What was my absolute biggest headache during pregnancy?! PREGNANCY!!
First, I dealt with a hematoma. Then came the nausea and constant burping. On top of that, I tested positive for E. coli in a urine culture and had to go on antibiotics. Just when we hit the second trimester and I thought, "Okay, maybe now I can actually relax," my husband ended up needing surgery—so much for avoiding unexpected stress. Once that passed, my blood pressure started dropping way too low. And now, being in the third trimester... well, it's just non-stop movements and twitches. I'm on strict bed rest, and even moving an inch feels like a marathon. My glucose test also flagged gestational diabetes. I’m handing in another urine sample tomorrow, and honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if they found an elephant in there.🤷 I mean, I really wouldn't.
I have this feeling that every single possible complication in pregnancy decided to target me specifically.
Jose White18 said:You don't actually mean we should put a warning about sanctions in the intro post of every single thread, do you? That’s already covered in the general forum rules—chat isn't allowed unless it's explicitly permitted.
Another thing is that discipline on Red Bull had slipped a bit, so things became weirdly casual...
Well, that’s not quite what I meant. I was talking about those few "critical" threads—the ones that are actually useful and necessary—that kept getting shut down. For those specific cases, I thought it might be better to open them up with a disclaimer right in the first post.
Besides, that’s just standard practice across the entire forum for problematic topics; it's not something I just made up.
It doesn't really matter much now, though, since I see the threads I was specifically referring to have been reopened, and they do include a warning in the first post. 👍
hollowtrucker77 said:You can't exactly moderate a thread once it has spiraled completely out of control and gone straight to hell The only real solution at that point is to just cut your losses, start a fresh thread, and try to moderate it properly from the jump Of course, that obviously requires everyone to actually show some self-discipline and help out where they can
I agree! That basal measurement thread was probably going to hit 10k posts anyway if they hadn't locked it down. Let’s just start fresh—maybe we should clarify in the intro that any off-topic chatter will be sanctioned. It ought to work... and hopefully, the same goes for the twins over at Red Bull!
hollowtrucker77 said:just imagine a mom trying to handle three kids at once!! or, does anyone else feel like moms deal with some weirdly specific anxiety regarding their kids' hair color or if they're thinning out too much? come on people, let's dial back the melodrama and bring this down to a reasonable level this constant chatting and "vibing" really isn't what this forum is built for
hollowtrucker77, I think you're overreacting. We even have a separate thread for multiple pregnancies, and it isn't just a chat room or locked away. Raising twins, triplets, etc., is actually a very specific situation. The topic itself isn't the issue—it makes sense. The issue is the lack of moderation! Please don't lock threads that are genuinely needed; just moderate them more strictly instead.
Well, since I’ve already started talking, may I offer one suggestion?
I feel like some of the threads that were locked or moved to the off topic section were dismissed a bit too quickly.
Specifically, the thread about basal measurement. It’s such an expansive topic—everything from types of thermometers to timing, plus all the essentials regarding graphing and symptom tracking... For many women, myself included, that thread was instrumental in helping us achieve pregnancy. It provided information I just couldn't gather from the casual chat threads. Yes, over time, it did turn into a place for random chatter and commenting on every single graph during meaningless days of the cycle.But I think the best solution would be to clear out the off topic stuff... actually, maybe not even clean it, but simply open a new thread with stricter moderation (no random chatter or non-constructive posts). What’s the issue with those chat threads? It’s that they get cluttered with posts about recipes, terrible husbands, and even worse mothers-in-law😁 instead of weather forecasts and everything else. On those kinds of threads, constructive posts don't just go unnoticed; they sink so fast they become pointless. And monitoring basal temperature is definitely a constructive thing! It’s far more constructive than topics like "trying to conceive" or "what annoyed us during pregnancy." We can vent about those things in the chat groups, but basal tracking really deserves its own dedicated space.
The same goes for the twins thread on RiD. That isn't just some niche interest group for parents; it’s a group of mothers with vastly different problems, needs, and questions that you can't just cram into a TZ or an off topic section. I think the smartest move would be to moderate that thread more strictly so it doesn't get buried under trivialities. Otherwise, by that logic, we might as well ask what the point of a thread on infertility is—they could just look for answers in other threads. It’s the same with separate threads for two, three, or more years of experience; some moms will just end up swapping stories in the TZ.🤷
Look, I get it. Things are chaotic right now, and there is clearly a ton of cleanup work to do... But please, please don't immediately judge every thread that started out high-quality and constructive—even if it eventually spiraled—by locking it or tossing it into the off topic section. And especially don't push people toward the chat threads, because people talk about everything there *except* parenting and pregnancy issues.😁 (I'm not saying I don't love the chat threads, I just can't help myself 😁 ))
rustydrifter10 said:Look, those posts were made right after a warning was issued that explicitly stated this kind of talk is off-limits and would result in a ban, so nobody can really play the "I didn't know" card.
I get why it feels harsh to you, I really do, but just take a look at how many warnings have been posted on this thread over the last couple of days and how many formal reprimands we've seen. What’s even the point of handing out warnings if they’re just words on a screen that nobody actually enforces?
Since the official notice is tucked away on the very last page, I highly doubt the girls are going to stumble upon it first thing tomorrow morning.
Well, that’s exactly my point—it was mentioned right in the thread topic, which is growing at a crazy pace. A lot of women have their settings adjusted to show only a few posts per page, so things just sink to the bottom way too fast. The older stuff ends up getting ignored. I guess maybe two or three people catch the warning, while everyone else is left completely in the dark. If someone drops another 5 or 6 posts on the TZ tomorrow morning, I guess we’ll just end up right back where we started—same old story.
I mean—it probably doesn't exactly make your life easier when people are constantly spamming and getting banned, especially when there's already so much content that needs cleaning up and organizing. 🤷 I guess it might actually be helpful to have one major pinned thread—maybe even with a heads-up about the new rules—to keep things organized. It would probably make life a bit easier for you guys on the mod team, and honestly, for us members too. Unless there’s some other reason, I guess nobody can really claim they missed it—mostly because they just aren't keeping up with the thread history. 😉
rustydrifter10 said:Look, bans aren't being handed out over petty nonsense; they're happening because people are straight-up breaking the forum rules. The fact that nobody was getting disciplined for it until now is a completely different story. All those closed or moved threads were just unnecessary clutter—mostly random chat topics—and honestly, you've been seeing warnings scattered all over Red Bull for days now on just about every thread.
In the beginning, we were just giving gentle reminders. Then we moved to deleting posts followed by warnings, then came the yellow cards and extra cautions, and now? Now it’s time for the red cards and full bans. It's just the natural order of things when rules get ignored, but I guess you guys haven't really seen it in action before because we weren't strictly enforcing it.
And let me be clear: more changes are coming, just like we said. The old way of doing things simply isn't sustainable for Red Bull anymore. We realize it feels different to you, but the same standards apply to the rest of the forum, and it's high time they applied to your section too.
Well, I don't think that's quite right—I've seen it happening in various sub-forums, and not just in the chat threads. You see questions like "why was xy banned?" or comments saying "xy, come back soon," and those posts weren't being carded or sanctioned as "commenting on moderator actions."
But today, it's actually because of those exact types of questions that a few people in the pregnancy group got banned. It's a chat thread where it's always the same group of people, and tomorrow, when the women who weren't here today show up after the weekend, they'll probably ask, "why is half our group banned?" and get banned themselves, just like everyone else.
Honestly, it feels a bit harsh. And it doesn't seem fair to suddenly start punishing the female users so rigorously for breaking rules, when, I guess, part of the blame lies with the people who weren't enforcing those rules in the first place, which is how Red Bull turned into what it is now...
I realize that RiD hasn't exactly been perfectly moderated for a long time while working alongside the Pregnancy forums, and things have kind of piled up. it seems like there are just endless clusters of chat rooms and various topics everywhere.
but I really wanted to point out to the leadership that things have gone a bit too far—maybe a little too aggressive when it comes to targeting people's personal discussions regarding hormones 😁
you could have announced a general cleanup in a pinned thread, which probably would have prevented all this massive dissatisfaction. so many bans have gone out lately just for "commenting on moderator actions" in chat rooms that haven't been moderated for months—rooms where people were saying just about anything without any consequences—and now suddenly everything is exploding, even over simple questions like "what happened to that girl whose username turned gray?"
I’m appealing once more—could you at least put a warning in a pinned thread? Because if this keeps up, half the forum might end up banned tomorrow just because users go into the chat rooms asking what's going on 😢 since the warnings mods leave directly on the chat threads get buried, and people just don't read the old messages, making those warnings pretty much pointless.
The thread isn't getting cluttered because of the so-called chat or people waiting on beta results—it's cluttered because we're trying to cram an entire universe of topics into one single spot.
Every clinic, every procedure, every diagnosis—they're all different. And the stream of information just never stops. a there is only one single MPO thread where all of this is being discussed.
Even if that thread were strictly moderated and every "off" comment about someone's procedure results was deleted, the thread would still be impossible to navigate.
The answer isn't deleting posts about procedure outcomes; instead, we should probably look at opening an MPO subforum or allowing new MPO threads to be created. For example, could there be a thread for MPO abroad? Or a separate thread for medications used during the process? And so on, etc.
It turns out that women dealing with conception issues don't really fit into the pregnancy subforum or the women's health subforum either.🤷
They just end up in off. In my opinion, none of this is actually a solution. At this rate, half the forum will eventually migrate exclusively to off.
And while we’re talking about random off-topic chatter and piling up posts like "Douglas Booth22, Frank, this and that," we really should have started with the mountain of other topics. Like the 35+ countdown—imagine what that thread will become once there's a dedicated chat for pregnant women. Why are the "finalists" treated as special? Or what happens to the threads for every woman who goes into labor when they just get filled with "vibrators"? (Since we already have a "baby is born" thread, right?) Or what about the thread for announcing a plus? (We already have the thread with tickers and due dates, right?)
And it just goes on like that forever.
The point? The MPO thread is the ONLY place where women struggling to conceive can actually post. And I guess waiting for procedure results isn't even off-topic.🤷
I should also mention—I think it was maybe a year or two ago—that there was actually a request posted here asking for a dedicated sub-forum specifically for MPO. The suggestion was shot down because they felt a separate sub-forum wasn't necessary and that the existing MPO thread was more than enough for everything.
Now, they’re trying to shrink that very same thread down to almost nothing, so I totally get why these women are so frustrated. Since the government and local authorities aren't listening to them, the one little corner of the Pregnancy sub-forum where these women could actually participate and discuss their very real issues is being turned into a joke.
The scope of MPO is huge—almost everyone involved is dealing with different diagnoses—so naturally, the thread fills up fast and can start to feel like a chat. But it isn't a chat. Sharing information about someone's IVF journey is data regarding the medical procedure itself, not just idle chatter!!
I had my run-in with the healthcare system and their total lack of organization today...
At my last checkup, my OBGYN sent me off for blood work, a urine sample, and an OGTT. Since there’s a lab right inside my local Department of Justice facility that handles OGTT tests, he told me—since my referral was already sitting in their computer system—that I could just show up in the morning after fasting for 12 hours, and they’d send the results straight to him.
So, naturally... I followed those instructions perfectly this time. I figured I’d get everything done about a week before my next appointment on June 14th so the results would be "fresh" when I see him (though, honestly, I kept putting it off because the thought of being without food for over 14 hours makes me feel a bit dizzy 😲).
Anyway, I stopped eating at 7:00 PM last night. Then, at 7:00 AM this morning, I’m standing outside the lab like a total overachiever, handing over my paperwork...
Only for the woman at the counter to hand it right back to me. She says I have to make an appointment for the OGTT. Great. So my doctor didn't know that? And what about the blood and urine tests? "No, no, you have to call and schedule those after 11:00 AM."
Just wonderful. A completely wasted trip to the Department of Justice.
I called them, and the earliest they can see me is July 5th. 😲
I mean, seriously, couldn't they have just taken the blood and urine samples while I was already standing there?! I am genuinely curious to see what my doctor is going to say next week when I show up without having done any of this... I just don't get how everyone within the same Department of Justice facility can be so disconnected and uninformed. It’s not like I’m the first pregnant patient he’s sent for an OGTT; surely he knows the protocol. Unless, of course, I'm just some special case where they decided to implement this annoying appointment rule just a few days ago 🙄
Ronald Williams9 said:I am honestly so fed up with the people working for Verizon and T-Mobile. They constantly harass me every time I step out of a Target or a local grocery store... or whatever shop I happen to be at.
Look, I get it—they’re just trying to make a buck. But if I’ve already made it clear I’m not interested, just leave me alone.
this was annoying me even before I was pregnant. Same goes for those phone telemarketers, financial advisors, and all that other nonsense where they just won't let you be until you basically tell them to get lost. One guy from a financial firm actually harassed me for weeks over the phone. He kept calling from different numbers once he realized I was dodging his initial calls (since he figured out I was ignoring him). I honestly hate these kinds of jobs, and I hate the capitalism that created them. I guess I just can't bring myself to feel bad for the people doing it—I’d much rather go work as a janitor or an office clerk than grab someone by the sleeve and harass them trying to sell them something useless.🙄
yeah, and remember when we used to think those flyer guys on the street corners were irritating?..
Ah, husbands. Honestly, even my own guy was baffled by how nauseous and miserable I felt so early on—he was actually pretty annoyed that Gin had put a veto on sex, especially since now I’m suddenly craving a greasy burger from Shake Shack... but, I guess he totally missed the mark 😁 Now he finally remembers to pick up some salty bagels for me without me having to remind him—it’s pure cat litter, honestly, he won't even let the cats get near his stomach 🤣 Though, I suspect all that brain fog really kicked in after he got shut down by those two young fathers regarding certain matters 😁 He thought I was just making things up or reading too much into everything 😁 But once a man told him that all of this is perfectly normal, he finally settled down with it 😍
Linda Ward312 said:I totally lost my cool today 😠 at this family reunion where—of course—the main topic was pregnancy. This one lady starts questioning why we pregnant women need so many checkups, acting like she knows someone who’s being sent for an OGTT and wondering what on earth the point is, or why I even bother with ultrasounds... just the usual nonsense. She basically thinks because back in her day, like 20 years ago, they didn't go to any doctors and just showed up to give birth, we should be doing the same. 🙄 It gets even more ridiculous, though, because she’s actually telling her own daughter to wait longer to have sex and that there's no reason to see an OBGYN since a woman should just "know" by her symptoms if something is wrong, and why bother with an annual Pap smear 🙄 in the first place. She hasn't even seen a doctor in 12 years... honestly, it's just depressing.
I actually witnessed a nearly identical scenario yesterday 🤣
Honestly, I'm already over it—now I can just laugh about it. 😁
Eric Fowler3, regarding the whole rabbit situation—everyone's already on us, but seriously, everyone is asking what we’re supposed to do about the cats once 😠
Up until now, I've been explaining how everything is going to work out—and reassuring people that our cats aren't some kind of serial killers. From here on out, I might just start telling them that they won't just be sharing the crib, my pillows, and my favorite sweater when we bring the baby home—I'll probably be dressing them up for family photos too. 😁 I mean, I'm half-joking, but I might actually start answering like that with a totally straight face. I'm half-expecting Child Protective Services to show up at my door any minute now. ☕
So, I’m officially, very early pregnant 😍—but honestly, the comments are already getting under my skin—mostly from family, too—about how things "used to be done" or how they handled their own kids back in the day. I mean, I’m only five weeks along and I’m already getting "advice" claiming that breastfeeding isn't enough once a baby hits three months. 😲
I would honestly give all the money I have right now to have someone install a chip in my brain—one ear in, one ear out—because I don't think I'll ever learn how to tune this stuff out on my own. 🙄
If they're starting this much now, goodness knows what happens after the baby actually arrives. 😲
Oh, and yeah, people around me constantly point out that I'm "too informed" or that I "read too much." 🤷 Great, so I guess I should just stay miserable and blindly accept advice that is, well, at least 20 years outdated? Because apparently, it's "stupid" to follow the modern medical consensus that breastfeeding is perfectly sufficient for a three-month-old. 🙄 I have no idea why anyone thinks that's even worth mentioning. 😠
I’m almost looking forward to when the hormones really kick in, so maybe then I can finally learn how to snap back at these comments without feeling guilty about it. 😁 ☕
Sarah Jackson8 said:Here’s what really gets under my skin: my husband and I have pets—specifically African crested geckos—and every single time we see someone, there’s always some busybody asking when we’re finally gonna get rid of them.. I honestly don't even know how to explain it, but I am so allergic to that kind of mindset. It’s like they think animals are just pieces of furniture you can toss out the second you get bored with them!!! 😠😠😠 But I absolutely adore them more than anything!!! 😍
And on top of that, people are constantly trying to suggest names for them. It's mostly my husband, since he’s stuck on those old-school family names that have been passed down for generations... 😠
And ETA, tell your friends to go jump in a lake or something, because I seriously cannot believe anyone would say something so insensitive to you!! As for your husband, trust me, you are 100000000% more precious to him than any name suggestion ever could be!! 😉 😘
Yeah, this pet thing 😠 We have two cats. Just regular, healthy house cats. And people have been asking us—long before we even started thinking about having kids—what we’re going to do with the cats once we have a baby 😲 Like, what am I supposed to do with them?! Nothing! Just make sure they don't wander into the bedroom where the crib and everything else will be. Though, by the way, they haven't had access to the bedroom for ages anyway 🙄 It's like they're serial killers or something, man
Look, star, my memory is a bit fuzzy—this goes back to when my girlfriends were all on the pill and I’d spend my time obsessively reading the fine print. I remember there being a huge distinction based on which specific pill you missed—like, which day of the cycle you were on—because they weren't all equally critical. And if I recall correctly, it said taking a missed pill within a 12-hour window was generally fine.
I mean, I think—it was a long time ago, anyway—and I'm honestly not sure if every single brand works on that same principle these days.
First off, the smartest move would be to just sit down and read the instructions thoroughly. And second, if you're feeling really anxious about it, maybe just head over to see Dr. Miller and have a real conversation with him about the missed dose.
Olivia Sullivan68 said:Hi back to you... look, here is a link where you can get a rough estimate of when ovulation happens... I don't think it's 100% foolproof, but it'll give you a ballpark idea... http://www.mayoclinic.org/ovulation-tracking ...there is also that whole thing with tracking your basal body temperature and keeping a chart... basically, you take your temp every single morning from the start of your cycle and log it... (once you hit ovulation, your temp should jump up from its lowest point)... you'd have to do this for a few months—which might be too long for some people ☕—and then you can look at the graph to see when your temp peaks, which signals ovulation...😁
...plus, there are ovulation predictor kits, and then there's Maybe Baby, or even those little microscopes where you can check your saliva to spot the fertile window... they go for about $30 or so... ...that's pretty much my area of expertise... 😍...otherwise, I wouldn't even know what I was talking about...
Actually, that isn't quite right. Basal body temperature only starts rising AFTER ovulation has already happened. So, by the time you see that jump, ovulation has likely already passed, meaning you're entering your infertile window. That said, it’s probably most reliable to keep tracking after that first spike, since it takes about three consecutive high temperatures to confirm ovulation occurred (which is how the charts on Fertility apps typically log it).
In any case, regarding the OP's questions about fertile versus infertile days, I’d suggest she spend some time looking through the Fertility resources online; it would probably make everything much clearer.