School closures/delays?

we aren't exactly overthinking this 😁
it’s going to follow the letter of the law, they’ll hit seven years old and that’s that

we aren't going to demand they start at six, because that would actually require some level of deliberation😁 since there isn't a mandatory requirement based on their birth date
whatever, if we stick strictly to age seven, it only applies to those born in September, which is fine by me

The people who have nothing but on their minds are those with babies just 3 or 4 months old. 😁
Everyone keeps questioning me about why my little one isn't in school yet. She’s not going because she’s simply not at that age yet—she's not even required to be enrolled. 🙂

My little girl is turning six at the end of February, which means she’s officially due to start kindergarten, but I’ve been seriously considering asking for a deferral.
She’s a bit on the smaller side physically, but honestly, her mental maturity is way ahead of her age. She already knows almost all her letters and can even read and write a bit; plus, without me even prompting her, she’s always stepping up to help out with little chores around the house. My son is currently in second grade, and watching him go through it, I can't help but feel like kids these days are just absolutely overwhelmed—they’re being bombarded with so much unnecessary information and heavy coursework from the very second they step foot into a classroom.😵
That’s really the heart of it for me; I just want to give her one more year to just be a kid, free from all that pressure. When I mentioned this to her preschool teachers, they were actually incredibly supportive of my decision.
I’d love to hear what you all think. Does anyone have experience with this, especially if your child started school a year later than their peers?

Donna Collins56 said:My little girl is turning six at the end of February, which means she’s officially due to start kindergarten, but I’ve been seriously considering asking for a deferral.
She’s a bit on the smaller side physically, but honestly, her mental maturity is way ahead of her age. She already knows almost all her letters and can even read and write a bit; plus, without me even prompting her, she’s always stepping up to help out with little chores around the house. My son is currently in second grade, and watching him go through it, I can't help but feel like kids these days are just absolutely overwhelmed—they’re being bombarded with so much unnecessary information and heavy coursework from the very second they step foot into a classroom.😵
That’s really the heart of it for me; I just want to give her one more year to just be a kid, free from all that pressure. When I mentioned this to her preschool teachers, they were actually incredibly supportive of my decision.
I’d love to hear what you all think. Does anyone have experience with this, especially if your child started school a year later than their peers?

What does any of that have to do with anything? They're going to hit all those milestones eventually anyway. What’s the big deal if it happens now or next year?

If a kid is emotionally and intellectually ready, what's the actual logic behind pushing things back?

Donna Collins56 said:My little girl is turning six at the end of February, which means she’s officially due to start kindergarten, but I’ve been seriously considering asking for a deferral.
She’s a bit on the smaller side physically, but honestly, her mental maturity is way ahead of her age. She already knows almost all her letters and can even read and write a bit; plus, without me even prompting her, she’s always stepping up to help out with little chores around the house. My son is currently in second grade, and watching him go through it, I can't help but feel like kids these days are just absolutely overwhelmed—they’re being bombarded with so much unnecessary information and heavy coursework from the very second they step foot into a classroom.😵
That’s really the heart of it for me; I just want to give her one more year to just be a kid, free from all that pressure. When I mentioned this to her preschool teachers, they were actually incredibly supportive of my decision.
I’d love to hear what you all think. Does anyone have experience with this, especially if your child started school a year later than their peers?

I honestly don't think what you described is a valid reason to delay starting school. You have a healthy child who seems ready both in terms of age and maturity, so I'm not sure what there is to delay. In my experience, there's a higher chance you might face some unintended side effects rather than actually securing that extra year of carefree childhood. I know things are different now compared to how it was twenty years ago when we were growing up, but please, it isn't like you're sending a kid into a literal circle of hell; you're putting them in a desk where they learn and hang out with friends. Whether they feel pressured or not usually depends much more on the child's own personality and how they were raised at home rather than the actual school curriculum itself.

dustymaker642 said:I honestly don't think what you described is a valid reason to delay starting school. You have a healthy child who seems ready both in terms of age and maturity, so I'm not sure what there is to delay. In my experience, there's a higher chance you might face some unintended side effects rather than actually securing that extra year of carefree childhood. I know things are different now compared to how it was twenty years ago when we were growing up, but please, it isn't like you're sending a kid into a literal circle of hell; you're putting them in a desk where they learn and hang out with friends. Whether they feel pressured or not usually depends much more on the child's own personality and how they were raised at home rather than the actual school curriculum itself.

I’m with you on this one.

Emotional maturity matters infinitely more than whether a child hits a certain height or weight requirement. But there's a catch: your own attitude toward school and its responsibilities plays a massive role. Kids are sponges; before they even develop a sense of self, they just mirror their parents' outlook.
If you act like school is this huge burden that's stealing their childhood—if you sit there "suffering" through the transition in front of them—then you're essentially guaranteeing they'll struggle to adapt to the very responsibilities they are already capable of handling.

My little girl was born in mid-April, and she started kindergarten when she was nearly seven and a half. We could have pushed her to start at six and a half, but we didn't want to force it since she wasn't legally required to be in school yet. Looking back, if she had started earlier, it would have been much harder for her than it is now. Why? Because she simply wasn't emotionally ready. Physically, though, she was already at a third-grader level (and she’s taller than most kids her age now).
Spending that extra year in preschool allowed her to mature emotionally. To be honest, despite how hard the teachers worked with them, she eventually just got bored. She couldn't wait to finally get into a real classroom.

I honestly don't get this obsession with academic pressure and constant testing, especially when it's pushed onto kids who are already more than ready. If I recall correctly—though my memory isn't perfect—back in elementary school, I had plenty of downtime outside of class for playing, reading, and just being a kid. To be blunt, my extracurriculars actually took up way more of my life than actual schoolwork; I spent significantly more hours practicing my instrument than I did grinding through homework. And it wasn't just me, either. Most of us spent our afternoons hanging out with friends, walking around, or listening to music—just typical kid stuff. It feels surreal that the school system has shifted so drastically over the years. I mean, what exactly are we trying to achieve here?

I also completely agree with the point about how much a parent's perspective shapes a child's attitude. In the US, things work quite differently regarding enrollment and organization, but there’s still this general sense that starting school is a major milestone that the whole family celebrates—it's supposed to be a place for five-year-olds to enjoy themselves. They should feel happy there. We actually had to pull my daughter out after four months because I was on a sabbatical in a country where kids start school much later (plus, the language barrier was a real issue). She’s in an international preschool now, which is fantastic, but she truly misses her old school.

It’s best to judge a company by its actions; if they aren't actually showing any real interest in doing anything about it, then let them try—otherwise, I find this whole push for early specialization just as senseless as anyone else. A carefree childhood is priceless, and those adult responsibilities never just magically resolve themselves 🙂

My son was born in late January, which puts him right at the cutoff for school enrollment. To be blunt, he has zero interest in academics and is emotionally underdeveloped for his age. His preschool teachers assign these worksheets, and while I sit down with him at home and we actually get them done quite well, he finds the whole process utterly tedious. He refuses to engage. He knows his letters, but he has absolutely no desire to learn how to write them or master reading. It’s exhausting. He can barely give me a coherent description of what they did at preschool; everything is superficial and vague. 🤦I am genuinely concerned about how he will manage actual homework assignments when he's this checked out. And God forbid he gets tired—then all hell breaks loose. He is far too hyperactive and distracted. Is it possible to request a deferral based on developmental maturity? Is it already too late to delay his start if he's currently seven years and seven months old?

They’re the ones calling the shots on the delays, but honestly, I don't think it's such a disaster. We used to go through with everything at the 6 and 7-month marks. To be truthful, I can't even recall the specifics of what was on the tests or the assignments, but they always manage to pass with a B. They pull off top grades with hardly any effort, though I see absolutely no point in pushing them too hard. The downside is that I find myself having to step in just to secure an A, which isn't always feasible, and it definitely doesn't foster any sense of independent study—I end up jumping in whenever I feel it's necessary. Often, these kids who act out just need a different tactic; if you use play or oral questioning, everything runs smoothly enough.

Quote:>

JetBlue says: My little guy was born late January, so he's technically due to start kindergarten this fall, but honestly, school just isn't his vibe right now—he’s acting way younger than his age. We go over his preschool worksheets at home and he actually does a great job, but he just can't be bothered, you know? Like, he knows his letters, but the idea of actually learning to write them or read is just such a drag for him... goodness, it's exhausting! He can barely tell me what they did at daycare without being super vague, so I'm sitting here wondering 🤦 how on earth he's going to tackle actual homework once things get tough. Plus, when he's tired, oh man... it's a whole thing. He's just so playful and distracted, and I'm feeling totally lost on what to do next. Is it even possible to request a redshirt year? I really feel like he isn't ready yet, and is it actually too late to hold him back if he's already 7 years and 7 months old?

Personally, I don't think we should be obsessing over the exact number of years or months a kid has been on this planet...
It’s kind of like how some five-year-olds act like little adults while some eight-year-olds are still running around like toddlers.

The real kicker is that even though the preschool teachers and specialists give their input, the final call on whether a kid gets to start school early or needs an extra year is made by someone in a district office who hasn't even met the child.
And it's just as brutal that you don't even hear the decision until mid-July. What are you supposed to tell your kid then? Are they going or staying home? Why? It's a mess. 👎

Based on what some other parents in our local preschool group have been saying, getting a deferral this year has been an uphill battle, almost impossible, even when everyone turned in all the paperwork and professional evaluations recommending the delay.

Brian Barnes5 said:Quote:>

JetBlue says: My little guy was born late January, so he's technically due to start kindergarten this fall, but honestly, school just isn't his vibe right now—he’s acting way younger than his age. We go over his preschool worksheets at home and he actually does a great job, but he just can't be bothered, you know? Like, he knows his letters, but the idea of actually learning to write them or read is just such a drag for him... goodness, it's exhausting! He can barely tell me what they did at daycare without being super vague, so I'm sitting here wondering 🤦 how on earth he's going to tackle actual homework once things get tough. Plus, when he's tired, oh man... it's a whole thing. He's just so playful and distracted, and I'm feeling totally lost on what to do next. Is it even possible to request a redshirt year? I really feel like he isn't ready yet, and is it actually too late to hold him back if he's already 7 years and 7 months old?

Personally, I don't think we should be obsessing over the exact number of years or months a kid has been on this planet...
It’s kind of like how some five-year-olds act like little adults while some eight-year-olds are still running around like toddlers.

The real kicker is that even though the preschool teachers and specialists give their input, the final call on whether a kid gets to start school early or needs an extra year is made by someone in a district office who hasn't even met the child.
And it's just as brutal that you don't even hear the decision until mid-July. What are you supposed to tell your kid then? Are they going or staying home? Why? It's a mess. 👎

Based on what some other parents in our local preschool group have been saying, getting a deferral this year has been an uphill battle, almost impossible, even when everyone turned in all the paperwork and professional evaluations recommending the delay.

And honestly, even those recommendations from the preschool staff aren't always the most rock-solid metric you can rely on.
The teachers tend to follow along based on how much energy they have that day, and then you've got the psychologist or pedagogue who basically only shows up when summoned—meaning they see the kid for maybe an hour and suddenly think they've reached some ultimate, infallible professional verdict.

I really feel like at the end of the day, every parent just needs to trust their gut, make the call for their own kid, and be done with it.

Karen Richardson3 said:And honestly, even those recommendations from the preschool staff aren't always the most rock-solid metric you can rely on.
The teachers tend to follow along based on how much energy they have that day, and then you've got the psychologist or pedagogue who basically only shows up when summoned—meaning they see the kid for maybe an hour and suddenly think they've reached some ultimate, infallible professional verdict.

I really feel like at the end of the day, every parent just needs to trust their gut, make the call for their own kid, and be done with it.

But hold on, if we're saying every single parent gets the final say without any guidance... 😵 well, you know how some parents can be.

Things work totally differently at my kid's daycare here in the States. The school psychologist is actually part of the daily routine, so they truly know every single child by name and face. They're constantly encouraging us to set up one-on-one sit-downs with the teachers and the specialists for pretty much any little concern we have, and honestly, people actually take advantage of that.
I trust them with everything, and the teachers do too.

I honestly believe school readiness should be left entirely to the experts, not parents. Some folks will think their kid is way ahead of where they actually are, while others get overly protective and end up keeping them home until they're eight for no real reason.

I have no clue what the curriculum looks like these days. I remember my elementary years being ridiculously easy. My parents never had to help me with homework because there was just nothing to do. I barely learned anything. I cruised through with straight A's, except for a B in PE. I started school at six and a half, and back then, I couldn't even read or write yet.

My brother started at six and five months, and school was such a breeze for him he barely even realized he was attending class.

And we were going to a school that was famous for being the toughest one in our town.

I don't know why things have changed so much... Even the kids who ended up needing summer school in later grades didn't find first grade that overwhelming. Sure, they weren't all honor roll students, but they still finished those early years with solid B's or C's.

I don't see school as some big scary monster. My daughter was born in February. Assuming everything goes smoothly, she’ll start when she's six and seven months. Anything else would just be unnecessarily late for her, provided she's healthy.

Brian Barnes5 said:But hold on, if we're saying every single parent gets the final say without any guidance... 😵 well, you know how some parents can be.

Things work totally differently at my kid's daycare here in the States. The school psychologist is actually part of the daily routine, so they truly know every single child by name and face. They're constantly encouraging us to set up one-on-one sit-downs with the teachers and the specialists for pretty much any little concern we have, and honestly, people actually take advantage of that.
I trust them with everything, and the teachers do too.

I honestly don't even know if our daycare even employs a psychologist🤷
and I already posted about my issues regarding individualized attention in that other thread about childcare centers.

My neighbor was actually seeking out a psychologist's opinion because she was second-guessing whether her little guy was ready for kindergarten. She just had this gut feeling he wasn't quite there yet—since his birthday is right at the end of March—so she went looking for a pro.
The kid spent maybe an hour with this specialist, just listening to him and doing whatever he suggested, and then the psychologist basically gave a thumbs up saying the boy is perfectly ready for school.
I genuinely can't wrap my head around how anyone is supposed to reach a meaningful conclusion after spending a measly hour with a child.
It made me think of Frupy and how much she dislikes those school specialist teams. 😁

Looking at my friends' kids, it’s pretty clear that first graders are dealing with an incredibly demanding curriculum these days. It seems especially tough for those in full-day programs, because if they aren't finishing their assignments at school, they end up coming home around 4:30 or 5:00 PM and having to tackle all that homework right after a quick break.

If they didn't include the essay prompt in the study guide, I’d definitely make a bigger deal out of it just to ensure they start including them for the second graders too.

Rebecca Clark6 said:Looking at my friends' kids, it’s pretty clear that first graders are dealing with an incredibly demanding curriculum these days. It seems especially tough for those in full-day programs, because if they aren't finishing their assignments at school, they end up coming home around 4:30 or 5:00 PM and having to tackle all that homework right after a quick break.

It makes you wonder, though—what exactly are they doing during all those extra hours there?

Gary Nguyen45 said:It makes you wonder, though—what exactly are they doing during all those extra hours there?

Most kids are just busy with their homework, though some aren't, and I know for a fact they were just hanging out in the backyard or something similar...

Rebecca Clark6 said:Most kids are just busy with their homework, though some aren't, and I know for a fact they were just hanging out in the backyard or something similar...

I’m with you there. I honestly don't get how someone can sit in an after-school program and not have any schoolwork to tackle. It makes zero sense. What are they even doing? You can't just be out running around from noon until five in the afternoon. But hey, that’s a whole different rabbit hole, isn't it?

I suppose parents are entitled to their own take on whether a child should be held back a grade, but we really ought to let the professionals handle the heavy lifting. Let them assess and decide. Let's face it: as parents, our judgment gets clouded the second it involves our own kid. We aren't exactly objective. Besides, it's not just one specialist making the call; it’s a coordinated effort involving doctors, school psychologists, and teachers working as a team.