Would you date someone with mental health issues?

I don't think I could ever do that. Honestly, I'd be way too terrified. Mental illness is hands down one of the hardest things anyone can go through 😢

silentpilot6 said:I’ll admit this topic feels a bit discriminatory, but I also find it incredibly real and, frankly, quite an interesting question to pose.

To give you a specific example... I have a neighbor who is a lovely, attractive woman 🙂, but she has two cases of schizophrenia in her immediate family—her mother and her uncle. Since we know this condition can be hereditary in many instances, would I enter a relationship with someone like her? To be honest, I wouldn't... both because of her own potential struggles and the risk that our children (if we ever reached that stage 😁) might inherit it too.
With all due respect to those living with the illness, I wouldn't knowingly start a relationship with someone who is either currently struggling or faces a very high probability of developing it.
Of course, I realize it's a completely different story if I were already in a committed relationship where we were deeply in love 😍 and then discovered these facts later on...

oh, so if everyone thought like you, they'd just label everyone mentally ill😂😂👎
See, this is how differently people perceive things. For instance, my current boyfriend met me when I was juggling four different types of medication—he basically picked me up right out of the wreckage... whether that was a wise move or not, I couldn't say. If I were to spiral again in a few years—I don't even want to dwell on that possibility—what's truly wonderful is that he fought for me so fiercely and believed in me when everyone else had doubts. Even if we don't make it, at least I know someone gave it their absolute all... so, I thank God there are people like him, and my thanks go out to my dear genius, always and forever...

It really depends on the specific situation—I mean, I think people tend to blow things way out of proportion when we talk about mental health issues. If we're looking at a condition that isn't harmful to anyone else or doesn't significantly impact the individual's daily life—then why not? Let them be.

Hi.

Whoever decided that some things are just "impossible" clearly hasn't met me. I guess I’m just a hopeless optimist at heart, but I truly believe there's a way to beat any illness. If you really connect with someone on a deep level—you know, build that kind of solid foundation—you'd probably do absolutely everything in your power, whether it's within your control or not, to help them fight through it.

Jeremy Alvarez5 said:Hi.

Whoever decided that some things are just "impossible" clearly hasn't met me. I guess I’m just a hopeless optimist at heart, but I truly believe there's a way to beat any illness. If you really connect with someone on a deep level—you know, build that kind of solid foundation—you'd probably do absolutely everything in your power, whether it's within your control or not, to help them fight through it.

Unfortunately, some things just have to be managed rather than cured. It happens out of nowhere, regardless of how careful you are. You just have to be prepared for that reality. As far as I know, modern medicine hasn't quite reached the point where it can completely wipe out a condition like SCH...🤷

Gary Patel said:It really depends on the specific situation—I mean, I think people tend to blow things way out of proportion when we talk about mental health issues. If we're looking at a condition that isn't harmful to anyone else or doesn't significantly impact the individual's daily life—then why not? Let them be.

I guess I agree. You can't just lump all mental illnesses into one category. People panic the second they hear the term because of ignorance, maybe even romanticizing it too much.
On the other hand, I wouldn't want to be around someone if they're violent, dangerous, or just impossible to deal with. Especially if they're selfish or reckless—which happens often, since illness isn't an excuse for everything—and refuse to take meds or go to therapy because they don't care about anyone else. In those cases, I'd pass.
I haven't read everything, but it seems like those advocating for total acceptance lack actual experience; they probably view it through this idealized lens of human rights. But you can't talk about it without looking at the whole picture—how the family lives, the constant struggle, the stress on the kids, and all that.
Some real-life stories I've heard were honestly horrifying, and I’d choose "no" every time. It's easy to be politically correct.

silentpilot6 said:There is a certain "venting" thread on Reddit 😁 (not sure if anyone has come across it) where people share their painful romantic histories... in several of those stories, people mention having specific mental health diagnoses... well, I won't say more—just read for yourselves what was happening in those relationships.

Look, I just combed through fifty-nine pages of that discussion, and I didn't find a single person mentioned with an schizophrenia diagnosis, so I don't think your point really holds up. 🤷

cosmictinker21 said:Unfortunately, some things just have to be managed rather than cured. It happens out of nowhere, regardless of how careful you are. You just have to be prepared for that reality. As far as I know, modern medicine hasn't quite reached the point where it can completely wipe out a condition like SCH...🤷

Yeah, I heard about this young woman dealing with schizophrenia too. She’s a relative of some neighbors in my area, though they live in a different state. They used to visit her, she’d visit them—she was smart, kind, everything seemed totally fine. Then, out of the blue, we hear she attempted suicide. They barely saved her. And apparently, it's happened a few times now. You never really know. Everything looks normal for years and then, suddenly...
I can't imagine what her family is going through. She still lives with her parents, never married, no kids. Imagine if she actually had children.

silentpilot6 said:I’ll admit this topic feels a bit discriminatory, but I also find it incredibly real and, frankly, quite an interesting question to pose.

To give you a specific example... I have a neighbor who is a lovely, attractive woman 🙂, but she has two cases of schizophrenia in her immediate family—her mother and her uncle. Since we know this condition can be hereditary in many instances, would I enter a relationship with someone like her? To be honest, I wouldn't... both because of her own potential struggles and the risk that our children (if we ever reached that stage 😁) might inherit it too.
With all due respect to those living with the illness, I wouldn't knowingly start a relationship with someone who is either currently struggling or faces a very high probability of developing it.
Of course, I realize it's a completely different story if I were already in a committed relationship where we were deeply in love 😍 and then discovered these facts later on...

🙏😲
Based on this post, you could conclude that people with mental illnesses—or those with a family history—should probably try to hide their condition from someone they want to be with, wait until they hook up and fall in love, and then reveal the truth, because then it would be a different story altogether.

We could probably argue about whether a person who thinks that way is even "normal."🙄

A few years back, I was dating this guy whose father had spent some time in a psychiatric ward way back when. My ex wouldn't touch the subject, so I never actually found out what he was being treated for.
I have to be honest—it weighed on me. It wasn't something I could just shrug off, especially since the truth only came out after we’d already been seeing each other for a few months.

He struggled with OCD, and frankly, it was exhausting. There were moments when I’d be pouring my heart out about something deeply important to me, only to realize he wasn't even listening because he was too busy counting the floor tiles in a Starbucks. Or we’d step out of the car, walk maybe two blocks, and he’d have to turn right back around just to check if the doors were locked. It wasn't enough that I told him they were secure. He had to do it over and over.
Then there was the stuff at my place. He’d obsessively straighten the towels, the coasters, or the mugs. Or he’d absolutely lose it if I moved a glass even an inch away from where he felt it "belonged."
To some people, those might seem like trivial quirks, but I just couldn't handle it. 🤷
I’ll admit it: I felt a massive sense of relief once we finally called it quits. Maybe that sounds selfish. I truly respect anyone who chooses to stay with someone facing those kinds of struggles, but for me? It was just... draining.

I frequently find myself double-checking if I locked the car or turned off the gas valve 😬 though I don't go as far as counting tiles or ensuring everything is perfectly aligned and the parking brake is perfectly straight 😁

By the way, have you all read the thread about "living with someone struggling with mental illness"?
While it covers some extreme situations and quite tragic examples—not to mention there are plenty of positive ones too—honestly, I wouldn't want myself 🙂 or any of my future children
to ever be put in those kinds of positions.

Since I was a kid, I’ve always had this habit of heading back home just to double-check that the doors were actually locked. 😁 I’d be halfway 😉

I don't really do that anymore, but I used to spend forever obsessively checking if I’d done something right or if I’d forgotten something, making lists and stuff. 🤣

No, I was just using OCD as an example of a relatively mild disorder.
Heaven forbid it’s something more severe—I honestly don't think I have the constitution for that.

Let’s say my future husband falls ill one day. I’d give him everything I’ve got to make our life together as smooth and comfortable as possible for everyone involved. But, if things reached a point where it was draining me to the core—if it became a genuine threat to my own mental and physical health, or the well-being of my kids—then yeah, I'd get a divorce.
(I'm not even going to dive into the whole genetics thing or the possibility of having children who might inherit certain conditions right now)

I truly admire people who can live alongside someone dealing with that. Personally? I don't know if I could do it. I firmly believe that people struggling with mental illness need professional medical help, and frankly, I'm just not equipped to provide that kind of care. 🤷

silentpilot6 said:I frequently find myself double-checking if I locked the car or turned off the gas valve 😬 though I don't go as far as counting tiles or ensuring everything is perfectly aligned and the parking brake is perfectly straight 😁

By the way, have you all read the thread about "living with someone struggling with mental illness"?
While it covers some extreme situations and quite tragic examples—not to mention there are plenty of positive ones too—honestly, I wouldn't want myself 🙂 or any of my future children
to ever be put in those kinds of positions.

I know what it's like to be scatterbrained or lose focus sometimes, but what he went through was a different beast entirely.😢

It played out like this: He locks the doors. I tell him, "See? It's locked." I even pull the handle to prove it. He agrees, "Yes, it's locked."
Then, maybe two blocks down, he has to pull a U-turn because suddenly, the certainty just vanishes. He isn't sure anymore. I ask him, "Didn't I just show you? Didn't you check it yourself?" He just says, "Now I'm not sure."
So, we turn around. He checks. It's locked.
We drive on. Another hundred yards later, we head off again.
And then, after another couple of blocks, he pulls over alone, leaving me waiting there.

It gets worse during high-stress moments. For instance, if he's walking across a plaza where the tiles are laid out in a strict checkerboard pattern—he can only step on the black ones. Or if he insists on washing the glass himself before someone brings him a soda. Sometimes the servers at a diner just don't have the patience for it.🤷

And the counting? That was its own special kind of hell. Counting steps. Counting passing cars. Counting red cars in a parking lot. Counting letters, the leaves on a ficus plant, or the horizontal stripes on someone's sweater.

The truth is, I suspect he's still living with that weight today.🤷

silentpilot6 said:I frequently find myself double-checking if I locked the car or turned off the gas valve 😬 though I don't go as far as counting tiles or ensuring everything is perfectly aligned and the parking brake is perfectly straight 😁

By the way, have you all read the thread about "living with someone struggling with mental illness"?
While it covers some extreme situations and quite tragic examples—not to mention there are plenty of positive ones too—honestly, I wouldn't want myself 🙂 or any of my future children
to ever be put in those kinds of positions.

Well, my mother was an alcoholic—to use the proper 🙄 terminology—and she attempted suicide twice; her luck with men was also quite poor, yet I love her a thousand times more than all those "perfect" people—those efficient, organized, and reliable types... like my father’s current wife.
You dare speak of mental illness when it's obvious you haven't a clue what it actually is beyond stereotypes—that schizophrenics are dangerous, or that kids are at risk, and all that nonsense... I could very well die for love, just trying to save or help a loved one, and nothing—not even mental illness, whatever that truly means in a clinical sense—would stop me. In my view, however, the single true deficiency and sickness in people today is simply a lack of love. 🙂

But then again, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I suppose.👍

Jeremy Alvarez5 said:Hi.

Whoever decided that some things are just "impossible" clearly hasn't met me. I guess I’m just a hopeless optimist at heart, but I truly believe there's a way to beat any illness. If you really connect with someone on a deep level—you know, build that kind of solid foundation—you'd probably do absolutely everything in your power, whether it's within your control or not, to help them fight through it.

The problem is, you’re basically prime real estate for people looking to take advantage of a sick partner. Just imagine this: your significant other is sneaking around behind your back while you're struggling, and you have no clue. I've read enough stories about how people act when they're dealing with certain disorders... honestly, how are you supposed to fix something that even the most high-end therapists in the country couldn't touch?
How many times are you going to offer forgiveness before you run dry?

Hannah White2 said:The problem is, you’re basically prime real estate for people looking to take advantage of a sick partner. Just imagine this: your significant other is sneaking around behind your back while you're struggling, and you have no clue. I've read enough stories about how people act when they're dealing with certain disorders... honestly, how are you supposed to fix something that even the most high-end therapists in the country couldn't touch?
How many times are you going to offer forgiveness before you run dry?

Probably never. But honestly, I think you're looking at this all wrong. First off, what I need most in any relationship is honesty and trust. That’s the alpha and omega of everything, I guess. Then there's friendship, that sense of belonging, stuff like that. Who knows how I'd manage to maintain a sex life with my lady if that foundation was gone.

Also, if cheating on someone is strictly a symptom of a mental disorder, then man, a huge chunk of the population is sick.

Thirdly—and this is just theoretical, mind you, not from experience—I think I could probably handle sharing a wife, or in my current situation, women, with other guys. (Actually, I share them whether I want to or not since I don't "own" anyone and don't have that whole marriage thing going on right now). But in reality, I don't have that level of deep trust with anyone to even attempt something like that.

Fourthly, and maybe this is just me overthinking it, but did it ever occur to you that being called a "human being" might imply that monogamy isn't actually natural? Like, maybe trying to force ourselves into it is just a violation of human nature? And maybe the "illness" people talk about is just the fallout from forcing ourselves into these moral norms.

cosmictinker21 said:Unfortunately, some things just have to be managed rather than cured. It happens out of nowhere, regardless of how careful you are. You just have to be prepared for that reality. As far as I know, modern medicine hasn't quite reached the point where it can completely wipe out a condition like SCH...🤷

I don't know, maybe that's not true at all.

I remember one psychiatrist saying that once you make progress with schizophrenia, suddenly everyone claims it wasn't even schizophrenia to begin with.

If you want to see a really great critique of "prestigious" psychiatry and how it's practiced, there's an excellent film posted here by Shamantrix, if I recall correctly. I don't feel like digging for it right now, but it's definitely worth watching a couple of times so you don't miss the interesting details.

Jeremy Alvarez5 said:Probably never. But honestly, I think you're looking at this all wrong. First off, what I need most in any relationship is honesty and trust. That’s the alpha and omega of everything, I guess. Then there's friendship, that sense of belonging, stuff like that. Who knows how I'd manage to maintain a sex life with my lady if that foundation was gone.

Also, if cheating on someone is strictly a symptom of a mental disorder, then man, a huge chunk of the population is sick.

Thirdly—and this is just theoretical, mind you, not from experience—I think I could probably handle sharing a wife, or in my current situation, women, with other guys. (Actually, I share them whether I want to or not since I don't "own" anyone and don't have that whole marriage thing going on right now). But in reality, I don't have that level of deep trust with anyone to even attempt something like that.

Fourthly, and maybe this is just me overthinking it, but did it ever occur to you that being called a "human being" might imply that monogamy isn't actually natural? Like, maybe trying to force ourselves into it is just a violation of human nature? And maybe the "illness" people talk about is just the fallout from forcing ourselves into these moral norms.

I don't know, maybe that's not true at all.

I remember one psychiatrist saying that once you make progress with schizophrenia, suddenly everyone claims it wasn't even schizophrenia to begin with.

If you want to see a really great critique of "prestigious" psychiatry and how it's practiced, there's an excellent film posted here by Shamantrix, if I recall correctly. I don't feel like digging for it right now, but it's definitely worth watching a couple of times so you don't miss the interesting details.

Classic guy logic right there. Honestly, it’d probably be easier for people around here to just accept bigamy, but if you ask me, this whole thing is really just a massive fear of actually dealing with deep emotions.
Look, you can't build a foundation of honesty and trust with someone who's mentally unstable and can't even manage their own reactions.
Plus, since they clearly can't face their own bullshit or recognize their own limits, they aren't ever going to truly respect you, either.

srna001 said:🙏😲
Based on this post, you'd almost think people dealing with mental health issues—or anyone with a family history of illness—should just play it cool and hide their struggles from someone they're interested in. They should wait until the other person is already hooked and deeply in love before dropping the truth bomb, because apparently, that changes the whole dynamic.

And honestly? That’s exactly how things work these days. Nobody wants to deal with someone who's "broken"—it's a harsh reality, but there it is. 🤷

Look, if you ask me... when the healthy folks don't give a damn about the sick ones, it’s perfectly fine for the sick ones to stop caring about them too... It’s just how the math works out. 😁 And hey, maybe they only admit it once they actually fall in love—which is totally fair, right? Just like it’s totally fair for someone to walk away before they even catch feelings, just because you're sick and they don't want to risk getting attached... That's just "love" for you. That's just how people operate...