hollowmoose77 said:I have a child. My child has had an ADHD diagnosis since preschool age, so for about 10 years now.
I don't write much, I just don't have the time (a hyperactive child is a handful, seriously, they are truly hyperactive), and I wouldn't have even stepped in if I hadn't ended up crying my eyes out last night. I've been reading this forum for years for the same reason I watch things like *Two and a Half Men*... just to have a laugh when I'm in that kind of mood, and it never occurred to me to get seriously involved in a debate because I knew it would end... well, bitterly, in any case. Because sometimes people overdo it, actually quite often, and then I just go off and read about cosmetics; at least there I'm not thinking about things that make me want to cry. Last night I wasn't even reading about cosmetics, I was just so upset, because my life isn't hard because my kid is hyper, it's hard because people have such "unique ways" of expressing themselves and behaving.
That's why it made me happy today (and believe me, that isn't easy) to come across this topic, because it makes me happy every time I see there are still people who understand that being hyperactive isn't the same as being poorly behaved, that physical punishment didn't just fall from the sky, and that they have the strength to open these topics on the forum (I didn't have that strength yesterday; my child had a really bad day). The problem with this thread, besides the "mild" suggestion of physical punishment, is that you don't actually understand what hyperactivity really is; instead, you grab onto something and frustratingly take it to an absurd extreme. Which is also what happens when you bring feminism into it, but here we are talking about—and I'll be brief just so I can make it somewhat clear to you—a medical condition.
In the last 13 or so years, I have hit my hyperactive child exactly five times... I regret every single one of those five times, and I will never regret it. And if it had worked, I'd probably regret it even more. But it didn't. IT DIDN'T. It was just proof of my complete helplessness in that moment.
When you have a child one day and realize (or others, like doctors, realize) that they are hyperactive, I am available for anything... and I truly mean this, you are going to need every bit of support you can get.
If you'll let me say it, I feel for you. If we were chatting on a different forum or grabbing a drink in person, believe me, I wouldn't be making any crude jokes or being an asshole about it.
But look, the guys' lounge isn't the place to talk about kids with ADHD. Even mentioning hiperaktivan in the original post didn't really trigger a debate about that; it wasn't the point.
To me, the whole thing—and in your case, specifically—is about how people handle rude, ill-mannered kids. Laypeople see a kid acting out and call them hiperaktivan, when really they're just being bratty.
And then you get those comments from the guys in the lounge. That's all there is to it.
In your situation, you can't expect a "rational" discussion there. The whole point of this specific subforum is something everyone needs to grasp or just accept.
Don't take those posts to heart. If this group had moved the conversation to a more appropriate forum, it would have gone a completely different way.
If someone had brought that kind of nonsense to a thread where actual discussion was expected, I wouldn't have said a word.
It's honestly pathetic that admin even considered handing out warnings... it shouldn't have even reached that point. But hey, there's always someone lurking, just waiting to target poor MK members. 😁
Like that mention of the atomic bomb—I mean, who'd actually pull a nuclear option at a parade? 🤣, I think we all agreed that wasn't the smartest move. 😬