There are a million different ways to show someone you care, just like there are a million types of hugs, right? Personally, I’m all about that move where you just rest your cheek against 😍, but let’s be real—that’s strictly reserved for my inner circle.
Not every hug carries the same weight or hits the same level of intimacy, either. And honestly, our emotions aren't always dialed up to the same intensity every single time...
As long as there are people, there'll be romance...
Honestly, trying to have a serious debate about these subjective, ill-defined concepts is a total trap... you usually just end up in some pointless shouting match over personal tastes and who has "good" style, which is honestly such a waste of breath. One person lives for kale, someone else is all about broccoli, and then there’s that guy who can't even look at a green vegetable without gagging... so what? It is what it is. 😁
Take me, for example—I can't stand those massive, sugary gestures or public proposals that feel totally staged and forced, whereas one of my girlfriends absolutely loses it for that stuff and thinks it's peak romance. We haven't come to blows yet, though. 😁
PS I can't stand the word "partner" when talking about any kind of relationship, even if it is technically convenient sometimes. ☕
I wasn't sure where to host this thread, but whoever is free to chime in and has an opinion on this topic will find it.
I’m seeing more and more people—barring a few exceptions—becoming incredibly rude to one another. It isn't just about how others act, though; it's about my relationship with them. Or rather, their relationship with me. It feels stupid to talk about myself or brag, but I don't think I'm a bad person. I'm just noticing that kindness isn't valued much these days, and as I get older, I can tell that being a good person has only cost me.
I’ve posted here before during periods where I was feeling really depressed, constantly searching for some deep-seated reason for my sadness. The truth? It's the loneliness. It's literally killing me day by day.
It sounds silly, but over time I've just lost interest in people. I don't have the energy anymore to "get over broken connections" or try to fix pieces of myself that other people shattered. Same goes for dating—I went from searching persistently to nothing at all. I've completely withdrawn.
Anyway, the point of all this is that I have very few people in my life who actually care about me. Everyone else is either using me for something or treating me poorly—and I tend to tolerate it until I finally snap. I'm always the backup plan, or someone is trying to set me up with someone they think I'll like. There are so few people who will actually call just to ask how I am.
And every single day, I just feel lonelier and lonelier. What’s your general take on this? Have we really become a society of wolves? Why do people take me for granted? And if I have to, what do I need to change about myself to make things better? I probably already know what you'd say to all of this, but I'm asking for your thoughts and advice anyway. 😉
That’s what happens when you constantly crush your own ego and try to live as pure altruism, thinking your life's mission is just to be a "good person" and help everyone else... when the reality is you have to fight for yourself first. You take care of *you*, and then, if there’s anything left, you take care of others. Advice? Focus on yourself. Work on your self-esteem. Be blunt and assertive when you speak. Set boundaries, and the second you see someone stepping over them—react. There’s more to it, obviously. Just realize that nothing changes overnight; these shifts happen gradually until the new behavior becomes second nature. Most importantly, you have to kill the victim mindset. Take control. Stop being passive—you need action. Don't sit around waiting for someone to call and check on you; be the one making the calls! And yeah, you're right, sometimes people really are wolves to one another... but there’s something much worse than that: being your own worst enemy.
Just remember, the world is a mirror—how you present yourself is exactly how others will see you. And treat you.
Haha, thanks. Honestly, I can't even say that was my intention—it just kind of happened that way. 🙂
@Edward Hughes3, I really hope you didn't regret going and that it wasn't a total waste of time. It didn't surprise me one bit that it was an ad; I was honestly wondering what the catch was. ☕
Look, there’s a correlation, sure, but one doesn't necessarily dictate the other. Obviously, if you don't deal with anxiety, this probably won't mean squat to you. Personally, I struggle with it, so that was my main focus at first, though there are plenty of other factors in the mix. If nobody here actually cares about this stuff, then why am I even bothering? 🙂 If I decide to head out, I'll check back in to let you guys know how it went and what else I picked up regarding hypersensitivity 🙂
Sarah Ross21 said:You probably need to find some kind of middle ground—learn how to step back into your own shoes first, then eventually lean toward the other person, but using logic instead of just raw emotion.
I was under so much stress yesterday that I could actually feel my "emotional immunity" bottoming out... I don't know.
For sure, but I’m worried that if someone wants to actually reset, they have to completely ditch those old patterns that keep dragging them back into the same mental loops for a while. You kind of have to experience both extremes to find any sense of balance... Or maybe I’m just tripping. Anyway, I found this free 🎉 "High sensitivity and anxiety" webinar, but I’m low-key terrified to sign up because they might make me turn on my camera and actually talk. I have no clue what the vibe will be like, so I'm feeling pretty anxious about it. If anyone actually has the guts 😁 to join, let me know and I can send over the link.
And ladies, trust me, you are definitely not alone in this. Fingers crossed 🙂
Sarah Ross21 said:I heard some psychotherapist arguing that people like that need to learn how to "get back into their own shoes"—basically stop obsessing over everyone else's perspective. I don't know. Maybe. But if we all just focus on our own damn selves, where does it end? That's exactly why we have global warming in the first place...
Man, this is actually pretty deep. I honestly think there’s a link between those two things and there might be a way to work through it, but you hit the nail on the head... is it even worth stripping away a part of yourself—one that I personally find useful and positive—just to chase some kind of emotional stability?
I feel seen. Like, I really do. It’s just how you’re wired—it’s in your DNA from day one until the day you kick the bucket—but look, there actually are ways to handle it... so here’s the deal: -surround yourself with actual decent people, high-quality humans who "recharge your batteries." Since you basically soak up everything like a sponge—every emotion, every weird vibe in the air, all of it—it is absolutely vital to watch your environment. If a situation is toxic for your body or your head, you gotta get the hell out of there. -eat actual food and stay balanced. Avoid the booze, skip the drugs, and stop living off pure sugar... seriously, you just can't take it. -meditate, spend time out in the wild, and actually move your body, like going for a hike in the Rockies. -make time for yourself to just "reset"—honestly, this might be the most important thing on the list. -read books about this stuff and actually put in the work to learn who you are. -think hard about your boundaries with other people. You have to learn how to recognize what you should give and what you can handle before it turns into someone else just using you. -sometimes you just gotta be a little bit of an asshole, you know? Stand your ground when you need to instead of waiting until you eventually blow a fuse. ...
Dammit, I just finished typing out this whole damn post and the thread just vanished into thin air. 😢 OP, look, I’ve said my piece and laid everything out on the table, so you’ve read it all now, and honestly? All I can do is wish you luck at this point. 🙂
Look, my advice? Just pick a couple of tiny things to knock out every single day—stuff that doesn't take much effort and won't drain you. Like, just ten minutes of stretching, tossing the dishes in the dishwasher, or some other little chore.
Once you’ve checked those off, then you can go ahead and do whatever you actually feel like doing. Try sticking to this routine daily, and eventually, you can start scaling up the difficulty or the time you spend on it.
It isn't going to eat up your whole day, but honestly, you're gonna feel way more productive and just better overall—trust me, I've been there. 😉