Topic of the day: What's the ideal age to get married?

What do you mean you can't just leave? Plenty of people bail, live apart for ages, and basically end things without even a formal divorce. And honestly, if both sides are on the same page, getting a divorce is pretty quick and easy.
After three years of living together, the law basically treats it like a marriage anyway, just without the official paperwork. Especially if there are kids involved, it gets complicated even sooner. 🤷

You don't just jump into marriage whenever you feel like it—you do it when you’re actually ready for the weight of it. It means being prepared to reshape your entire life around your family and your community, and being willing to make those necessary sacrifices for the sake of the group. Anything else is just playing numbers games...

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For women: at age 27.4528
For men: At age 28.3634

Calculated using formulas typically found in quantum electrodynamics.

Once you hit 35...

Melissa Rivera said:Once you hit 35...

Nah.

Just look at the math.
Quantum electrodynamics. 🧐

Walter Davis said:What do you mean you can't just leave? Plenty of people bail, live apart for ages, and basically end things without even a formal divorce. And honestly, if both sides are on the same page, getting a divorce is pretty quick and easy.
After three years of living together, the law basically treats it like a marriage anyway, just without the official paperwork. Especially if there are kids involved, it gets complicated even sooner. 🤷

That’s a fair question... how can one just "not be able" to leave? I did mention the contracts and signatures earlier, which can just as easily be signed to end things—aside from the shared mortgage, of course.

For me, the kids were the main hurdle. I felt they needed a father, and I was terrified that if we split, I might not end up with custody of both children. Beyond that, my own sense of commitment held me back. I kept thinking maybe there was some way to fix what was broken. Then there were just my emotions getting in the way.

Breaking a bond between two people isn't simple. I wanted out, but it wasn't easy for me. In the end, he was the one who ended it. That's just how I am—when I commit to something, I go all in, and walking away doesn't come easy.

Tyler Rodriguez4 said:Nah.

Just look at the math.
Quantum electrodynamics. 🧐

Anything under 30 is basically a joke... I'm getting hitched in two years, mark my words...

👍

Nicholas King said:Three years after saying "I do" on a beach somewhere, you find that partners hold onto each other—or let go—just as much as those who have already tied the knot legally.

You’re right. That was my first thought, too. But honestly? I want to see what else is out there.🤣

Melissa Rivera said:Anything under 30 is basically a joke... I'm getting hitched in two years, mark my words...

👍

Did you finish those tests on Meta?

mistyhound94 said:Did you finish those tests on Meta?

Some lady at the coffee shop started lecturing me...

We spend our best years chasing the perfect partner and the ideal circumstances, believing if we just collect enough of these "right" pieces, everything will click; yet, the more you hunt for perfection, the harder the fall when you realize how many of those components were actually wrong all along. 🐔

Or perhaps there is no such thing as right or wrong, only what you desire and what brings you a sense of peace in the moment 🕺

ruggedscout76 said:We spend our best years chasing the perfect partner and the ideal circumstances, believing if we just collect enough of these "right" pieces, everything will click; yet, the more you hunt for perfection, the harder the fall when you realize how many of those components were actually wrong all along. 🐔

Or perhaps there is no such thing as right or wrong, only what you desire and what brings you a sense of peace in the moment 🕺

Totally agree, though we don't really look at it that way when we're 20, 30, 40, or 50...

It's all just shades of gray.

I feel like most guys stay pretty immature until they hit at least 28 or 30. That’s usually when life starts shifting—your habits change and your priorities finally settle down. Of course, there are exceptions to my rule, people who aren't acting like kids before they turn 28, but for most, that's when a sense of seriousness and wisdom actually kicks in. I’m specifically talking about men here, not women. Honestly, even at 32, the idea of marriage hasn't even crossed my mind, let alone having kids. 😁

I agree; I think you really need to live together for a trial period before committing to marriage—at least six months. But more importantly, both partners need to be living away from their parents. You need enough distance so they can't just swoop in to help out with everything. That way, you actually see how you function as a unit, how you handle tension, and how you truly split up the housework.

In my opinion, a safe distance from your parents would be 31 miles. Far enough away that they can't just pop in, but close enough that you can head over if they ever need a hand. But they shouldn't be able to step in and fix things for you on a daily basis.😁

I guess the best move is just to get all the wild stuff out of your system in your 20s while you can still stay up all night, then maybe settle down and get married in your 30s😁

Honestly, being a young parent is such a massive win... you can actually get stuff done before you hit 30

ruggedscout76 said:We spend our best years chasing the perfect partner and the ideal circumstances, believing if we just collect enough of these "right" pieces, everything will click; yet, the more you hunt for perfection, the harder the fall when you realize how many of those components were actually wrong all along. 🐔

Or perhaps there is no such thing as right or wrong, only what you desire and what brings you a sense of peace in the moment 🕺

The only thing that actually matters for women is the gear. Not too long, not too short. Just right.

Marriage doesn't hold any emotional weight for me personally; I just see it as a legal contract you sign to make life logistics easier (plus, in some states, you get a massive tax break 😁). So, honestly, the timing doesn't matter much to me, though I guess it’s not a bad idea if two people actually feel like they're going to stick together for the long haul.

As for kids—I say the sooner the better, even though there's no way on earth I'd be talked into having a kid by age 20. But (unpopular opinion alert), young people are often totally fine as parents, mostly because they don't overthink things and have this chill vibe that older folks just lose. They finish college, find their footing, and then by their 30s, they’re free to go wild again if they feel like it. And it's not exactly a blessing to find out you're infertile at 38; you've got a much better shot at handling it if you know early on.

When it comes to hooking up—whenever. Back in my younger days, I wasn't even interested in sex, and seeing those senior citizens enrolled in college makes me feel so depressed 😬, but I know couples who've been happy since high school, and others who didn't even find their person until their 50s.

@MOP is totally right when it comes to early parenting. Honestly, I think 20 definitely wasn't the right age for marriage, but I feel okay about having my first child at 21. It means by the time I hit my 40s, I'll finally have that freedom to fly the coop—and I guess that thought alone keeps me going! 🤣

For some people, it’s just never 🤣.

I’d argue it’s better to start a family in your twenties—even if things aren't perfectly lined up—than to wait until later in life.