Is everyone just becoming more selfish these days?

Sandra Parker3 said:+

So, do you think selfless people should see a therapist? It seems to me 🤣
btw, I don't think anyone actually fits perfectly into a box; nobody is entirely selfish or entirely selfless all the time, it’s just that our actions lean one way or the other more than others.

I think it's healthier to be selfish, because nothing beats loving yourself.

Drew Flores3 already pointed this out, but it's worth repeating... selfishness and self-love aren't the same thing, so you can't just use them interchangeably.

Richard Wells said:Man, I read way too much stuff on here sometimes 😁
Like this whole idea of equating self-love with being selfish 😳 Or even the notion that selfishness is what drives us while altruism just holds us back 🙄 It’s such a blatant flip of common sense in today’s world, but let me try to address it without sounding like I'm lecturing everyone... What if someone's "self-love" is actually over the top and constantly stepping on other people's toes? That's just straight-up selfishness. Real self-love stays within your own lane and doesn't mess with anyone else's space. And what if a person genuinely loves themselves and finds pure joy in giving to others without expecting a thing in return? Are they stupid? Naive? Fine... people will take advantage of them, but whose fault is that really? Who's actually losing out here? I guess the solution is to either stop giving or start calculating every single move just to stay "protected." We've just reached a point where we can't feel a single emotion without using a calculator 🙄

Richard Wells said:I wasn't even thinking about wealthy people while I was typing, but let's just pretend I was so I can throw a similar question back at you... If you hand a rich guy more cash, it won't mean a thing to him in that moment. But if you give him a hug or do something genuinely kind from the heart—something he doesn't have to pay for—will that actually matter to him? Will he actually feel it?

ambersailor85 said:Selfless people really ought to try therapy—specifically that movie trope where they smash a vase and yell "enough is enough!" 😁 Being selfless usually goes hand-in-hand with being a pushover. You get these people who are always running errands for everyone else; if someone calls or asks for a favor, they just can't say no because they "don't want to hurt feelings." It's those types who genuinely don't know how to receive anything, even if they haven't realized it yet, but they're constantly giving.

The way I see it, a selfless person can never say no when someone asks, begs, or even demands something. The second you push back, you're suddenly looking out for yourself—which is actually fine.

A selfless person ends up carrying a lot of internal frustration, because it eats at them that they can't just say "no" and finally grab something for themselves in this world. They turn bitter, even if they stay selfless, and it just gnaws at them until they develop an inferiority complex and start second-guessing every decision they make.

To me, a selfless person is like that kid in elementary school who lets a bully take his snack or lunch money; he gives it away, but it kills him inside because he's left hungry and broke, while some teacher or parent fails to teach him how to stand up for himself. That's when they finally realize that being Selfish is actually a healthy trait.

I've always found the statement "Oh, he's such an egoist, he only thinks about himself" hilarious. I honestly don't see what's so bad about it—at least you're living straight, standing for something, fighting for what you want, and not harboring resentment because someone took advantage of you.

Selfless people are basically trophies for every egoist out there! 🙂

Quick test for you guys: how much of a pushover are you? 🙂
Can someone please translate this into English for me? And not through some cheap online translator. Whoever actually does it can truly claim to be selfless, because I might need this translation for a specific purpose and I need someone to translate this whole post from start to finish. 🙂 I need it by 6 PM tomorrow. 🙂 Since I'm being Selfish and looking out for myself, I'm making various requests and presenting them so you all can do them as efficiently, quickly, and high-quality as possible. 🙂

Selfless people are basically trophies for every egoist out there! 🙂

Richard Wells said:I wasn't even thinking about wealthy people while I was typing, but let's just pretend I was so I can throw a similar question back at you... If you hand a rich guy more cash, it won't mean a thing to him in that moment. But if you give him a hug or do something genuinely kind from the heart—something he doesn't have to pay for—will that actually matter to him? Will he actually feel it?

ambersailor85 said:To a true materialist, a hug doesn't mean much—let's face it, most people who climb to the top aren't doing it by being warm and fuzzy with everyone they meet. But the real headache? It's the broke materialists. 🤣 They're just fueled by frustration, envy, and pure bitterness.

Think about the pool cleaners, gardeners, or house staff working for those big-money families.
They're always there, but they're never really "part of the family." And still, people try to tip them extra, acting like, "Oh, he's just a poor Mexican or Cuban guy who wouldn't have anything back home, so my extra $100 will really help him out."

In my book, the only thing that would actually touch a wealthy person is if you saved them from a massive financial blunder—like warning them about a risky investment right before they go bust. That's the only time they'd feel truly lucky. Everything else—hugs, gifts, cleaning the pool, baking muffins, mowing the lawn, driving the kids to school—it all just feels trivial to them.

But if you actually pull them back from the edge of bankruptcy? Now we're talking. That's when a wealthy person might actually feel genuine joy and gratitude, and honestly, that's one of the few selfless acts that matters to them. Though, hey, a massive reward might follow that, too. 😉

Since you can buy basically anyone these days, wealthy people find very little interesting and almost nothing catches their eye.

The only way to really get through to them is if you:

- Save or grow their wealth with solid advice
- Save their life as a doctor or pharmacist
- Pull them from a wreck or a drowning accident
- Save their kids or parents—since they probably don't value them that much anyway
- Or maybe save their dog.

The only way to get through to them is if you:

Richard Wells said:Man, I read way too much stuff on here sometimes 😁
Like this whole idea of equating self-love with being selfish 😳 Or even the notion that selfishness is what drives us while altruism just holds us back 🙄 It’s such a blatant flip of common sense in today’s world, but let me try to address it without sounding like I'm lecturing everyone... What if someone's "self-love" is actually over the top and constantly stepping on other people's toes? That's just straight-up selfishness. Real self-love stays within your own lane and doesn't mess with anyone else's space. And what if a person genuinely loves themselves and finds pure joy in giving to others without expecting a thing in return? Are they stupid? Naive? Fine... people will take advantage of them, but whose fault is that really? Who's actually losing out here? I guess the solution is to either stop giving or start calculating every single move just to stay "protected." We've just reached a point where we can't feel a single emotion without using a calculator 🙄

Sandra Parker3 said:but let's be real, that isn't called being selfless, 😁
it's just weakness.

Selfless people are basically trophies for every egoist out there! 🙂

It's hardly a trophy if you pick it up without breaking a sweat.

It'll mean whatever they happen to need at that exact second, whether it's cash or just a kind gesture.
I assume you haven't watched this?

They didn't say "materialist," they said "wealthy."

The only way to get through to them is if you:

🙄

feralranger said:I implore you, please, attempt to draw a clear line between practicing self-love and acting out of pure selfishness. Try to provide a definition that is actually universal and objectively grounded...

feralranger said:ambersailor85, while I can't say I particularly care for your blatant selfishness, I will at least grant you this: you are honest about it.

It seems to me that most people are far too prone to living in a sort of bubble of delusion, constantly peddling this idea of "self-love" as if it were somehow distinct from pure narcissism...

This is precisely why we are bombarded by endless commercials that wrap up with those vacuous slogans like "Because you're worth it," or some other such nonsense. We are encouraged to suppress any awareness of our own egoism, a little psychological trick that serves the consumerist machine perfectly well...

ambersailor85 said:So how do you handle that exclusion phase? Like, does it just mean being indifferent? 🙂

Drew Flores3 said:Indifference is a tricky word... what you're really looking for isn't being selfish, it's more about non-attachment.

ambersailor85 said:Not sure where I picked this up, but it’s a killer metaphor for how society works today—even if it feels like an old fable from somewhere out East.

Basically, some higher power decides that when you pass away, you head to a place that looks like a dining room filled with every delicious meal imaginable. The rule is simple: once you've eaten, you get to indulge in whatever your heart desires next—whether that's just lounging around, chasing romance, or whatever else—and the cycle just repeats every day. It doesn't matter if you were a saint or a sinner; everyone goes to the same place. The only catch? You have to eat using chopsticks that are over six feet long.

Selfish people who end up there can never actually enjoy anything. Their greed drives them to try and grab as much food as possible, but they’ll never succeed because those massive chopsticks make it impossible to grab a bite. On the flip side, generous people will just feed one another and live better than they ever did on Earth.

What’s your take on the people who only care about themselves?

I heard this specific version was used to describe the souls stuck in Hell.

ambersailor85 said:Not sure where I picked this up, but it’s a killer metaphor for how society works today—even if it feels like an old fable from somewhere out East.

Basically, some higher power decides that when you pass away, you head to a place that looks like a dining room filled with every delicious meal imaginable. The rule is simple: once you've eaten, you get to indulge in whatever your heart desires next—whether that's just lounging around, chasing romance, or whatever else—and the cycle just repeats every day. It doesn't matter if you were a saint or a sinner; everyone goes to the same place. The only catch? You have to eat using chopsticks that are over six feet long.

Selfish people who end up there can never actually enjoy anything. Their greed drives them to try and grab as much food as possible, but they’ll never succeed because those massive chopsticks make it impossible to grab a bite. On the flip side, generous people will just feed one another and live better than they ever did on Earth.

What’s your take on the people who only care about themselves?

I heard this specific version was used to describe the souls stuck in Hell.

wearyhawk83 said:Honestly, there’s nothing wrong with being self-focused as long as you aren't stepping on anyone else to get ahead. If everyone just took care of their own business first, the world would actually be a much happier place—we'd all start sharing from a place of abundance instead of just trying to make every little trade!

ambersailor85 said:Maybe it's some kind of punishment then—like they physically can't feed themselves.
But clearly, that new info isn't sinking in, because people don't eat with their hands, they use their heads. It's probably like being blind—they just don't see the obstacles in front of them.

True, but when someone is selfish and greedy, once they realize there's nothing left to take from you, they aren't gonna stick around to help.🙂

If Person A has a spoonful of food and Person B has none, Person A isn't exactly thinking, "Hey, let me give this to them, maybe they'll share their spoon later."

So basically, it comes down to a lack of trust, suspicion, and greed.

If you've got Person A who's broke and Person B who's loaded, Person B isn't gonna hand anything over if they're just selfish, greedy, and tight-fisted.🤷

ambersailor85 said:That's what true selflessness looks like—when you actually step back and say yes to someone else's request or idea.

Finding a selfless person in life is a huge win because, let's face it, most people are pretty selfish.
A wealthy person is a materialist. They’ve basically built their whole life around acquiring things. They live by that Ford philosophy of "having." To them, having is being.

Then there's the poor person—for them, "being" is just a hollow consolation prize they use as a lifelong philosophy. Since they can't have anything, they lean into it; instead of venting about wanting to be rich, they'd rather play the part of the idealist or the altruist.

But honestly, that person carries the same frustrations as the selfless one. Usually, being broke and being selfless go hand in hand.

Finding a selfless person to have in your life is a massive win because most people are just selfish.

ambersailor85 said:Your take actually reminded me of that one episode of Malcolm in the Middle where Hal goes to one of those motivational seminars filled with totally insecure people.
When someone hits you twenty times with "you can do it" or "this is waiting for you," it's a total scam—just like those late-night calls for free dinners, insurance agents, psychics, or weight loss pills.

More and more ads address you directly as "you"—mostly because psychologists behind the campaigns realized how desperate people feel when they aren't the center of attention. It gives them this little ego boost when an ad tells them, "you deserve this," or "treat yourself and your family."

At the end of the day, anyone who claims to "love themselves" is being selfish—true self-love pretty much blows right past any idea of being selfless or altruistic.

I bet even spiritual leaders are just as selfish, too—they act like they're somehow above the rest of us. Honestly, pretty much any religion does the same thing.

brightbadger54 said:There is no such thing as a selfless person, really. It is merely a question of in which situations an individual chooses to exhibit their selfishness. Everyone has limits. Even someone like Mother Theresa was likely selfish under certain specific circumstances. The point, I guess, is whether that selfishness harms others or just serves oneself. If it affects others negatively while only benefiting you, that doesn't necessarily make it "wrong"... for instance, "would you give the keys to your house and car to a gang of criminals?" or "would you hand your child over to total strangers?" Of course you wouldn't; you would be acting selfishly by keeping them for yourself. Would you hand over your home and access to a shower to a homeless person for a day? Naturally, you would if you weren't a "selfish" person. Until people realize that the entire world—and perhaps the meaning of life itself—is governed by the highest principle of contradiction, they will struggle to find balance and improve themselves. Some people rebel against contradiction, while others eventually grasp what it means, at which point life takes on a slightly more pleasant hue.🙂

The Jewish and Roman interpretations of faith and the Bible are, incidentally, incorrect. They were constructed to rule over people through fear. Hell and Heaven have nothing to do with that.

You have essentially just described capitalism. Is capitalism a joyful thing, or is it actually a construct where man selfishly looks after his own interests? Selfishness doesn't take from others; it deprives them. Theft is what takes from others.

Would you give a homeless person your home and a shower for one day? Of course you would, unless you're a "selfish" person.