What were your biggest pregnancy surprises and pet peeves?

I have to mention that even before I was pregnant, those constant questions about "so, when are you having a baby?" or "what are you waiting for?" used to drive me absolutely insane.

Now, both my partner and I are deep in the middle of fertility testing and IVF treatments. We’ve been at this forever, and honestly, there isn't a lower point you can hit than this. People can be incredibly insensitive, poking their noses into things that simply aren't any of their business.

Yeah, it’s honestly pretty ugly how that turned out... 😢

Aside from the whole "you'll see when you give birth" nonsense, here’s what really gets under my skin:
That question—"is the baby moving yet?"—I knew it was coming, but it still stings when people ask. And then, when I actually tell them I feel movement, they hit me with, "Oh, you don't feel that, those are just your guts, it's too early." Honestly? Idiots. They think they know more than I do about the tiny life growing inside me. Give me a break.
Then there’s the unsolicited advice like, "It's way too early to start shopping; you should wait until a month before the due date." 🙄 As if I'm going to be strolling through Target with a massive bump and expecting everything to be effortless! When I pushed back, she just doubled down, asking why I even need to go to the store at all since someone else will just pick stuff up for me. 🙂😠 Oh, really? Because I'm sure some random stranger is just dying to pick out bottles and strollers for my firstborn.
And then enters the other one: "Don't buy anything, you'll get everything you need." How exactly does that work? I'd love to know where Santa Claus lives so I can mail him my registry. 🙄
The logic follows that if you didn't know about the baby, you wouldn't need anything—because apparently, the family living in the apartment next door back in the day only needed two thin blankets to cover a newborn. When I heard that, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
There were a few other "geniuses" in the mix, but I can't recall them all right now. All of this—this entire barrage of "wonderful" advice—hit me in a mere 20 minutes yesterday. Just my luck. ☕

Ugh, honestly, whenever I think back on it, I just get this massive wave of anxiety—it’s like a total panic attack waiting to happen. It starts with people telling me, "Don't you dare buy anything yet, it's way too early, you'll just end up with a house full of dust-collectors!" And then comes the unsolicited lecture about how I shouldn't bother buying certain things because "you'll be getting all of that anyway later," or my personal favorite, "Oh, don't buy that size, they'll outgrow it in like, a month, you really don't need it." Like, excuse me? Who exactly are you to tell me what I'm going to buy for my own kid, when, or how much I'm willing to spend? Seriously, if there was an Olympic sport for things that drive me absolutely insane, that condescending unsolicited advice would definitely take the gold medal!

^^ Oh man, how awful!! 😲
Back when I was still in my first trimester, an acquaintance actually asked me, "How are you doing? How's the fetus?" It sounded so incredibly blunt, especially when she followed up with, "Well, it’s not a living baby yet, it’s just a fetus, right?"

And then there's this whole process of buying and organizing everything during the final month of pregnancy... just wonderful! 👍
Because clearly, I'm at my absolute peak of agility and energy right now, bursting with the desire to spend all day wandering through Target or running errands and ironing tiny clothes.. Idiots 🙂
Plus, being told "you'll get everything you need" is a notorious lie.
Nobody actually asks what you need; instead, people just pile up a mountain of useless junk. For example, they'll buy little girls these dresses that barely fit over their heads and have to be awkwardly tied in the back, or little boys sneakers or even tiny tuxedos... it's all adorable, but totally unnecessary.
Or they'll grab size 3-6 months clothing just so they don't buy something too small (which is still a far cry from needing a formal suit in newborn size).
BUT—nobody ever thinks to buy the cloth diapers, the disposables, the baby wash, the swaddles, the cotton pads, the diaper cream, the bottles, or the pacifiers... It's rare for anyone to remember those essentials. That's stuff Mom and Dad have to handle, and it needs to be done while Mom is still physically able to move around.
And just like you said—I really don't want some random people like Peter and Kat deciding things for me; I want to choose things for my own child myself.

@Justin Baker3 — that's exactly why I never ask anyone for anything. You never truly know what someone else is going through or what their situation is. And whenever I hear someone else prying, I make sure to shut them down pretty quickly.
I have a few couples nearby who are trying really hard or who have faced struggles, and I know how difficult that can be. I absolutely loathe those intrusive questions that dig so deeply into someone's private life and can potentially break a heart.
I'm just so happy to hear your little one is finally on the way 😍

shadowfalcon43 said:Ugh, seriously 🙂 🙂that whole "you'll see" line gives me such an allergic reaction!!
Like, what exactly are we supposed to "see"?!?.. I mean... we all wanted to get pregnant... we all wanted to be parents... and yeah, I guess we prepared ourselves for it 🤷
Sure, true, our lives are going to flip upside down in an instant... but this is the life we chose and planned out ourselves!! I can't stand that kind of unsolicited wisdom... once I actually give birth, it'll probably just be, "Oh, just wait until you have TWO kids"🙂🙂

I just have to jump in here!
😂😂😂😂 You hit the nail on the head with this one! I have two kiddos myself now (just became a mom again recently 😁) and I am genuinely curious about what comes after the whole: "you'll see when you have two kids" 🤷...Honestly, it feels like those frustrated geese who just want to feel important ☕so they end up blathering nonsense everywhere!

Justin Baker3 said:So, I’m officially 35 now, and I am getting seriously tired of people asking if I'm "counting down."

I honestly feel like a ticking time bomb with those big green digital numbers flashing ominously...

And don't even get me started on the endless stream of "just wait until you have kids" comments. It makes me want to lose my mind...

It bugs me too. It’s like they act as if your life is just over... especially since I'm planning on having a second child soon.
All that talk about how exhausting it'll be—give me a break. I'm not an idiot; I know what I'm getting into.

It honestly drives me crazy when I run into women who are heavily pregnant or already have kids—you know the type. They give you that look, that condescending little "just you wait" glance, like they’re some kind of seasoned veteran looking down on you...

shadowfalcon43 said:Ugh, seriously 🙂 🙂that whole "you'll see" line gives me such an allergic reaction!!
Like, what exactly are we supposed to "see"?!?.. I mean... we all wanted to get pregnant... we all wanted to be parents... and yeah, I guess we prepared ourselves for it 🤷
Sure, true, our lives are going to flip upside down in an instant... but this is the life we chose and planned out ourselves!! I can't stand that kind of unsolicited wisdom... once I actually give birth, it'll probably just be, "Oh, just wait until you have TWO kids"🙂🙂

I'm right there with you! You choose it, you live it! 😉 That phrase "you'll see how much a child hurts" is one of those things that truly gets under my skin!!! "You'll see when you give birth"—well, I gave birth, and all I see is one beautiful, healthy baby who makes every single day better! Now they've started with the "just wait until the teeth start coming in" routine 🙂 And soon enough I expect to hear "you'll see when they start crawling," or "you'll see when you have two"...!! 😂 It's ridiculous!!

They told me the exact same thing—don't buy anything until the baby is actually born!! WTF?? 😲 Of course I was buying stuff. By my sixth or seventh month, I had almost everything ready for the baby 😍

Terry Taylor53 said:I'm right there with you! You choose it, you live it! 😉 That phrase "you'll see how much a child hurts" is one of those things that truly gets under my skin!!! "You'll see when you give birth"—well, I gave birth, and all I see is one beautiful, healthy baby who makes every single day better! Now they've started with the "just wait until the teeth start coming in" routine 🙂 And soon enough I expect to hear "you'll see when they start crawling," or "you'll see when you have two"...!! 😂 It's ridiculous!!

They told me the exact same thing—don't buy anything until the baby is actually born!! WTF?? 😲 Of course I was buying stuff. By my sixth or seventh month, I had almost everything ready for the baby 😍

I’ve always felt like I could only share these kinds of thoughts with women who have a bit of a mean streak.
Sure, some births are incredibly difficult, but why on earth would you go around telling an expectant mother a horror story, especially when she’s already right on the doorstep?
If someone said that to me, I might actually lose my cool and throw a shoe at them. 😠

Terry Taylor53 said:I'm right there with you! You choose it, you live it! 😉 That phrase "you'll see how much a child hurts" is one of those things that truly gets under my skin!!! "You'll see when you give birth"—well, I gave birth, and all I see is one beautiful, healthy baby who makes every single day better! Now they've started with the "just wait until the teeth start coming in" routine 🙂 And soon enough I expect to hear "you'll see when they start crawling," or "you'll see when you have two"...!! 😂 It's ridiculous!!

They told me the exact same thing—don't buy anything until the baby is actually born!! WTF?? 😲 Of course I was buying stuff. By my sixth or seventh month, I had almost everything ready for the baby 😍

I had the same experience! And now that I’m on my second, everything is already set; I just want to go through the motions of folding all the tiny clothes one more time.
I can't exactly wait until week 39 to start my shopping spree, can I?
🙄
My tomorrow dear is heading out to grab a mountain of diapers, and then we’ll finally be done—we just have to wait for the little nugget to arrive. 😍

Justin Baker3 said:I have to mention that even before I was pregnant, those constant questions about "so, when are you having a baby?" or "what are you waiting for?" used to drive me absolutely insane.

Now, both my partner and I are deep in the middle of fertility testing and IVF treatments. We’ve been at this forever, and honestly, there isn't a lower point you can hit than this. People can be incredibly insensitive, poking their noses into things that simply aren't any of their business.

jadejackal said:Aside from the whole "you'll see when you give birth" nonsense, here’s what really gets under my skin:
That question—"is the baby moving yet?"—I knew it was coming, but it still stings when people ask. And then, when I actually tell them I feel movement, they hit me with, "Oh, you don't feel that, those are just your guts, it's too early." Honestly? Idiots. They think they know more than I do about the tiny life growing inside me. Give me a break.
Then there’s the unsolicited advice like, "It's way too early to start shopping; you should wait until a month before the due date." 🙄 As if I'm going to be strolling through Target with a massive bump and expecting everything to be effortless! When I pushed back, she just doubled down, asking why I even need to go to the store at all since someone else will just pick stuff up for me. 🙂😠 Oh, really? Because I'm sure some random stranger is just dying to pick out bottles and strollers for my firstborn.
And then enters the other one: "Don't buy anything, you'll get everything you need." How exactly does that work? I'd love to know where Santa Claus lives so I can mail him my registry. 🙄
The logic follows that if you didn't know about the baby, you wouldn't need anything—because apparently, the family living in the apartment next door back in the day only needed two thin blankets to cover a newborn. When I heard that, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
There were a few other "geniuses" in the mix, but I can't recall them all right now. All of this—this entire barrage of "wonderful" advice—hit me in a mere 20 minutes yesterday. Just my luck. ☕

🙂 I am signing off on all of this—with enthusiasm. 🙄 I guess I’m just starting—though "starting" might be an overstatement at this point. Tyler Ramos. 🙏

Oh yeah... that’s exactly what drove me crazy during my first pregnancy, and now I'm just driving myself nuts in this one because I can't stop spiraling about how I'm going to manage with two kids on my own.

And honestly... I can't believe my best friend—who knows exactly what kind of situation I'm in and that I definitely can't afford to buy everything brand new for a baby—is just sitting there with a closet full of gender-neutral clothes saying, "Just tell me what you need and let me know." Like, seriously? For the hundredth time, she's offering stuff?! I'm due any day now and nothing has even arrived yet. Well, at least I started prepping on time (unlike some people who wait until the absolute last second to buy anything🙄🙄🙄) so I'm actually ready for the baby to arrive. It’s funny how the people you least expect show up right when you need them—they both surprised me so much during my first pregnancy—while the ones you actually count on? Nothing. I just don't get it...

Andrew Martin89 said:Oh yeah... that’s exactly what drove me crazy during my first pregnancy, and now I'm just driving myself nuts in this one because I can't stop spiraling about how I'm going to manage with two kids on my own.

And honestly... I can't believe my best friend—who knows exactly what kind of situation I'm in and that I definitely can't afford to buy everything brand new for a baby—is just sitting there with a closet full of gender-neutral clothes saying, "Just tell me what you need and let me know." Like, seriously? For the hundredth time, she's offering stuff?! I'm due any day now and nothing has even arrived yet. Well, at least I started prepping on time (unlike some people who wait until the absolute last second to buy anything🙄🙄🙄) so I'm actually ready for the baby to arrive. It’s funny how the people you least expect show up right when you need them—they both surprised me so much during my first pregnancy—while the ones you actually count on? Nothing. I just don't get it...

If it helps, I am in the exact same boat. My best friend has a ten-month-old boy—same gender, too—and she gave birth around the same time of year as I am. She hasn't offered a single thing. What makes it worse is that she's a single mom, and her dad used to give the kid plenty of $33 for ice cream all the time. 🙄 The absolute peak of absurdity happened yesterday when we were driving to Trieste; she tells me mid-trip not to bother buying a high chair because she'll sell me hers for half price. 🙄

Here’s a fresh example from yesterday: I was standing in line at Target, and there was nobody behind me, just two women ahead of me finishing up their checkout. Suddenly, this woman just smoothly slides right between me and them, acting like she’s next in line.

Honestly, I had to fight the urge to lose my cool completely. First off, I was clearly the only one waiting in line. Secondly, you can't exactly mistake me for being pregnant—I have a bump. I just don't understand people who blatantly pretend they're blind. I also don't get the cashier, who saw I was pregnant and couldn't even find the nerve to tell that lady to back off and let me go first.

I swear, once I actually have this baby, I’m going to be pushing that stroller right through anyone in my way. My patience for this stuff is officially gone.

Justin Baker3 said:Here’s a fresh example from yesterday: I was standing in line at Target, and there was nobody behind me, just two women ahead of me finishing up their checkout. Suddenly, this woman just smoothly slides right between me and them, acting like she’s next in line.

Honestly, I had to fight the urge to lose my cool completely. First off, I was clearly the only one waiting in line. Secondly, you can't exactly mistake me for being pregnant—I have a bump. I just don't understand people who blatantly pretend they're blind. I also don't get the cashier, who saw I was pregnant and couldn't even find the nerve to tell that lady to back off and let me go first.

I swear, once I actually have this baby, I’m going to be pushing that stroller right through anyone in my way. My patience for this stuff is officially gone.

I definitely would've said something—I'd have made a scene for both the woman and the cashier. And that isn't even about hormones; I'd have done it regardless. 😛

It’s frustrating because I went out and bought a massive annual supply of tampons right before I got pregnant. With my first kid, my period didn't even return until ten months later. 🙄

But hey, at least I have enough tampons to start an export business. 🤦

Sometimes I’m not the type to make a scene. Instead, I just sit there and vent internally. I know, I’m pretty foolish when it comes to stuff like that.

The sinus pressure and stuffed nose are driving me crazy..
The coughing is getting out of hand; my chest actually hurts now.
And I can't even take any Aspirin C, because if it wasn't for all this...

You have to keep your distance from animals just so you don't pick up some random bacteria.

🙂

I’ve had my dog for six years now, and it never even crosses my mind to avoid petting him, taking him for walks, or acting like he doesn't exist. Seriously, what am I actually going to get if I just hang out with my own dog???

🙂🙂

hiddenscout362 said:You have to keep your distance from animals just so you don't pick up some random bacteria.

🙂

I’ve had my dog for six years now, and it never even crosses my mind to avoid petting him, taking him for walks, or acting like he doesn't exist. Seriously, what am I actually going to get if I just hang out with my own dog???

🙂🙂

I sleep with mine—he's a 130-pound beast. 😁 And no, the thought of ignoring him or avoiding him hasn't even entered my head.