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Posts by Donna White50

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Feeling Trapped in Life in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Turner3 said:Yeah, everyone wants someone who already knows the ropes, and that’s always where the wall is.

But seriously, how is working in a Walmart warehouse going to help me in my actual career or anything remotely related to my field?

What is five years of doing that going to teach me that makes me better at my actual profession?

I think you're totally missing the point here.
Basically, you're dreaming of landing this perfect, high-paying dream job right after graduation...
But that's just not how it works, especially in America where there's such a massive gap between what people study and what the job market actually needs. Everyone wants to major in business or management—just caricaturing here—and expect a cushy corporate gig or a steady government job. The reality is that most people are out there grinding, fighting tooth and nail just to find something decent. You aren't in that lucky position yet, and if you just sit around waiting for your big break, you'll be waiting forever. You'll just end up frustrated, burnt out, depressed, and honestly, you'll lose your drive and your youth while waiting for a life that looks good on paper...

But if you actually get out there and start from the bottom, you'll learn so much more. You'll see how the system really runs, meet the right people, and those connections will open doors to much better opportunities later. It's actually pretty fulfilling once you're in it, and you'll feel way more motivated to move up... plus, any employer will give you a shot once they see a resume that isn't empty. More than that, you'll realize life isn't some fairytale about getting a dream job the second you get your diploma—it's the real world, and you've gotta fight for yourself every single day.
Feeling Trapped in Life in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Turner3 said:A lot of people say that, but I’ve personally been in that position where I was working lower-level jobs, while plenty of people I know who had the exact same level of education were already landed in roles that actually matched their credentials. So...

I feel like I've written this so many times before, but man, it's always way easier said than done 🙄

Believe it or not, I've even looked into those kinds of roles, but I'm not exactly built for heavy physical labor, and I'm definitely not a "people person" (which is one of the reasons I don't think I'll ever really move up the ladder, I'll probably just be drifting through life)...

As for how much wages will rise, well, even Nestlé is looking for people to work three shifts on temporary contracts for $1500 in Chicago, where the average salary is already over $2333. And even those jobs are seeing a huge rush of applicants.

Having a specialized degree is great, or so everyone tells me, but I honestly have no clue where I'd fit in. Aside from warehouse work that pays just a little bit more than minimum wage...

Look, I'm an employer, and from where I'm standing, if you don't have any work experience, you're basically starting from zero.
So, just find an opportunity anywhere. Put in three months, maybe six, then jump to a better gig and move up from there. That's how you build yourself up and figure out what you're actually capable of. Everyone starts somewhere—you just have to take the leap. I used to be mixing mortar for $1333 and I was honestly pretty happy doing that...
Feeling Trapped in Life in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Turner3 said:I definitely know I’m overthinking things too much, I’ve always been that way. And yeah, I’m far from being an optimist, though I’m not really sure why anyone would bother being one lately...

I don't really believe it's going to get better, because even just looking at the reality that my ceiling at this job is maybe three or four $0.00,and knowing I'll probably only be here for a couple of years until someone younger takes over (I'm talking about those easier physical roles), doesn't give me much confidence that my life will ever be more than just scraping by...

I’ve already tried applying for stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with my background, and I still didn't get hired. Now, I’ve pretty much lost the will to even try that anymore...

Retail, warehouse work, stocking shelves, kitchen prep... you could find a job in any of those places if you were a stray cat, let alone a person with an education and healthy hands and feet...
Wages have to go up eventually—they have to, since nobody wants to work anymore. And honestly, don't let that college degree trap you when you're looking for work. A lot of times, people realize that what they spent years studying doesn't actually pay the bills and has zero future in it...
Feeling Trapped in Life in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Turner3 said:I was wondering if anyone here has ever been through this, lived it, and maybe even found a way out... or if I could just vent for a second to get it off my chest 🙄

I’ll try to keep this brief and just give you the highlights of what's going on with me...

I honestly feel like I'm trapped, like everyone is actively working to keep me from actually "spreading my wings" or moving forward...

And obviously—if my description makes any sense at all—that feeling is totally understandable because my life feels incredibly restricted from every single angle, whether it's money, social life, mental health, or whatever else hits me...

I don't really remember being someone who knew much about anything, but looking back over the last few years (I'm 26 now), after dealing with some struggles at college and a few other things, I just have no clue what I want anymore—honestly, I never really had a clear vision of who I wanted to be anyway...

I’m just not happy—not that I ever really was, if I'm being real—and I can't see anything that might actually bring me joy. The bigger issue is that with so much crap going on, even if I did stumble upon something that made me smile, I probably wouldn't even notice because I'm too preoccupied with everything weighing me down...

My personality, how I was raised, people not understanding me, and the total lack of support from those closest to me for basically anything... it's all pushed me up against a wall where I'm starting to fear absolutely everything. I tried looking for work for a while, but I guess that misery was pretty obvious during interviews, so I ended up giving up on that too. To even apply for jobs now, I'd need to hit the books, relearn stuff, and polish up my skills, but I just don't have the drive for any of it...

I truly believe that if I had landed a job even a year ago, it might have pulled me out of this funk—or maybe it would have sped up my slide into this current state—but I think it would have given me an appetite for life again, a desire to actually build something for myself...

But unfortunately, that didn't happen, and I'm just rotting away more and more every day, terrified of even trying, of sending out applications—since I've never been the assertive type—and I have zero self-confidence. I'm scared I won't be any good at a job, which is pretty obvious, and why would anyone give me a shot when I've never received a shred of support, even from my own family...

Even though I'm scared, I can say there's only one thing I'm becoming less afraid of, and it comes from asking myself: Why am I even bothering to struggle in this world?


You're spiraling into overthinking, which is a fast track to depression. You feel this way because you're at a major crossroads in life—it's that identity crisis you hit when you're trying to transition into adulthood and independence. People who don't finish college usually hit this in their late teens, and those who do go through it right after graduation. It's all those questions: Where am I going? What am I doing? How will I survive? Can I actually do this? Why can't I? Why does nobody get me? Does life even matter? Why am I here? It's a lot...

It'll pass once you find some kind of work and start taking care of yourself. Seriously, any job will do. If it isn't in your field, fine—just get in there. Everywhere is short-staffed right now, so you could grab a seasonal gig just to break out of this dark hole. Just something to help you fight back and prove to yourself that you *can* do it, even if it feels impossible. Once you're busy with that, you'll start dealing with actual, concrete things instead of these endless, useless thoughts and fears that lead nowhere...😉
Now, just go on Indeed or something and start applying for whatever you can handle...😉
Who can I talk to for help? Who should I reach out to? in Psychology & Therapy ·
Harold Anderson3 said:Thanks so much lady number 🙂
Right now, my options are pretty limited to working as a construction laborer.
That’s really the only thing I can step into given my experience, though the pay is nothing to write home about.
I've actually heard of IBM therapy mentioned before, but honestly, I don't know the first thing about it.🕺
I'll give it a good search on Google; thanks for the tip.😉

Look, if you learn how to hang drywall, do taping and mudding, painting, plastering, or even laying laminate, you'll be set—you could pick up side gigs on top of your main job and the money would be way better... 👍
Who can I talk to for help? Who should I reach out to? in Psychology & Therapy ·
I can't really give you some profound life advice here. Unfortunately, therapy isn't cheap—but honestly, I think for you, the priority is getting an accurate diagnosis and keeping everything steady with medication. Living with a condition like yours is incredibly tough and demanding, but you can't let it break you. Your mental health has to be your number one priority—everything else, like finding your footing with work or just moving forward, comes after that. Fight for yourself and don't throw in the towel. You’ve got to accept the diagnosis and learn how to navigate life around it, while still trying to make the absolute most out of everything... because once things are stable, life for all of us pretty much boils down to a daily grind with just tiny little moments of joy sprinkled in...
Feeling totally unmotivated lately in Psychology & Therapy ·
lonedriver65 said:I honestly have no idea how to dig myself out of this hole. I’m such a sweet, positive person, really, so why does it feel like life just takes aim at me in every single direction? No matter how hard I try to keep my head up and stay sane, something just comes along and knocks the wind out of me. It’s been going on for years...

Work—I’m making like $2,000 or $3,000 less than I actually should be. Why? Because I'm young, I'm a WOMAN (yeah, they pay us less), and on paper, I don't have more than three years of experience. They don't give a damn about what I actually know or how much I've improved. If I want a decent salary, like $5,000 or $6,000, I have to pick up side gigs on top of my main job, which I do. Basically, I'm working myself into an early grave. 🤦 And get this—this has been the story for years. Then some new guy shows up, becomes my boss, makes way more money than me, and has even less training? And I'm the one teaching *him* how to do the job. Like, hello?? I’m stuck because I can't seem to find another job anywhere.

Family—one of my parents is seriously ill, and according to the doctors, we could lose them any day now. I've been dealing with the trauma of their illness since I was 17, carrying this weight in my heart and soul for years, just constantly fighting it. To make things even worse, my other parent is cheating—my brother and I just found out recently. And it wasn't just a one-time thing; it was basically a whole lifestyle, hooking up with all sorts of random people and couples. 🤦👎🙂 Can you even imagine what that does to a person? I mean, I don't think anyone could. Losing all trust in your own parent... the shame is so overwhelming that I'm losing my grip on everything. I don't even know who I am anymore or what I'm even living for.

My husband—he avoids me like the plague. He's always hanging out with his buddies or buried in work. There's just zero room for me in his life. When we are together in bed, it's maybe 30 minutes to an hour at most. And I mean—nothing. Usually, it's just right before sleep, then boom, lights out.

Friends—I barely have any. Most of them are either married or tied up with boyfriends/girlfriends. They're all living these "normal" lives. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here wondering where my life is even headed. Where am I supposed to find the strength? What am I even fighting for? I try to meet new people, try to socialize, try to build a career... but for what? I'm working like a dog for nothing.
I keep asking myself if I should go see a therapist, if that would even help. I've gone to self-help seminars, read all the books... but something always comes along to shake me up, and I just can't break free from these problems. Every single part of my life is just a constant cycle of chaos. 🙄👎🤔🙂
What am I supposed to do?!

The parent you're worrying about isn't your responsibility—that's on whoever made those vows in good times and bad. As for your husband and family, you need to carve out time to actually talk and work on the relationship; if there's no respect, then you walk. At work, you've gotta fight for yourself—either demand what you're worth or move on.
The reason you feel like you're failing at life is because you've put everyone else ahead of yourself—your parents, your husband, your coworkers, your boss... everyone. You've left nothing for you. Want to know a secret? Everyone else will be just fine without you... they just don't step up because they don't have to, since you're busy fixing everything for them. If you don't realize this and start focusing on yourself, you're going to end up totally burnt out. Trust me, I've been there, and it happened to me too... but today I'm smarter, I've got money, and I'm happy.
Do intrusive thoughts actually matter? in Psychology & Therapy ·
wanderinggull11 said:Hey everyone, thanks for getting back to me. Today at work, my thoughts were hitting so hard I actually felt physically weak. Had to take some Advil, but even that didn't help. Did I get anything done? Who knows. It’s just this constant loop. For the past few days, I've been stuck in this headspace where I genuinely feel like I want out. It’s moved past thinking; it’s become a feeling. I feel like I want this, and I don't know how to flip the switch. All those logical reasons I used to give myself to stay—they're all falling apart. I'm left with nothing. My mind keeps racing toward the future, but I have zero goals. I was at the gym today just feeling like a dead weight. No motivation. Nothing brings me joy anymore. Even grabbing coffee with coworkers feels exhausting; I just sit there in silence because I have no patience left. This started as a trivial thought I dismissed as nonsense, but it haunted me for days until it turned into this deep-seated certainty. I can't talk myself out of it anymore. I saw a therapist today and vented for an hour, but they just sat there nodding. It didn't make me feel any better. It gets to the point where I hate myself. I feel completely incapable. It’s like I truly want to die, and meanwhile, every reason I had to live is evaporating—especially since the things I used to care about don't matter to me anymore. Honestly, I doubt my girlfriend would even care what state I'm in. How am I supposed to prove to myself that I won't go through with it? I try to tell myself "it's just thoughts," but it goes deeper than that. It's a gut feeling now. It's crawled inside me.

If you can't figure out a way to manage these intrusive thoughts, you're probably going to need ongoing therapy and maybe work with a psychiatrist. You've got to dig into those underlying emotions and feelings that trigger that urge by breaking them down...

OCD is such a nasty beast because it's so hard to separate who you are from what you're thinking. You start identifying with the thoughts, the thoughts create these intense feelings, and then you just lose yourself in the middle of it. How far down the rabbit hole you go really depends on the person, but people who wait too long to get help or get too caught up in the spiral can end up in a really dark place. I don't mean to freak you out, but you really have to put in the work and find a method to keep this under control. Usually, it takes a long time for OCD symptoms to subside once they show up... it only starts to lift once you face and resolve whatever is deeply bothering you inside... and that takes time...
Do intrusive thoughts actually matter? in Psychology & Therapy ·
wanderinggull11 said:Here I am. I feel absolutely terrible. I have zero motivation left for anything. These thoughts have completely drained my willpower. They aren't just passing thoughts anymore—they’ve turned into actual feelings, and they've finally convinced me that this is what I want. My God, what have I gotten myself into? Maybe I'm having a psychotic break if I'm feeling this certain.

Man, you really stepped in it...😁
Just kidding, obviously. Look, you know these unwanted thoughts have been circling your head for a while now. Anyone who deals with obsessive thoughts knows how messy and exhausting this fight is—it's hard to tell if they're just empty, nasty intrusive thoughts popping up because you're having a rough time, or if they're actually what you truly think about yourself. It's super tough to distinguish, which is why OCD is such a nightmare to live through... Just remember, always, they are just thoughts. Nothing more. Those unpleasant thoughts take center stage and trigger those raw emotions that make you feel terrified, making you think this experience is an inseparable part of who you are. But thoughts shift, and feelings shift too... You're just stuck in a nasty phase where you're giving these thoughts and feelings way too much weight, so they just keep spiraling because they scare you so much.

So, first thing's first: try to figure out when these thoughts show up—like when you're feeling down, sad, guilty about something, annoyed by someone, worried you won't make it in your career, scared of losing something, or even just bored and restless... Once you spot the pattern, it gets a little easier to handle because you can see when the "storm" usually hits and start prepping. Honestly, the best move is to just ignore them. For me, I know those thoughts hit hardest when I'm feeling depressed, so when they start creeping in, I go do something else—grab a coffee, get lost in a hobby, and just tune out the garbage in my head. Or I just tell myself, "So what?" I'm definitely not the first person to have dark thoughts or feel like everything is falling apart... You just have to find your own way to soothe yourself.

Obsessive, uncomfortable thoughts usually stem from something deep down that we just can't stomach. Like fear of death, fear of being helpless, anxiety about whether we're "good enough" in a sexual sense (like sexual OCD), fear of getting sick, or the dread of failing at life...

The root is really about a deep struggle to accept ourselves—specifically those darker parts of our personality, the inability to express bad emotions, or drifting away from reality. You've gotta realize we're all human, and we all carry a ton of baggage inside. You're just a person like anyone else, and you need to accept all that negative stuff as just a normal part of life. Don't overthink it too much... just embrace yourself and life as it comes. You don't have to follow some perfect script of getting married and starting a family if that's not your path, you don't have to be happy and successful 24/7, and you definitely shouldn't beat yourself up over failures—those are just part of being alive...

Hope that helps a little. If it doesn't, and the thoughts keep getting louder and more intense, please reach out to a psychiatrist or get into therapy to talk through whatever is eating at you. Better to do it sooner rather than later before things spiral into a psychosis or you withdraw so far into yourself that you can't function in daily life...
Issues with girls. in Psychology & Therapy ·
So, when you’re right there with a girl and you know it’s time to lean in for a kiss—or maybe get a little more intimate—what's actually stopping you? Like, what is that specific thing you're afraid of? Just take a second to really look inward... what’s running through your head in those moments? What are the actual fears or desires popping up...

If you’ve never even kissed a girl before, honestly, it’s probably just that nerves-induced fear of messing it up. And hey, when it comes to that first time, being a total nervous wreck is completely normal—we've all been there, trust me. Just try to chill out, go with the flow, and things will work themselves out...
Besides, you guys are way too young for anything beyond kissing and hanging out...
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:It seems like Galup is lying, yet Donna White50 from the American forums apparently knows exactly how things stand.

I also have no idea where you got that bit about monkeys; it has nothing to do with healthy brain function. Homosexuality has been observed in many animal species, but it isn't a standard behavioral rule—it’s an exception. Bisexuality occurs more frequently in certain species that enjoy sex beyond just reproduction, but again, it’s not a rule, and it certainly isn't universally applicable to the human race.


Where did I get it? It's common knowledge.

The rise in people being "curious" is a trend that's essentially raping human sexuality—an overexaggeration of diversity driven by interest groups, the LGBT community, the media, and of course, the pornography you mentioned, which they should probably be grateful for.
Pornography has nothing to do with real life, and since prostitution is one of the oldest professions in the world, I don't see an issue with people charging for their acting services in that context. My issue lies in the fact that this is served up to young people as if it were accessible, normal, and acceptable.

I don't know, Donna White50, but I can't continue this conversation with you because I find everything you say to be incredibly hypocritical.

You condemn someone for being gay or transgender and openly declaring their identity, yet at the same time, here you casually talk about your BDSM fetishes with someone providing a service... basically a prostitute.

Who do you think you are to lecture me? You are Kinky, and you're open about it....

You would protect your children from someone who is gay or trans, but if you found your kid at home with a closet full of chains, whips, latex, and whatever other gear they use—I don't even know what kind of tools you employ—I wonder how you'd explain to them that it's perfectly fine, that it's lovely, and that Dad likes to tie people up in the basement. Or perhaps explain it to someone providing that service to him.

If it weren't for the freedoms brought by liberalism, you wouldn't be able to tell strangers on the internet how much you care about this stuff.

So, if liberalism gave you that freedom, why do you oppose the rights of a transgender boy who was born that way, whose brain is wired such that he puts on a dress and says he is a woman on the inside?


You want to know what liberalism gave me? A mountain of crap and paraphilias wrapped up in cellophane, disguised as "sexual freedom" and pleasure without any actual boundaries or healthy limits. And now it's being pushed on everyone. You seriously think it's "cool" or okay to be trapped in that? That it's great to be addicted to BDSM stuff because you can't find excitement any other way? That's just a way to live?
It's honestly sad that I even have to bring this up, and it's sad that anyone can just wreck their healthy sexuality like that. If someone looks into certain things or searches online, they'll see everywhere saying it's wrong. Even you know it's wrong for a kid to be exposed to that kind of sexuality, or for someone to pay a dominatrix for their twisted kinks. It isn't "nice," and we should be clear about that and maintain a critical view. If some guy you liked came up to you and said he was Kinky, you'd probably have an issue and send him packing. So why not just apply those same standards to everyone else and these weird trends people are pushing?
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:One really should consider the facts here—chimpanzees sit at the peak of the evolutionary hierarchy within the primate lineage, immediately preceding the genus Homo. Given that we share approximately 98 percent of our DNA with them, they are arguably our closest biological relatives.

If we accept that animals engage in sexual behavior for pleasure rather than just for procreation—including instances of same-sex pairings among both males and females—then I suppose that suggests something significant. It would imply that homosexuality is a natural occurrence within the animal kingdom; and if it is indeed natural for them, maybe it is also natural for us. Therefore, one could argue that when a person is homosexual, they were simply born that way, rather than being shaped by social pressures or external circumstances.

I suppose there is a fundamental necessity to distinguish between what is truly natural and what constitutes pure perversion.

I suppose it isn’t really about homophobia, since the LGBTQ+ community has guaranteed rights here in the States. While I guess some people in certain parts of America might still bristle at the mention of someone being gay, the vast majority of the population seems to accept those orientations without much fuss. I personally have several friends in that community and I don't hold any prejudices against them. However, I find myself opposed to the way this kind of sexuality is being pushed as something trendy or "cool," especially when the media presents LGBTQ+ individuals as role models for the youth. It feels like young people are being exposed to pornography without any meaningful boundaries—including all sorts of modern paraphilias—all while being told that everything is perfectly fine and that everyone has the right to indulge in any sexual expression they choose, regardless of whether it involves paraphilias or not.

What exactly do you mean when you suggest that this kind of sexuality is being openly promoted as something popular and cool?
I suppose one might wonder exactly which groups are involved here, who they are, and what specific methods they use to push their agenda regarding LGBT identity.

Regarding the issue of pornography, I suppose I agree that children ought to be shielded from all forms of it, particularly when it comes to more perverse content.

Modern pornography has drifted incredibly far from the classic adult films we saw back in the 70s and 80s. Nowadays, the content seems to revolve around simulated assault, group scenarios, and increasingly aggressive acts like BDSM or extreme fetishes. I suppose most of these niche categories are specifically produced for hardened addicts who have become desensitized to mainstream material. It seems to me that the more transgressive genres are largely consumed by heterosexual men whose addictions have spiraled out of control, and I suspect this constant exposure causes irreparable damage to their actual sexual health.

I can't say I have an exhaustive list of these depravities at hand, though I hear enough about them from industry veterans to get the gist. I remember the first time I caught myself pitying one of those girls—wondering what exactly went wrong in her life that led her to film adult content. I found myself thinking about how she was once just a little girl playing with Barbies, dreaming about the future, and wondering where her parents were to guide her, or why she didn't just find a job as a waitress instead. It is difficult... when you look at a depersonalized human being, reduced merely to physical orifices under the glare of studio lights, and see a lost soul caught in the vortex of time... how does one even continue watching someone sell their dignity for money without feeling a sense of profound sadness?

I don't think anyone is actually discriminating against homosexuality, but I can't help but wonder why it feels like it's being constantly shoved down everyone's throats through the media and the education system. I suppose one has to ask why a mere 5 or 10 percent of the population should have the leverage to push their specific ideologies onto everyone else, forcing the rest of us to just blindly accept it regardless of the potential consequences of such teaching and behavior.

Maybe it's not quite 5 or 10 percent? Based on that Galup anecdote from 2002, about 22 percent of people in the USA identified as homosexual.

If you look at other minority groups that frequently face discrimination, the latest census shows that African Americans make up about 12 percent of the American population.

The Jew population in the USA is roughly 2 percent. I guess if you compare those figures, you can draw your own conclusions about what's really happening here.

Those stats are completely off. The LGBT population in the USA is actually around 4.1% of the total population.
Also, I have no idea where you got that bit about monkeys, because it has nothing to do with having a healthy brain. Homosexuality is observed in many animal species, but it isn't a rule of behavior—it's an exception. Bisexuality happens more often in certain species that enjoy sex beyond just reproduction, but again, it's not a standard rule, especially not applied to the human race.
The rise in people claiming to be "curious" is just a trend of forcing human sexuality into new shapes—an exaggeration of diversity driven by interest groups, the LGBT community, the media, and of course, the porn industry, which probably thanks them for the business.
Pornography isn't real life, and since prostitution is one of the oldest trades in the world, I don't see a problem with people getting paid for their acting services in that sense. My issue is when this stuff is served up to young people as if it's totally normal and acceptable.
I remember vividly consuming pornographic material when I was only 7 or 8 years old. I know how that affected me. I remember how hard it used to be to even stumble upon a picture of breasts or genitals in the media, but today? Not at all. Society is so over-sexualized to the point where it's become a global sickness that we aren't even aware of.
You only have to look at the comments on this forum regarding a girl who's 18 and has never even kissed anyone, let alone had sex or an orgasm, or had a boyfriend... and you'll see it clearly. That's all there is to our "tolerance"—it's only called tolerance as long as it serves someone's interests, otherwise, it's just thrown out the window...

Who’s actually pushing this whole gender ideology thing? Who's out there advocating for the right to basically any kind of sexual expression imaginable—aside from pedophilia, which is obviously a crime, though honestly, I can't help but wonder why we even bother when it's been part of human history since the beginning of time🤦—and who's promoting BDSM, which at its core is just another type of paraphilia... seriously, do you even watch the news, flip through a paper, or spend any time online? Or do I really need to start dropping links for you tomorrow...
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:I suppose fluidity is just part of our inherent nature. Research seems to suggest it's less pronounced in men than in women, though it remains a variable that can be activated in anyone, regardless of whether pornography is involved or not.

One could argue that we aren't nearly as binary as what Jesus taught us, especially when you consider the chimpanzee and its smaller cousin, the bonobo, with whom we share about 98 percent of our DNA.

I suppose others are just engaging in their second day of aimless fooling around because they have nothing better to occupy their time. People don't just engage in sex for procreation; they do it for pleasure and enjoyment, which makes me think that perhaps almost everyone is bisexual to some degree. I guess what I'm trying to say is that this isn't some depraved act conditioned by pornography or something gifted by Satan, despite what you might believe.

At the end of the day, the focus is just on having fun, so I suppose I don't really see how that could possibly lead to an apocalypse.

I suppose I find the environment in which my child grows up to be an incredibly significant matter, much like the surroundings we all inhabit—whether that concerns nutrition, health, daily habits, the workplace, education, or sexuality. It matters deeply to me because I am under the impression that people are remarkably susceptible to manipulation, and there is a constant risk that the media might attempt to brainwash the public with various agendas, all while masking them under the guise of progress, freedom, the future, success, or wealth.
It’s people like you who get under my skin the most—those who live by the hollow mantra that everyone should just be allowed to do whatever they want. I suppose such a mindset is fundamentally devoid of any real thought or sense of responsibility toward the future.

I’m not entirely sure how you managed to draw a connection between your child's safety and the supposed threat posed by homosexual, bisexual, or transgender individuals. I suppose I just don't follow your logic. It isn't as if we are dealing with an aggressive population; if anything, these are mostly people who face systemic violence both here in the States and in the regions further south and east of us.

When it comes to homosexuality, I suppose everyone should have the right to do whatever they please behind closed doors, as that is a matter of private conduct, and these individuals certainly possess their own rights just like anyone else. However, I don't think anyone has the right to promote such a lifestyle as being correct or desirable, especially when this way of thinking conflicts with our basic biological nature and is pushed upon the public without any accountability for the consequences.

It isn’t really about promoting anything; I suppose the core issue here is discrimination based on sexual orientation, which really ought to end. That seems to be exactly what you're doing, though—treating them like they're sick or somehow a threat to your child.

Maybe this trend toward bisexuality isn't inherently catastrophic at first glance, though I suppose it becomes an issue if we consider that people with that orientation often lean toward more promiscuous behavior; furthermore, the stability of family life and children is inextricably linked to our sexual orientation. I imagine you wouldn't be particularly happy either if you met a partner, had a child with them, and then discovered they had a boyfriend because they were suddenly feeling a bit more gay than usual...

It really just comes down to finding someone else. I guess there isn't much of a difference. One might argue that betrayal is always betrayal, regardless of gender... but since I'm not particularly prone to jealousy, perhaps it doesn't matter all that much.

All of this is simply the price we pay for being intoxicated by individual freedom and a lifestyle devoid of responsibility. Just because your concern hurts doesn't necessarily mean you're right...

I feel like you're demonizing what is essentially a benign, joyful activity like sex just a little too much.

Regarding the adult film industry, I suppose I don't have anything against those old, innocent clips featuring some blonde pizza delivery guy in shorts whom Helga and Elsa want to tip with a little something extra, but I am certainly against the repulsive perversions currently trending, as well as the fact that these videos are now so easily accessible to young people who build their entire perception of women and intimacy based on them.


What do humans and monkeys have to do with this? It sounds like you just picked the species that fits your narrative best...🤦

It’s not even about homophobia because the LGBT community has guaranteed rights here in the US. Sure, in some pockets of America, people still get worked up if they hear someone is gay, but most of the population accepts people with those orientations without any issue. I hang out with a few of them myself and I don't have any prejudices. However, I *am* against the public promotion of that kind of sexuality as being "cool" or "trendy," or using the media to present LGBT people as role models for kids. I also don't like how young people are exposed to porn without any limits—including all sorts of paraphilias—while simultaneously being told it’s all perfectly fine and that everyone has the right to enjoy their sexuality no matter what, including those extreme kinks...
Pornography has drifted so far away from those cheesy movies from the 70s and 80s. Now, scenes are basically rape simulations, or they're mostly group stuff, anal, rough sex, bukkake, BDSM, trans content, and endless variations of that. Honestly, all these niche categories are mostly filmed for hardcore porn addicts who can't get high enough off the standard stuff anymore. Those trans categories are mostly watched by straight men who have gone way too far down the rabbit hole of addiction, and that kind of exposure does irreparable damage to their sexual health.

When it comes to kids, I’m totally against pushing things like boys wearing skirts—you know, all that messaging about how being gay is "cool," giving them LGBTQ+ figures as role models, or just this general push to feminize boys as part of some woke agenda. Kids are incredibly easy to influence, and they just soak up whatever is served to them without questioning it...

Look, nobody is out here discriminating against being gay, but why does it feel like it's constantly being shoved down everyone's throats through the media and the school system? Why does a small group—maybe 5 or 10% of the population—get to force their specific worldview on everyone else, leaving the rest of us to just blindly accept it regardless of how it affects how kids learn and act..?
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Joseph Bailey41 said:Donna White50, you were raised with more traditional values, back before the era of Pornhub, and you've still experimented with some more exotic sexual practices yourself. Why on earth do you think your child's environment is going to have such a decisive impact on them?

Look, I experimented because I grew up in a totally messed up family—I was just trying to escape all the humiliation and drama, you know? It’s the same reason most kids today run toward booze, drugs, crime, gambling, or porn... I stumbled onto porn when I was maybe 7 or 8, so I know firsthand how much it messed with my head. And seeing kids today with smartphones in their hands at that age, having instant access to all that stuff? It's intense...
I’ve tried everything under the sun, and yeah, I got burned a few times—but I learned a hell of a lot from it. When I see kids nowadays with no jobs, no family support, no real vision for the future, and they're being sold this idea that porn or gambling is "freedom" or an escape from their problems... it actually breaks my heart. I know it because I see how many people end up growing into adults who are just completely emotionally and sexually dysfunctional. It’s sad, but it’s the reality...
My kid is going to soak up whatever is around them, and that’s how they’ll build their own worldview. If the values out there are twisted and society is acting sick, that’s exactly what’s going to rub off on my child. Most people just take the path of least resistance... you are what you surround yourself with, always has been, always will be...
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:Well, no... being fluid doesn't mean it's shaped from the outside; I guess it just means it can shift over a lifetime or perhaps even change within a couple of weeks.

It is entirely up to you whether you want to slap labels of degeneracy on everything based on your own value system—but personally, I find it perfectly natural not to care what anyone else does with their genitals, who they touch, or whether someone feels like a man or a woman internally regardless of their anatomy.

If you don't care what car someone buys, what school they graduate from, or whether they decide to play sports, then I suppose it is strange that you are so bothered by someone engaging in sexual activities that you wouldn't personally choose.

Between consuming pornography and the media constantly pushing this agenda, it seems this group is becoming sexually unhealthy, struggling with identity, which eventually leads to issues in their sex lives, family building, and raising children...

Is there perhaps a specific study, some concrete evidence, or any actual statistics suggesting that being gay makes someone ill or causes the specific problems you mentioned?

But whatever, it's all "cool," and apparently to such an extent that transvestites have become role models because, as you say, they can be more feminine than the average woman. And the fact that their lives often end up in prostitution doesn't matter either; I suppose that’s just the new desirable standard since many women monetize themselves one way or another anyway... it's become the new behavioral model, I guess.
And of course, you're right, because you embrace these modern liberal trends and simply don't care about the consequences...

I never actually said they were role models or sexier than the average woman; I merely suggested they can be fascinating.

I wonder, what exactly is so unsettling about ladyboys to you?

I am not calling you a homophobe—heaven forbid, I don't know you well enough as a fellow forum user to make such a claim—but I will mention something regarding homophobia so you don't think I am targeting you specifically...

In one study involving a penis, a group of homophobic men was given a small paper band, similar to a control group of straight men, and they were shown various short clips, including occasional scenes of sex between two men. In every single case involving the homophobes, the paper band snapped. Because of an erection, I guess... so, you get the idea.

Fluid sexuality is exactly that—it's something that changes based on your environment or personal experiences. Think about what shaped your views on what kind of guys you're attracted to—body types, hair color, certain vibes, or even fantasies you have while you're solo because of something you saw or felt... if you're wired toward fetishes, you link them to pleasure, whether it's a certain look, muscles, a piece of clothing, or even something more intense...

You want examples of how things like porn affect young people? Here you go:
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/are-fetishes-innate
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/ask-...ay-transsexual
https://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1453...6ace54af28be99

To me, it's incredibly important what kind of environment my child grows up in, or honestly, any of us—whether it's food, health, habits, work, education, or sexuality. It matters to me because I know how easily people can be manipulated, and how the media can basically brainwash everyone under the guise of "progress," "freedom," or "success."
Honestly, people like you really get on my nerves—those who live by the motto "everyone should just do whatever they want"—because that kind of thinking is just totally lacking in reflection and responsibility toward the future.

When it comes to homosexuality, sure, everyone has the right to do whatever they want in their own bedroom, and they have the same rights as everyone else. But nobody has the right to push that lifestyle as the "correct" or desirable way to live, especially when it clashes with our biological foundation and people end up poisoning the public discourse without considering the consequences. Maybe the bisexual trend isn't a huge deal at first glance, but it is if we consider that such sexualities often lean toward promiscuity, and the whole issue of family and kids is tied directly to sexual orientation. And I bet even you wouldn't be happy if you met a partner, had a kid with them, and then found out tomorrow they had a boyfriend... and that they're, well, a little more gay than usual...

Honestly, some of what the homophobes are saying actually hits home sometimes—mostly because so many people who identify as gay or bisexual are genuinely struggling to accept who they are. You’ll hear people say they shouldn't exist, but the reality is that so many of them just want a family and kids... they're often heteroromantic, or they're dealing with the fallout from porn addiction, paraphilias, or past trauma. It’s just sad, really—these are people stuck with a sexuality they can't escape even if they desperately wanted to. A life and an identity wrecked by porn addiction or being brainwashed into gender reassignment carries the same weight as a young life ruined by drugs or alcoholism in the States. These people lose their shot at a normal life, a career, or a family, and that’s just tragic—regardless of how "cool" or progressive you think it all is, or how much you care about being inclusive... And it gets even worse if we give them adoption rights, because then you're basically passing that struggle down to the next generation. Just look at how many people in America deal with impotence or infertility, or how much money the pharmaceutical and porn industries rake in, and it starts to make sense. It's the price we pay for being so obsessed with individual freedom and living lives without any real responsibility... Just because you feel bad about it doesn't mean you're right...
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:I don't quite follow... I don't recall mentioning fertility, nor am I sure how the survival of the species relates to anything I actually wrote.

Indirectly, yeah—it all lines up with this twisted modern science claiming everyone is basically bisexual, that being genderfluid or gay is the new "cool," and that we should all be striving for that kind of sexuality. They love pushing the idea that sexuality is totally fluid, shaped by whatever external stuff you're exposed to that links up with pleasure... Basically, if you read the newspapers, this whole obsession with queer culture makes it look like we're dealing with a sexually unhealthy group struggling with identity, which eventually bleeds into issues with relationships, starting families, and raising kids...
But hey, whatever, it’s all "cool" now, right? It’s gotten to the point where transvestites are practically the role models to follow, especially since—as you put it—they can be more feminine than the average woman. And who cares if their lives mostly end up revolving around prostitution? That’s totally fine and even desirable these days... plenty of women monetize themselves one way or another, so I guess that’s become the new standard for behavior...
And of course, you're totally right because you're just riding those modern liberal trends while completely ignoring the fallout—that's clearly not your problem...
Anyway, here, enjoy the "sex appeal":
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Chris Williams said:1. I don't find it particularly likely that any hardened, traditionalist American man would suddenly lose his edge just because he meets a man without a mustache.

2. I suspect that sexuality is somewhat fluid; while most of us are defined by that binary split as heterosexual regarding gender, eroticism is something a large number of people can feel toward both their own sex and the opposite sex.

3. In my view, trans women and men are quite attractive, and certain trans women personally fascinate me and I find them irresistible, perhaps because they seem to possess the best qualities of both sexes—the strength of a man combined with the softness of a woman. It’s a sense of completeness that I personally find appealing, though mostly just visually... well, maybe a little bit more than that.

It isn't really surprising that in various cultures throughout history, and even today, individuals who manifest both genders were respected; they were often automatically granted shamanic roles within a tribe and viewed as divine beings, being called upon for weddings and other ceremonies to provide their blessing.

Also, biologically speaking, trans people who undergo transition are infertile and can't have kids, so you can be happy about whatever you want at this point...
Crazy Talk Thread in Psychology ·
Brandon Lopez6 said:If that's true, then why is religion still such a massive thing?
Is a delusion somehow more acceptable just because it’s widespread instead of individual?

If not, then why not?
What's really the difference between believing in God or an Alien?

And one last thing—why is believing in Aliens treated like some kind of psychosis or losing touch with reality, while believing in God gets a free pass?

-

Alright, you guys wanted "expert topics," so please, go ahead and teach me something 🙂.


People who are truly religious find their sense of purpose and meaning through God pretty easily—they also believe that when life hits them hard, God has a plan or a specific path laid out for them. That's why for most people, faith isn't just about buildings, rituals, or icons... it's a necessity. Personally, I'm just not a religious person, and honestly, I feel like much of Western civilization has messed people up by stripping spirituality right out of their lives. The downside of belief, though, is how easily it leads to manipulation... I mean, people have started wars in the name of God, which is just pure stupidity, and honestly, more people have died over religious reasons than almost anything else, but yeah...
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
velvetcobra65 said:Hmm, Radical, I’m not so sure I agree with you regarding how much porn actually drives the acceptance of trans identity, cross-dressing, or even just plastic surgery. It wasn't fifty years ago, but maybe thirty years back, Brigitte Nielsen was one of the most obvious examples of someone with implants. I don't think men were reacting with a massive "ew, look at her, she's a mess" vibe. To me, it feels more like demand was driving the supply when it comes to things like silicone, rather than the other way around.
As for cross-dressing and being trans—honestly, plenty of cultures throughout history have had their own versions of drag, trans identities, or specific roles for people. Everyone seemed to have their own designated spot in society, whether it was religious, cultural, or whatever.
One thing I find interesting is that when people talk about this topic, they almost always focus on male-to-female transitions. But there's a pretty significant number of people born female who feel like men. Are they not considered a threat? 😁

Every aesthetic trend follows its own path... Basically, the first woman to get implants did it because she knew guys are into bigger breasts... then the trend slowly picks up steam and goes to the extreme. There were so many women pumping up their breasts and lips to impossible levels just because, you know, it was important to stand out. Nowadays, getting work done everywhere on the body has become so mainstream that most women don't even like their natural look anymore—they want smaller waists, lifted breasts, bigger butts, plump lips... honestly, nowadays if you aren't some kind of bimbo, pardon my French, a "sex worker," or just a woman hyper-aware of her sexuality, you can't win. So, basically, it's about instilling complexes in young people and then profiting from them. It's the same deal with sexuality. If you expose a 15-year-old to nothing but porn, fetishes, and perversions—when you strip away healthy sexual role models and don't let them define their own sexuality—you end up with someone facing real issues, like sexual deviations.
Trans identity was never considered "normal" or desirable before, but today it's presented that way and people accept it as such. Some people make money off it, some get famous, and unfortunately, some get screwed over, ending up with mental and sexual struggles...
I’ve dealt with fetishes, BDSM, and porn in my life, so I know exactly what I’m talking about. I know what can trigger a person and how volatile our sexuality really is. It's scary how easy it is to brainwash someone, and how powerful sexuality is as a tool in the hands of those looking to turn a profit...

Betty Fowler said:It’s funny, isn't it? It’s just as interesting when people criticize straight men and then turn around to complain about discrimination because they feel we don't view them as "real women." As if our own sexuality is somehow something that needs to be corrected.

I'm not entirely sure how much truth there is to this. I suppose I could agree that women like that wouldn't be interested. Ideal. At that stage, I doubt they'd have any trouble finding someone to flirt with them.

Man, she was such a knockout in Rocky. It’s a bit of a shame to see how much things have changed since then. 👎

Not really, man... You'd go for the girl with the implants because she triggers that sense of arousal and eroticism for you, right? Because that's the image you associate it with. Back in the day, sex appeal was tied to natural beauty and feminine sensuality. People would have found it super weird—if not outright repulsive—back then, just like how many people see trans people as repulsive today... But that'll change too. I guarantee you in 20 or 30 years, it won't matter anymore. People will stop caring about what's "natural" or what someone looks like; most people will identify as bisexual, women will look less and less like themselves, and men will follow suit. Getting work done will be as routine as getting a haircut or going shopping... if you don't, people might give you side-eye just because you have a natural nose when you could have a "better" one from a clinic...

Honestly, looking at how most young people identify as bisexual these days—it’s clearly not some biological shift. It’s more about learned behaviors and social conditioning, which just backs up the whole idea that sexuality is pretty fluid... I mean, sure, a small percentage of gay folks are born that way, but for most people, they'll lean into these identities if it's presented to them in a way that feels "normal" or socially acceptable. To take it to a ridiculous extreme—if someone tried to claim our sexual preferences were tied to sheep, people would probably end up doing some pretty weird stuff with them just to fit the narrative...

https://yougov.co.uk/news/2015/08/16...-heterosexual/
A deep dive into attraction to trans people in Psychology ·
Richard Nelson84 said:In my previous post, I laid out what I believe drives our sexual preferences. And look, I stand by that. What I don't buy is the idea that someone can live their entire life as strictly heterosexual and then suddenly wake up one day as homosexual. Or vice versa. It just doesn't work like that. My take? Either they weren't fully aware of that other side of their sexuality, or they were actively pushing it down.

It’s the exact same deal when it comes to attraction toward trans people. The stigma surrounding the trans community is way more intense than what gay men face. Just imagine how many guys will actually feel brave enough to explore that side of their sexuality. There won't be many, right?

I see this same argument popping up over and over in different threads. Is it really that hard to wrap your head around? Some men are attracted to trans women, and it’s just that. It doesn't mean it's turned into some weird fetish or some "deviant" way of being sexual. It's just attraction!

Men might pass on it, but I wouldn't bet against a single straight guy feeling an attraction to trans women.

First you say straight men won't be attracted to trans women, then you claim they will. You can't have it both ways!

If a trans woman is upfront about who she is from the very beginning, I actually think that’s an advantage for building a relationship. It lets the man decide right away if he wants to get involved or not.

No man is going to think, hey, you're a guy instead he's thinking, hey, you used to be a guy. Depending on how things are handled, that's how the relationship will go.

You can't just generalize your own view to every single man out there. Not everyone thinks like you do. Since trans people make up such a tiny fraction of the population, there's likely a similarly small group of straight men who find themselves attracted to trans women.


All these new theories about sexuality they're trying to push through those super liberal circles lately... it's interesting, I guess. But honestly, you can't just shift your orientation around on a scale like that—you're born a certain way and that’s pretty much set in stone. I mean, if someone suddenly finds themselves into certain homoerotic fetishes during a specific phase of life, it doesn't mean they "changed"... it just means those feelings were always there, lurking in the background, just waiting for the right moment to surface once they finally saw something that clicked... turns out it was just suppressed all along...
You’ve got it all wrong... Let me give you a real-world example—would an American guy under 50 actually be interested in a woman who's basically been completely reshaped by plastic surgery? Probably not. It's not just about being "attractive"—it's that those looks usually deviate so far from what's traditionally considered sexually appealing. But look at the reality today—men are constantly consuming content featuring women like that. There's been this massive shift in how we perceive sexuality and what counts as "hot." It’s the exact same thing when you look at homosexuality or being transgender. People have this inherent curiosity, right? They're open to new experiences, and if they find pleasure and satisfaction through those avenues, sexuality is naturally going to gravitate toward whatever provides that gratification... it's how that drive gets satisfied. It happens all the time—people develop specific fetishes just by being exposed to certain types of media that are marketed as being sexually enticing. Transgender individuals often work really hard to emulate that hyper-feminine, eroticized ideal because they know it grabs attention—it taps into that curiosity and drives more liberal, experimental people to take action...

I don't get why some straight guys act like seeing a dick between someone else's legs is such a huge deal—regardless of how great the boobs or the ass might look... I mean, honestly, that kind of reaction doesn't exactly scream "straight" to me. Sure, someone can be super attractive right up until the moment a guy realizes what's actually going on down there. But let’s be real—if you take the penis out of the equation, that person probably has a much better shot with a curious guy. Like I was saying, people eventually get used to anything, especially if it's wrapped up in something erotic and visually appealing...

Is there any chance a straight guy ends up with a trans person? Sure, there’s always a chance—just like how even a mentally healthy person can spiral into depression, or how someone who's had a few too many drinks might do something they normally wouldn't, or how a guy driven by pure impulse might just take whatever opportunity comes his way... at the end of the day, exceptions just prove the rule, right? And honestly, this whole idea that attraction is some rigid thing is kind of silly. We get drawn to people for all sorts of reasons that don't always have anything to do with gender—sometimes it's because they're gorgeous, powerful, successful, or just famous... though, I guess actually sleeping with them is a different story altogether...