Posts by Kenneth Brown5

Jason Ortiz5 said:The thing is, this whole mess wouldn't even be happening if it wasn't for all those things you mentioned that belong in a different thread. So...

Nobody is actually calling for isolating kids here. But let's be real—the teacher's own actions are what created this awkward situation in the first place. Borrowing money from a kid? That’s a huge red flag and definitely doesn't excuse the lapses in judgment that led us here. On top of that, she’s now demanding the cash back without even checking with the parents first to see if it was okay to borrow it in the first place.

Honestly, I really dislike it when people try to back others into a corner like this. It feels rude, arrogant, and pretty condescending. To me, it mostly just says a lot about the person doing it...

The teacher caught my mom's mistake, and honestly, there’s really no point in getting all worked up over "what ifs" or playing the blame game, so let's just stick to what actually happened—there's no sense in making a big deal out of nothing!

Even his teacher didn't quite see the writing on the wall, because the little guy mentioned earlier that they were heading out to Taco Bell tonight.

If I were stepping into that mother's shoes, honestly, I’d probably be feeling just as torn as she is, kind of like trying to pick between saving a few bucks at Target or making sure everyone's happy with a fancy dinner. It’s such a tricky spot to be in, you know?

feralmoose4 said:Seriously, what kind of world are you living in? What's its name?

It’s called the land of everyone being left out except for you, but hey,🙄

What's actually bothering you about how I see things?

Jason Ortiz5 said:I mean, you’d think it’s pretty obvious to any teacher that kids actually need to eat to function, right? It’s not like they can run on fumes all day. 😕 She totally blew the whole thing. Honestly, she could've had enough sense and tact to not mess it up so completely.

I’ve already said this, but if I ever felt like I couldn't—or just didn't want to—cover those extra costs for my kid, I wouldn't even send them. Or I'd just lend them the cash. Honestly, the whole situation we're dealing with here would never have been an option for me. If they're broke, kids usually pick up on that vibe pretty early anyway, so there really wasn't any need to make such a big deal out of it.

So, if a parent can't swing a trip to McDonald's, does that mean they shouldn't bother taking their kid to a museum either? Like, is a museum visit without a Happy Meal even considered "educational" or "cultured"? Does a trip to the museum basically require a stop at McDonald's just to count as part of the school curriculum or something?

Borrowing money just to buy something totally useless is actually a great parenting lesson, if you think about it. It sets such a clear example for kids. Not to mention all the snarky comments from adults that are bound to follow later: "Oh, look at that—can't even pay the electric bill on time, but suddenly there's cash to buy a kid a Happy Meal at McDonald's..." ☕ Honestly, we really are a wonderful bunch. If you don't have anything going for you, everyone just jumps at the chance to screw you over from every single angle. You can always count on someone finding something to pick at. ☕

Look, I don't think you even need to bring up the fact that money is tight. Honestly, does anyone even need to point out when they're doing well? In America, showing off your success isn't really seen as a bad thing—it’s actually pretty normal, maybe even encouraged. It's just part of the culture here. 🙄Why can't we just accept whether we have money or not as a plain old fact? It feels like everyone is constantly trying to force things, either obsessing over amassing more or desperately trying to manufacture wealth out of thin air. Why not just roll with whatever the bank balance says and stop stressing?

And who exactly in this scenario is bragging about having money? Is it the other parents who already paid for the bus and the McDonald's?

Yeah, clearly the most important thing is what the neighbors will think about the mom🙄, so she was probably terrified they'd judge her if she even paid for that. It’s not like anyone cares how he actually felt in the moment☕

Now everyone is acting like the McDonald's trip was some useless extra, but for me, it's not about the burgers. Would things have been different if they had gone to the Griffith Observatory later and had to pay an entrance fee $6.75?

If he was going to go, he should have just gone all in instead of doing it in a way that draws attention to himself and puts him in such an uncomfortable spot.

feralmoose4 said:Because it’s embarrassing?

It’s not even about embarrassment, it’s more like it’s just way harder for a little kid to deal with all that pressure when they're feeling singled out.🤷

copperheron18 said:Regarding that infamous trip to McDonald's—look, sure, the mother didn't realize the teacher was taking the kids out. But honestly? It feels like she knew perfectly well that the cost would be roughly the same whether she bought the kid a $6.75 Happy Meal or packed up sandwiches, snacks, and juice at home. I mean, if a child is on a field trip lasting about eight hours, it’s a mathematical certainty they’re going to get hungry, right? When you weigh the price of a Happy Meal against the cost of prepping homemade food, we're looking at nearly the same ballpark. Maybe it's a few extra dollars here or there, but let's not start an endless debate over those negligible $1.75 differences... 🤷

But like, it says right above that she had already bought everything for the sandwiches, so she just didn't want to shell out extra cash for McDonald's since the teacher hadn't given them enough notice about the stop.

Jason Ortiz5 said:The truth is, kids feel the weight of their family's finances whether we want them to or not, simply because they see what their classmates can afford. The real question is: should we be teaching them that it's shameful not to have enough cash for everything (especially when this specific thing is totally useless)? Should a mom have to go into debt just so a teacher doesn't end up having to tell the class, "Hey, even sandwiches are a luxury"? Should parents have to fund every single school whim just so a kid doesn't feel the gap between those who have it easy and those who don't? Honestly, instead of hiding the struggle, isn't it better to teach a child that there's no shame in living honestly on what you've got?

I really feel like this could've been handled way differently if someone had just told the teacher the little guy would be bringing his own lunch; why do we all just assume she didn't care about the situation?

Like I mentioned before, if I ever felt like I couldn't swing those extra costs or simply didn't want to jump through those hoops just to keep up appearances, I'd never send my kid, or maybe I'd just borrow what was needed, but the whole mess happening here just wouldn't be something I'd entertain. If a family is struggling, the kids usually pick up on that vibe long before anyone makes a scene, so there was really no need to shine a spotlight on it like that.

feralmoose4 said:Burdening them? That's just called reality.
I firmly believe a ten-year-old is more than capable of grasping the situation.

Maybe because of my job, I see too many kids who are clearly aware of their parents' finances, so perhaps I can't be entirely objective 🤷

Of course any decent mother wants the absolute best for her child and doesn't want them to suffer. Show me one sane mom who doesn't feel that way!

But what is a mother supposed to do when she can't even afford a greasy meal at McShit for her kid? Work herself to death? Listen to judgmental comments from outsiders about how she "should have planned better" (yeah, right, because life is a fairy tale) or how she could have magically found the cash?

What does "being equal with the group" even mean to you? What if you aren't even remotely close to that group's standard when it comes to what you can actually afford 😉?

I think you're blowing this out of proportion; the mom literally just said she felt awkward paying extra since her kitchen work was being covered.
To me, a kid deserves to just be a kid, not a little accountant worrying about whether there's enough money in the family bank account.

If I were in those shoes, I'd either borrow the $6.75 or just tell them they couldn't go.

I definitely wouldn't let some rigid personal principle get in the way if it meant watching my kid sit there while all their friends are munching on donuts.😁 Sure, maybe we should've thought ahead about how they'd feel once they actually got there,😢 but honestly, the bottom line is that the kid already understands the reality of the situation at home.👎

feralmoose4 said:Protect him from what, exactly? From people noticing that a certain family can't afford McShit? Or from being teased by other kids?

If you ask me, her son is perfectly aware of their financial situation and the fact they don't have money for nonsense like Mc...

Why should she deny her child the trip just because she can't shell out about $20$10 for something that isn't even necessary (I mean, what kind of "experience" does a trip to McDonald's actually provide?)?

What kind of message are we sending the kid? Basically: "Every time you run short on cash, we’re going to isolate you just to make sure nobody hurts your feelings."

I completely agree with Luna!

This isn't even about the money—it's about the principle!

And Kimberly Robinson2, I'm with you on your last post too; I also don't see why a child needs to see and have everything.

Hold up, are you seriously saying it's okay to weigh a kid down with the family's financial stress and expect a little one to carry that burden?

That's exactly what I meant by protecting him. We aren't talking about a new iPhone, sneakers, or summer camp here, we're talking about $6.75.

Personally, I wouldn't let a rigid principle come before my kid; I'd try my best to make sure they feel just as included as everyone else in the group.

We can go back and forth about field trips all day, but honestly, I think the real issue is that Mom knew they were hitting up McDonald's the night before and should’ve seen this coming.
Either he stays home or she hands over the cash—there really isn't a middle ground there if you want to look out for him.

It feels like Mom is feeling pretty guilty right now, so she's trying to pin the blame on the teacher, even though she could have planned ahead the night before.

From where I'm standing, the teacher handled a messy situation as best as anyone could, and it's just not fair to let the little guy carry all this stress; everything landed on his shoulders, so Mom and the teacher should probably just settle it between themselves.

I finally got Katja's card in the mail this morning🙏, now I just need to track down a little prayer book👍

It actually got me thinking about what to grab for my younger sister🙂, what kind of stuff do you guys usually get for the other kids in the family?

shadowcrane91 said:So I grabbed this little book called God in the Subway for this girl tomorrow...
It’s actually pretty funny and an interesting read 🙂
I’m definitely gonna have to go for another walk later to review everything since my memory is a bit fuzzy 😁
Anyway, Confirmation isn't until May

And just so you know, my congrats are gonna be totally personalized 🙂

That's awesome!

I've got that book at my place, and honestly, it's one of those gems you find yourself revisiting over and over again 😉

Thanks for the heads-up.
I'm also thinking about whipping up a cake, though I'll have to see if I'm feeling up to the task when the time comes 😳

shadowcrane91 said:- I just picked up some earrings for my daughter's First Communion tomorrow. I went with stainless steel since she loves wearing that stuff, and honestly, they look super fancy—like, totally high-end. I think they're perfect for her age, plus we'll be dropping some extra cash on the gift... + religious book
- For the next First Communion (a boy), we grabbed a baseball bat and a ball—that's what he really wants. We can't find a glove anywhere in all of Chicago, so he'll just have to go without one. I’m also planning to pick up a cool book (maybe a novel or a story) with some spiritual themes—not just strictly about God, because there are actually some really interesting and engaging ones out there
and more cash too
- For the third First Communion, I got a heart-shaped watch necklace (stainless steel again, and it's gorgeous) + cash... + religious book
And that's it... I'm officially broke this month...😁

That idea about using a gift card is actually pretty smart...

That being said, even if I'm trying to keep things simple, I always aim to include something spiritual, even if it's just a cool little book for ten bucks$6.75....(stores like Barnes & Noble have a great selection right now)
At the end of the day, it's a religious rite, and as such, we should show some respect with an appropriate gift... (or at least part of the gift should be)
I mean, it shouldn't all be purely material stuff; at least a portion of it should be something spiritual🙂....
Unless someone is sending a kid to these sacraments just for the sake of it...
And they don't know the first thing about faith... in which case, a gift like that wouldn't even mean much to them

I feel like I should jump on that too, so if anyone has any good ideas for children's books—maybe some titles or just general suggestions that actually fit what kids that age are into right now—please toss them my way, thanks for the inspo!🙏

shadowcrane91 said:I already sent Katty those messages for the congratulations 🙂
but I totally missed the window for this one tomorrow

Sending out those well-wishes feels like catching a perfect breeze on a summer afternoon—just smooth and easy. 🙏I actually asked her to write my name on it, just like those custom ones you see for baby showers.

silverskipper13 said:Honestly, this whole thing gives me the creeps. We have an older kid heading toward his First Communion next weekend, and some of the younger ones are getting baptized...

When people ask me what they should get them, I feel ridiculous suggesting things like a TV for their room or a BMX bike.

Babies definitely need diapers, though I wish people wouldn't show up with those tiny little packs that run out in two seconds.😲

Personally, I don't believe in overdoing it with gifts. Everything you receive, you eventually have to return in kind.😁...plus, with how expensive everything is lately, blowing cash like that just doesn't make sense.

I’d honestly just love for the people we invited to actually show up to the church service and the lunch we're putting together. I wish they wouldn't go overboard with the presents—maybe just toss fifty bucks in a card and call it a day. But I know that's impossible because heaven forbid the neighbors talk.

It's not like I care what anyone thinks about whether my gift is the biggest one in the room anyway.😲😁

For the baptism, you'll probably end up getting some cash anyway, and when people ask what the older kid needs, just tell them he's saving up for a new TV—I think that's a perfectly fine excuse. I actually asked this one mom if her daughter would be upset if she didn't get a big gift, and she told me straight up that she'd honestly prefer just getting some cash instead.
It feels kind of awkward to try and tell people what to buy when they don't even ask; they usually already have something in mind anyway.

frozenraven54 said:Is it actually okay to just take a gift card, like at a Turbo-limacher?

Honestly, I think that’s a great call.👍

I decided to just stick with cash so the kid can pick out exactly what they want, since my mom mentioned they've been saving up for some rollerblades.😉-😁

I also ordered this super cute custom card from Kate, just so it doesn't look like I totally phoned it in, because let's be real, I have zero clue what to buy.

Elizabeth Edwards10 said:thanks Brenda Barrett58 😉
but honestly, if you can actually see the cervix, things have gone totally off the rails.

Look, I wasn't trying to be dramatic or anything, I just brought it up to Ivana because everyone keeps telling her it’s impossible—otherwise, I wouldn't even say a word, but this is serious stuff. I actually had a lady tell me her own story about how her cervix was protruding so much she had to prop herself up on a couch. I really hope that’s not what’s going on with Ivana, but it definitely happens.

Sadly, I’ve heard of this happening before, so yeah, it’s definitely on the table😢😲 But just to be clear, we aren't talking about someone who just gave birth; it was an older lady, maybe around 70.

I really hope you aren't dealing with any of that🙂, I’m only bringing it up so you realize how serious this can get and that you should probably go get checked out.

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