Started by hollowwolf9 · · 👁 9 views · 69 replies
redmarlin3 said:But it’s actually pretty clever and funny once you realize the person behind it has some hearing issues. 🙂
[In case anyone missed this back-and-forth—all white cats are deaf. 😁 It's just in the genes. 😁]
steelskipper5 said:Wait, aren't only blue-eyed white cats deaf? 🤔
redmarlin3 said:Yeah, well, I did a little digging on Google just now; it turns out not all white cats are deaf (they say it's around 80%), and if they have blue eyes, the odds go up significantly. But it’s not a hard rule—a white cat can definitely be deaf without having those blue eyes... 🤷
[Sorry for the off-topic tangent. 🙂]
bluewalker33 said:Yeah, I get it. Everything gets so much more stigmatized back home.
The laws here basically protect anything that could be seen as being minimized, so you have to be careful.
It’s tough enough as it is, especially when people just don't get it—it would be way worse. Like, I went to visit my family over in the Midwest recently and wanted to hit up this shop a bit further out, but my aunt goes, "Why are you going out alone? You'll get carjacked." And I'm like, man... if I said that in Canada, I'd probably be reported for discrimination even though she was just looking out for me. But here, I'm cruising on six-lane highways behind the wheel of a car. They just can't wrap their heads around the fact that I actually drive. It's like they don't even believe I graduated college. Honestly, things can be pretty backward there; it’s a beautiful place, but the prejudice is real. Just gotta stay strong and fight it. America is definitely more modern, so it's easier to push back against that stuff. This whole thing happened while I was visiting the Midwest.
redmarlin3 said:Look, just some encouragement here: I know a woman who is hard of hearing and she works as a high school teacher. 🙂
Something will turn up eventually, sooner or later...
Andrew Garcia2 said:Really? And how does she manage? It's honestly so good to hear about examples like that.🙂
bluewalker33 said:It really just comes down to having enough grit to prove people wrong... You’d be surprised how many cowards out there have zero drive or backbone, yet they still think they have a say in what you do. Those internal flaws people carry? They're way bigger roadblocks to success than anything else...
You'll run into discrimination here and there, sure, but if your willpower is solid, you can push past it. It’s weird how some things just click for us while others feel impossible—that's where our intuition and strength come from. It’s even harder to wrap your head around the quiet ones who just grind through obstacles without making a scene. Some of them actually make it in life despite the odds. But honestly, it’s all about heart. If your soul is alive, it hears everything...
Regarding your mom, I get it—people can be pretty toxic—but that’s still not the best way to handle things when it comes to her daughter. My own mom isn't exactly the cheerleader type; the second I hit a minor setback, she starts doubting if I'll even make it through... But now that I'm getting close to the finish line, I'm starting to believe I'll actually pull through my fourth year of college, even if it's been a hell of a struggle.
bluewalker33 said:I totally get you... Haven't lived in the States for a long time. Growing up, my neighborhood was great and everyone loved me, but elementary school was a different story. Kids could be real jerks, and I dealt with bullying pretty much constantly.
By high school, I’d grown into a cute girl, so guys started hitting on me. It actually confused some of them, considering how much I went through back in grade school. The funniest part was when I started dating—it wasn't my first boyfriend, obviously—and this one guy from elementary school who used to give me such a hard time actually acted surprised. He kept questioning my relationship, acting all jealous once he realized he'd actually grown into a decent-looking guy himself, even though he still wasn't exactly my type.
Now I'm living in Canada, and there's way less discrimination against people with disabilities. People don't really stare if you aren't dressed to the nines. There isn't nearly as much stigma as you find back home, though it still exists. And even the small amount of stigma here feels like too much sometimes, but after visiting Canada after ten years, I was honestly shocked by how much worse things are over there.
It's tough carrying this handicap most days. Sometimes I just have this intense craving to hear things more clearly. When you only have what's left of your hearing, you know what it's like to actually enjoy a favorite song. But I still wish I had better hearing—to hear natural tones without a hearing aid, or to catch every single word in an American drama... but yeah. Since our disability is invisible, people don't always get it because you can't see it, but it affects us maybe even more than those around us, just because we crave that perfect, natural sound.
Some people around here claim to be "proud" of their disability, but I'll put it this way: I'm proud of who I am and everything I've managed to achieve so far. I can say I'm proud of navigating this obstacle, but if I'm being honest, I'd much rather be proud of having better hearing...
bluewalker33 said:Yeah, I know exactly how it feels... That’s why we tend to be a bit more on edge than most people; that ringing in your ears isn't exactly a pleasant soundtrack to live with. I don't wear hearing aids at home, I just lip-read my family, and if I miss something, I just let it slide... Nothing's ever that urgent anyway.
As for guys, you really have to sit them down and have a real, deep conversation to explain what it's actually like living with this. Some of them end up loving you even more because of it, while others just run for the hills out of fear 🙂.
I've never been super open about it—not really. You have to be blunt and tell them exactly how it affects you... But maybe next time when I meet someone new. Actually, I met a guy today and we're grabbing coffee tomorrow; he's about eight years younger than me, so I doubt we'll get serious... But who knows what's going to happen. At least I won't be bored during summer break with him around. He's new in town and hasn't met many people yet.
bluewalker33 said:I talk to them normally, though I'll shout "WHAT?" once in a while and get the usual look... But the real issue is the audio on the TV when some American movie is playing. It sounds nasty and I can't always make out what they're saying.
Tech has come a long way with these digital tones, but even then, it’s never quite sounded natural. Still, technology keeps moving forward, so there's hope. Honestly, sometimes I'll just pull my hair back in a ponytail at school and hope someone notices the hearing aids... or maybe I'll just tell them myself that I can't hear and ask them to speak up a bit...
Andrew Garcia2 said:redmarlin3, I got some kind of error so I'm responding like this... you're from a big city like Chicago, I assume? Growing up, I was the only hard-of-hearing kid in my elementary school, and I'm still the only one in high school, except for one guy who is deaf, but he's graduating soon anyway. How did people socialize in your circles? I've always been a bit of an outsider, but being the only one meant I was constantly picked on, so it's no wonder.😁
bluewalker33, I get why she acts that way, but I still don't get why her close friends would treat me differently or look at me differently because of it... I don't experience it that way. Maybe I haven't truly put myself in her shoes, either. Because of my hearing loss, people actually pushed me twice as hard to study and work, though honestly, most of that depends on me. I don't go looking for special treatment or perks despite the handicap; I just try my best to achieve whatever I can. It's different from some people who are hard-of-hearing and just claim they can't do anything, constantly complaining about how hard it is. When things get tough for me—because there are days when the frustration over my hearing just builds up—I still don't go around whining. There's no point, and nobody would understand anyway.🙂
redmarlin3 said:Yap, NYC. 🙂 As for socialization, I don't think it went particularly well. See, deaf kids would head straight to the FBI after school for daycare, so they didn't really hang out with the rest of us much. They mostly just stuck together with the other deaf kids.