Support resources for families dealing with cancer and other serious illnesses

Melissa Parker37 said:I'm with you on this!

I haven't really had the energy to post lately because everything just kind of crushed me. Sometimes I wonder why life has to be such a jerk. My dad's been in the hospital for a week now. The cancer spread to his brain, liver, kidneys... it's bad. Really, really bad. His left side is paralyzed, he's struggling to talk, and he gets disoriented.
The whole situation is heavy enough on its own, but before we got him settled into the hospital, I can't even begin to tell you what we dealt with back in Manhattan from those doctors—or rather, the people who shouldn't even be allowed to wear scrubs. It’s too painful to talk about right now... maybe one day... (once I've had my fill of suing shady doctors). Thank God we finally ran into a "real" oncologist who actually stepped up for him and pushed for inpatient care.
You only get one life, no matter how messy it gets. Mine feels like the best one because I had a father that a lot of people never get. He shaped me into the person he knew I could be. He poured everything he had into teaching me right from wrong. Dad, I love you!

You're lucky to have such an amazing dad, and he's definitely got the best daughter on the planet!
Thinking about saying goodbye is just brutal. Honestly, I'm scared to even let the thought cross my mind. No matter how much you know the reality of the illness, the outcome, or the end... I don't think anyone ever truly prepares for that kind of pain.
Stay strong and soak up every single second you can with him. Don't let the fear of losing him take over; try to let those moments be nothing but pure love.

Donna Chase said:Have you checked your thyroid?
Fatigue and weight loss can be thyroid issues, like hyperthyroidism. I dealt with that about 10 years ago. I still deal with my thyroid, but people say it's one of the easier chronic things to manage.
Best,

The doctors checked EVERYTHING endocrine-wise... I'm basically the picture of health...
just dealing with some harmless Candida 😳, maybe... lost another 1.3 lbs yesterday.

goldenharbor42 said:They ran every single endocrine test imaginable... I’m as healthy as can be...
just an innocent bystander 😳, perhaps in their eyes... and I actually dropped another 0.6 kg yesterday.

Look, if your T3, T4, and TSH levels are all within the normal range, then we have to look at the bigger picture; those numbers are the primary indicators when it comes to thyroid function.
I remember meeting a friend once at a specialized clinic in Chicago—she was so incredibly thin I barely recognized her. My first instinct was to assume she was suffering from hyperthyroidism, but it turned out her weight loss was actually driven by deep depression.
If that is what you are navigating right now, you really have to find that inner reservoir of strength to keep pushing forward.
You already have your "why"—it's your child. You mentioned feeling like you have no support system, which is a heavy burden to carry, but I wonder if there might be someone in your wider circle, even just a neighbor or an acquaintance, who could offer a hand.
When you take a step back and look at everything you've survived, you realize that many things that felt like absolute catastrophes at the time have faded into distant memories. So, please, try to gather your courage, surround yourself with positive energy, and seek out people who lift you up. I've seen so many people find profound peace through faith, completely transforming their lives for the better. There are even short spiritual retreats that can yield incredible results. I am truly wishing you nothing but the very best.
Best,

Hey everyone—I know I tend to drop in out of nowhere every once in a while.😁
Has anyone seen Sjebana lately? It’s been a minute since she was around here...

Ashley Bishop32 said:Hey everyone, I know I tend to drop in out of nowhere every once in a while😁
Has anyone seen Sjebana lately? It feels like ages since she was active here...

She hasn't posted since last year. Honestly, I'm starting to worry about her.😢

Donna Chase said:So, if your T3, T4, and TSH levels are all fine, I don't want to overstep, but those are basically the gold standard for thyroid stuff.
I once ran into a friend at a specialized clinic who had lost so much weight I barely recognized her. I was sure it was hyperthyroidism, but turns out she was just dealing with depression, which caused the weight loss.
If that's what you're dealing with, you've gotta find the strength to push through.
You have a reason to fight, though—your kid. You say you don't have support, which might be true, but maybe there’s someone nearby you can lean on after all.
Looking back, most things that felt like the end of the world don't even register anymore. So, just try to pull it together, stay positive, and hang out with people who actually lift you up. A lot of people find their way through faith, and it changes everything. There are also those three-day spiritual retreats that work wonders. Wishing you the best.
Best,

Thanks
I've had my thyroid checked five times in the last year and a half... it's fine.
Saw a psychiatrist too—verdict: healthy, no depression, no anxiety, nothing.
As for those spiritual retreats, I always hear about them from vlč. Linić way too late. I'd love to go, so if anyone knows when they're happening in Cleveland, PLEASE let me know the dates and location..
🙂
Thanks, and big hugs to everyone...🙂

goldenharbor42 said:Thanks
I’ve gone through the shielding process five times over the last year and a half... so, yeah.
I even sat down for consultations with a psychiatrist—the verdict was clear: I’m perfectly healthy, with no signs of depression, anxiety, or any other underlying issues.
As for those spiritual renewal sessions, I always seem to hear about them from Father Linić much too late. I would truly love to attend, so if anyone happens to have information regarding when the next sessions are being held in Cleveland, PLEASE let me know the dates and the location.
🙂
Thank you all, and sending a big hug to everyone...🙂

I would love to be able to help you out, but since I'm based down in Miami, it's quite difficult for me to keep track of everything happening up in Cleveland. Father Linić has visited Miami a few times, and I actually managed to attend three of his sessions there. You might find what you need on the Tabor House website; they keep their seminar schedules posted right there. Why don't you try to coordinate a trip? It's certainly not impossible. Also, keep in mind there is a retreat held on Manhattan with Father Zlatko sudac. Even though you might read various things about him online, those who have actually experienced his work speak of him with nothing but high praise. He has been a tremendous source of support for many people, including those battling cancer.

Thanks everyone for the support
What’s really weighing on me—and I bet it’s the same for 99% of people in this country—is this recession. It honestly scares me to think about when Suzana is going to start cutting hospital funding. Sure, maybe my mom would end up with free medical care because of it, but I’m terrified the worst-case scenario is that patients will start getting subpar or limited treatments—basically, less than what they actually need to survive.

Especially when you look at the statistics and see how many people die from cancer, where chemo sometimes feels like it just extends the inevitable.

I also wanted to ask for some clarification on something.
She’s been prescribed chemotherapy, and she only has one session left. Why would she need radiation after that? She was originally supposed to have it, but her doctor mentioned she probably wouldn't need to go through with it. However, she *is* going to receive something else intravenously—something everyone gets after chemo and radiation. Does anyone know what that is?

Hi everyone,
My mom was diagnosed with lung cancer back when she was 3 months into her journey, classified as stage IIIB T4N2M0. Adenocarcinoma?
Five months in, they performed surgery to remove the tumor and its only metastasis. However, afterward, doctors informed us that some cells had actually reached the lymph nodes in her upper chest, which means she’ll need more chemotherapy than we initially anticipated. To make matters worse, my mom developed an infection after the surgery—specifically J86, which is a lung abscess. She started on antibiotics in the hospital and then transitioned to them at home. Everything seemed to be improving two weeks ago, and we were actually expecting her to start her first round of chemo just the day before yesterday. But over the last few days, the heavy coughing and fever have returned, and her sedimentation levels hit 85. Now she's back on antibiotics, and it's just exhausting. I assume they're going to push back the chemo again, since apparently you can't undergo treatment while fighting an active infection and being on antibiotics. :-(

Since I see everyone here has such different experiences, I wanted to ask: how fast does this disease move? Given that her tumor was removed five months in, and we're already at the end of month seven, and she still hasn't even started her first session of chemo?

Also, should I be worried because she's been sounding hoarse since yesterday? (I read somewhere that could be a bad sign, but I didn't quite grasp why)

I just wanted to add one more thing: I’m honestly so grateful these forums exist. Right now, they’re such a massive source of support for me, especially knowing I'm not alone in all of this. I’ve picked up so many helpful lessons here—some of the things people have said really hit home and moved me to tears, but seeing how everyone else is fighting their battles with such courage and determination gives me a fresh wave of positivity. It makes pushing forward feel just a little bit easier.

quietraven0 said:Hello everyone!
My mother was diagnosed with lung cancer three months ago, classified as stage IIIB T4N2M0. Adenocarcinoma, they said.
Five months in, doctors were able to surgically remove the tumor along with its only metastasis. However, following the procedure, we were informed that some involvement had spread to the lymph nodes in her upper chest, which means she’ll likely need more chemotherapy than originally anticipated. Unfortunately, shortly after surgery, my mom developed an infection—specifically a lung abscess (J86). She started on antibiotics in the hospital and continued them at home. Just two weeks ago, things seemed to be looking up, and she was scheduled to begin her first round of chemo just the day before yesterday. But over the last few days, the heavy coughing returned, accompanied by a fever, and her sedimentation levels spiked to 85. So, back to antibiotics—it’s just exhausting. I assume they will have to postpone the chemotherapy again, as I understand you can't undergo treatment while fighting an active infection. :-(

What I really wanted to ask you all, seeing how varied everyone's experiences are, is: how aggressive is this disease? Given that her tumor was removed five months ago, and we are now at the end of the seventh month, and she hasn't even started her first session of chemo yet, I find myself wondering about the timeline.

Also, should I be worried because she became hoarse yesterday? I read somewhere that it could be a bad sign, but I didn't quite grasp why.

Dear lady,
I am reaching out because my husband went through a very similar journey. In November 2006, he was diagnosed with adenocarcinoma of the lung, and he underwent surgery almost immediately. His tumor was roughly 2 cm, and his lymph nodes tested negative. They ended up removing about 40% of his right lung. It took a full four months before he could start his first round of chemotherapy. He completed four doses, which he handled quite well. Because his pathology results weren't entirely clear, he had to undergo additional testing, during which they discovered and removed polyps in his large intestine—thankfully, as those might have turned into cancer later on. Currently, he is under regular monitoring, and everything is looking good. How large was the tumor in your mother's case? Was she required to have an entire lung removed? And how is she holding up mentally? It is perfectly natural for such news to shake someone to their core; anyone would feel the same way. Once the surgery is complete, her chances are significantly improved.
Please, stay close to her and offer your strength so she doesn't lose heart. My husband found comfort in drinking juices made from beet, orange, and lemon, mixed with honey... and he also took IP6 inositol. Having faith in the healing process is so incredibly important; you truly have to maintain a positive mindset.
Best regards,

@quietraven0/">@@quietraven0,
I was wondering about one more thing—did your mother happen to be a smoker? In our family, we were always told that this specific type of carcinoma is directly linked to smoking habits.
Best,

Donna Chase said:@quietraven0/">@@quietraven0,
I have one more question—was your mother a smoker? We were told that this specific type of carcinoma is linked directly to smoking.
Best,

When you look at the data, adenocarcinoma and small cell lung cancer are the most frequent types seen in smokers, which is why the numbers among heavy smokers are so much higher, but let's be clear: it isn't exclusively a smoker's disease. It hits non-smokers too.

What kind of exercises should I be doing with my arm after breast surgery?

Donna Chase,
I’m honestly so relieved to hear from you and so happy that your husband is doing better now. That really is wonderful news. It sounds like you guys went through something very similar, though in my mom's case, it unfortunately spread to her lymph nodes as well. She was a smoker, too. Right now, what’s actually keeping me up at night is this persistent infection we're battling.

Regarding her mental state, things are a bit complicated because her father passed away from esophageal cancer. I don't know all the specific details since it was quite a long time ago, but she saw firsthand just how brutal that disease can be. I’m doing everything in my power to keep her faith strong, keep her hopeful, and stay positive, but man, some days are just brutal. When she gets completely exhausted, she just hits a wall and says she’s had enough. And I can't help but think—we haven't even truly started yet; the chemotherapy hasn't even begun.

For her immune system, she’s taking beta glucan, vitamins B and C, plenty of honey, and juices made from beets and blackberries. She eats pretty much anything when she has an appetite, but when she doesn't, I usually just stick to making her soups.
Could you give me a little more info on that IP6 inositol? I've never heard of it.

Angela Wright,
My mom was a smoker, just like her dad, who ended up passing away from esophageal cancer.
Even though I don't smoke myself, I sometimes wonder—just how much of a role does genetics play when it comes to cancer?😕

coastalrider8 said:Hang in there—I'm pulling for you, and we're definitely celebrating together once you hit that 60 kg mark... just stay positive... I actually managed to talk my dad into doing it... you can too... just gotta be stubborn... big hug from me!

But honestly, I eat normally like six times a day! I can't even force myself to cram more food in... yet I still lost weight...

quietraven0 said:Angela Wright,
My mother was a heavy smoker, just like her father, who eventually lost his battle with esophageal cancer.
Even though I don't smoke, I can't help but wonder: just how much of cancer is actually written in our DNA?😕

Every single one of us is walking around with cancer cells inside our bodies right now. Seriously—you, me, everyone reading this. At any given moment, those malignant cells are present within us. The only reason they aren't running rampant is because our immune systems are doing their job, keeping them in check and preventing them from multiplying into actual tumors. Cancer is essentially a constant battle of containment. je It’s hereditary, plain and simple—it’s hardwired right into our genetic code. The environment we inhabit plays a massive role in how we develop. It’s all about our lifestyle, our daily habits, and the dietary patterns we inherit from our parents during upbringing. If those foundations are shaky, they can absolutely wreck our immune systems—to the point where our bodies lose the ability to keep malignant cells under control.
Go grab a copy of Dr. David Servan Schreiber’s book, *Against Cancer*. It’s an incredible resource where everything is laid out clearly and backed up by solid scientific studies. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve said this, but I honestly wish I’d had this information years ago—it only landed in my hands after my mom got sick. If I’d had this guide from the start, navigating everything would have been so much easier.

Your mother picked up a nasty habit from her father—smoking. Since you didn't inherit that specific vice, you've actually got a massive leg up; you’re far less likely to end up battling the kind of cancer that specifically targets smokers.
Eat clean, stay active, keep moving, and keep your stress levels in check whenever you can. Focus on boosting your immune system. Honestly, that’s about everything within your control—and more often than not, it's actually the most important part.

quietraven0 said:Donna Chase,
I am truly so relieved to hear from you and to know that your husband is doing better now. That is such wonderful news to receive. It seems we have been walking a very similar path, though in my mother's case, the illness unfortunately spread to her lymph nodes as well. She was a smoker for quite some time. Right now, what weighs most heavily on my mind is this persistent infection we’ve been struggling to manage.

Regarding her mental state, things are a bit complicated because her father passed away from esophageal cancer. I don't know all the specific details since it was many years ago, but she witnessed firsthand just how devastating that disease can be. I try my absolute best to keep her faith strong, to nurture her hope, and to maintain a positive atmosphere, but there are days that feel incredibly heavy. There are moments when she is simply exhausted and tells me she’s had enough of everything. It hits me hard, especially considering we haven't even started the actual chemotherapy rounds yet.

To support her immune system, she’s taking beta glucan, vitamins B and C, plenty of honey, and juices made from beets and blackberries. She eats whatever she can handle when her appetite allows, and when it doesn't, I usually stick to making nutritious soups for her.
Could you tell me a little more about that IP6 inositol? I'm not really familiar with it.

I have touched on this before, though some people have dismissed it as being ineffective. I don't have any clinical data to point to, but a friend of mine brought it to my attention after seeing people she knew using it. So, please believe me when I say this isn't some paid advertisement. If you do a quick search online, you'll see what people are saying about it. From what I have gathered, it seems to bolster the body's natural defenses against cancer cells, and it is often recommended alongside chemotherapy treatments. A single box containing about 120 tablets goes for roughly $100. My husband took it himself and feels it has actually helped. Here is the link for you.http://www.ip6hrvatska.com/StoJeIP6.htm
You are taking such a wonderful approach, and you are being an incredible support to your mother—just keep doing exactly what you're doing.
The reason I asked if she was a smoker is because we have three children, and sometimes the fear creeps in that there might be a genetic component to all of this. If there is anything else you want to talk about, please just ask...

Angela Wright,
thanks for clearing that up; I’m going to try to pick up a copy of that book as soon as I can.
As for stress, I completely agree—it really is the primary trigger for most of those latent illnesses just waiting to flare up inside us.
Sometimes I honestly feel like just packing up and moving to some tiny, quiet island in the Pacific 😉 but life isn't exactly that simple. For me, the thing that helps the most is just taking my dog for a walk; it helps clear my head and gives me a chance to recharge my batteries, even if just a little bit.