Emergency: My friend is pregnant

Hannah Davis18 said:He’s changed his worldview to assume anyone over 20 is an old lady.😉
Well, boundaries shift, and you don't exactly know my age anyway.

Care to point out where I actually said that? My question was specifically about when a woman reaches the emotional maturity required to be a mother. If you have an answer, go ahead; if not, perhaps it's best to stay quiet.

Hannah Davis18 said:Good intentions and a heart as big as Texas won't change reality.

It changes quite a bit; you just happen to be unaware of it.

Peter Myers29 said:I know I won't... and honestly, that's what weighs on me. It's heartbreaking—for her and for the kid too.

Trust me, you aren't feeling the weight of this any more than she is—even if you refuse to believe it right now.

Peter Myers29 said:Show me where I actually said that. I just asked you when a woman is emotionally mature enough to be a mom. If you have an answer, go ahead, if not then maybe just stay quiet.

It changes big time, you just don't get it...

1. whenever she decides to become a mother.
I mean, once she’s lived a bit, tried finishing school, and has some kind of income—even if it isn't a steady career. An 18-year-old girl isn't ready to be a parent, at least not for most of them.
2. and how does it change? You already have kids and you're still supporting a bunch of losers through social services?

nimbledriver81 said:Even if you don't want to believe it, she's likely hurting just as much as you are.

If she’s actually feeling that way, why keep doing it?

Peter Myers29 said:If she actually feels bad about it, then why on earth is she still doing it?

Well—it’s because she’s essentially just a kid herself, really! She's facing such an uncertain future, and let's be honest, her boyfriend isn't exactly providing a safety net here. As for her family? We don't know a thing about them—for all we know, they might just kick her out onto the street right along with the baby...

Peter Myers29, or maybe I should just say Tukan—you aren't going to tell me to shut up. NEVER. 😈
Try saying that to your future wife, if you ever actually find one...

A woman is ready to embrace motherhood and possesses the emotional maturity for it when she decides, alongside a partner she loves and trusts, to bring a child into the world as a product of love rather than an accident or a random hookup. She’s ready when she can provide that child with affection, a stable home, and financial security...

Anything else is irrelevant!
And at 25 years old, are you actually prepared to be the kind of father who provides a home, food, diapers, and an education for his child and their mother? Or are you just talking big without any actual foundation? 🙂
I have a feeling the latter is more your speed. 😈

nimbleskipper13 said:Peter Myers29, or perhaps more accurately, Tukan, you’re going to tell me to shut up? NEVER.

This just highlights your level of respect for your interlocutor—and for basic civility, really. You have an ego the size of a mountain paired with the mindset of a single-celled organism. Enjoy yourself. Have it your way. The wiser person simply lets it go.

tukan, respect has to be earned, and based on how you're acting, you haven't 😈

Your insults don't affect me: it’s not about what is said, but WHO 🙂

And you don't carry any weight with me 🙂

nimbleskipper13 said:Look, tukan, respect isn't just handed out; you have to earn it through how you carry yourself, and frankly, based on your recent little performance, you haven't exactly earned it yet. 😈

And don't bother trying to throw insults my way because they aren't hitting the mark at all—it’s never really about the content of the argument, is it? It’s about WHO is making it. 🙂

As for you personally, I don't hold any particular grudge against you. 🙂

So, tell me, are you actually a doctor—like, with an actual medical degree and everything? 😕

nimblewalker58 said:Are you actually a doctor, like, with a degree? 😕

Do you honestly think being a doctor means having to be a pushover and tolerate idiots?
And please, let's skip the whole Hippocrates thing and those tired clichés. I just finished dinner and I'd rather not deal with any indigestion. 🙂

Yes, I have a legitimate degree. My dad didn't buy it for me.
If that bothers you, I'm sorry, but it's not like you'll be my patient anyway... I'm not a psychiatrist. 😈

You’re missing that whole social and empathetic component, and look, I’m not questioning anyone's technical expertise here, but it would honestly break my heart if I found out you all were actually like this.
😢

nimblewalker58 said:You're lacking a social and empathetic component. I'm not questioning your expertise, but it would truly be a shame if you discovered everyone here was like this.
😢

Come on, do you seriously believe you can make a valid assessment of my personality or social skills based on a few forum posts?

Or were you reading tea leaves or something? 😈

"If we're all like this"...that sounds like a lot of prejudice and overgeneralization to me. Seriously, stop guessing and just take a test instead:

http://www.4degreez.com/misc/persona...sorder_test.mv

👋

The link isn't working for you.

I formed my opinion based on several different posts, but honestly, doesn't it seem a bit unprofessional to be handing out diagnoses over the internet?

And look, wouldn't you probably want to consult your own colleagues first if I were the one actually building your house?😕

I'm heading out; this level of conversation just isn't for me.👋

nimblewalker58 said:That link isn't working.

I formed my opinion based on several posts. Besides, diagnosing someone over the internet doesn't seem particularly professional to me.

And honestly, wouldn't you consult your own colleagues before letting me build your house?😕

I'm out; this level of conversation isn't for me.👋

Thanks for pointing out the broken link; I'll need to check that...
By the way, that's just a fun quiz, not an attempt at online diagnosis.

As for building a house... I don't think that's ever happening. I definitely don't have the budget for a house right now.😁

👋

I just checked, and it works now

http://www.4degreez.com/misc/persona...sorder_test.mv

My bad—I typed a "w" instead of a "v" in the previous link...

My scores were pretty much all low, except for being moderate on the narcissism scale—not like they’re actually going to make a buck off me or anything 😢
I mean, I’ve already seen myself in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest"😁

So, there she goes again, mocking shadows: claiming we’re all just moderate narcissists.
😂 😂 😂

nimblewalker58 said:You're missing the social and empathetic component. I’m not questioning anyone's credentials, but it would be a shame if you discovered everyone was actually like that.
😢

No matter how you slice it, people just don't grasp that a person is built from three distinct pillars: education, character, and intelligence. Education is straightforward enough—it's basically just what school you attended. Intelligence is your ability to navigate new situations, a sort of "processing speed" for the brain. Then there's character, which I'll define simply as the spectrum between social and asocial behavior.

Someone can be a doctor with ten degrees and an IQ- 200, but if their character is that of an idiot, they're still an idiot. Unfortunately, those types are everywhere because they assume a piece of paper gives them some kind of divine authority.

nimbledriver81 said:🤔 I’m honestly surprised Hummer didn't suggest a plant-based diet...

😁

I asked you specifically—when is a woman actually emotionally mature enough to become a mother?

It’s when they actually want a kid BEFORE conception happens... otherwise, I might as well ask how many children these pro-life types even have themselves...