Maria Myers3 said:I’m posting here because I’ve reached a complete dead end—I honestly don't know what else to do. My mom was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia five years ago; she spent two weeks in the hospital back then, and after being discharged, she stayed on her medication and kept up with her injections, which helped significantly. However, three years ago, she stopped taking her meds and skipped all her follow-up appointments. We didn't realize it at the time—communication in our house is nonexistent, and to put it bluntly, my family is completely dysfunctional. Mom is in a terrible state now. The worst part is that my sister and I are constantly in tears, listening to our dad spiral because he has no idea how to handle this. There are moments when it feels like we should all just lock ourselves in a room and cry until we die. My sister is 17 and cries constantly; she talks about death and clearly can't cope anymore—it's obvious she's struggling with depression. I'm 18, but I don't feel independent or secure—it's like I haven't even hit adulthood yet. Every morning, getting out of bed feels impossible because I know another grueling day is waiting for me. I have a psychiatrist appointment scheduled for December because I can't take it anymore; I'm certain I've fallen into a deep depression myself. On top of that, I've been battling trichotillomania for eight years—I finally worked up the courage to tell my doctor about it. Financially, we're drowning. Dad is living on minimum wage, Mom is too, and my sister and I are suffering every single day. I'm in high school, maintaining a 4.0 GPA, and aiming for medical school. My sister is also an honors student and wants to pursue nursing. We both have potential, but the future looks incredibly bleak right now. Mom never gives us anything from her meager paycheck—she doesn't even curse us out for asking, she just spends everything on herself. She constantly claims we only care about her money or that we wish her harm, then retreats to another room to swear, talk to herself, and engage in various obsessive-compulsive behaviors. If she actually seeks treatment, she'll likely lose her job, and Dad is already buried in debt. I don't know how we can find a way out where everyone benefits. I haven't really had a mother for five years; I went through puberty without her because she was never truly "there," and it leaves me feeling absolutely hollow. I want her to get better—more than anything—but I also want my sister and me to hold onto some semblance of hope for a decent future. I'm not writing this for pity; I'm writing this because if anyone—anyone at all—has even a shred of advice on how we can fix this, I would be eternally grateful.
Hmm.
I simply cannot fathom how it wasn't obvious that your mother stopped attending her checkups and quit taking her medication? Was there truly no one looking out for her?
And this happened three years ago!
Your mother isn't going to "get well." You have to accept that reality. She might improve enough to function normally within society, certainly. But to reach even that point, she must take her medications—not because someone is being difficult, but because they are absolutely essential.
Now, instead of both of you sitting there lamenting and weeping, why aren't you looking for actual solutions to this problem? You aren't children anymore. Don't you have partners?
If you do, then you have support.
You aren't in some deep depression, so please, do not take your situation for granted. Both of you are bright students, and there is still plenty of time to build a successful, prosperous life.
Right now, you are under heightened stress and showing signs of anxiety, but you are young; you can fight through this.
Your father lacks the strength, fine... which means you two are the primary, responsible editors of this entire production. Stop relying on something imaginary and take control of the situation. No one else is responsible for anything now except for the two of you—especially when it comes to your own lives.
It isn't your mother's fault that she is ill. I don't understand how she manages to work without issues or medication. Well, regardless, it is better that she is working.
Regarding trichotillomania, there is an excellent thread on this forum. In my opinion, you probably should have been on an antidepressant for a while now, though you didn't mention taking any here.
Is that an official diagnosis from a doctor, or did you diagnose yourself?
There are also fantastic threads regarding schizophrenia with plenty of firsthand accounts, so please, go read them.
