Sexual Dysfunction Discussions

I’d love to know—and feel free to just DM me—where your guy went to see his therapist.

crimsongull20 said:What's your addiction? 🙂

My addiction?! Honestly, I’m sitting here right now trying to actually pin down what my vices are, and I am drawing a total blank on anything that would involve me actually ignoring the people around me! Like, seriously, nothing comes to mind!
I'm really out here trying to be the voice of reason—First Things First!

From what I know, sexual issues usually stem from childhood stuff that messed with someone's development, or maybe if they grew up thinking sex was some taboo or weird thing you just don't talk about...

So, look, if your boyfriend needs to watch porn, it doesn't mean he's broken. But if he's doing it right after you guys have sex and he can't function without it, then yeah, that's a real issue. I guess most things can be worked out through talking, though. Just please, 😁 👍

DreamGirl said:We were watching a movie together the other night... and apparently, his hand was a better choice than me!

In my experience, every man I’ve ever met—or even just heard talking about sex—seems to operate under this mindset where a hand is a perfectly fine substitute when a woman isn't available, yet they still somehow rank women as second best to manual stimulation. To me, that feels like a fundamental issue.🤔

Marilyn Monroe says:
So, we were just hanging out one night watching a movie together... and honestly? He actually liked the film he picked way more than he liked me!

Seriously, this is just wild! Just dump him already!

Coco Chanel said:That’s basically how people justify getting out of bed—to check sports scores or the weather forecast. It’s all just a different flavor of compulsion. Take my aunt, for example; she’s retired and barely leaves her house, yet she turns on the news or grabs the paper at least seven times a day just to see if it's going to rain tomorrow. Then there’s the 27-year-old neighbor who spends ten hours a day glued to a gaming console. I know someone who buys a hundred pairs of nylon stockings every month. My grandmother spends half her life playing Solitaire. Another neighbor lives in his office, pulling fifteen-hour shifts like it's oxygen. Honestly, I'm starting to wonder if anyone actually lives without being tethered to some obsession.

So, what's your vice? 🙂

placidranger: so everyone has an addiction, which means—it's fine??

duckie said:Marilyn Monroe says:
We were watching a movie together the other night... and he actually preferred his own choice over mine!

That’s just awful. Honestly, you should probably just walk away from him.

😬 I mean, the guy is addicted to porn. It's basically the same as being an alcoholic. You shouldn't kid yourself thinking you can change him; it's pretty much incurable...

says: ...based on what she wrote, she’s admitting she struggles with porn addiction, implying she links voyeurism to watching porn—as if she doesn't realize that men do this—all of them. So, according to her, the issue isn't him, but rather that there isn't actually an issue at all; they just have different biological drives between men and women.

First off, I gotta thank my unofficial spokesperson for speaking up for me here. 🙂
All I can say about this whole thing is that I don't equate voyeurism with watching porn; I link it to what it actually is...
How can you possibly claim there isn't an actual problem here?👎
And another flat-out lie from you is that sweeping generalization that "ALL" men do it.

John Price said:It’s not even about faithfulness for him since he's "sleeping with me"—it's all just a "fantasy." We were watching a movie together the other night... and his hand was clearly his preferred choice over me! Then comes the commentary—stuff like, "Man, I wish she was yours..." or "I'd love for others to [redacted] you..." After that, my libido just checked out completely.
I'm not some saint, but sometimes I actually want romance, tenderness, candlelight dinners, sweet words...
Marriage? Forget about it.!! 😢

Hey John Price,
I'm speechless. I am dealing with the EXACT same issue with this guy.
I don't even know where to start or who the crazy one is here—sometimes I wonder if I'm making it all up. Long story short, here's the deal:
He has these insane sexual urges. He'd hit on every single woman he sees on a bus, walking down a sidewalk, or at a local park. When we walk down the street together, he stares at women without any shame, checking them out and even catcalling right in front of me.
Last night, there was this Asian woman on the bus wearing high boots. He literally couldn't take his eyes off her. For twenty minutes straight. She got off at our stop and he instinctively started following her—I was just 😕 😲 feeling incredibly humiliated.
I also notice quite often that the inside of his shirt has traces of semen on it, especially when he shows up late to meet me😲—I can easily guess what he was up to.
Once, while I was in the restroom at a coffee shop, he went over to "chat" with some girl because she was "so hot."
And when we're having sex, he constantly asks things like: "Who were you with?" "Did you sleep with them again?" "Can they do it better than me, or am I still the best?"... or "I want you to dress like a hooker so I can take you out and let everyone stare at you..." It just goes on and on.

Sometimes I'll turn him down because of things he says, and then he just turns aggressive—slapping me, forcing himself on me. Other times, he’ll wake up in the middle of the night and start grabbing at me; it isn't even about the act itself, it's more about his whole attitude and how he carries himself. And the cheating? He does it whenever and wherever he can—honestly, I don't even stress about it anymore.
He actually loves it when I bring a friend over; he’ll flirt and play games with them every single time. Last weekend, I caught him rubbing my friend's leg under the table at a Starbucks.😲
At home, he has dozens of pornographic videos he filmed himself. He’s constantly trying to record or photograph my body—my ass, my legs, whatever—but he has NEVER once asked to take a photo of my face. Real romantic, right?
I also know he's hooking up with his roommate, who is just this disgusting, washed-up girl from London... honestly, I've realized he's an addict. He just has this desperate need to be the center of attention for EVERY woman at the same time. Sometimes I don't even recognize him—the way he acts, that manic energy, the way he stares at women and completely tunes out everything else. There are moments where I look at him and I'm genuinely scared of the person standing in front of me. It's depressing because he doesn't even realize what he's doing. It's not even about the constant infidelity anymore; it's about how OBSESSED he is and how he simply can't stop. And yet, I know he cares—as crazy as that sounds, I think he actually loves me. Because no matter where he goes, he always comes back to me. I know his soul; I know what he's thinking even when he's asleep. But no, his "coming back to me" doesn't impress me. Honestly, I'm just sad and shocked because I could never bring a man like this home. Just imagine if he got wasted in front of my mom and started hitting on my little sister. I'd die of embarrassment. Or if he hooked up with one of my old high school friends?!😲
Please, help me. John Price, I think I understand what's going on with your boyfriend. This is serious—he's not just some voyeur. He's just like my guy. This is a psychological disorder, something much deeper than that.😕. I'm not exactly thrilled about airing my dirty laundry like this, I don't know... please don't laugh at me, just try to understand...

goldenotter3, I’m trying to make sense of this, so you should try too. Your situation isn't quite the same as what John Price is going through. You're being abused—both emotionally and physically (violating you)—and he's only able to get away with it because your self-esteem is in the gutter. What do you think of my take on this?

Just one question:
It happens to me all the time where I get an erection out of nowhere—like, totally for no reason at all. It’s happened during class at school, even just hanging out at home... Is this just a puberty thing since I'm 14, and is there any way to actually stop it from happening?

says: goldenotter3, look, try to meet me halfway here—your situation isn't quite the same as what John Price went through. you're dealing with someone who abuses you both emotionally and physically (including sexual assault), and he's able to get away with it because your self-esteem is basically non-existent. how does that sit with you?

I think I phrased things poorly when I said he forces me. We actually enjoy rougher sex sometimes—you know, things like spanking or light impact play instead of just standard making love. He’s never actually assaulted me, believe me. But even without that, it would be insane if he didn't realize that I'm not always down for the same intensity he is. Sometimes, like John Price says, I just need some actual tenderness.🙄

It doesn't matter how rough your sex life usually is. When you say no, and he turns aggressive, starts slapping you, and rapes you, that is abuse. You can try to rationalize it all you want, but eventually, the consequences will hit you from head to toe.

Everything you’ve written sounds like the classic script and excuses used by abused women. It’s practically a textbook case.