Posts by casualotter21

rapidstag74 said:It isn't really about the coat itself; it’s about what's inside it. In this instance, it's Kate.

I heard she’s actually naked under all those layers! hahahahahahahaha

amberfalcon172 said:Honestly, I’m getting a little nauseous looking at the whole black leather and trench coat aesthetic. Is there anyone else left who actually thinks that looks stylish? It feels so... last century.🙂

Personally, I find the real special effect to be how that crowd manages to walk around without tripping over everything or knocking over furniture and vases while wearing those bulky coats.😁

rapidstag74 said:Like, Kate Beckinsale in Underworld. HOT.
I find myself completely preoccupied by that film today, despite having yet to actually watch it.

YESSSSSSSS!!!! Dammit! I even started talking to Icepick about it yesterday before we pivoted to discussing The Avengers!

For those not in the loop: "The Underworld" is the latest action-packed mess from Sony. It takes place in some mysterious gothic megalopolis where a secret war rages between vampires—who live like decadent members of the social elite (though nobody actually knows they exist)—and werewolves who look like some kind of street gang. Kate Beckinsale plays an elite vampire assassin who falls for the wrong guy.
The movie is a total rip-off of Vampire: The Masquerade and other White Wolf games set in the World of Darkness. Apparently, White Wolf even sued Sony over it. But honestly, that’s irrelevant! What matters is seeing Kate Beckinsale leaping from the fifth floor dressed in tight black leather and a long black trench coat! And her fighting off two gunmen! And lifting a guy off his feet by his throat with one hand! It’s just mindless action with plenty of style and absolutely no substance whatsoever!
go Kate! Who would have thought she was the same woman from "shoot a Fish" or whatever that British comedian's name was.

Ahhh, Hollywood, Hollywood! Since September 11th, you've had me retreating into escapism three times more often than before. Keep up the good work!

I watched the movie and honestly, I thought it was great. Anyway, I’m in a pretty lucky spot: I know just enough about the comics and the original books to follow the plot, but since I haven't actually *read* the graphic novels, I didn't fall into that annoying trap of thinking, "Ugh, this was so much better in the books."

As for other mistakes, my tolerance is pretty high because the mere concept of a bunch of literary characters acting as superheroes in a steampunk version of Victorian United Kingdom is just too good to pass up.

As it is, the film works for me, and I’ll probably be obsessing over Fifth Wilson for a while until some other high-dexterity cinematic fighting masterpiece comes along. (Specifically, I'm talking about watching "X-Men 2" on DVD).

rapidstag74 said:Even though I’ve become an absolute legend in this genre (just check out Le Big Nef on IMDb.com(Pornhub) 😉), my hard work still seems to go largely unappreciated.
Perhaps if I were just some blonde with silicone implants...

rapidstag74, really... First you're on Television rambling about wanting to dress up in a vampire skirt, and now you're over here on Cinema claiming you want silicone breasts. Do you actually have any meaningful insights you'd like to share with us?

rapidstag74 said:Based on my time working in the adult industry, I can tell you that these movies aren't recorded with live audio. Once we wrap up filming, my partners and I head back to the studio to redo the scenes, making sure our breathing perfectly matches the facial expressions captured on camera. It’s grueling work. We often have to retake the same sequence five times just to get it right.

Good grief. My heart breaks for them. That sounds like an absolutely brutal way to make a living.

Harold King54 said:It all started when I watched Crimson River, but in French. It hit me that I’d actually seen it in English before, and then I realized they had basically filmed two different movies...
one version in French and one in English...

When I mentioned this to a friend, he just called me an idiot and explained that when a movie is being shot, actors just move their mouths aimlessly while the actual audio is recorded later in a studio!

You should tell your friend that movies aren't even actually filmed: what you see on the Cinema screen are giants living inside the theater, trapped behind glass like fish in an aquarium. As for what you see on TV, those are just little gnomes who are incredibly fast at disguising themselves and possess some truly impressive stage machinery.

Have you realized that with those movies—specifically the ones by J.J. Abrams—you actually have to sit through the credits? There is always some sort of joke hidden there. For instance:

Production Assistant
Best Boy
Best Man
Best Boy - Man
Best Production Assistant
Best Men Assistant of Production
Best Boy - Man Production Assistant

Or take yesterday, right before the end of the credits, where they list "Deleted Scenes" (it's nice they remembered those people too), and it includes things like "Background Extra"

"Could the owner of the blue Honda Civic with license plate ABC 1234 please report to the lobby because their lights are left on."

Or perhaps:

"No animals were harmed during the making of this movie."

"However, several species went extinct during post-production."

Followed immediately by a list of species and their causes of death... such as "excessive photography" or "snack breaks."

Anđeo said:Before the weight gain!🙂

Whew! Imagine turning on the TV only to be greeted by some frantic news anchor sounding an alarm about a massive sewage leak, followed by a screen full of sludge. It would certainly be in the spirit of Golden Gun, though perhaps a bit too much for my tastes.

Anđeo said:🙂 Ana Nicole Smith also stars in the third installment 🙂 🙂

Was that before or after her Marlon Brando phase?

granitesailor98 said:Blade II is actually a decent flick. Honestly, it’s way too Hollywood, but it works as a fun action movie. If anyone goes looking for deep philosophical themes, they're going to be disappointed because that isn't what this movie is for. It exists to entertain.

Aside from that, based on the trailer, the movie looks alright.
Mind you, trailers are notoriously deceptive. Based on the footage alone, one might have thought The Matrix Reloaded was a masterpiece, only to find out it was total garbage.

Cheers to all the Matrix fans out there 🙂

Why bring up The Matrix Reloaded now? I just finished dinner, people!

grandpa the du du monkey said:Morecomics

He has 7 of his comic strips. Along with The Avengers, I’d definitely suggest checking out Watchmen and V for Vendetta. The prices are actually quite reasonable.

you could also take a look over here

One hundred and twenty bucks for the first issue of LoEG? I'm not so sure about that... For eighty bucks, I could probably just pick up a book at Algorithm... though it might be worth making the trip to Morecomics. If I manage to survive another year of college, I might actually get around to it.

rapidstag74 said:I don't think she was even in the comic, but this is Hollywood—what kind of movie would it be without some hot vampire walking around in broad daylight? It’s going to be a disaster...

I beg to differ, sir! Based on what I managed to glean from an article in Wired and a few dead links floating around the web, she actually *is* an essential part of the story. It's just that, unlike the movie version, she isn't some action-hero vampire in the original; she's just a regular woman. Honestly, that's one change from the source material that doesn't bother me at all. 😁

On the other hand, they turned Griffin into some random invisible man, tossed in Dorian Gray (which I can live with), and then added Tom Sawyer (WTF?!!).

Adam Wright56 said:I’m going to ask a rather foolish question since I can't be bothered to dig through Google myself.

Does this have anything to do with that British series "Saturday Night Live"?

YOK. The movie is (somewhat, unfortunately) an adaptation of an Alan Moore comic strip. Conceptually, it's similar to X-Men but with a delightfully Victorian steampunk twist: the story takes place in an alternate 19th century where a massive cellular bridge connects the United Kingdom and France over the English Channel, zeppelins are as common as cars are to us, Martians from H. G. Wells's war planet are planning an invasion of Earth, while Cavor concocts cavorite in his lab, and characters like Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Fu Manchu, Dracula, and various other figures from Victorian literature actually exist...

As for the main members of the "X-Men" team, they are:

Captain Nemo—do I really need to explain who that is?

Mr. Hyde—same here.

Hawley Griffin—the invisible man and mad scientist from the novel of the same name by Herbert Georg Wells Alan Quartermain.

Alan Quartermain—the hero of Haggard's "King Solomon's Mine"; essentially the American Indiana Jones from an era when Harrison Ford's grandfather was still just a twinkle in a milkman's eye.

Mina Murray—one of the central heroines in Stoker's Dracula (Mina Harker).

The idea of me being interested is strong, even if I haven't managed to track down and read the comic strips yet. I have a soft spot for steampunk; I devoured Wells, Doyle, and Vernea as a kid, and neither Haggard nor Stoker are strangers to me. I'll go see the film, if only because I enjoy steampunk and alternative history, and I'm fairly tolerant of trash as long as it's fun and has style. Still, I should probably try to get my hands on those comics.

http://members.tripod.com/~sonofthelizardking/cheat.jpg

casualotter21 said:Which movies left you completely unimpressed—not even in a bad way? I mean, they were so soulless that you just forgot you ever watched them. I wouldn't even call them boring, because being boring at least leaves an impression. But if you forget them instantly, leaving you totally cold...

Right now, all I can conjure up are "Tiger and Dragon" or "Doomsday"... I'll probably add to the list as they occur to me later.

<smartass mode> Heh, I'm not sure how I could possibly list movies so bad that I've forgotten them, if by definition forgetting them means they failed that hard, right?</smartass mode>

But let me try:
-Inception
-The Tannenbaums
-The Matrix Reloaded (okay, I didn't exactly forget this one, but the truth is I'm having more and more trouble remembering what on earth actually happened in it)

I've forgotten most other films like that.

There is one truly terrible individual: Mickey Rourke, also known as Mastercard.

Oh, please! Don't even get me started on Chuck Norris. Just because of Walker Texas Ranger, you could probably coat him in breadcrumbs and batter and turn him into some sort of fried meat dish!

rapidstag74 said:Maybe this is just a teaser for a third installment (why is everyone staring at me like that? Obviously, there will be a sequel), where the Charlie's Angels fight a villainess wielding a golden strap-on.

I've got to go...

I just started watching... Jesus, I can't even bring myself to type that out, Ally..... ghnnnnnnnnnhggggggggg..... Mc..... groaaaaarghhhhhh Mc....................uuuuuuuuuuuuuh.... BEAL.

Well, damn it. Now I have to clean my fingers and the keyboard with some bleach.

During this past summer, I attempted to work my way through the Takeshi film cycle, though I only managed to catch two: "Hana-bi" and that bizarre comedy where Takeshi—it seems—parodies those classic tropes like period martial arts, Yakuza crime flicks, and, naturally, giant monster movies.

While "Hana-bi" was a decent enough crime drama, this second film felt incredibly stilted. Honestly, much like watching a bad SNL sketch, so many of the jokes were so nonsensical that I ended up laughing at how poorly constructed they were. Still, it was funny in its own way. A friend of mine actually filmed it; I’m not sure if he ever saved the footage on a tape, but it’s certainly strange enough to be worth preserving.

rapidstag74 said:The movie would be even better if it included some Hot Lesbian Action.

BINGO! Spot on! I’d hand you a twenty right now if I could.😁

There is that one scene where Demi Moore is all over Cameron Diaz. It isn't much, but it's a start!

Man, this movie is such a joke! It feels like if I were hanging out with my buddies over a weekend, after three or four hours of drinking and messing around, I’d just say, "Hey guys, what if we made a movie?" And then for the next two hours, we’d just keep piling on increasingly ridiculous ideas: there have to be hot women, tons of explosions, who cares about the plot? By the end of all that rambling, you'd just have absolute chaos.
"AND THEN THERE ARE MOTORCYCLES AND... AND... EXPLOSIONS... AND... ASSASSINS... BUT THERE HAVE TO BE HAWWT WOMEN... BUT, WAIT, HE'S ACTUALLY THE SAME TYPE OF GUY THEY FOUGHT BEFORE... BUT THEY HAVE TO SHOOT GUNS... AND RIDE MOTORCYCLES... BUT, BUT, BUT, THEN IT HAS TO GO SLOW MOTION LIKE IN Matrix... AND THEN THE MOTORCYCLE CRASHES... BUT I DO A BACKFLIP.... AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER EXPLOSION.. AND, AND, AND, AND Matrix... AND BOOM AND POW AND... AND... ASSASSINS... AND MORE MOTORCYCLES... AND THEN IT'LL BE THIS COMBINATION OF Matrix-BACKFLIP-MOTORCYCLE-ASSASSIN ACTION!!

<collapses onto the floor during an epileptic seizure>

No, honestly, I think the movie is a blast. It's definitely something I'll want to watch again.