Posts by crimsongull20

Anonymous said:forgot to mention that, my bad...

NYC

Dr. Krause, Mayo Clinic (Sisters of Mercy, right).

Anonymous said:hey everyone

can anyone recommend a urologist who takes Medicare?

Which city?

If I were having trouble breathing, I'd head straight to a pulmonologist first.

bluemason3 said:Anyone have a gastroenterologist recommendation around California or the Gulf Coast? Not seeing much online. Couldn't find anyone in San Francisco, just three options near Seattle... without a referral, I’d probably just head to the Medica in Seattle. Not necessarily because of the doctors—since I don't know them—but because my mother was happy with their service 🤷

In Seattle, Dr. Ivan has a great reputation, though I haven't seen him myself. So, this isn't exactly firsthand experience...

Dana Miller2 said:Joining the thread...
Not really looking for advice.
My mom is fading away and there’s nothing left to do.😢
Just waiting for the end.
Not sure why I'm even here.
Maybe just some kind of encouragement...
Sending strength and patience to everyone else still fighting for a happy ending in New York.🙂

Death is inevitable.

Death is inevitable
at some point during the day
it's what people say all the time...
heard it from plenty of sources.

For heaven's sake, don't, darling,
pass away around five
in the morning, when you're angry
with me and the whole world.

Pass away around midnight
when an angel is descending.
Go peacefully, my little walkie-talkie,
while you're still being sweet.

I.S.

P.S. This poem is for your guy—hope you get that. 🙂
🙂

Brenda Collins4 said:a rheumatologist? doesn't feel right since I'm only 22. then again, who knows... maybe.

That "burning" sensation is nerve pain, or neuropathy. It can stem from diabetes or thyroid issues, but more likely, it's your spine.

If I were you, I'd ask for a referral to a neurologist and get an MRI of the entire spine. Since it's hitting both your arm and leg, it could be anything from your neck down to your lower back.

Catatonic beaver... (No content provided to rewrite.)
Look, the point isn't to just list movies or things we haven't seen yet... It's about remembering the ones that actually stuck with us last year. Usually, that means adding a quick note next to the title, even if it's just a single word. Thanks.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Woody Allen It's rare to see an actual critique of the American psyche in a US film. Really solid stuff... actually cheered me up.

Empty bottles..., Jan SverákIn the American translation, it's "Return of the mouth"...
Warm, human (as cliché as that sounds in a synopsis), and beautifully made. Good old-school American filmmaking...

nimblescout93 said:I would be seriously grateful if you guys could share your thoughts or give me some advice... PLEASE.

My last period was on November 12th, and usually, my cycle is pretty much clockwork. My boyfriend and I have slept together a few times without a condom, even though he never actually finished inside me. But for the last ten days, I’ve been spiraling into this massive panic about being pregnant, and now we’re both absolutely terrified and stressed out. I don't really have any major symptoms—my breasts aren't sensitive at all, I'm not peeing more than usual, and I get these slight waves of nausea, but honestly, I can't tell if that's actual pregnancy or just the result of me being a total nervous wreck and stressing myself out. Also, I feel a bit more "wet" down there than usual. My period should be coming any day now, but aside from sudden mood swings and being super irritable, I don't feel anything else... I've taken two tests so far and both were negative (though, full disclosure, I didn't use my first morning urine). What do you guys think?

I know this probably sounds stupid and irrational, but I am just so scared of everything. If anyone can help... what were your symptoms like in the very early stages? Did you feel different in any way, anything at all... Thanks so much!

It’s only December 31st, so you're basically panicking for no reason. But since you're already there—if I were you, I'd just head to the doctor right now and stop the guessing game.
Most women don't feel anything that early on, and they'll likely just list symptoms that haven't even happened yet, which is the last thing you need to hear right now.

amberfox4 said:I honestly suspect the core issue here isn't even that people are being intentionally or maliciously rude, though it certainly feels that way; rather, I think they genuinely believe that asking such questions is perfectly acceptable social behavior.
And if I were to push back—saying something along the lines of, "Well, excuse me, but I find that a bit intrusive, don't you think? Those are private matters..."—then the other person would simply offer some defensive retort like, "Oh, don't be so sensitive, I didn't mean anything by it, I don't see what the big deal is..."
And just like that, I end up looking like the aggressor, acting brusque or difficult, while the other party maintains this air of innocence, claiming they had no ill intent whatsoever.
Please, I am in desperate need of some actual advice on how to navigate this.

That response you suggested isn't rude at all; it's incredibly soft.

Even if their intentions are good, remember that the road to hell is paved with them. Why are you so afraid of coming across as blunt?

If you're worried about the confrontation, just pretend you didn't hear them. Turn your head, look away, and change the subject immediately.

amberfox4 said:Suppressing all that anger is definitely a recipe for health problems.
I wouldn't say I get truly furious over things like this—it's hardly worth my energy—but I do find myself feeling quite frustrated with my own reactions when I get defensive, mostly because I have this nagging desire to avoid being harsh.

Deep down, you actually want to 😁, you're just scared.

Give it a shot next time and let us know how it goes. 🙂

Bradley Smith...

Gerald Scott4 said:👍People tell me all the time that they're actually afraid of me...🤣🙂
and honestly, I take that as a huge compliment.🥳
Though, it is pretty hilarious to me that women who are barely 5'4" and 105 lbs are supposedly "scared" of me.😁

That used to be my height and weight for years. Now... better if I just stay quiet... 😢

feralcobra92 said:Well let me just lay out my perspective on this because honestly, that’s kind of the whole point of having an opinion, right? I don't see why you’d expect me to feel exactly like you or view everything through your lens, because my take—which totally doesn't have to align with yours—is pretty simple. You're more than welcome to disagree, but I truly believe it’s just plain silly to be blunt or brutally honest in those super trivial moments, like when some nosy neighbor asks you when you're planning on having kids. If you really think being harsh is the way to go, then hey, be my guest! Go tell your grandma to back off and tell her that since she never grills you about when she last hooked up with your grandpa, why she didn't have five kids instead of four, or why she goes to church every single day, or why her house is overflowing with crocheted coasters, for heaven's sake!

Where on earth did you get the idea that you and I are supposed to think and feel exactly the same way... 😕

I just think that, generally speaking, people are better off when others don't mess with their privacy. But if you don't mind... fine. Then you clearly don't have that issue...

Not that any neighbor, old lady, colleague, or even my own mother ever bothered asking... I guess they know me well enough to be intimidated...

feralcobra92 said:If she had just snapped back at him and been totally rude, she’d honestly feel even worse about the whole thing. I'm positive she would.

That's because you've been conditioned to think being "rude" is inherently wrong.
It isn't. It's actually much more dangerous to maintain this facade of politeness while letting resentment build up inside. That's not just bad advice; it's a health hazard in the long run.

It’s perfectly normal—and justified—to stop caring about people like that and let them know where they stand. At least then everyone knows exactly where they sit...

amberfox4 said:I find myself feeling poorly primarily because I am far too polite, and I simply haven't mastered the art of telling people that their business is none of their own and that their inquiries are quite uncouth.
It leaves me feeling frustrated with my own temperament, almost as if I've been foolish.
And this isn't limited to this specific subject; it happens whenever someone becomes overly inquisitive and oversteps a boundary, and I fail to react appropriately because I am terrified of appearing rude.

It's easier than you think. You just have to practice. It's rough the first few times you snap back, but eventually, you get used to it. Might even enjoy it...

But to actually do it, you have to stop caring what they think. Whether that neighbor thinks you're great or hates your guts, it doesn't change anything. It's true, but we were raised on those silly American myths about being nice to everyone and how everyone is inherently good... lies that take years to unlearn. In the meantime, you just waste time and energy you'll never get back.

Bradley Smith said:I’m actually pretty jealous 😢

Nobody ever bothers asking me when I’m going to have kids 🤷
ever

Why do people even talk about this stuff? When someone tries to grill me, I just give them this blank, dead-eyed stare and say nothing. And I mean nothing...
I told my neighbors straight up that I wasn't interested in the gossip—about them or me—and that those small-town clichés aren't my vibe. Since then, nobody has dared ask me again 🤷

And yet, here I am, counting down the days until I have a kid 😍
I’m really hoping 2009 turns out to be my year. It's wild to think back to when I was twenty; the mere thought of some little alien growing inside me and being sliced out with poultry shears used to make me gag 😢

So, honestly, I have no clue how this sudden urge for motherhood even kicked in. But it did, and I’m genuinely happy about it 🙂

Must mean you learned how to shut those nosy people down... 👍

Good luck with the baby. 🙂

amberfox4 said:😂
Do you truly believe she would even comprehend the subtext?

Doubtful. But you'd finally have some peace and quiet... which is worth a lot.

amberfox4 said:I certainly understand the sentiment.
Just the other day, my neighbor actually had the audacity to ask me, "And what about your husband? What does he think of all this?"
I mean, excuse me???
I find it perfectly reasonable to assume that being in total alignment on fundamental issues is a prerequisite for marriage. One would think it goes without saying that we decided to tie the knot because, beyond our mutual affection and shared values, we are deeply compatible and see eye-to-eye on the things that truly matter in life.
Honestly, how can anyone consider such a question anything other than incredibly intrusive and rude!?

She’s calling it rude because she’s too dim to know where public life ends and privacy begins. Honestly though, I'm pretty sure all she cares about is profanity... so if you hit her back with something like, "Hey neighbor, what color is your lady parts hair?" she'll probably just pass out from the sheer audacity and stop questioning you altogether.

amberfox4 said:No, none of us who don't have children think that having a dog is the same as having a child.
For instance, I personally see absolutely zero resemblance between owning a dog and raising a child, and I honestly don't know what anyone is trying to link together here; besides, I haven't compared the two in any of my posts, because in my view, there is no connection to be made.
I was merely commenting on a previous post where human beings and animals were being compared.
And yes, we must be prepared for questions and objections, but not because we chose not to have children, rather because we live among rude people who have no concept of privacy or knowing when to mind their own business.
It has nothing to do with whether or not you have kids. For example, my neighbor has a child and tells me she is constantly driven to madness by questions regarding breastfeeding and negative comments that border on outright accusations just because she stopped nursing early.
Honestly, where does it even occur to someone to ask such invasive personal questions and then proceed to lecture someone else on how to live their life?!
As for my age, I am much closer to 40 than 30.

There are plenty of people like that out there. Don't let them get under your skin... don't even take it personally. Most of the time, they aren't being malicious; they just lack the basic social intelligence to realize how rude and inappropriate they're being. It's not really their fault... Just quietly walk away from them.

feralcobra92 said:I mean, I’ll probably sound totally airheaded, but honestly, there are moments where I feel like I wouldn't even be disappointed if I ended up giving birth to a kitten instead of a human baby!

Seriously, this is just repulsive to me. I work directly with children with disabilities, so I know firsthand exactly what it means when you have a child who isn't what you expected. People struggle with that reality their entire lives, yet here you are, joking around with comments about how convenient it would be to just pop out a kitten or a panda! It’s absolutely gross. You're still young and just talking nonsense right now, but if you ever do have kids of your own, you are going to feel so much shame when you look back at the ridiculous things you said.

The statement was mine, so it’s only fair I respond.

The first issue is that you aren't reading a love for cats in that post, but rather a hatred for children. You're projecting meanings onto it that just aren't there.

I don't usually share personal details like age around here, but I'll make an exception: I have more than three bank accounts and I'm currently pregnant, dealing with all the anxieties that come with it, without any expectations. The kitten thing was basically my own way of trying to ease the fear of the scenario you mentioned—which has been haunting me since the start of my pregnancy—and trying to convince myself that I could handle any outcome.

You're misinterpreting both my words and my age, mostly because we're speaking different languages. My opinion of the human race is a little darker than yours, and my boundaries for sarcasm go a bit further... That's all.

feralcobra92 said:Where on earth in my posts does it say that I don't care about animals or that I believe in human sanctity ? I absolutely adore animals, which is exactly why my cats and my dog are constantly roaming around my apartment! I love kids too, so naturally, there are children running around my place all the time, and since I work directly with them, there are little ones buzzing around me at the office every single day.
Even though I'm an animal lover, I don't go walking around with these silly illusions about their "purity" or how "innocent" they are. I love people—for the most part, anyway—and I don't hold any delusions about their innocence or holiness either.
It’s certainly not my opinion that everyone is obligated to have children, and honestly, I’d even prefer if some people who currently have them hadn't, simply because of the way they treat them.
The thing that actually bothers me—and the reason I commented in the first place—is that angry, aggressive attitude toward children that just radiates from your posts, and frankly, the absolute worst part is when you compare kids to pets.
Society is constantly breathing down your necks, pressuring you to get married, have babies, and play the part of the perfect wife and mother, but seriously, so what?
If you don't want to do it, then don't listen to them and just move on! You're still young and you have plenty of time to change your mind later on if you ever feel like it.

Why does that bother you so much? Pets are basically their owners' children anyway...

I remember this colleague—she’s a big hiker out in the Rocky Mountains—telling me about how she ran into a mother bear and her cub once. Her son was just a baby back then, maybe a year old. She said the mama bear was beautiful, she wasn't scared at all, and her first thought was just: "I get it, you have a baby too."

Seems pretty logical to me. If someone can relate to an animal, I don't see why comparing offspring is such a big deal...