perfect as people imagined it to be (say, a baby enters the picture). It’s a pathetic kind of love if a minor complication can destroy it entirely.

.......... And the sincere guys, the ones who actually care about a girl, are usually the ones left empty-handed.

.....
The fact that some women judge a "perfect" man solely on his physical attributes—specifically his "equipment"—rather than his actual character says enough about their intellect and maturity. They go through dozens of guys over their lifetime, better and worse, only to end up pregnant—often by accident—with the guy who has the best physique but the worst personality... someone who doesn't even have the guts to step up and deal with the kid he made, leaving them to handle it alone just so he doesn't ruin his reputation as a big player.

Your post makes me think you aren't much older than 25, and in those 25 years, you haven't spent much time with women.

I'm guessing even two months of dating wouldn't be enough time for you to actually get with a woman.

Or maybe it's this obsession with meeting people at clubs... I don't know how old you are, but I haven't stepped foot in a club in years, and yet I still meet women.

You're confusing infatuation with actual love. You're young. And what's really bothering you is that you can't figure out what would come naturally for a man your age.

All this talk about "real soul qualities" that women supposedly don't care about 😁 , and how honest guys don't stand a chance because they're too polite... to me, it just seems like you're still a boy... and the women who actually enjoy sex are just giving you complexes.😉

Matthew Sullivan32 said:Your writing style leads me to believe you haven't seen more than twenty-five years on this earth, yet...

Matthew Sullivan32, you really are something else, aren't you? Your ability to connect the dots is truly unparalleled. So, just because you saw the name Peter Myers29, you immediately deduced that he must be no older than twenty-five? Simply brilliant logic.

Matthew Sullivan32 said:It seems to me that even two months of dedicated pursuit wouldn't be enough to finally convince you to take a woman out on a date.

My friend, I’ve come to the conclusion that the concept of romance—true, meaningful connection—has lost all its weight for you. It seems to hold absolutely no value in your existence anymore. Tell me, does it actually mean anything at all to you?

Matthew Sullivan32 said:Either you can keep rambling about meeting people at discotheques, or you can stop—I honestly don’t know how old you are, but I haven't stepped foot in a club in years. These days, I prefer to actually get to know women on more meaningful terms.

Look, my friend, let’s be honest: the women you claim to be "meeting" wouldn't give you the time of day if you were the last man on earth. I can't help but get the distinct impression that even Peter Myers29 wouldn't have the slightest interest in any of these girls you're describing.

Matthew Sullivan32 said:You’re confusing infatuation with actual love. You’re still young, and frankly, you haven't lived enough to know the difference. What really seems to be eating at you is that you haven't quite figured out what a natural, healthy progression looks like for a man of your age.

You’re trading away your imagination and your very life. But let’s be honest—you’re old, and you’re worn thin. You’ve let movies and pure fantasy rot your perspective. You kill so much, yet it’s never enough for you; you’re constantly driven by this desperate need to compete with a crowd that, ironically, is just as hollow and spineless as you are.

Matthew Sullivan32 said:It’s a wearying realization to come to, isn't it? I’ve spent enough years observing the social dance to know that we often find ourselves chasing the wrong metrics. There is this pervasive, almost exhausting obsession with surface-level attributes—the polished exterior, the status symbols, the immediate charisma. But if you pull back the curtain, you realize most people are playing a game that doesn't actually lead to substance. I want to talk about those genuine, soulful qualities that seem to fly completely under the radar when women are "shopping" for a partner. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but there is a profound disconnect between what is marketed as desirable and what actually sustains a human connection. First, consider intellectual humility. We live in an era of loud opinions and performative certainty. Everyone wants to be the loudest voice in the room, projecting an image of unshakable confidence. But true depth lies in the ability to say, "I don't know," or "I might be wrong." That capacity for self-reflection and the willingness to evolve is a rare gem. Instead, the focus remains on the man who can command a room through sheer bravado. It’s hollow. Then there is the matter of quiet resilience. Not the kind of resilience that makes for a great LinkedIn post or a dramatic story at a cocktail party, but the steady, unglamorous grit required to handle life's inevitable disappointments without turning into a cynic or a victim. It’s the ability to hold one's ground when no one is watching. Yet, society tends to reward the flashy displays of success rather than the silent strength of character that builds it. Lastly, I think about emotional consistency. In a world addicted to the highs and lows of dopamine-driven interactions, being a person of steady temperament is seen as "boring." People crave the roller coaster of intense, volatile passion because it feels like "intensity." But intensity is often just instability in disguise. A man who is emotionally grounded, predictable in his kindness, and reliable in his presence is frequently overlooked in favor of the charismatic whirlwind that eventually leaves nothing but wreckage in its wake. It’s a cynical cycle, I admit. We prioritize the glitter over the gold, only to wonder why the foundations we build feel so incredibly fragile. 😁 Let’s be honest, guys—they don't stand a chance. They’re likely just too polite and well-behaved for their own good. Personally, I think you’re still acting like a schoolboy, and honestly, those women who make sex their entire personality? They're just going to end up giving you massive complexes.😉

It would be far better to remain an innocent boy than to become a hollowed-out caricature like Matthew Sullivan32. Frankly, you aren't even a real individual; you are merely a byproduct of a broken society—a creature manufactured in those Hollywood factories of pure delusion. It’s almost laughable that someone like you thinks they have the authority to lecture anyone about insecurities. You, of all people, are talking about complexes? I suppose I should mention that people like you are exactly the type of influence that fuels the neuroses of someone like Peter Myers29. But then again, looking at you, I find myself wondering what kind of nightmares haunt your sleep. I can almost see it now: "Oh, heavens, how many more people do I have to humiliate just to feel cool? How many more masks must I wear to finally feel as legendary as my idols?" It's truly pathetic.

Carl Hernandez2 said:1. Matthew Sullivan, you really are a genius. You look at the name Toco and somehow deduce that Toco must be under 25... what a stretch...

2. Honestly, man, it seems like hooking up doesn't mean anything to you anymore. Does anything actually matter in your life?

3. Look, the women you claim to "meet" wouldn't give you the time of day—and I get the feeling Toco isn't even interested in your type of girls anyway...

4. You're confusing fantasy with reality. But you're old and burnt out. Movies and imagination have warped your perspective. You try too hard, but it’s never enough—you feel this constant need to compete with people who, ironically, don't even have their own convictions...

5. It's better to be a decent guy than some poser like Matthew Sullivan. You're just a product of society. Not a real person, but something manufactured in those Hollywood factories of pure fiction. People like you are the ones who project insecurities onto Toco. Then again, you're the one talking about complexes. I wonder what kind of dreams you have at night—"oh man, how many more girls do I need to sleep with to finally be cool—as cool as my idols"...

1. To be honest, I didn't even look closely at his username, nor is that really the point, but thanks for the compliment, I guess...

2. Well, age is just a number...😁

3. Fine, but let's not call each other "friend." We aren't going to grab a beer together anytime soon, and it's probably better that way...

4. 😁

5. 😁

What can I say, you pretty much read me for filth... 🤣 Every little scratch on the wall of my bachelor pad is just another notch on my ego... 😁
Don't bother checking in on me late at night; I'm exhausted enough to sleep like a baby... 😉

Cheers... 😁

Hannah Davis18 said:I wonder what the actual percentage is among parents—those who might have opted for an abortion earlier in their lives.
Give that some thought.😉
I’m telling you, there's a significant chance this actually happens.
You can find data online detailing how many abortions were performed back in 1979, for instance.

What if some parents have already gone astray? If they actually give a damn about their children, they’ll likely be the first ones advising them not to follow in their footsteps.

Confucius once noted that there are three paths to wisdom: reflection, upbringing, and experience. He argued that thinking is the most noble, education the easiest, and experience the most painful. The issue we face today is that hardly anyone pauses to consider the consequences of their actions anymore; people simply live for the moment, only to find themselves in a bind later when they're looking for a way out. Real guidance seems to have vanished, too—kids these days are being raised by television, computers, the Microsoft Xbox, and whatever peer group they happen to run with at school. As for experience, the wise learn from the mistakes of others, while the fool fails to learn even from his own.

Matthew Sullivan32 said:.....

Intelligent people focus on practical problems, somewhat less intelligent people debate events, and fools spend their time discussing people.

Carl Hernandez2 said:Matthew Sullivan32, you really are something else. You managed to look at Peter Myers29’s username and deduce that he's somehow under 25. Sharp.

It’s fascinating how, when people run out of actual arguments, they immediately pivot to searching for excuses to discredit someone else. Most often, they just fall back on age. Apparently, because I’m younger, I simply don't have a clue. If I happened to be older than him, I’d probably be dismissed as old and senile, wouldn't I?

Carl Hernandez2 said:Look, man, the women you claim to be "meeting" wouldn't give you the time of day, and I honestly get the feeling even Peter Myers29 isn't particularly interested in any of them either.

I wouldn't even trust those enough to lean my bike against them. 😁

Carl Hernandez2 said:It’s better to be a man than a phony.

Exactly. And honestly, what’s the harm in someone being a guy? At least he's being upfront about how he thinks, plus there's no need to worry about any drama or the complications of accidental offspring.

Peter Myers29 said:Exactly. And honestly, what's the harm in being a guy? At least you know where you stand—no worrying about catching some random disease or accidentally starting a family you didn't plan for.

Look, it’s not just about dodging an STI or avoiding unplanned kids anymore. Someone actually using their head ends up with the best of both worlds—depending on how you look at it. But someone who avoids sex entirely—no risks, no kids, nothing? That person is either living in total fear or they're stuck in some crappy indie movie...

Kenneth Alvarez37 said:It’s not just about avoiding illness or accidental parenthood. Anyone using their head probably finds the best of both worlds—depending on how you look at it. But someone who avoids sex entirely, along with any risk of disease or unplanned kids? They're either living in fear or stuck in a bad movie.

Moderation is key; that goes without saying. But when you say, "someone who avoids sex entirely... is living in fear or a bad movie," the implication is that people choosing to be selective aren't just cautious, but somehow odd or repressed. On the flip side, if someone lives recklessly and ends up facing health issues or an unexpected pregnancy, they act as if it’s everyone else's fault rather than their own.

At the end of the day, we all live with the consequences of our own choices.

Peter Myers29 said:Smart people discuss practical issues, slightly less smart people discuss events, and fools discuss people.

That’s the absolute truth—except on this forum, where unfortunately it seems the third group is by far the most prevalent 😢

But, anyway, getting back to the point:

LeeLooo said:A friend of mine had her period come about 10 days late—but since she’s usually pretty irregular anyway, she wasn’t "super" worried about it.
Today she finally took a test, and unfortunately, it was positive. (She even bought one of those expensive ones and used her first morning urine)...
If anyone could PM me a number for a good OB-GYN, or maybe some advice regarding this...

People are looking for solutions here...
If someone is actually looking for help, then I guess they should only be hearing from people who have actual information that can assist in solving the problem. I really don't see any reason for all this bickering over who is younger, prettier, or smarter... or whose dad is tougher. 😁

It is honestly just ridiculous to debate morality here—and even more so to argue about who is right. Everyone has an opinion, sure, but the moment someone voices one, they get swarmed by a bunch of people acting like they know better...
An opinion is just an opinion; it doesn't automatically make someone right. You don't have to agree with them, but as soon as a perspective is shared, the person is immediately attacked and the whole conversation is derailed... which is exactly what is happening here this time. If people used actual arguments more often, the "keyboard warriors" would be in the minority. 😉

I understand the young woman involved; please, just help her with facts or perhaps share some experience that might help her resolve the situation and make a decision. But that decision needs to be HERS, so please keep your moralizing to yourselves.

Rijeka woman said:A woman is ready to become a mother and is emotionally mature enough for motherhood when she decides, alongside a partner she loves and trusts, to bring a child into the world as a product of love rather than an accident or random sex—when she is prepared to provide that child with love, as well as a financially secure childhood, a home, and warmth...

This is a statement I fully support and agree with... and thank God everyone stays focused on responses like that instead of continuing like, for example:

Rijeka woman said:Seriously, go back under a rock, you pathetic brajšin, and take your miserable little carrot with you... maybe you can find some nun-turned-escort to satisfy your needs so you can stop trying to lecture this forum—especially in the HEALTH subforum!
And, yeah... reach out to Machummer, so he can sell you—sorry, swap—some potency pills that also happen to fix digestive issues... he's got all sorts of miracle cures.

...which just invites everyone else to chime in with that mindless "me too, me too" mentality....
Honestly, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to maintain even a shred of basic decency—something that should be a given for everyone, let alone someone with an advanced degree. 😉

Some people even have the audacity to point it out:

d@d@ said:So, you're actually a doctor—with a real degree? 😕

Apparently, having a doctorate grants you some kind of immunity and special status here with the moderators; it seems like being obnoxious, insulting, and downright nasty has become part of someone's "brand" because of it... 😉

She attacked first, and now she’s defending herself because:

Rijeka woman said:What, did you think doctors were supposed to be total pushovers who just tolerate idiots surrounding them?
And please, don't start with the whole Hippocrates cliché nonsense—I just finished dinner and I'd really rather not deal with any indigestion.
Yes, I have a degree. A real one. My dad didn't buy it for me.
If that bothers you, well, sorry about that, but you aren't going to be my patient anyway... since I'm not a psychiatrist.

There you go, d@d@—you're lucky your psychiatrist isn't one of those "people who pick fights here," because they wouldn't apply to her.... 😉
(and now I'm in the doghouse too, basically waiting for the ban hammer) 😁
And here is a rather interesting (and logical) way to look at it:

Peter Myers29 said:No matter how you slice it, people fail to realize that a human being is made up of three things: education, character, and IQ. Education, obviously, is what you know—what schools you attended. IQ is your ability to navigate new situations (sort of like your brain's "processing speed"). And character... well, let's just call it the level of social or antisocial behavior.

Someone can be a doctor with ten degrees and a 200 IQ, but if they act like a complete jerk, then they're just a jerk. And those types are everywhere because they think a piece of paper makes them some kind of deity....

This brings us back to square one: before you try to fix someone else's problems, maybe take a good long look in the mirror. Don't lecture others on things you wouldn't want directed at yourself, and don't say things you wouldn't want said to you. A little more tolerance around here really wouldn't hurt... 🙂
(though, naturally, we'd expect more professional insight from a doctor)

👋

casualnomad42 said:Apparently, having an MD gives you some kind of untouchable immunity and VIP status with the moderators here.

Please... 😂 I doubt I'll ever read anything else on this site. At this rate, they’ll probably throw in a beachfront villa in Malibu just for being part of the club. It’s practically a proven fact. 👍

#2 And no, I really don't care who you think you are. 🤣

Scarlet Letter said::

#2 And no, I'm not even going to bother asking who you think you are. 🤣

To me, this just sounds like a fourth nickname from MacGregor, Hummer, or Fuller 😂 😂 😂

by the way, I managed to secure my villa as permanent property 😬

casualnomad42 said:Honestly, nimblewalker58, you’re lucky enough that it wasn't your own psychiatrist dealing with this, because those labels regarding "the women jumping in here" certainly don't apply to everyone... 😉
(And hey, now I'm officially out of favor too—just sitting here waiting for my disciplinary hearing to wrap up) 😁
But check out this little bit of "logic" I put together:

👋

My mistake, really; I reacted to the tone of the conversation rather than the actual statement itself. It always strikes me as odd how people with advanced degrees can be so incredibly comfortable with public insults.
😢