Can psychology actually help fix relationship issues?

I think I’ve gotten a little lost in all these fairy tales you guys are spinning here, though maybe that’s just because my own memory of them has faded so much... they only really mattered back when I was some little kid, and since my daughter never cared for them, I never really had the chance to brush up on them or anything.
But there is one particular fairy tale that people still cling to today, especially when it comes to how men and women interact... it goes something like this: "What we have is different, and if I just love him enough, I can change him." Unfortunately, that story never, ever has a happy ending...

rustymaker5 said:I think I’ve gotten a little lost in all these fairy tales you guys are spinning here, though maybe that’s just because my own memory of them has faded so much... they only really mattered back when I was some little kid, and since my daughter never cared for them, I never really had the chance to brush up on them or anything.
But there is one particular fairy tale that people still cling to today, especially when it comes to how men and women interact... it goes something like this: "What we have is different, and if I just love him enough, I can change him." Unfortunately, that story never, ever has a happy ending...

I can't deny the bolded part because I'd be lying, though I don't buy the underlined bit for a second.

Half a fairy tale?

Chloe Barnes8 said:Alright, whether that was just a random tangent or not, we definitely drifted a little too far off topic. Let's steer things back toward psychology and relationship dynamics...

Look, you guys can't honestly tell me you don't believe, even just a tiny bit, in those stories about people helping folks untangle their love lives. I mean, just look at those lifestyle columns in the magazines... they're full of all sorts of wild stuff. People write in, experts respond... it's pretty wild how much goes on there.

For me, I've always been kind of fascinated by Magda Weltrusky. I think I've been reading her since I was a kid, probably...🤣

I don't even read 🤷

Chloe Barnes8 said:Alright, whether that was just a random tangent or not, we definitely drifted a little too far off topic. Let's steer things back toward psychology and relationship dynamics...

Look, you guys can't honestly tell me you don't believe, even just a tiny bit, in those stories about people helping folks untangle their love lives. I mean, just look at those lifestyle columns in the magazines... they're full of all sorts of wild stuff. People write in, experts respond... it's pretty wild how much goes on there.

For me, I've always been kind of fascinated by Magda Weltrusky. I think I've been reading her since I was a kid, probably...🤣

Oh boy, Sandra Parker3, what happened to you? You should probably be writing advice columns somewhere else instead.....🙄.....

..........I'm not really in the right headspace, just rambling a bit here.

I’m not really typing much, but I honestly think it’s just super fascinating watching the people responding here... so weird...🤣

Sandra Parker3 said:Just find someone who actually gets you and someone you can actually talk to.
There’s honestly no better therapist than that... 🙂

I guess that's true. Whether we like it or not, we all end up acting like each other's therapists. I suppose how much of a good friend you are—and whether your advice is actually useful—is basically what makes you a decent therapist.

@everyone - I have absolutely no clue who this Vasilija person is; I've never heard of that fish in my life.

Apemant, honestly, the whole idea of the soul has been kicked out of academic psychology for ages—if it was ever really part of the curriculum to begin with...

Since psychology is always trying so hard to be this exact, hard science, I guess the concept of the soul (which is right there in the name, *psyche*, and should basically be the heart of the field) just started feeling too "old school" for them. So, they swapped it out for stuff like mental processes, personality traits, and all that technical jargon...

They basically handed the soul over to the spiritual side of things. Nowadays, you see these modern movements trying to bridge the gap between psychology and spirituality, especially within Christianity, particularly here in the West among Protestant circles...

Look what I stumbled upon. It's an ONT—not like I had any say in the matter, just putting it out there... 😲...

It’s honestly pretty grim how certain groups weaponize psychology just to fuel their criminal operations under the guise of being religious communities.
I actually got chills just thinking about it. brrrrrrrrrrr

Honestly, though, this whole American Psychological Association thing never actually got its hands dirty with military operations, spying, wartime propaganda, economic manipulation, or anything involving the gritty side of the economy... 🤣 🤣

but hey, they sure did a lovely job of claiming ownership over the concept of the soul...

What do you mean, "soul"? What are you even talking about? I guess you shouldn't let people play you for a fool or try to brainwash you like that. A soul isn't a thing. It's just mental manipulation, really.

Angela Rogers2 said:What do you mean, "soul"? What are you even talking about? I guess you shouldn't let people play you for a fool or try to brainwash you like that. A soul isn't a thing. It's just mental manipulation, really.

I mean, if they haven't already brainwashed you too, then we're talking about some next-level psychological conditioning right here.😁 😁 🤣

rustymaker5 said:I think I’ve gotten a little lost in all these fairy tales you guys are spinning here, though maybe that’s just because my own memory of them has faded so much... they only really mattered back when I was some little kid, and since my daughter never cared for them, I never really had the chance to brush up on them or anything.
But there is one particular fairy tale that people still cling to today, especially when it comes to how men and women interact... it goes something like this: "What we have is different, and if I just love him enough, I can change him." Unfortunately, that story never, ever has a happy ending...

That isn't love at all; it is quite clearly VAMPIRISM. They essentially wrap their arms around your neck and suck you dry. If you want proof that vampires actually exist, look no further. 🤷
I am entirely convinced that those old vampire myths are really just metaphors for exactly that kind of behavior.

I mean, how can you say it doesn't exist?
😉What are you even talking about, Chloe Barnes8? Stop embarrassing yourself. 😁

Alright, whether that was just a random tangent or not, we definitely drifted a little too far off topic. Let's steer things back toward psychology and relationship dynamics...

Look, you guys can't honestly tell me you don't believe, even just a tiny bit, in those stories about people helping folks untangle their love lives. I mean, just look at those lifestyle columns in the magazines... they're full of all sorts of wild stuff. People write in, experts respond... it's pretty wild how much goes on there.

For me, I've always been kind of fascinated by Magda Weltrusky. I think I've been reading her since I was a kid, probably...🤣

Angela Rogers2 said:I mean, how can you say it doesn't exist?
😉What are you even talking about, Chloe Barnes8? Stop embarrassing yourself. 😁

Baby, I’m gonna have to count this as one of your sillier little provocations... let's just get back to the actual topic, we really need to put that sharp mind of yours to better use...😉 🙂

Who’s actually making a fool of themselves here?
Of course the soul exists... it's just common sense, really.
What on earth could have possibly convinced you otherwise?

And hey, Colorful, maybe put the popcorn down for a second and actually join the conversation... let's talk about misha mu malega.....🙂 😠

rustymaker5 said:Who’s actually making a fool of themselves here?
Of course the soul exists... it's just common sense, really.
What on earth could have possibly convinced you otherwise?

oh, just ignore her... she’s kind of poking the bear... obviously there's a soul... I mean, come on...🙂

Christian Wells6 said:That isn't love at all; it is quite clearly VAMPIRISM. They essentially wrap their arms around your neck and suck you dry. If you want proof that vampires actually exist, look no further. 🤷
I am entirely convinced that those old vampire myths are really just metaphors for exactly that kind of behavior.

Not really the point, but... vampire tales are about the fear of death and wanting to dodge it at any cost. There's a sexual element too, since vampires always go after virgins. But if we're analyzing gender dynamics in relationships, I'm not so sure.🤷 More of a Faustian theme, just with more sexual undertones.😉

@tereza_ dear Maggie?!(good grief😂 ). I've always wondered if anyone who wrote to her actually followed a single piece of advice. (Are there even writers for those letters, or does the editorial staff just make them up?) And what kind of people look for solutions to their intimate problems in women's magazines? To me, Maggie is basically on par with a psychic hotline. Just cheaper.😁
The American version of Dr. Phil. 🙂

Chloe Barnes8 said:Alright, whether that was just a random tangent or not, we definitely drifted a little too far off topic. Let's steer things back toward psychology and relationship dynamics...

Look, you guys can't honestly tell me you don't believe, even just a tiny bit, in those stories about people helping folks untangle their love lives. I mean, just look at those lifestyle columns in the magazines... they're full of all sorts of wild stuff. People write in, experts respond... it's pretty wild how much goes on there.

For me, I've always been kind of fascinated by Magda Weltrusky. I think I've been reading her since I was a kid, probably...🤣

I wouldn't say I doubt that professionals can help resolve issues in romantic relationships, but I personally wouldn't want to be part of such a narrative. To me, that would imply being in an immature relationship, suggesting I haven't focused enough on my own growth or that my partner is just as unsettled as I am. I believe two individuals who haven't dedicated enough time to themselves will struggle to build something high-quality together, regardless of expert intervention. At most, a specialist might simply make their connection or marriage more tolerable.

Regarding those reader letters in magazines... A friend of mine who works on the editorial board of a women's magazine told me that the problems people actually submit are often quite mundane and everyday, hardly interesting enough to print. Consequently, the entire staff often invents plausible scenarios and solutions just to have something compelling to publish.😁