Hannah Lewis2 said:Oh, honey! 🙂 Seriously, don't cry. Those pounds are just going to vanish like magic once you start moving around again, you'll see. I’m right there in the trenches with you on the scale, too. I’ve already put on 33 pounds, and I’m only in my 30th week—by the time I hit your milestone, I’ll probably be up another 10. If I can just level out at 50 total by delivery, I’ll consider myself a total winner. My husband was a little twitchy about it at first, but he’s chilled out now. And God forbid he tries comparing me to some super thin pregnant girl; he knows better than to go there. 😲 What your husband said? That's just plain mean. 👎
He acted like he was being sweet, like it was just some little joke!!! Well, after the fifth "joke," it isn't funny anymore! I guess I am genuinely worried about the weight gain. I have such a small frame, so every extra pound shows up immediately. I’ll consider myself lucky if I don't hit 175 pounds before I go into labor, 🙏🙏 because right now I’m sitting at 170.
Look, I’m fully aware of my weight. I know I’ve put on a significant amount—about 42 pounds so far—and I realize it’s probably going to be an uphill battle to lose it all, but honestly, I don't need it shoved in my face every single second. 😠 I was hanging out with my mom and aunt yesterday, and predictably, they started commenting on my weight. To make matters worse, I stupidly mentioned that my doctor expects the baby to be around 6.8 pounds by the end of the term (though I conveniently left out him mentioning that the baby seems a bit small 😢), and naturally, they launched into that whole tired lecture about how pregnant women who gain too much weight end up having smaller babies 😢.
It’s true that I’ve had my moments of weakness where I definitely overindulged in sweets and portions, but the issue is that I haven't been able to stay active to burn any of those calories off . And why not? Because from the very start of this pregnancy, I've been dealing with constant back pain and hip issues that have made moving around a struggle. It’s not like I’ve just been lying around, but I haven't been capable of going for long walks. I consider it a major win if I manage to mop the floors in this massive house, only to end up crying in bed at night because my spine is throbbing . Then, of course, there's my "wonderful" husband, who decides to call me fat under his breath, and then goes on to tell me how some other pregnant woman in the waiting room at the OB-GYN (who I didn't even see) looked so fit and slim, like she only had a little bump instead of me waddling around like a penguin. And he said all this right in front of my mother. How am I supposed to be okay with that?!
Honestly, screw them all! :2up: I know I've gained weight, and that is my business to deal with. The same goes for whether the baby turns out to be high-strung because apparently, I get "too stressed" during pregnancy. If the kid ends up being difficult, that's on me. :2up: It's my problem, not theirs. They aren't the ones raising this child, I am!
Honestly, I just don't get your mothers! 😕 Especially those moms who are over 27, have established careers, and have been living on their own for years, only to turn around and try to lecture you like you don't understand the first thing about life or responsibility.
I’m 22, and since I found out I was pregnant, my mom hasn't once questioned whether I actually grasp the weight of what comes with having a child. The reality is, sure, I'm young—but if my mother (who happens to be my harshest and most objective critic) can see that I am responsible and capable of taking care of my baby, I guess I just don't understand why your mothers can't see that in you. 🤷
Steven Barrett6 said:Look, all I know is once I have this kid, I am done with the constant chaos in my house. Period. I’ll just tell Michael Barrett11 to deal with the mess and call it a day. Done. I just want some damn peace and quiet. That’s it. I need my baby to have some calm for once, and honestly? I need to be able to actually catch a break and get away for a bit without everything falling apart. Simple as that. I just want to raise my kid my own way without all these people breathing down my neck or trying to take them away from me. Seriously, if they keep acting like this, I’m actually going to lose it. I’m just sitting here praying to God that my mother-in-law doesn't try to pull that "he should help out" nonsense with my oldest kid. Like, give me a break! As if I don't have enough on my plate already—now I'll be stuck babysitting him too? And oh yeah, sure, he’ll magically show up right during the holidays exactly when I'm in labor. Unbelievable. 😠 Look, if I don't make this crystal clear, Michael Barrett11 is gonna end up dropping me off at my folks' place. And honestly? Once he’s off the clock, I need him to come grab me. I just need to get out there and have some actual peace and quiet for once. My neighbor over there is my daughter-in-law, and she is a total lifesaver—basically a pro babysitter. I won't be lacking any help whatsoever once I'm settled in.
Look, I don't give a damn about what your grandma thinks. I know things are rough for you right now, especially if she’s out there "massaging" you like that—honestly, it sounds like a total nightmare for both you and Michael Barrett11. Your mom will definitely give her a heads-up, don't sweat it. She won't be tripping. Look, you and Michael Barrett11 are gonna have way more important things to deal with than this. You’ll be swamped with actual responsibilities and real problems. Seriously.
Look, they aren't dumping them on me. It's my mother-in-law doing all this. And she’s over here trying to play games, telling me the oldest kid needs to head straight to my place right after school lets out instead of doing anything else. She's always pushing this stuff on me. 😠 And even if they weren't sick, it wouldn't matter because these kids are constantly catching something, and honestly, it drives me absolutely insane. Like, what are they thinking coming over to my place when I'm pregnant? Where is the common sense?! I’m terrified I’m going to catch some nasty bug from them, and I am seriously losing my mind over it. One time I almost lost it—the oldest one (he's in second grade already, he should have at least an ounce of sense by now) was sick and hanging out at our place, eating with us, sitting right next to me, just coughing all over me. My skin was literally crawling. All I needed was for him to pass some bacteria onto me. Once this baby is born, I am not letting any of them anywhere near the room where the baby will be if they can't stop sniffing and wheezing.😠 And don't even get me started on their toys—if you can even call them toys, since half of them are broken anyway. Everything is covered in their paperwork, I can never find anything I need, and they leave a massive mess everywhere. I remember back when the two oldest used to come over—it was summer, my husband and mother-in-law were working, so I was home. I’d still be sleeping and they’d already be in the kitchen, drawing all over the table and making a disaster. I was absolutely livid, I walk in and they don't even say "good morning" or anything.😠 And there I was, acting like a fool, buying them breakfast and pastries. They made a total mess, but boy, did they know exactly when to clean up the table when the food was arriving. Their great-grandmother used to tease them about always hovering around me, and she’d actually lock the gate so they couldn't get to me. Honestly, she's clearly the only smart one in that whole group.
🙏🙏 regarding the great-grandmother 🙏
Well, it's just that one grandmother who gives me trouble. My own mom and my husband's mother (who we live with) are actually fine. That one lady told me I should call him immediately once I give birth, and I just told her, "Not a chance! I'll send him a text and that’s that." When we were planning the wedding, we only had two weeks to get ready. I called him a week before, and he actually had the nerve to tell me that someone like him shouldn't be invited to a wedding. And don't even get me started on when he found out I was pregnant. He started acting out, talking trash to my husband’s uncles and to my husband too, to the point where we didn't speak for months. And now, apparently, I'm supposed to make a special invitation just for him? Yeah, right.
When I mentioned the wedding situation to my husband's grandmother, she said I shouldn't even bother inviting him anymore. But then this other woman tells me I should still be catering to him, even though he's disrespectful to everyone. Dealing with a family like this... honestly, it's enough to drive anyone crazy. 🙂
Steven Barrett6 said:Look, all I know is once I have this kid, I am done with the constant chaos in my house. Period. I’ll just tell Michael Barrett11 to deal with the mess and call it a day. Done. I just want some damn peace and quiet. That’s it. I need my baby to have some calm for once, and honestly? I need to be able to actually catch a break and get away for a bit without everything falling apart. Simple as that. I just want to raise my kid my own way without all these people breathing down my neck or trying to take them away from me. Seriously, if they keep acting like this, I’m actually going to lose it. I’m just sitting here praying to God that my mother-in-law doesn't try to pull that "he should help out" nonsense with my oldest kid. Like, give me a break! As if I don't have enough on my plate already—now I'll be stuck babysitting him too? And oh yeah, sure, he’ll magically show up right during the holidays exactly when I'm in labor. Unbelievable. 😠 Look, if I don't make this crystal clear, Michael Barrett11 is gonna end up dropping me off at my folks' place. And honestly? Once he’s off the clock, I need him to come grab me. I just need to get out there and have some actual peace and quiet for once. My neighbor over there is my daughter-in-law, and she is a total lifesaver—basically a pro babysitter. I won't be lacking any help whatsoever once I'm settled in.
Look, I don't give a damn about what your grandma thinks. I know things are rough for you right now, especially if she’s out there "massaging" you like that—honestly, it sounds like a total nightmare for both you and Michael Barrett11. Your mom will definitely give her a heads-up, don't sweat it. She won't be tripping. Look, you and Michael Barrett11 are gonna have way more important things to deal with than this. You’ll be swamped with actual responsibilities and real problems. Seriously.
Look, they aren't dumping them on me. It's my mother-in-law doing all this. And she’s over here trying to play games, telling me the oldest kid needs to head straight to my place right after school lets out instead of doing anything else. She's always pushing this stuff on me. 😠 And even if they weren't sick, it wouldn't matter because these kids are constantly catching something, and honestly, it drives me absolutely insane. Like, what are they thinking coming over to my place when I'm pregnant? Where is the common sense?! I’m terrified I’m going to catch some nasty bug from them, and I am seriously losing my mind over it. One time I almost lost it—the oldest one (he's in second grade already, he should have at least an ounce of sense by now) was sick and hanging out at our place, eating with us, sitting right next to me, just coughing all over me. My skin was literally crawling. All I needed was for him to pass some bacteria onto me. Once this baby is born, I am not letting any of them anywhere near the room where the baby will be if they can't stop sniffing and wheezing.😠 And don't even get me started on their toys—if you can even call them toys, since half of them are broken anyway. Everything is covered in their paperwork, I can never find anything I need, and they leave a massive mess everywhere. I remember back when the two oldest used to come over—it was summer, my husband and mother-in-law were working, so I was home. I’d still be sleeping and they’d already be in the kitchen, drawing all over the table and making a disaster. I was absolutely livid, I walk in and they don't even say "good morning" or anything.😠 And there I was, acting like a fool, buying them breakfast and pastries. They made a total mess, but boy, did they know exactly when to clean up the table when the food was arriving. Their great-grandmother used to tease them about always hovering around me, and she’d actually lock the gate so they couldn't get to me. Honestly, she's clearly the only smart one in that whole group.
My mother definitely won't be the one to call her. Since they're divorced, she and my dad aren't on speaking terms, and she really can't stand her. She did mention she might give her a call once because he keeps bugging me about it, just to smooth things over a bit. 🤣 I don't talk to my father, and he doesn't communicate with anyone from his side of the family. The only way she’ll find out anything is if my husband calls her, or if I let her know after the birth. I'm not planning on calling her the second I head to the hospital; I don't need her blowing up my phone every five minutes asking, "Is the baby here yet?" 🙂
Maybe just tell your husband to firmly ask his mother to stop dropping the kid off at your place, especially right after the delivery. That would be a huge 🙂
So I’m trying to head out for a walk, right? And I’m low-key rushing because I don't want my nephew to spot me—he lives with us, and he was busy doing homework with her. Suddenly, she’s all like, "Oh, you want to take [Nephew] for a walk with you too?" Like, excuse me?! WTF?! Just leave me alone! I want to go by myself, throw my headphones on, and just power-walk in peace without having to deal with a kid the whole damn time. If I actually wanted to take him, I would have asked. Does she not get that I'm pregnant and just need some freaking solitude? And then I’m stuck having to make up these stupid, lame excuses just so I don't have to walk with him.
She used to piss me off like this all the time back in the day. She’d be like, "Hey, tell him to come over to our place after school so we can finish his homework together." Seriously? He isn't my kid! And let me tell you, that little guy knows exactly how to push my buttons. He never listens to a word I say. So, if I don't want to deal with the headache of him, fine—his own mom and dad can sit there and help him with his homework. It's not my fault they had four kids and now they can't find the time to keep up.
It's the same thing with them being over here constantly. She basically babysits them, and even my husband already told her that if she wants to watch them while they're at work, she should just go over to their house instead. When the parents are working, it's pure chaos here. All four of them are screaming their heads off by 4 PM, nobody listens, and then three of them wander off somewhere when the oldest one isn't around. But the second he walks through the door? Total mayhem and fighting. It sucks too, because they're here from early morning, so if I want to grab a kiwi for breakfast, I can't, because I don't have like five of them sitting in the fridge. It's just ridiculous when the parents are actually home and they still send all four kids over to our place. Like, hold on a second... Having kids is easy; actually raising them is the hard part. But the thing that gets me most is stuff like this: We’ll be having a quiet weekend at home—just me, my husband, and his mom—with the kids not around. Then Sunday night rolls around, someone comes over to visit us, and suddenly the kids show up looking like they just crawled out of a dumpster in torn clothes and dirt everywhere. Like, do their parents even care?! My husband is losing his mind over it.
Look, I love them. I really do. I'm always buying them stuff, baking cookies, making pancakes... but now that I'm pregnant, every single disobedient kid is just grating on my nerves. I don't mind them visiting, but there has to be some level of respect and order.
Also, I absolutely hate how my mother-in-law treats me like I'm some little child. I know she means well, I really do. For example, we were out for dinner on Saturday and she was freezing. She kept asking me, "Are you cold?" and I said, "No, I'm fine," but she asked me three or four more times! Then today she’s like, "You probably didn't even feel the cold because you were too cold yourself." Like, WTF? I'm 24, not five. I know how to take care of myself. If my own mom were here, she would have shut that down immediately, but I just felt too awkward to say anything.
I'd be losing my mind too. I mean, why have that many kids if you aren't going to look after them properly? I don't get why you're constantly being handed their responsibilities. Is it just so they can have peace and quiet so they can make another one, only to end up stuck taking care of that one too?
I just don't understand certain people!
As for my grandmother, honestly, talking to her a little bit is almost a relief because it gives my blood pressure a little spike. 🤣 She didn't find out about my pregnancy or my wedding from me. She actually told me that my husband better make sure to notify her the moment I'm admitted to the hospital so she doesn't find out about the birth from someone else. When I told my husband, he just rolled his eyes because he can't even wrap his head around her behavior. I totally feel for you. 😁
My wife gave me $500 as a wedding gift, and now she’s calling me to grill me about who I told regarding the money It’s not even that she minds me telling people, per se; she actually said, "Go ahead and tell everyone how much I gave you! Let them all know I was generous enough to give you a gift!" 🤦 First, she asked what I needed for the apartment, acting like she was going to buy it for me, so I mentioned a high-end comforter for our king-sized bed. Ever since she handed over the cash, she's been constantly checking in to see if I bought the blanket yet—apparently, I need to actually purchase it just so I have some sort of keepsake from her. 🤦 Then, she started asking if I have a baby swaddle sack—the kind you wrap a newborn in—and when I told her I did, she went, "Well, what are you going to use to wrap the baby when you're leaving the hospital? It'll be easier for you." 🙂 But my plan is to just use a regular blanket to swaddle the baby, because we have a bit of a drive from the hospital back home, 12 miles and I don't really feel like holding a baby in a specialized sack the entire time. Usually, my husband drives that route pretty fast, but I honestly don't think he'll dare to speed once we have our precious little passenger in the car. 😍
Adam Evans62 said:Stupid reasons. It’s actually embarrassing to even bring this up because half my family turned out to be total nationalists. 🙄
To them—not everyone, most people just stayed quiet with shocked looks on their faces—that’s a Canadian, basically a Muslim name. 👎So what? What's it to you? It feels like "certain people" would only be happy if my kid was named Joanna, Anna, or Mary. What can I even say? He’s from the South and I’m from the Midwest. Talk about a clash of cultures. 😛)
Look, I'm definitely not changing my name just because of their narrow-minded bullshit. The only way I’d even consider changing it is if MM actually grows some backbone and stands by me when things get real with the family. 😉 With my luck, they probably won't even like the name. Who knows whose name Frank actually is, anyway? I doubt it's even a typical American name. 🤷)
I actually think Una is an interesting and unique name. A colleague of mine gave her daughter that name about 12 or 13 years ago; she was very into Italian, and she chose Una because it carries the meaning of being "one" or "the only one."
But calling it a Middle Eastern or Islamic name🙂 just doesn't sit right with me.
But take a look at this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Una
Adam Evans62 said:It just ticked me off hearing that after my glucose test, I have to sit in a waiting room for two and a half hours before they draw blood again. 😲
They claim I have to stay still and can't even go home, but they clearly don't care that I'll be stuck there surrounded by a bunch of sick people with the flu and whatever else. They couldn't care less!!! 😠😠
I ended up going out for coffee with my mom, and we just sat there for those two hours waiting for the time to pass.☕ I mean, I only had water because they told me I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything—which was tough since I was starving.🙂
Can you imagine how much I hated sitting in that cramped, stuffy waiting room filled with people feeling under the weather?☕
Linda Ward312 said:Honestly, this past week has been a complete blur, and I’m just totally losing it—between my neighbors being a pain, my husband driving me up the wall, and just feeling like my own skin is too tight for me, I’m seriously at my breaking point! 😠 I’ve basically spent the whole day crying and just venting everything out, whether it’s because life is actually overwhelming right now or if it’s just my hormones doing a number on me. If it weren't for the Normabel I've been taking, I honestly don't know how I'd be holding it together. 😢 Now I’m starting to spiral a bit thinking about how all this stress might affect the baby. 😢Every time I go down an internet rabbit hole reading about how stress impacts a fetus, I end up totally horrified by what I read. 😢 What do you guys think about all this?
I suspect stress does affect the baby, but I suppose it isn't always easy to just switch off those feelings. Sometimes emotions—anger, sadness, anxiety—just take over completely.
Maybe try looking for some lighter threads to read.😉 Try checking out the non-pregnancy forums; I imagine that might lift your mood at least a little bit. And if nothing else, it might help to see that you aren't the only one letting your emotions run wild. 😁
My mom and my husband are driving me absolutely crazy right now! 😠
It feels like they’ve teamed up against me just because I insisted on buying a brand-new travel system for $750. We actually had an offer for some used ones just a few days ago, which might have worked since they were only a couple of years old and had only been used by one kid. So now I’m stuck trying to explain to my mom exactly why we ended up pulling the trigger on the expensive new set. The truth is, my husband finally took me to get them because he was feeling guilty. I’d basically been in a total fog, crying all day—I was just in such a bad headspace, and everything had just kind of piled up on me at once. I ended up snapping and laying it all out for him. I told him his priorities were completely skewed; apparently, a new roof for his hobby workshop matters more to him than his own child, even though that workshop could easily wait six months while the baby grows every single day and gets closer to being born.
In the end, I guess we finally agreed that I’m not entirely to blame for the new stroller purchase. It’s not like I did it for no reason, and honestly, if they had made that offer for the used ones a bit earlier, things might have been different—but I haven't been pregnant for very many days. Besides, I feel awkward calling up his side of the family to see who has gear they can lend us so we wouldn't have to buy anything new. I don't mind calling my own folks, but I really don't want to deal with his relatives.
Edward Rodriguez4 said:No way! I don't even feel like hanging out on Reddit lately, idk why!!! And it's not like I have to! I'll just stay right here and vent with you guys 😬 whenever I can actually steal a moment from my Eva! And quit whining about your height—if you ever end up at the doctor, you'll see what happens when you're built like a tiny little nugget 😂 just like a freaking bread box lid! 😂 🤣
I was actually getting my hopes up that I’d feel more like myself down there once the baby arrives 😂😂 but these abdominal pains are driving me crazy. It feels less like a dull ache and more like being poked with needles constantly. My doctor keeps insisting it's a good sign, apparently the uterus is just prepping itself for labor 🤷 . Anyway, I'm really not enjoying this part!!!
I swear, nothing even gets under my skin anymore 🙂
So, how are all my pregnant ladies doing? Any old timers or newbies in the mix today?
🙂 Same to you.
I bet you're just about ready to start a whole new thread on the parenting forums titled "What drives you crazy now that you're a parent?"
🤣🤣
Personally, my height is what gets to me—I'm just too short. 🙂 I suppose if I were taller, I’d probably have a bit more room in my midsection, and maybe my organs wouldn't feel so squished all the time. 🤣
get to know my boyfriend he can clearly see I'm struggling with the cleaning and that my stomach is killing me, but instead of actually offering to lend a hand he just tells me there's no rush and that I should just take my time :roleyes:
analogviper2 said:I’ve got a question for the group... I'm not trying to step on anyone's toes or call out any specific marriages here, I just want to hear some perspectives:
If you can't even get on the same page about the small stuff—like who’s handling the cooking, the laundry, or the grocery runs—how on earth do you and your partner actually tackle real problems or make decisions about the big, life-altering things?
Someone please weigh in...
I think this was our "argument" (though mostly I was just pitying myself because everything had piled up, and the breaking point was just some damn unstable shelf) they were truly trivial matters, I admit that, but once they accumulate, I find myself screaming at him about something that happened three years ago.
What made me even more miserable was that he didn't take me seriously; he couldn't see any reason for me to be sad or angry over a shelf, and that’s how the whole thing spiraled.
To be clear, I'm not usually like this. I've become much more sensitive lately, to the point where I could spend all day in bed crying, and I'm not typically a crybaby.
When it comes to the more important life decisions, we actually tend to reach agreements much faster and more effectively than we do regarding these little things.
It’s honestly exhausting, both physically and mentally, how much this is draining me.
I have three men in my life who are supposed to be my inner circle—the people who should matter most—but things are a mess. I don't even speak to one of them anymore, the second one tells me straight to my face that he hates me, and as for the third... I guess he just doesn't care at all.
Gary Evans8 said:Hey Taylor Swift, you’ve gotta realize our husbands can be such carefree idiots that it almost hurts, but honestly, it isn't worth stressing over. Just take it easy... he might finally feel bad about what he did today, but by tomorrow, he'll be right back to his old ways. That's just how they are, and we just have to live with it.
Michael Barrett11 asked me first thing this morning if I was going to do any ironing today, and I just told him there was no way I was touching that piece of junk ironing board.
It’s honestly pretty frustrating that I haven't been able to track down that specific preemie feeder I've been looking for. If I actually knew where to source one, I probably would have bought it by now, but my options seem limited since the only person I know who has one is my cousin out in Oregon, and even then, she just borrowed it from a colleague of hers.
He didn't even bother picking up any fruit, yet he managed to polish off every single orange in the house.
Hannah Lewis2 said:Look, Michael Barrett11, I’m sorry you feel that way, but honestly? Who cares about him. Buy yourself a damn chocolate bar and call it a day; he doesn't need a thing. As for the premature baby, just go out and get it—demand exactly what you want, this one and that one. How you manage to pull it off isn't my business.😳
I just don't have the energy to try and talk to him anymore. It feels like he doesn't even hear a word I say when I'm talking to him. The second he's done with work, his brain just checks out completely. He doesn't give a damn about anything I tell him; I guess he just thinks he deserves to shut his brain off and relax. Either that, or he just has no interest in actually talking to me.
Sean Long4 said:Taylor Swift 🙂 don't be sad...that's just how our guys are...
Honestly, I’m still getting worked up over those old ladies on the subway who practically hover right in my face while I’m sitting there. Like, could you maybe move? And then when I finally decide not to get up for them, they start muttering under their breath about me. I swear, I'm losing my patience with them..
Honestly, I’m just exhausted by the total lack of effort on his part.
It seems like building some ridiculous custom shed for his lawnmower is suddenly more important than anything else, while I'm apparently expected to just change the baby on the floor.