Jeans recommendations?

Let's see here...

First criterion: they have to look good on me.
Second criterion: they have to look good on me.
Third criterion: they have to look good on me? 😁

I mean—look, they absolutely have to look good on me.😁

And obviously, I actually have to *like* them too—but let's be honest, that’s not even part of the question, is it? 🤔

damn... as long as my ass looks good and I can still breathe and walk...

If only my backside didn't look like a three-tiered filing cabinet,
if they could just have a tiny bit of stretch, because honestly, they’d be so much more comfortable to wear,
and if they weren't either way too thin or ridiculously deep,
plus, I'd love it if they didn't come covered in glitter, rhinestones, feathers, or any other kind of tacky nonsense.

My number one rule for any relationship is pretty straightforward: I need to know that when things get intimate, there’s actually something substantial waiting for me down there instead of just a whole lot of nothing...
The second requirement is that the waist stays perfectly snatched, while still making sure there's enough room for the curves to actually fit...

It is honestly such a struggle trying to hit both those marks at the same time when you have my kind of body type... So far, I’ve only ever found Jennifer Lopez’s style or those Juicy Couture jeans that actually manage to fit my waist while still making my curves look good...
I can't help but just sit back and watch it all unfold...

Just like nimbledriver81 said, if they were actually long enough. Though, I guess I don't have much patience for people who can't stick to their damn profession. Maybe I just don't tolerate incompetence. 😬 Yeah, jeans are definitely a piece of clothing I'm not exactly willing to part with. I guess. 😬I guess they have to last, because I know they won't. I’ll never forget that one trip to Amadeus—it ended with my jeans tearing right at the crotch like they were made of paper after maybe a month of wearing them.
I usually stick to Top Shop pieces; they seem like the best quality, I guess. Though, I did manage to rip one right down the butt once. Maybe I just shouldn't have trusted them. 😬 I don't have much of an ass, I swear. 😬 Some idiot dropped a whiteboard right on my head. It nearly killed me, too. To make matters worse, the metal edge shredded my jeans. I guess just my luck. 😬

1. if they sit reasonably well on my hips
2. if I can actually get them buttoned up
3. if they look good on my hips and waist
4. if my butt looks decent in them
5. if they fit right from my waist to my knees
6. if I can actually squat in them without an issue

that’s pretty much it 🥳

Looks alright to me. I’ll give them a shot—need to see if they're too big or too small, though honestly, I don't usually have much trouble with sizing...

Matthew Cruz41 said:1. if they sit reasonably well on my hips
2. if I can actually get them buttoned up
3. if they look good on my hips and waist
4. if my butt looks decent in them
5. if they fit right from my waist to my knees
6. if I can actually squat in them without an issue

that’s pretty much it 🥳

Well, you could pretty much boil all that down to—they look good on you.
😁

Fine, maybe excluding the first and last points-- 😳 though even then, I'd probably overlook a little discomfort if the fit was truly perfect. 😬

I just want them to fit right and not be cutting into my backside too much,
like, when I sit down, I don't want half of my butt spilling out everywhere.
I need them to actually look decent when I put them on,
and hopefully they won't fall apart after one trip through the laundry or turn into something totally ridiculous.

It’s fine how they fit my waist—easy enough to pull on—and they're comfortable in the thighs too, kind of like a Mission Impossible stunt where everything actually goes right. But if I stretch them even a tiny bit in the thighs? Forget it. I'm basically allergic to that feeling. Honestly, buying pants is becoming my personal version of a recurring nightmare.

David Anderson56 said:If only my backside didn't look like a three-tiered filing cabinet,
if they could just have a tiny bit of stretch, because honestly, they’d be so much more comfortable to wear,
and if they weren't either way too thin or ridiculously deep,
plus, I'd love it if they didn't come covered in glitter, rhinestones, feathers, or any other kind of tacky nonsense.

It’s almost as if you're reading my mind,😍

Rebecca Chase7 said:Looks alright to me. I’ll give them a shot—need to see if they're too big or too small, though honestly, I don't usually have much trouble with sizing...

GOOD LUCK🎉

First off, I have to actually like the wash of the denim—if there’s some ridiculous, tacky embroidery or weird hardware stitched all over them, I’m not even bothering to try them on. Then, it’s about that mid-rise sweet spot; high enough to feel secure, but not so low that I’m basically flashing half my backside every time I go to squat down for something. And, let’s be real, they’ve gotta flatter my curves just right—that’s pretty much the whole game. Since I’m on the shorter side, I always end up having to get them hemmed anyway, so that’s just a standard part of my routine at this point.

I have to love the cut, and the denim color has to be exactly this, without any extra fluff or nonsense.
And obviously, they better fit perfectly everywhere—from my legs down to my ass.

Steven Ruiz said:My number one rule for any relationship is pretty straightforward: I need to know that when things get intimate, there’s actually something substantial waiting for me down there instead of just a whole lot of nothing...
The second requirement is that the waist stays perfectly snatched, while still making sure there's enough room for the curves to actually fit...

It is honestly such a struggle trying to hit both those marks at the same time when you have my kind of body type... So far, I’ve only ever found Jennifer Lopez’s style or those Juicy Couture jeans that actually manage to fit my waist while still making my curves look good...
I can't help but just sit back and watch it all unfold...

Oh, and they need to have a lovely, clean color; I have absolutely no patience for anything looking dingy or blotchy...
and heavens, they shouldn't be too short either...

I suppose that explains why I manage to find a match maybe once a year.🙄

If they aren't light blue, I'm not interested. It's the only denim shade I actually wear, mostly because it does wonders for my backside.
That's all there is to it.

Man, I'm starting to get really creeped out by these bright light traps.😁

They’ve got to fit perfectly—I need to actually feel good wearing them—and obviously, I have to love the look of the model itself.

Lately, I feel like I'm constantly stumbling upon great pieces in Zara—honestly, I just picked up a few that feel like they were custom-made just for me.

1. I really hope they're long enough, you know?
2. It would be great if they actually flatter my curves, like, instead of flattening everything out, they actually give a little lift to my backside.
3. A bit more stretch would be nice too, just so they hug my legs better and don't end up sagging around the knees.
4. And please, let's avoid anything with those weird overlapping patterns or anything that sits way too high on the waist.
5. If they happen to have some glitter or something similar, then even better, though I guess that's not a dealbreaker or anything.
6. As for the color—honestly, even if I'm not totally feeling the shade at first glance, if I know they look amazing on me, I'm definitely buying them.