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Everything you need for a Midwest wedding

Started by Brian Reed74 · · 👁 51 views · 6K replies

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Participants Brian Reed74Nancy Ward37Brandon White4Michael Jones23nimblepilot9Samuel Taylor6vividwolf80northernhawk87placidjackal14neontrucker17Scott Smith68Brandon Johnson17Arthur Ramirez4Charles Roberts41Zachary Gray35Jeffrey Longneongardener6Jacob Young3Brian Gray7Ronald Hill3Kenneth Vaughn10placidcanyon44northernrider14copperraven39 …
Dennis Ramos Dennis Ramos Member
18 messages
joined Nov 2007
#321 ·
Laura Morris4 said:Well, they finally arrived today...
I wasn't even particularly frazzled when the doorbell rang, as I was just getting back from a night shift.
I went $0.48 to grab a jar
I ordered sixty of them, so $29
the only downside is the shipping cost, which was about $13.
But honestly, it’s exactly what I wanted.
I have the honey ready, and I plan to place them in little tiles adorned with sweet bows...
I am quite pleased.🙂

It really is wonderful; I simply adore those little wedding details, and everything feels so lovely right now that I find myself feeling rather indecisive!!! Does anyone happen to have a suggestion for a small, sweet treat I could place next to each guest's plate?🤷 !!!😁
Laura Morris4 Laura Morris4 Member
12 messages
joined Aug 2007
#322 ·
Dennis Ramos said:It really is wonderful; I simply adore those little wedding details, and everything feels so lovely right now that I find myself feeling rather indecisive!!! Does anyone happen to have a suggestion for a small, sweet treat I could place next to each guest's plate?🤷 !!!😁

Hmm, my first thought was those little scented sachets filled with lavender or some other dried herb...
You could grab some fabric in whatever color matches your theme, sew up some tiny pouches, fill them with the dried botanicals, and tie them off with a nice ribbon.
You could even embroider your names directly onto the fabric or attach a little tag to the bow.
I think it’s a pretty unique touch....
Dennis Ramos Dennis Ramos Member
18 messages
joined Nov 2007
#323 ·
Laura Morris4 said:Well, my initial thought was perhaps those little lavender sachets or some other aromatic herb...
you could pick out fabric in whatever color you prefer, sew up some small pouches, fill them with dried herbs, and tie them off neatly with a ribbon.
You could even embroider names onto them or attach a personalized paper tag to the bow.
I find that quite charming and unique...

Now, now... that isn't a bad idea at all...👍..just keep thinking if anything else strikes your fancy... go for it!
Laura Morris4 Laura Morris4 Member
12 messages
joined Aug 2007
#324 ·
I have plenty of ideas swirling around in my head... but the real question is whether they’re actually feasible from a budget standpoint.
My partner and I handle all our own expenses, which is exactly why I’ve been diving headfirst into DIY projects lately.
Today, I spent hours scouring the city—literally checking dozens upon dozens of shops—looking for those specific glass globe vessels
that you use for floating candles... but I came up empty. To make matters worse, the local glassware boutiques are charging $40 a piece.$17There is just no way I can justify that cost!
Michael Perez5 Michael Perez5 Active Member
81 messages
joined Nov 2004
#325 ·
I really wanted to believe it, I truly did.
I don't really have much of a relationship with priests—though I definitely have one with God. I suppose if you asked the representatives of the church, they might label me an atheist. For them, maybe that’s true... but their opinion doesn't really change my faith. To me, they're just ordinary people. They don't have the power to "forgive someone's sins." That is something only God can do, and I assume that only happens after a sinner truly repents from the heart. But let me clarify.

Here’s how things stand:
I was baptized in Indianapolis, over in the Rutherford neighborhood.
I wasn't complaining, really. It's just that back when I was actually supposed to be getting confirmed, I wasn't even allowed to attend religious education classes... but that’s a whole other story, I guess.

She was baptized over in Indianapolis, specifically in the South II neighborhood, and had her confirmation up in Long Valley. She lives in a town just outside of Indy, and I actually live in a different town nearby. 🙂

We had our hearts set on getting married at St. Michael's Church over in Rutherford, near Indianapolis.

We headed over to the parish office in Rutherford today, but the priest wasn't around when we arrived. I noticed this massive apartment right there in the courtyard with a really beautiful yard. We sat in the car for a little bit, just waiting, until he finally showed up. As soon as we were Going Out, he pulled his new Golf right into his own driveway. He actually saw us approaching, but instead of saying hello, he just shut those heavy, solid doors. We went inside and gave him a proper greeting, letting him know we needed a moment of his time. But as he was heading up the stairs, he just muttered, "What is it you need?"

The vibe was just... awkward, like we were totally inconveniencing her. We walked into this space that felt exactly like some corporate office. We mentioned how much we’d love to get married at St. Michael's Church, so we went in to ask if that might actually be an option... we were being really humble and polite about it.

That was when the IRS really started acting up!

The priest: Which parish are you all in?
I guess I should probably mention that... In that spot and that one.
Priest: Why don't you just handle that back home? I mean, come on... if I absolutely have to marry you, fine, but you can't just show up like this! (shouting)
I just wanted to ask you—we have this real heartfelt desire to get married at St. Michael's Church, mostly because we have such deep sentimental ties to the place.
The priest: Oh, please, don't even start with me! (He’s pacing around his office like he’s expecting me to throw a punch at him.) Seriously though, how are you actually going to get your kids baptized? What kind of relationship do you even have with your local parishes?
Me: Oh, nothing in particular, I guess.
Priest: So, you’re actually asking me to offici your wedding? (He starts shouting—it gets awkward fast, and I honestly can't believe this is happening.) Look, if I absolutely have to perform the ceremony, fine, but don't you dare lecture me. I know how this works. If your own church isn't exactly drawing a crowd, you'd probably rather just do it here instead... You really need to build a better relationship with your local parishes first. You should probably go ask your fellow clergy what they think about this kind of thing; you can't just act like this... (He keeps yelling, and he seems incredibly on edge.)
Well, obviously we’re going to ask them... we just wanted to check in and see where you all stand on this first, since we don't really know anything about it ourselves. We were under the impression that they told us we needed to prepare the registration forms through our own local parishes?
The priest was basically like, "...Are you kidding me? Why are you even here?" He went on to say that if he actually agreed to marry us, we’d just head back to our home parishes and tell everyone, "Oh, all we need is the release paperwork because the priest said he'd do it!"
Look, I'm not lying... I just really wanted to see where you guys stand on this.
A priest? Honestly... if you're that determined, maybe just have your own local pastor marry you then.

....
...

Thank you so much... goodbye.

Going Out... we step onto the street and see a couple just standing Outside... "Is the priest inside?" Yeah, he is... "How's the weather looking today?"?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????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That’s about all I have to say on the matter.
I’m honestly in complete shock right now. I'll be the first to admit that I’ve always had a pretty negative view of priests—I’ve always felt like they don't really have any connection to God at all. But after what happened today... I’m just speechless. I don't even know what to say.
As if it isn't enough that they lack any sense of humility, or that they have no concept of what poverty or true contrition actually look like... as if it isn't bad enough that they lack basic decency and actively turn people away from their faith... as if being arrogant and rude wasn't plenty... then you add the fact that they draw a salary, snatch money right out of people's pockets, and claim a Christian is only "good" based on how much cash they leave at the altar. It’s just wrong. They live in these massive estates, obsessed with nothing but hedonism—money, luxury cars, gambling, huge mansions, and having staff that act like they're part of some holy order, all funded by the donations from the parishioners. Honestly, it’s just a total disgrace.

And finally... my dear says she doesn't want to see him anymore, nor does she want anything to do with "his church."

His? Seriously? Since when do priests own property and churches personally??? I swear, I’ll take this all the way to the Vatican if I have to, but I won't let this slide. I am just so fed up with these scammers. (And look, major respect to the exceptions who truly serve God and people and actually live out their faith) but unfortunately, either I have terrible luck or I just keep running into these absolute crooks. And today... today was just too much.

I think I might actually start a blog just to expose priests like this—documenting exactly who did what and when.

I'm pretty worked up right now... but you have to agree, this isn't how someone should act. A man in that position is supposed to be a role model for how people should live, representing himself and his calling with integrity...

It's just awful.
Scott Scott2 Scott Scott2 Newcomer
2 messages
joined Jan 2008
#326 ·
Michael Perez5 said:I really wanted to believe it, I truly did.
I don't really have much of a relationship with priests—though I definitely have one with God. I suppose if you asked the representatives of the church, they might label me an atheist. For them, maybe that’s true... but their opinion doesn't really change my faith. To me, they're just ordinary people. They don't have the power to "forgive someone's sins." That is something only God can do, and I assume that only happens after a sinner truly repents from the heart. But let me clarify.

Here’s how things stand:
I was baptized in Indianapolis, over in the Rutherford neighborhood.
I wasn't complaining, really. It's just that back when I was actually supposed to be getting confirmed, I wasn't even allowed to attend religious education classes... but that’s a whole other story, I guess.

She was baptized over in Indianapolis, specifically in the South II neighborhood, and had her confirmation up in Long Valley. She lives in a town just outside of Indy, and I actually live in a different town nearby. 🙂

We had our hearts set on getting married at St. Michael's Church over in Rutherford, near Indianapolis.

We headed over to the parish office in Rutherford today, but the priest wasn't around when we arrived. I noticed this massive apartment right there in the courtyard with a really beautiful yard. We sat in the car for a little bit, just waiting, until he finally showed up. As soon as we were Going Out, he pulled his new Golf right into his own driveway. He actually saw us approaching, but instead of saying hello, he just shut those heavy, solid doors. We went inside and gave him a proper greeting, letting him know we needed a moment of his time. But as he was heading up the stairs, he just muttered, "What is it you need?"

The vibe was just... awkward, like we were totally inconveniencing her. We walked into this space that felt exactly like some corporate office. We mentioned how much we’d love to get married at St. Michael's Church, so we went in to ask if that might actually be an option... we were being really humble and polite about it.

That was when the IRS really started acting up!

The priest: Which parish are you all in?
I guess I should probably mention that... In that spot and that one.
Priest: Why don't you just handle that back home? I mean, come on... if I absolutely have to marry you, fine, but you can't just show up like this! (shouting)
I just wanted to ask you—we have this real heartfelt desire to get married at St. Michael's Church, mostly because we have such deep sentimental ties to the place.
The priest: Oh, please, don't even start with me! (He’s pacing around his office like he’s expecting me to throw a punch at him.) Seriously though, how are you actually going to get your kids baptized? What kind of relationship do you even have with your local parishes?
Me: Oh, nothing in particular, I guess.
Priest: So, you’re actually asking me to offici your wedding? (He starts shouting—it gets awkward fast, and I honestly can't believe this is happening.) Look, if I absolutely have to perform the ceremony, fine, but don't you dare lecture me. I know how this works. If your own church isn't exactly drawing a crowd, you'd probably rather just do it here instead... You really need to build a better relationship with your local parishes first. You should probably go ask your fellow clergy what they think about this kind of thing; you can't just act like this... (He keeps yelling, and he seems incredibly on edge.)
Well, obviously we’re going to ask them... we just wanted to check in and see where you all stand on this first, since we don't really know anything about it ourselves. We were under the impression that they told us we needed to prepare the registration forms through our own local parishes?
The priest was basically like, "...Are you kidding me? Why are you even here?" He went on to say that if he actually agreed to marry us, we’d just head back to our home parishes and tell everyone, "Oh, all we need is the release paperwork because the priest said he'd do it!"
Look, I'm not lying... I just really wanted to see where you guys stand on this.
A priest? Honestly... if you're that determined, maybe just have your own local pastor marry you then.

....
...

Thank you so much... goodbye.

Going Out... we step onto the street and see a couple just standing Outside... "Is the priest inside?" Yeah, he is... "How's the weather looking 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That’s about all I have to say on the matter.
I’m honestly in complete shock right now. I'll be the first to admit that I’ve always had a pretty negative view of priests—I’ve always felt like they don't really have any connection to God at all. But after what happened today... I’m just speechless. I don't even know what to say.
As if it isn't enough that they lack any sense of humility, or that they have no concept of what poverty or true contrition actually look like... as if it isn't bad enough that they lack basic decency and actively turn people away from their faith... as if being arrogant and rude wasn't plenty... then you add the fact that they draw a salary, snatch money right out of people's pockets, and claim a Christian is only "good" based on how much cash they leave at the altar. It’s just wrong. They live in these massive estates, obsessed with nothing but hedonism—money, luxury cars, gambling, huge mansions, and having staff that act like they're part of some holy order, all funded by the donations from the parishioners. Honestly, it’s just a total disgrace.

And finally... my dear says she doesn't want to see him anymore, nor does she want anything to do with "his church."

His? Seriously? Since when do priests own property and churches personally??? I swear, I’ll take this all the way to the Vatican if I have to, but I won't let this slide. I am just so fed up with these scammers. (And look, major respect to the exceptions who truly serve God and people and actually live out their faith) but unfortunately, either I have terrible luck or I just keep running into these absolute crooks. And today... today was just too much.

I think I might actually start a blog just to expose priests like this—documenting exactly who did what and when.

I'm pretty worked up right now... but you have to agree, this isn't how someone should act. A man in that position is supposed to be a role model for how people should live, representing himself and his calling with integrity...

It's just awful.

I wouldn't be too surprised if I were you about how someone acts when they talk all about being humble but then drive around in a brand-new Golf. It’s like, maybe all they really care about is money. Even that guy over at the big cathedral in Indianapolis isn't exactly a model of modesty, either. I think his backyard gate behind St. Michael's Church on Pejačević Avenue opens with a remote just so he doesn't have to go outside—he's probably driving a new Golf too, if I remember right. And meanwhile, his congregation shows up to service hungry. I just don't even know what to say about people like that! 🤮
velvetranger52 velvetranger52 Member
12 messages
joined Jan 2008
#327 ·
If you want to call yourself a believer, you need to actually act like one, and frankly, you aren't even meeting the bare minimum. That’s where your drift from the Church begins. This isn't some movie theater where you just show up if the film looks good and head to the Starbucks if it doesn't.
Look, you don't have to be a saint, but you can't walk into a parish and demand the priest cater to your whims on your own timeline and terms. It doesn't work that way.
If you don't want to follow the rules, go get married at City Hall instead.
Take a hard look at where you went wrong and work with the priest to follow proper Church protocol.
If you want the services the Church provides, you have to respect the sacraments. Everything is possible with God's help, so stop being a skeptic. Go back with your girlfriend and do this right this time—with a much better attitude.
Michael Perez5 Michael Perez5 Active Member
81 messages
joined Nov 2004
#328 ·
So, I guess I’m not a believer just because I haven't done my Confirmation... wow... that’s exactly the kind of response I was expecting. Maybe I’m not a believer either because I don't leave money $333 to cover "the priest's needs—the parish's needs"
. Or maybe I’m not a believer because I believe a priest can't actually "forgive" my sins; only God can, and even then, only if I sincerely repent by my own bed and He hears me, right?
Am I not a believer if I don't show up at St. Michael's Church regularly?
Am I not a believer because I think the nuns shouldn't be treated like servants to the priests?
And am I not a believer if I spend my time helping the sick, the hungry, and those in need... which I ALWAYS do?

Did God suggest that priests should drive around in brand-new cars, go out for fancy lunches at restaurants, or hang out with their buddies at night over beers talking about what some teenage girls confessed during confession regarding their first experiences? Is that why the sacraments have to be respected?

Look, I realize that if I want a church wedding, I have to follow whatever rules the church sets. That’s just how it works. I know I need to do my Confirmation, and I will do it. So, the sacraments are being honored... but that's not what we're talking about right now! My faith is deep, and it's my own personal relationship with God (which, I mean, I believe everyone should have if they want to live honestly and in peace—you don't need priests to take your money and tell you whether you're a believer or not... I guess...). But unfortunately, I haven't had a single positive experience with priests. In fact, my experiences have been completely opposite, and in the worst way possible.

I would truly love to talk to an honest, humble, and reasonable representative of God, but I haven't run into one yet...

The reason I'm writing here is about the behavior of a priest who acted so condescendingly and arrogantly. He looked down on me, insulted me, and treated me like a liar... I mean, what kind of man does that? I don't even have friends like that...

How can you ask people for MONEY when they already hold such a fearful respect for priests, and many actually think they aren't "good believers" if they don't give enough cash? I just can't believe it... but what happened today really crossed the line. And by the way, I didn't even tell him I hadn't done my Confirmation. Honestly, I could barely get a word in between his outbursts... who knows... if I had, he probably would have kicked me out right then and there... 😢
Scott Scott2 Scott Scott2 Newcomer
2 messages
joined Jan 2008
#329 ·
velvetranger52 said:If you want to call yourself a believer, you need to actually act like one, and frankly, you aren't even meeting the bare minimum. That’s where your drift from the Church begins. This isn't some movie theater where you just show up if the film looks good and head to the Starbucks if it doesn't.
Look, you don't have to be a saint, but you can't walk into a parish and demand the priest cater to your whims on your own timeline and terms. It doesn't work that way.
If you don't want to follow the rules, go get married at City Hall instead.
Take a hard look at where you went wrong and work with the priest to follow proper Church protocol.
If you want the services the Church provides, you have to respect the sacraments. Everything is possible with God's help, so stop being a skeptic. Go back with your girlfriend and do this right this time—with a much better attitude.

I guess I just hope he makes enough money to pull off that new vibe...
I mean, he's trying to impress a successful businessman who probably isn't about to drop $25,000 on a car.
Michael Perez5 Michael Perez5 Active Member
81 messages
joined Nov 2004
#330 ·
The car itself doesn't even matter... It’s just the fact that he started screaming at me simply because I approached him with a question... I mean, who is actually the crazy one here? Why... why am I even sitting here writing this? If I hadn't posted this here, I probably would have written it on my blog or sent it to the local news... I just don't understand why he does this. What kind of example is that for people and for believers? Why!?

But look... I want to get married at St. Michael's Church, and I truly believe I have a right to do so... How can I go about fighting for those rights?
Lisa Ortiz2 Lisa Ortiz2 Member
39 messages
joined Oct 2005
#331 ·
Michael Perez5 said:The car itself doesn't even matter... It’s just the fact that he started screaming at me simply because I approached him with a question... I mean, who is actually the crazy one here? Why... why am I even sitting here writing this? If I hadn't posted this here, I probably would have written it on my blog or sent it to the local news... I just don't understand why he does this. What kind of example is that for people and for believers? Why!?

But look... I want to get married at St. Michael's Church, and I truly believe I have a right to do so... How can I go about fighting for those rights?

Good luck.🙂 Stand your ground. Remember, a priest doesn't actually "give" you anything of his own during a wedding; he is simply facilitating God's blessing. He has absolutely no business raising his voice at you. Don't be afraid to tell him plainly that his conduct was unprofessional and rude.
I didn't go through a crisis myself, so I was able to move forward with my wedding without any issues.
The way that priest behaved is completely unacceptable. They aren't saints, after all. You should let him know that you intend to file a formal complaint regarding his behavior.
Michael Perez5 Michael Perez5 Active Member
81 messages
joined Nov 2004
#332 ·
I think I'm going to have a meltdown... everything will follow the usual protocol... but there's no way he's going to be the one officiating our wedding, that much is certain. Still, I'm trying to figure out a workaround so we can still hold the ceremony at that church in downtown Savannah.

Does anyone know how the relationships between different parishes and their priests usually work? I guess I'm wondering how I should handle this—does anyone have any insight?
fadedtrucker19 fadedtrucker19 Member
31 messages
joined Dec 2002
#333 ·
Michael Perez5 said:So, I guess I’m not a believer just because I haven't done my Confirmation... wow... that’s exactly the kind of response I was expecting. Maybe I’m not a believer either because I don't leave money $333 to cover "the priest's needs—the parish's needs"
. Or maybe I’m not a believer because I believe a priest can't actually "forgive" my sins; only God can, and even then, only if I sincerely repent by my own bed and He hears me, right?
Am I not a believer if I don't show up at St. Michael's Church regularly?
Am I not a believer because I think the nuns shouldn't be treated like servants to the priests?
And am I not a believer if I spend my time helping the sick, the hungry, and those in need... which I ALWAYS do?

Did God suggest that priests should drive around in brand-new cars, go out for fancy lunches at restaurants, or hang out with their buddies at night over beers talking about what some teenage girls confessed during confession regarding their first experiences? Is that why the sacraments have to be respected?

Look, I realize that if I want a church wedding, I have to follow whatever rules the church sets. That’s just how it works. I know I need to do my Confirmation, and I will do it. So, the sacraments are being honored... but that's not what we're talking about right now! My faith is deep, and it's my own personal relationship with God (which, I mean, I believe everyone should have if they want to live honestly and in peace—you don't need priests to take your money and tell you whether you're a believer or not... I guess...). But unfortunately, I haven't had a single positive experience with priests. In fact, my experiences have been completely opposite, and in the worst way possible.

I would truly love to talk to an honest, humble, and reasonable representative of God, but I haven't run into one yet...

The reason I'm writing here is about the behavior of a priest who acted so condescendingly and arrogantly. He looked down on me, insulted me, and treated me like a liar... I mean, what kind of man does that? I don't even have friends like that...

How can you ask people for MONEY when they already hold such a fearful respect for priests, and many actually think they aren't "good believers" if they don't give enough cash? I just can't believe it... but what happened today really crossed the line. And by the way, I didn't even tell him I hadn't done my Confirmation. Honestly, I could barely get a word in between his outbursts... who knows... if I had, he probably would have kicked me out right then and there... 😢

Look, if you actually heard this with your own ears or if you have witnesses to such behavior, you really ought to report him to the Archbishop for violating the seal of confession.
Angela Torres78 Angela Torres78 Newcomer
9 messages
joined Jan 2008
#334 ·
You haven't got a clue. You'd basically want a church wedding just for the sake of having a big procession, not because of your faith or you and your bride. You’d want to kneel at the altar without any of the sacraments, read from a microphone, and tell the photographer and videographer exactly where to stand in front of the priest. So, did you mess up, and now you're here on this forum whining and threatening journalists and bloggers? Huh? I guess you actually are some kind of local fear factor if you feel the need to follow every single trend. This short-fused moderator business has nothing to do with the priest... it's all about you.👎
mellowdriver86 mellowdriver86 Newcomer
6 messages
joined Jan 2008
#335 ·
Canon law typically dictates that you hold your wedding in your home parish, usually where the bride belongs. If you want to marry elsewhere, you have to notify your own parish and provide some sort of clearance certificate. I’m not entirely sure of the technical term, but I witnessed this firsthand when a couple recently moved to downtown Chicago and wanted to register for their wedding; since their documents still listed their old addresses, they had to bring those official papers from their previous parishes.
I don't know this priest, and I'm certainly not defending him, but did you even show up during office hours? Maybe the man was in a rush. Perhaps he teaches religion at a local school and is just getting back from a classroom full of kids who drove his blood pressure through the roof until he couldn't even remember his own name (anyone who has ever worked in an American school knows how chaotic they've become lately).
As for the money, priests don't receive a standard salary because they serve the parish, unless they teach religious education, in which case they get paid based on their credentials. And why shouldn't he have a car? What does it matter if he's new? In this day and age, parishes are massive, and there are plenty of elderly and sick people who need home visits. If someone else were driving them, people would just accuse the priest of using church funds for private luxuries.
And what is the issue with giving donations at the church? Here, everyone gives whatever they can afford. No one shames them for it. In fact, it’s often said that if you have nothing, just come and say so, and people will help you. But then, certain individuals exploit that kindness and expect huge sums of money. You show up at the door with basic groceries because you know they can't afford food, and they snap at you, demanding cash while holding a pack of cigarettes in their hand.
Christian Torres3 Christian Torres3 Regular
604 messages
joined Sep 2014
#336 ·
fadedtrucker19 said:Look, if you actually heard this with your own ears or if you have witnesses to such behavior, you really ought to report him to the Archbishop for violating the seal of confession.

But what if the Bishop was on the payroll too? 😁
Michael Perez5 Michael Perez5 Active Member
81 messages
joined Nov 2004
#337 ·
I don't go around gossiping about priests... I haven't heard this specific story myself, but the people who do talk always seem to be rehashing the same old "incidents." Honestly, I have no intention of trying to ruin anyone's reputation or anything like that... but today’s situation really pushed me to finally just write down everything that's on my mind... I mean, I just can't wrap my head around how someone who is supposed to be a role model for the community could 😢
mellowdriver86 mellowdriver86 Newcomer
6 messages
joined Jan 2008
#338 ·
And your headline makes it sound like every single priest in the Midwest is incompetent.
And don't even get me started on weddings. They stay away from church for years, then suddenly they want to tie the knot and expect a full choir to perform for them? People will believe anything! Then they have the nerve to complain about the wedding fee. And what's with the entitlement, expecting the church to be decked out in flowers and fancy organs on their dime?!
velvetgull9 velvetgull9 Active Member
113 messages
joined Dec 2005
#339 ·
Michael Perez5, I was actually just reading today about how girls from Miami are filing lawsuits against some priest who acts the exact same way.

Maybe this topic would fit better over on WeddingWire, what do you think? 😉
crimsonhound80 crimsonhound80 Active Member
175 messages
joined Mar 2008
#340 ·
Michael Perez5 said:The car itself doesn't even matter... It’s just the fact that he started screaming at me simply because I approached him with a question... I mean, who is actually the crazy one here? Why... why am I even sitting here writing this? If I hadn't posted this here, I probably would have written it on my blog or sent it to the local news... I just don't understand why he does this. What kind of example is that for people and for believers? Why!?

But look... I want to get married at St. Michael's Church, and I truly believe I have a right to do so... How can I go about fighting for those rights?

You shouldn't have just stood there while he was shouting at you; you should have given him a death stare and yelled right back—I'm being dead serious, most people, including those types, only respect strength.

Back when the Reverend Majdandžić was at Divaltov, 🤷, he used to marry everyone—even folks from different denominations, not just Catholics—and he didn't care if you had been through confirmation or which parish you belonged to, as long as the fees were settled. 🙂, but he isn't the priest there anymore.

Honestly, I really don't know how to help you 🤷, because from what I understand, you can get married in a different parish too, provided you pay the right amount.

At least, that’s how things worked back in the day after the war ☕

Maybe try to find a connection—some influential Priest (maybe through family?) who can pull some strings with that big shot over in the old district.

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