Posts by Donna White50

Sean Kern2 said:And the best mistakes.

I didn't judge him. Intuitively—maybe even subconsciously—I avoided him, not because I lack empathy or tolerance, which is a ridiculous thing to suggest, but simply because I-didn't-know-how-to-act-around-him. I used the example of how emotional stiffness leads to potential issues, and that is a fact, no matter how much you try to twist my words.

Emotional stiffness isn't depression (though it can lead to it in certain cases), so please, stop conflating the two.

Furthermore, when we're discussing extreme cases of abuse and harassment, it's obvious that these cause excessive behaviors and psychological issues that people carry with them throughout their lives, and the movie presents these extreme cases specifically to draw a conclusion about the bigger picture.

The movie provided current statistics on violence, which is reaching epidemic proportions in the USA and across the rest of the world. The masks—the way people learn to act because they think or are told that's how they should act—might not be the only reason, but they're definitely a significant factor.

To explain, boys grow up, and playing, testing strength, power, and success is a core part of growing up—it's a biological drive for individual success (reproduction). While boys are driving toy cars, playing war, and measuring their strength, women are leaning into tenderness, attractiveness, and maternal roles. End of story. It's always been this way and it's normal behavior. No psychiatrist (and I don't have a high opinion of psychiatry anyway) has any right to peddle their own baseless opinions claiming this needs to change, or worse, that this behavioral model is negative and should be suppressed. They can only offer opinions on excessive behaviors that aren't socially acceptable, because that's what they deal with—that's their job.

Here we go again with the whole "masculinity is just a social construct" thing when it’s clearly rooted in biology. And honestly, where are the girls when it comes to measuring power, competing, and wanting to win? That’s just human nature, not some exclusive male trait. It’s about how we channel that drive without needing to lash out at anyone perceived as "different" or "weaker." But let's be real—so-called men do exactly that constantly, from playground bullies to disrespecting women, all the way up to nations flexing their nukes to intimidate each other. If it wasn't so pathetic, it would actually be hilarious. You can think whatever you want about psychiatrists and psychologists, but they’re the experts on the human mind, and their take on interpersonal dynamics isn't changing just because you don't like it.

Quincy:

My black-and-white view makes sense given how extreme behaviors are constantly presented here as if they're the standard for everyone, which they aren't. Since we're already talking about extremes, why shouldn't I use an extreme framework for this conversation? Bottom line: we all wear masks. Masks are a fundamental part of life used to protect our privacy and keep us from being too vulnerable. Suppressing emotions has always been a survival mechanism in society, and thinking that being wide open in this dangerous world will actually lead to anything productive is just a total illusion.

Look, being an authentic person means being willing to be vulnerable. Vulnerability isn't weakness; it's what makes us human (and sorry if I’m repeating myself, but you’re the one doing it).

In one of your later posts, you laid out certain human needs. So, how exactly is someone wearing a mask supposed to achieve self-actualization? Do you really think people like Mahatma Gandhi, Aung San Suu Kyi, Mother Teresa, or Nelson Mandela were weak?

Quincy:

Everyone needs to find their own way to express emotions in a socially acceptable manner, and there are plenty of ways to learn. Sure, documentaries about world peace and love are easy watching and people love them, but the reality is that those things have zero basis in practice. The bitter truth we all live in is that it's impossible to satisfy everyone's individual desires and needs, and there's nothing we can do to change that.

I don't agree, and I'm never going to. Honestly, I don't even see the point in continuing this debate when we're coming from such polar opposite directions. As far as I'm concerned, let's just agree to disagree.

So, I guess we can agree that we totally disagree on this one. But honestly, I just can't help myself—I have to point out that bullies are usually just victims themselves... kind of like how people who are constantly whining haven't really learned how to stand on their own two feet or fight for what they want. Neither path is exactly "good," if you know what I mean. And look, you say you’re being "authentic," but let’s be real—nobody actually is. It’s kind of an illusion... I mean, just try walking into a meeting with a bunch of strangers and see how much "authenticity" you have left. You’re gonna feel awkward, you'll play it safe, and you won't be spilling your entire life story to people you barely know. In a professional setting, you aren't just dumping your private business on everyone—you keep a bit of distance. I could give you a million examples where we all lean into certain masks or roles just to get by... we throw things out there to protect ourselves or to reach a specific goal. And that’s exactly why we do it—to shield ourselves from the weakness and fragility we’re always talking about. We're just protecting ourselves from getting hurt, judged, misunderstood, or rejected... whatever you want to call it...
Look, those people you mentioned have definitely left a massive mark on the world—but hey, that was their call, right? That was their choice. Personally, I’m just not built that way, and honestly, that kind of lifestyle doesn't really appeal to me either, so I’m not one to judge... but giving up absolutely everything for everyone else? It just feels wrong. From a purely biological standpoint, it doesn't even make sense...

Joseph Bailey41 said:Donna, I honestly have no clue what you're talking about. What on earth does the economy have to do with the ideal of masculinity?

Sure, even without gender roles, men would still be men because of their biology. That holds up. (Well, not always, but that's beside the point). As for this "transfer of power," as a supposedly "clueless woman," I haven't seen anyone take away a man's manhood through policy. Period.

(And look, I don't really take the whole transgender thing seriously, no matter how much it makes me feel like a bad or politically incorrect person.)

I also don't see "feminized masculinity" becoming trendy. Most young guys I see are hitting the gym constantly or going for that rugged lumberjack look, growing out beards thick enough to hide a family of ferrets in.

And yeah, your fashion sense at the office shouldn't matter. Why should it? It's perfectly normal to expect skill, education, and knowledge regardless of what someone wears. Teamwork and success might be more critical in some jobs than others, but again—how does any of that relate to being a man?

Look, maybe I completely missed the point since I haven't watched the movie and don't plan to. Honestly, I'm pretty fed up with the PC feminists who mourn over men being unable to show emotion because of "the patriarchy." They brought these issues on themselves; they can deal with the consequences. It's not like women don't have plenty of our own problems to worry about.

Man, you clearly aren't getting it... Like, when you look at your boss at work—someone who might actually break down or get emotional—do you really see him as a leader, a pillar of strength, or someone with actual authority? Probably not, because those things just don't mesh. They never have...
If you can't see the propaganda being shoved down our throats through the media, that's on you. Maybe pay a little closer attention next time. There isn't a single show lately that doesn't feature gay or lesbian characters, or push this whole "charming femininity" vibe. Just look at what dominates fetish porn today. Young guys are obsessed with hitting the gym because of this modern cult of physique, and you can see the feminization everywhere if you just look at how guys dress, how they groom themselves, and the movies they watch...
The shift in power is basically castrating men. Men don't want dominant women, and they end up losing themselves playing submissive roles to them—and let's be real, women aren't looking for submissive men either. End of story, over and out...

placidharbor8 said:That's super interesting! Do you have any good reading material or resources on this? Or even a decent documentary? I'm actually quite fascinated by this whole anthropological angle.🙂
My views are really just my own personal deductions and logic, so I’m definitely not claiming they're absolute truth, though I realize I could have phrased things a bit better.

Do you really think this pyramid holds up when you look at modern society? I feel like there's so much room for debate there.
It also seems to depend heavily on where you are in the world. I'd imagine the hierarchy looks a little different for someone living in the US compared to someone in sub-Saharan Africa. Maybe only the bottom two tiers are universal.

The first two levels are universal since they're basically the foundation for our biology and mental health. Without them, nothing else matters..
The higher levels are all about individual potential and skill sets... but let's be real, only a tiny few—like, seriously rare—ever actually hit the top of the pyramid..

placidharbor8 said:So, do you actually have anything in writing to support that claim? Because the world is way too complex to just throw around generalizations like that.

It really comes down to perspective and your own internal logic, I suppose. You keep using the word "success," but that's such a broad term, isn't it? It doesn't mean the same thing to everyone.

When you say someone was "successful" in this context, what are we talking about? Are you thinking of the guy who took out the most members of a rival tribe, or maybe the hunter who brought home the most meat, or perhaps the one who actually raised and guided his offspring well? I'd love some clarification there.

Reading your post, it feels like you're focusing entirely on raw, brute strength, almost as if you're forgetting that humans are, first and foremost, emotional creatures.

Look, we aren't primarily emotional creatures—that’s just nonsense. It all starts with our basic instincts and those raw physiological needs first... then you move into stuff like security, order, and justice, and only after all that do we even get around to worrying about our emotional needs...
I can't see the image you linked, but if you drop the text or the context behind it, I'll get to work rewriting it for you. Just let me know what the vibe is!
So, looking back at how things used to work—back in the day, success was really just about being the person who could check the boxes for what the group needed most. It was all about hierarchy, you know? Once you took care of the basics, you moved on to the next level of needs, and so on... Like, if everyone was starving, the hero was the one who could actually put food on the table. If there was a war brewing, it was the person who could provide safety and a sense of security. And when you're talking about building a home and a family, it’s all about that deep connection—love and affection, stuff like that...

placidharbor8 said:Hmm, you know, I feel like what we're seeing is really just generational conditioning and learned expectations. If you were to take a quick look back at primitive Homo sapiens and our early ancestors, you'd probably realize there weren't these rigid, strict divisions between "male" and "female" jobs. A woman had to be just as capable at combat skills if she needed to protect her tribe, her village, or her kids when the situation called for it. On the flip side, a man had to lead by example to teach his sons to respect mothers and other women in the group, and he definitely had to develop an emotional side, otherwise, he wouldn't be able to sustain a family or find a mate. Back then, nobody was stuck in such a narrow mold of behavior; everyone had to step up and do a bit of everything depending on the need. But since things aren't like that anymore in modern America, I don't think anyone has the right to dictate what is "normal" and what isn't. At most, you could say, "Well, that’s what seems normal to me."

Do you actually have any written proof for that theory..? Or is this just guesswork, kind of like saying "this is probably what dinosaurs looked like"... My take is that the strongest, most successful guys always had a better shot at being fathers—and honestly, that hasn't changed, it's just basic biology...

Andrew Doyle said:A moment ago, you were talking about tears, not an emotional breakdown. Or are you conflating the two? (Please define exactly what you mean by "breakdown" so we can avoid any more of this communication noise)

And do you honestly believe that in such a scenario—showing vulnerability—a parent loses their authority? (I’m assuming you actually understand the definition of authority and realize there are various different types of it)

To me, breaking down means losing your emotional footing—like going into hysterics, sobbing uncontrollably, or total despair... stuff nobody wants to deal with, especially kids.
And if we're talking about crying, let's be real—in everyday life, we rarely find ourselves weeping in front of people. Unless it's losing someone close or some massive life shock, most of us only let it out during those rare moments of pure joy or maybe after a really heavy movie scene...
Just as a side note, I grew up in a household where emotional outbursts were pretty much a daily occurrence...
Parental authority is all about trust and respect, which is something you actually have to earn from your kids. I'm not a fan of being overly strict, but hey, rules are rules. Personally, I think a parent loses their grip when they show too much weakness—because a kid needs someone they can lean on, someone who gets them and can actually help. If the adult loses their footing and can't step up, that child's respect usually goes right out the window... Plus, parents should push their kids to reach their full potential in a healthy way, and sometimes that means grit, gritting your teeth, and holding back the tears...

Andrew Doyle said:Are you actually serious?
What am I supposed to do instead? Am I expected to play some kind of superhero parent because crying is somehow... an undesirable human reaction that needs to be suppressed? Is it a sign of weakness? Are we telling kids they should only ever see this sanitized image of courage?

alone, and you know why—because regardless of how much women express their emotions, we all know how they can be jealous, malicious, vengeful, and incredibly skilled manipulators...

Just women? Not men?

People don't go to war because men feel like men and are so pumped up on testosterone that they can't accept anyone else's opinion or way of life, making it easier to judge others and seize more rights for themselves.

It isn't just men fighting wars; women fight them too. And it has absolutely nothing to do with testosterone levels—it's about money. Wars are fought for money. Period. That is the entire philosophy of warfare.

Look, every parent is basically a superhero—raising kids is one of the hardest jobs out there. If a parent wants to maintain authority, they also need to avoid falling apart in front of their kids. Kids tend to take on the guilt and responsibility for their parents' struggles, and usually, they actually do... There’s really no point in dumping our problems or fragile emotional states onto them, because it hits kids pretty hard..
Exactly. Both men and women have their own behavioral flaws, and let's face it—tears aren't some magic recipe for happiness, nor are they a solution to stop wars, aggression, or whatever else...
I'm with you, people fight for power and profit...

Jeffrey Ramos4 said:When we talk about sex, we’re talking about biology—it's hardwired through genetics, neuroanatomy, and all that. Gender, on the other hand, is a social construct. Everything you guys are bringing up regarding upbringing, media influence, and environment falls into that second category. While research still points toward slight anatomical differences in certain brain structures, those aren't set in stone. Because of neuroplasticity, our environment can actually reshape how our brains function... which means those biological gaps could potentially be narrowed. That’s where the surroundings come into play. As long as society remains closed off to change and insists on everyone acting like carbon copies of one another, nothing is going to shift. It all starts at home. It begins with the family, then moves to preschool and school, then peer pressure, then the media, and so on. Change starts with the individual. If you buy your son a baseball and your daughter a pink dress, you've already started pushing them into stereotyped roles. As parents, you are their primary blueprint. Kids are sponges. You can tell them one thing, but if your actions say something else, you're just setting a bad example. If prospective parents actually had access to proper education and preparation, maybe things would look different from the jump. As for biological sex itself, given how fast science is moving, we might one day all be born intersex. Maybe that will even be an evolutionary leap—an adaptation. I mean, what is the point of rigid sexes anyway? Why should love between two people be dictated by both sex and gender? One day, we might not even exist in this physical form. Conception, pregnancy, childbirth... none of that might even work the way it does now. What will people invent to replace these old stereotypes and biases? Unfortunately, humans will always find a reason...

I totally agree that parents should be educated on how to raise kids and understand their needs. Nobody really prepares us for parenthood, so when we have kids, we're basically left to our own devices—just trying to figure it out and using whatever parenting styles we think are right. And more often than not, we just end up repeating the exact same patterns our own parents used on us.
You brought up the whole debate between gender roles and biological predisposition. Honestly, in today's world, it's incredibly hard to untangle the two because they're so intertwined. We can't just pop people into an incubator to see what's purely biological versus what's learned or forced behavior, and I don't think we ever will be able to tell them apart. That’s why this topic is such a lightning rod for different perspectives—people have been fighting over this forever, whether it's in religious circles or medical studies.
Personally, I think having different sexes is a biological necessity—it's the result of millions of years of evolution for a reason, regardless of what we think about it. Men and women have different biological needs and react differently, and I honestly think that's a strength rather than a flaw...

Sean Kern2 said:Donna White50,

The only thing actually funny about this thread is how you’re choosing to respond to my take with nothing but pure aggression and insults while trying to dismiss what I actually said. Honestly, I'm not going to let you drag me down into the mud with you for a dozen different reasons. Besides, it’s pretty clear you don't have anything to teach me, so there's really no point in you even trying.

I never once said the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine"—that’s just your own skewed interpretation of my words. I don't make a distinction between "male" and "female" behavior as such, though I can certainly spot those caricatures people try to pass off as "masculinity" or "femininity." But I’m extremely good at detecting whether someone is being decent or disrespectful, or if they're using aggression instead of actual arguments. I attach those traits to the individual, not their gender. And I don't tolerate aggression, especially when it's thrown at me as a response to showing empathy.

Manipulative, dramatic women are the exact polar opposite of aggressive men—period. Both are just masks; both sides are playing parts, turning their own lives into some kind of staged theater. Real authenticity and personal integrity are something else entirely, lightyears away from those roles. Authentic people, regardless of gender, don't feel the need to wage war on any level. Suppressing emotions leads to an emotional numbness that often spirals into violence, particularly with men, since society implicitly or explicitly encourages it as the ultimate proof of "manliness." And that's how we end up with domestic, social, and international violence—it was made incredibly vivid in that movie, and I shouldn't have to explain it since you claim to have watched it a few times already.

Then there's your other wildly rude interpretation regarding my colleague—I didn't judge him; I simply kept my distance because there was zero emotional connection coming from his side. And I wasn't the only one who felt that way. When people are emotionally stunted, they don't just lock away sadness—they lock away warmth, empathy, joy, anger—pretty much everything. A person starts acting like a robot. My point was simply that it is incredibly difficult to figure out the right way to interact with someone like that.

Obviously, it's essential to stay in touch with your own emotions, regardless of whether you're a man or a woman. But I see now that I'm wasting my breath because you insist on thinking in these black-and-white, gendered boxes, even though I've already explicitly stated that emotions are inherent to humanity and anyone who suppresses them is primarily doing a disservice to themselves. That person could be a woman or a man. That's all there is to it.

So if I’m really such an annoying person to talk to and I’m supposedly insulting you... why are you even wasting your breath on me? Honestly... and now, let's get back to the actual arguments...
Look, you didn't just judge him—you basically shut him out entirely. There’s a huge difference between avoiding someone and actually condemning them for who they are. You claim to be this super tolerant, empathetic person, but if that were true, you probably would've shown some genuine interest in his perspective... maybe even offered a little support or a listening ear to help him open up about how much he's struggling. Instead, you just turned your back on him. I mean, what business do you even have with someone like that? At the end of the day, you have every right to not like certain people or choose not to hang out with them—just like I have zero patience for people who act overly soft or wishy-washy. But also, that idea that people who can't express sadness are somehow "stuck" and missing out on other emotions? That's just not true at all, there's no science to back that up... Some people deal with depression by just retreating inward—pulling away from the world to protect themselves from the pain. In those cases, they kind of go numb to everything around them. Usually, it's just a temporary thing, too... most people eventually find their footing again and come back to themselves.
When you look at those extreme cases of abuse and harassment—it's pretty obvious they trigger these massive behavioral outbursts and deep-seated mental struggles that people just carry around with them forever... So, I guess the movie uses those intense scenarios to really paint the full picture of what we're dealing with...
Look, let me break it down—boys grow up, and playing games is just part of the deal. It’s how they test their strength, figure out who’s in charge, and measure their own success. Honestly, it’s just biological wiring meant to ensure survival... so while the boys are busy racing cars or acting out little war games to test their grit, women tend to lean into that whole vibe of being nurturing and magnetic. That’s just how the deck is stacked. It’s always been this way, and frankly, it’s perfectly natural. I don't have much faith in psychiatry, but even so, no shrink should be walking around pushing their own baseless opinions about how we "need" to change this. It's even worse when they try to label these natural behaviors as negative or something that needs to be suppressed. Their job isn't to redesign human nature—it's to deal with the extreme, antisocial stuff that actually breaks society. That's where their expertise should stay... anything else is just noise...
I guess my black-and-white outlook makes sense, considering how people over here act like extreme behavior is just the norm—like it’s some kind of reflection of what everyone is actually doing... which, honestly, isn't true at all. If we're going to talk about extremes, then I’ve got every right to use an extreme lens and a bit of a binary framework too. To wrap this up, let's face it: we all wear masks. They’re just part of life, really—a way to protect our privacy and keep ourselves from being too vulnerable around others. Suppressing your feelings has always been a survival mechanism in society, and it’s a total illusion to think that being wide open and showing vulnerability in such a dangerous world is actually going to pay off. Everyone needs to find their own way to express what they're feeling in a way that works for them, and there are plenty of ways out there once you learn how... People love watching those documentaries about peace and love in the world because it's easy to swallow, but the reality is that those things have zero basis in actual practice. The bitter truth we all live in—the one we can't escape—is that it's simply impossible to satisfy everyone's individual wants and needs...

Thomas Nelson25

Jason Taylor said:When parents act out of fear, they end up teaching their kids this narrow, one-dimensional way of feeling things, which basically robs them of a full spectrum of human experience and emotion.

Building a solid personality really depends on empowering a child emotionally while also knowing when to step back and let them go. A lot of times, moms find it incredibly hard to let go, which stops the kid from ever truly becoming self-reliant or confident.
And that's exactly why we end up with men who are obsessed with status symbols and driving a brand new BMW just to prove something.

The real kicker is that a parent can't teach a child something they haven't mastered themselves. So, that ignorance and those flawed approaches just get passed down from parent to child, piling up through the generations.

You don't always have to lay every single emotion out on the table—honestly, just letting kids know they have the space to vent and talk about how they’re feeling is usually enough... The real issue is when all that negative stuff just sits there, building up and staying bottled inside for way too long. People who are actually mentally resilient and steady don't just snap under pressure, you know? But let's be real—most parents just aren't teaching their kids how to do that...
Look, let's be real—status, cash, and a sweet ride aren't just random things. They’re basically the roadmap to success. If a guy knows that having a fat bank account and a nice car is what actually draws women in, then yeah, he’s gonna go after that money and those wheels. That's just how society views value, right? And when you're young, you're just out there hungry for attention, dating, hanging out, and trying to get that respect from the crowd. Honestly, guys are just playing the game to fit in with whatever the people around them expect...

Thomas Nelson25

Sean Kern2 said:Killer thread, Barbie.

I’m signing off on this entire post. It’s wild how the media constantly pushes women toward being these mindless Barbies with surgically enhanced assets, all just so the beauty industry can milk them for every cent. Meanwhile, guys are being told that hitting the gym is practically a religious requirement—this constant hyper-masculinity paired with hyper-femininity creates this spectrum of traits that leaves entire generations totally broken (I see it every single day in my own life, just watching people fall for these endless stereotypes). And honestly, what even are we talking about here when people actually consider porn stars to be "celebrities"?

The USA is basically a black hole of distorted values that’s been busy warping the whole damn Earth (and my forum feed is living proof, though I wish it were just the forum).

I had this colleague—your typical guy —who lost his father, his mother, and his brother (who took his own life) all within three years. Every single time he came back to work after about twenty days, he hadn't changed a bit; he didn't show a shred of emotion. He was exactly the same as before—calm, cracking jokes during breaks. For a couple of years, I actually avoided him because he gave me such an intense sense of unease. Eventually, things happened where I got to know him better and realized he was a decent person, but if I hadn't, I would've kept my distance forever. This kind of emotional numbness doesn't do anyone any favors, personally or socially—it’s just a massive minefield of potential disasters.

Just imagine for a second if, instead of "act like a man" or "act like a lady," the mantra for kids was:

Be a human being. Treat the people around you with respect, because they'll give it right back to you.

A whole laundry list of issues, including the suppression of feminine (🤦) emotions like sadness, could be solved in one fell swoop. Just like misogyny, misandry, violence, xenophobia, and wars would pretty much just fizzle out on their own.

I know I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...

Pretty much impossible, or you just don't.

Honestly, I only saw my own father cry once. My reaction was the total opposite of yours—I was just a teenager, staring at him in this weirdly fascinated way, thinking something like, "Huh, so he really is just human after all." Not that I thought those exact words, but you know, something along those lines.

😁

Are you even sure we watched the same damn documentary? 😁 This whole defensive "threatened masculinity" routine is purely your own subjective take and has absolutely nothing to do with what was actually presented. If you had actually paid attention, you would have seen that the discussion on social constructs in boyhood was handled equally by both men and women; you would have noticed the psychologists pointing out how psychological tests for boys and girls overlap in over 90% of results; and you would have heard the neuroscientists talking about brain plasticity rather than these supposed "innate" differences between the sexes.

Try watching it again through the eyes of a neutral observer, because believe it or not, it was actually filmed from a position of empathy toward men (not from your imaginary crusade against "masculinity"). Or, hey, just stay stuck in that atavistic mindset of the man as the provider, protector, and conqueror (and let's be real, your avatar is hyper-masculine, which is pretty telling)—I'm sure you'll find your little herd to run with.

You're talking nonsense and honestly, you've had a grudge against me since that last thread, and you're just projecting it here.
Look, let me put it this way: when you're an athlete competing, there's no room for tears. When you're defending yourself, there's no room for emotions or crying. At work or in a business meeting, there's no room for tears, weakness, or being overly empathetic. When you're raising a kid, there's no room for crying in front of them... Is that really so hard to wrap your head around?
You can't just label masculinity as inherently bad, and you have zero proof that the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine." And frankly, you know why—even if women express their emotions freely, we all know they can be jealous, spiteful, vengeful, or master manipulators. So, guaranteeing emotional expression doesn't guarantee peace or happiness in the world. Also, people don't go to war just because men feel "manly" or are pumped up on testosterone; it's more about the fundamental inability to accept different opinions or lifestyles. It's easier to judge others and try to grab more power for yourself.
By the way, you're being pretty ridiculous with that example of someone losing loved ones in a short time. Mourning is a personal process—it isn't universal. Everyone goes through it differently, so him being that way doesn't make him a bad person, and you shouldn't be judging him. That's just... not very human of you.
And just to be clear, growing up, I was never into sports, aggression, or acting cold. I've been a pacifist since I can remember—someone who hates weapons and conflict and just tries to understand people's differences. Even so, I don't agree with you (and yes, I watched the documentary twice) no matter how much you want to put me in a specific little box. Nor do I think tears are the only way to show humanity, which I've explained before... because sometimes, when things go wrong, you just have to roll up your sleeves, get to work, give it your all, and grit your teeth. Crying and whining won't solve anything. The movie is garbage because it tries to use empathy to push the idea that masculinity is a bad trait and that men and women should always express every emotion without any masks—which is just a total illusion and a utopia. It's never happened, and it never will...

placidharbor8 said:But then again, it really all boils down to how you personally define success. Is it money, power, building a family, having a healthy relationship with your community, or something else entirely? If you view the whole world through the lens of dollars and cents and economic standing, then success for you might actually require someone else's downfall.

That trend of suppressing masculinity you mentioned? You see it everywhere in celebrity lifestyles, but if you take a second to look around your actual neighborhood, you'll realize those people are actually in the minority. The big issue is that people soak up everything they see on TV and the internet as if it's happening to everyone, like it's the universal standard for daily life. Most of what's flashed on those screens actually only applies to a tiny fraction—a very small percentage—of the population.

If you're observant and you actually pay attention to what's going on around you, I think your behavior should reflect that reality. No man chooses to lean into feminization unless he thinks it's going to bring him some sort of benefit within that perceived "majority" he thinks represents society. To me, it just looks like an obsession with trying to "fit in" with modernity and becoming overly dependent on what other people think. But hey, that's just my two cents.

I think you’re way off base with that take... honestly, just look around. Everyone is out here grinding—trying to climb the ladder, stack some cash, and just make sure they're set for life. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have or if you're living large in a penthouse in NYC or just scraping by—it's the same story. That whole drive for profit and building wealth? That’s basically the engine under the hood of the economy. It's what keeps everything moving. Sure, you’ve got people who intentionally opt out of the rat race, but even then, they still need to pay the bills, right?...
It’s that same old story—everything being spoon-fed to us through the TV is basically setting the blueprint for the younger generation. It's all so caricatured... like, if the media decided tomorrow that it was suddenly "cool" for guys to wear skirts, you'd see crowds of kids hitting the streets trying to pull it off just because they saw it on a screen. Honestly, if the media didn't have such a massive grip on our life choices—especially since kids are still out there trying to find themselves and looking for role models—the entire advertising industry wouldn't even exist. There wouldn't be a single commercial on the air... But instead, what we're seeing is this toxic cocktail of hypnosis and pure manipulation. They take everything we know about our own insecurities and how easily we can be swayed, and they bake it right into whatever they're pushing as "in," "trendy," or "must-have"... it's pretty wild when you think about it...

Thomas Nelson25

Jason Taylor said:My dad is actually super sensitive, gentle, and caring—but honestly, he never lost an ounce of that strength needed to protect me or just be there when things got real.
But apparently, those exact traits—being sensitive and tender—are strictly off-limits for men, right?
I’ll never forget when our dog passed away; my dad was crying his eyes out like a heartbroken kid, and my mom just started tearing into him, saying it was embarrassing for a grown man to cry like some total softie. It seriously pissed me off because, I mean, I knew deep down that my dad had every right to cry if he was hurting, regardless of how old he was or the fact that he's a guy.

That kind of rigid, stifling upbringing doesn't do anyone any favors—it basically just grooms men for violence that someone else is going to profit from later on.

I only ever saw my dad break down once—it was after my mom spent hours picking at him, manipulating the situation until he just completely snapped under the weight of it all... It was honestly gut-wrenching seeing him like that, especially since I’d always looked up to him as this unshakable pillar of strength. Real authority figures aren't supposed to crumble or weep in front of the people who rely on them to stay steady and keep things together. When a kid sees a parent constantly breaking down like that, they don't learn empathy or how to process emotions—they just feel threatened. They end up having to step up prematurely, trying to play the "strong one" to comfort their parent and keep the family from falling apart. Kids can sense negative vibes and a lack of stability from a mile away... Honestly, parents really shouldn't be fighting, crying, or spiraling in front of their kids. It just leaves them feeling unsafe and totally overwhelmed...
Honestly, kids should definitely be allowed to cry when they're little—it's just part of growing up—but as they get older, they really need to start finding some stability and learning how to manage those big feelings. I actually think it’s a good idea to teach them how to pick their moments, too... you know, choosing a private time and place to let it all out so they aren't breaking down in front of everyone else. We should be teaching teenagers how to vent that emotional pressure before it builds up too much—you don't want them getting to that point where they just completely fall apart... It's all about balance, really. Every extreme is pretty bad—like, it’s just as wrong for a parent to have zero empathy for what a kid is going through or to totally ignore their emotional needs and just fail at parenting...

placidharbor8 said:Nowadays, modern society basically tries to dictate exactly how a man should act and what his "ideal" version looks like, while simultaneously pushing a very specific template for what an ideal woman should be. But honestly, the reality is nothing like those stereotypes, because trying to generalize people like that just ends up being toxic for everyone involved.

At the end of the day, we’re emotional creatures through and through, and when we try to run away from our feelings, it really messes with both our mental health and our physical bodies. Scientists have actually proven that when we bottle up intense emotions, our brains release certain chemicals that create this kind of internal chaos—it’s almost like we’re poisoning ourselves from the inside out.

We’re constantly being told to chase that "alpha" lifestyle—to be dominant, to be the absolute best, and to reach the top, even if it means stepping on others or causing someone else to suffer. It’s been pushed as the ultimate life goal, where success is defined by being at the peak with everyone else beneath you. To me, that feels like a sickness that only breeds division and resentment within our communities.

I personally feel like most people don't actually want to behave the way they do in certain social situations; deep down, I think most of us value much more honest, genuine qualities in one another. So, what stops us? It's usually that paralyzing fear of being judged by society for not following the "rules," or the fear of losing friends or partners. It’s hard to realize that the other person is likely feeling the exact same pressure and doesn't want to play along with these forced social scripts either. It feels like we’ve all collectively become a bit cold toward one another—and I’m certainly not excluding myself from that, as I’ve become incredibly aware of both the individual and collective struggle we're facing.

All this stuff about having a "perfect" physique, the whole "no pain, no gain" mentality, the obsession with reaching the summit, and making goal-oriented focus a total lifestyle... it all just pushes people to shut themselves off and distance themselves from others. They convince themselves they’re these untouchable alphas who don't need anyone. I’ve noticed that it often takes people getting to their mid-30s or 40s before they finally realize that true success is actually about fulfilling your own real potential—developing skills that you are genuinely passionate about, rather than what the world expects of you. It’s about emotional intelligence, finding a deep connection with the people around you, and moving past those superficial opinions from the media, social networks, or chasing Facebook likes.

Look, we're part of a bigger machine here, and unfortunately, the way our economy works today is basically set up so that only a tiny handful can win at everyone else's expense. That's just the reality we're living in. It’s the driving force behind why so many young women are pushed to grind through college just so they can land those high-paying executive roles tomorrow—roles that, let's face it, usually end up going to men about 60% of the time anyway.
Masculinity and femininity define us, and even if gender roles didn't exist, biological patterns that shaped our species would still make men, well, men. What really bugs me, though, is this current trend where masculinity is being stripped away in every possible way, and power is being shifted from men to women across the board. The tragedy is that we haven't even come up with a new blueprint for men to follow; instead, we're seeing this push toward feminized masculinity and other lifestyles being treated as the new "in" thing.
Then you've got this massive clash between the old school and the new generations because of all these social shifts, and the modern man is basically losing his footing. Like, what you do with your family or whether you want to wear a skirt—that's your business, totally private. But in the workplace? People expect teamwork, expertise, skill, education, and results... if you don't bring that to the table, you're basically invisible.

Sam Robinson said:"We associate sexual contest with masculinity..." The Mask You Live In - documentary movie

"Awaken masculine," be an "alpha," act "cool," "real men don't cry," or "emotions are for weaklings"—these toxic, destructive clichés tear down boys, young men, and men alike. They strip away any chance at genuine, cooperative community. Yet, even on a forum like this, we still act shocked. We wonder why divorce rates are skyrocketing, why infidelity is so rampant, why there’s such profound emotional unavailability, or why we see so much violence and sexual assault... etc... ?

The Mask You Live In:

does a pretty solid job of documenting this exact issue, and I'd really like to open up a discussion about it with all of you. So, to my fellow members: what are your thoughts on this forced emotional inhibition? And what do you make of how men try to "compensate" for everything that is deemed "socially unacceptable" or "unutterable" through sex, alcohol, drugs, and other addictions? Is that truly the "only" path left for young men when they are crushed under this societal mandate? 🍿

Total garbage of a documentary that just goes on and on condemning masculinity in every single form. Honestly, my only takeaway is that it was probably funded by feminist groups trying their hardest to drive the final nail into the coffin of everything that makes us men. They throw out these extreme, baseless claims without any scientific backing, suggesting that being masculine is somehow "bad" and should be avoided when raising boys... It's honestly unwatchable!
I am so incredibly done with this kind of propaganda—done with feminism being pushed at the expense of men, done with forced feminization, done with pushing homosexuality, and done with stripping away men's rights and everything else that defines who we are. This documentary is nothing more than brainwashing.
Today, women are taught to be strong, self-aware, ambitious, dominant, and assertive... meanwhile, men are having the last bits of identity stripped away—the very things that give them a sense of purpose and belonging. It's disgusting to watch, truly disgusting...

restlessranger54 said:First off, I just want to say thanks to everyone for reaching out and showing support. Look, I know the diagnosis is what it is, but I’ve decided I’m moving forward regardless. What’s actually eating at me is figuring out how to stay positive through all the ups and downs of life—like, you have a steady job today, and tomorrow everything changes. I refuse to let this damn illness define my best years.
Some mom replied to my previous post, and honestly, I dig her perspective, though it feels like she's being driven by a ton of fear and anxiety. Sometimes I see it, sometimes I don't.
But at the end of the day, I really believe you just have to forge your own path, no matter how messy things look right now. That said, I still deal with that heavy sense of guilt whenever I decide to just do my own thing.

Don't let that guilt eat you alive. You've got that fear creeping in—that you can't handle it, or you aren't good enough, or that you should've just listened to others if you mess up (like your mom). But look, life isn't always gonna be perfect. We all screw up, we all do stupid stuff, and we make bad calls because that's how we LEARN... you've gotta get that experience through both the wins and the losses, there's no other way. You have every right to mess up, just like you have every right to be happy when things go right...

Just listen, your illness is a serious thing, and yeah, it shapes a lot of your life. But don't let the diagnosis haunt you or make you feel like you're "marked" by it. You've got a right to happiness just like anyone else—to work, to career stuff, love, just enjoying life... But you also have this massive responsibility to manage your health, which makes things way harder for you than they are for most people... especially when it comes to finding a job, where you really have to push yourself and maybe even lean on someone close (like a partner) to help you find and hold onto something steady...

Just keep moving forward...👍

restlessranger54 said:Hey everyone, glad to be here. 🙏 I’ll try to keep this brief.
I’m living at home in a small town. Until recently, I actually had a steady job.
Things at home are pretty messed up right now, and honestly, it all boils down to one thing 👎
The issue is my mother. In her mind, she is always 100% right about everything. It’s kind of embarrassing to admit I’m 30 years old and still typing out stuff like this, but here we go...

I’ve been dealing with MS for five years now. I’m not disabled or anything—I can still do just about whatever I want to do.🙏 My mom has always been the type to hover over me because I was sickly as a kid; she basically kept me under a glass dome so I wouldn't get sick again. But the real kicker is how toxic she gets with her words. On top of managing my health, my finances are super unstable right now. She constantly reminds me that I’d be absolutely nothing without her and that I’m basically doomed once she passes away.😲
Yesterday, she actually told me my future looks like a nursing home. 😲 I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years; he knows about my diagnosis and he couldn't care less about it. He’s fine. The problem is my mom. She keeps telling me he’s not someone I can rely on and that our relationship will probably fall apart because of my illness. There’s zero room for him in our relationship because, in her eyes, she’s the only one here to set me on the "right path." I would move out in a heartbeat if my job situation wasn't such a mess right now. So, what do I do? Any advice? She’s also against me getting married because she thinks since I don't have money, why would a husband want to support me? And kids? Forget about it. I'm not stupid enough to go there. I’ve tried every trick in the book to break through her delusions, but nothing works.
How do I stop letting her opinions get to me when she’s already screwed me over so much?

Look, just tell your mom straight up that nobody in this country ever actually starved to death—so she doesn't need to worry about you either. At the end of the day, everyone looks out for themselves, whether they do it well or not... And honestly? Remind her that she can't take all that property and money with her when she passes. Hopefully, she’ll leave a little something behind for you when the time comes... For now, just focus on taking care of yourself, and if things get rough down the road and you can't figure it out, you'll just have to deal with it then...

Look, you’re old enough to know better, and honestly, I think it’s incredibly brave how you’re tackling this diagnosis head-on... seriously, don't let your mom and her rigid way of thinking get under your skin anymore. You gotta live your life on your own terms—do what feels right for *you*, not what she thinks is best. Let her vent or complain if that's all she knows how to do, but don't let her negativity pull you down or hold you back just because of your health situation. Grab every single little moment you can and just keep moving forward... If you stumble once in a while, it's no big deal—it's just a temporary setback, and you'll just get back up and keep going. There are billions of people out there living their lives, dealing with ups and downs, and you’re just part of that cycle... tell your mom to focus on herself and her own business for a bit...😉

Not listening to her opinion basically means standing up to her—and let me tell you, those kinds of moms can get pretty intense if things aren't going exactly their way... If you haven't practiced setting boundaries yet, it’s gonna be rough. You'll probably deal with a ton of guilt and that heavy feeling of letting someone down... but honestly, it's necessary. At some point, you just have to cut that umbilical cord and finally become your own person...

analogviper9 said:In my view, you simply cannot fake being a genuinely good person. Once someone gains a bit of real-world experience, their true colors inevitably come out to play.

Regarding society at large, I've noticed a pattern: individuals with weak characters or low self-esteem tend to cling heavily to corrupt people.
It's because they eventually morph into that very same type of person themselves.
Perhaps it's fear—they see that perceived power and think they need to be near it to survive.

Speaking from experience, I truly believe it pays to be a good, moral person—but *only* if you back that goodness up with a backbone! If you are "good" but lack a firm stance, people will simply walk all over you.

Malice always finds its way back to haunt you, and let's face it: those kinds of people rarely enjoy a clear conscience. So, isn't it much better to sleep soundly at night knowing you've surrounded yourself with people who are actually well-meaning?

My own experience tells me that the most important thing is really the crowd you hang out with and the environment you grow up in. You've gotta keep in mind that you can't have a real conversation with an idiot—so, you aren't going to get anything positive out of bad people, and it works the same way for the good ones.
So, yeah, be picky about your friends and inner circle. In other parts of life where you're forced to deal with all sorts of losers, you just have to learn how to set boundaries. As kind, genuine people, we become prime targets for those who've learned how to exploit others... and those types love finding easy prey...

I think I'm going to raise my kids with that mindset—teaching them to respect everyone, but above all, to respect themselves... even if that means giving someone a taste of their own medicine when they deserve it.

Anonymous said:Sometimes I can’t help but feel like life would be a lot easier if I were just more ruthless. But honestly? That’s just not who I am, and I don't know how to function in an environment like that. Even when I’m surrounded by people who seem well-meaning on the surface—even though we all know deep down they’re total snakes—I still give them the benefit of the doubt until they eventually stab me in the back. When they do, I just end up feeling disappointed, angry, and heartbroken, wondering how this keeps happening to me. I truly love genuine, good people, but they tend to live in their own little bubbles. Nowadays, if you actually want to build a meaningful life and surround yourself with decent human beings, it feels like you have to fight through a gauntlet of chaos just to establish a sense of security and independence.

I’m curious to hear from you guys: how have you structured your lives to find peace? More importantly, how do you navigate around the materialists, the egoists, and those selfish power-trippers with warped values who seem to hold all the cards?

People are constantly drifting in and out of our lives... so seriously, don't be afraid to cut off anyone who doesn't fit your vibe... because making that space is the only way to make room for the ones who actually do.
It's even more vital to learn how to set hard boundaries with anyone trying to use you—whether it's your boss, family, acquaintances, or coworkers...
The biggest thing is knowing what you actually want and stopping the habit of trying to buy people's affection by being a doormat or sucking up to them just to be liked.
Just live for what matters to you, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Their lives are theirs, their desires are theirs, not yours... though obviously, you might need to wear a bit of a mask in public since people generally can't handle honesty, someone else's success, being smart, or having different ideas... others don't really care about who you are deep down, so only open up to the people where you truly feel that closeness and intimacy is mutual...
Respect yourself—your wants, your free time, your skills, and your knowledge. If you don't do that, nobody else will.

Look, you don't have to be a jerk or take stuff from others just to live a good, happy life... you just have to respect yourself and know how to set boundaries with everyone else...

Casey Hernandez72 said:Hi everyone, I haven't seen this specific topic mentioned anywhere else, and since I’m feeling a bit desperate to hear some unbiased perspectives, I decided to start a new thread. This might get a little long. I'm 20 years old and currently in my first year of law school in NYC. To be honest, I struggled at first because it was my first time being away from my family—and I'm very close to them—plus I ended up in an environment where I just couldn't focus on studying. I didn't really dive into the books until this second semester, and now I'm pulling 14-hour study sessions every single day. I barely allow myself any breaks; if I take even a five-minute breather, I'm hit with intense guilt. As for my memory, it used to be phenomenal, maybe even above average, but now it feels nonexistent. Even though I managed to pass Roman Law with an A—and anyone studying law knows how much effort that takes—and despite being incredibly sensitive and taking everything to heart, I feel like my brain has been fried. My concentration is gone, and I honestly feel like I have no will to live. Since February, I've been having panic attacks almost every day. I've also started quietly taking anti-anxiety medication just so I can fall asleep, but even when I do, I wake up feeling more exhausted than before. I've been drinking coffee by the gallon hoping it will help me focus, but damn it, it’s actually making things worse. All those hours I spend studying are essentially wasted because my concentration is so shot that I'm basically just forcing myself to sit there staring at pages. I've lost all motivation to study, and honestly, to live in general. I can't even remember the last time I went out with friends; I simply don't have the energy. Some people tell me it's because I don't know how to organize my time, but if I don't spend every waking moment with a textbook, I start panicking intensely and spiraling into drama. Basically, I check every single box for burnout syndrome. I've had a boyfriend for about ten months, but we only see each other roughly once every two weeks for a couple of hours. Because I'm studying so much, he's even started complaining that I'm neglecting him and that law school is more important to me—which is easy for him to say since he's working and supporting himself. My parents can see that I'm physically and mentally falling apart and that I can't go on like this. They've even suggested I switch to an easier major, but I could never forgive myself for doing that. I'm terrified of disappointing them. Now, the fall finals are approaching, and I really don't want to fail a year; I'm too proud for that. I'm the kind of person who believes in "all or nothing." But I'm realizing that I can't keep going like this and that this might be my last chance to actually prioritize my health. It was like this back in high school, too. I feel like I've made progress academically, but mentally, I'm stuck at the level of a 14-year-old. It's as if I stunted my emotional and mental development just to chase academic success. And yeah, I succeeded—I was one of the top students in my class—but now I'm realizing that doesn't mean anything if I'm like this. I lack basic social skills even though I'm 20; I feel like a social cripple. Being an introvert doesn't help, and I'm not someone who enjoys spending time with people who drain my energy anyway. Even this post is a total mess. I can't control my thoughts or my emotions, and it's all because of this damn law degree. I can't relax at all, and I don't know when the last time was that I took thirty minutes for myself without feeling guilty. I am an incredibly ambitious person, but I'm learning the hard way that everything has its limits. I'm posting this here hoping to get some objective feedback from people who aren't involved, just so I can get some direction on what I should do next.
Thanks in advance! 👍

Look, you don't "learn" everything—you just focus on the big stuff. Everything else? Just ignore it if it isn't worth the effort or the time. Make bullet points, highlight the key definitions, and honestly, just let the minor details slide... it’ll save you so much time.
And please, get it out of your head that you need an A on every single exam. Passing is enough. If you feel like your expectations are getting a bit too intense, just lower the bar...
Same goes for running to a doctor for antidepressants just to avoid spiraling into a psychosis or other nonsense—like panic attacks, OCD, burnout, or depression. Take care of your mental health first; make it your priority.
Having hobbies and downtime is huge because that's how you clear your head and shake off the stress... plus, it lets your body release all that tension you're carrying around every day. If you don't, that built-up pressure in your mind and body is gonna make you snap. Seriously, give yourself a 7-day break right now. Go somewhere quiet where you can actually relax, then maybe start studying for a couple of days before the actual test...
Just chill out. Not everything has to be perfect or a perfect score—trying to chase perfection will destroy you. You've gotta find a little bit of fun in whatever you're doing, instead of just grinding your teeth and pushing through... nobody can sustain that level of intensity forever, yet you're still forcing yourself to do it. Lower your standards a bit, otherwise, you're just going to burn out...

Eric Taylor4 said:I’ve been thinking lately about what truly drives us. I’m curious to know: what are your core life motivations? What is that internal spark that pushes you to keep moving forward, to level up, to actually enjoy the ride, and to keep fighting when things get tough?

Honestly, I’m all about that hedonism life... just taking things day by day and soaking up everything I can, especially those little moments that count. I try to filter out the noise—separating what really matters from what doesn't, my ego from the actual truth—just learning, experiencing everything, and finding out who I really am...😉

stormytinker40 said:Donna White50 I see your posts all over this board. You seem like a decent enough person, really, but since you’re constantly bringing up psychopathy, I feel like I have to push back on a few things you've said:

Would you step on people if it meant making life better for your own kid?

Do you think it's right to, say, divert a train that's about to hit five people on the tracks just so it kills one person on a different track instead?

What if that runaway train is carrying 100 passengers toward a cliff, but it's headed straight for your child? Would you switch the tracks then?

Do you actually have friends in your life?

Can you say with 110% certainty that you have even one "real" friend out there (setting family aside)?

And finally, since you love playing these games with questions you think reveal psychopathic traits—based on the answers to my questions, are *you* the psychopath?

Personally, I wouldn't hurt others just to give myself or my kid an edge. In those extreme, life-or-death moments, I’d do whatever it takes to protect my family... and honestly, I think anyone else would too. It feels like a basic survival instinct where we start looking for the "beast" inside us just to stay safe. A parent might jump under a train to save their kid or veer a vehicle off a cliff without even thinking about it. But man, those are heavy topics... everyone sees them differently...

That whole thing about choosing to save one person versus five strangers is basically a classic trick question designed to catch people who lack empathy or awareness of others. See, if you choose to save five people by deciding to kill one, you're essentially taking the weight of human destiny onto your own shoulders. That’s usually where the line is drawn between psychopathic and "normal" behavior. A psychopath will rationalize the math and decide killing one is better than losing five, whereas a normal person struggles because they can't just accept the weight of making a conscious choice that decides someone else's fate. 😉
Basically, people with psychopathic traits don't really get haunted by their conscience when they have to fire employees, send people off to war, let them suffer in harsh conditions, overwork them, or—in darker historical contexts—treat people like fuel for a furnace... they prioritize personal goals or cold logic over empathy. They'll just do whatever serves their interests, their tasks, or the company's bottom line...

stormybadger4 said:Like I said earlier, I'm not trying to hunt for attention or prove to anyone that I'm some kind of psychopath. I reached this conclusion simply because I recognize I possess most of those traits. Whether psychopathy is an official diagnosis or not doesn't matter; people just invented a term for a specific type of person—someone I happen to belong to—and that's the relevant part here. I don't consider myself a bad person, and I don't have any weird ego trips where I try to prove how "edgy" or "different" I am just to look cool. I don't care about that stuff. What I actually care about is understanding myself and seeing how people perceive my character. That's why this post is useful. I can't exactly walk up to someone I know in real life and start dumping this kind of stuff on them; I wouldn't say it to anyone.

Thanks for the comment.

No, I've never done anything like that to anyone. Part of the reason might be that I just haven't had enough life experience yet. I'm young, and I haven't had the opportunity or the need to screw someone over.

Absolutely. I came into this world alone and I'll leave it alone. No one else lives my life but me, so I always prioritize my own interests first. On the flip side, I think everyone else should look out for themselves too; that seems perfectly fine to me. I don't worry about other people's needs, and I don't expect anyone to go out of their way for mine.

But nothing is ever purely black and white. I wouldn't ruin someone's life just for some tiny, insignificant "reward." There are always exceptions.

Donna White50
Do you think it's okay to say, for example, divert a train that's about to crush five people lying on the tracks just so the train kills one single person on a different track instead?

It all depends on who those five people are versus who that one person is. If I don't know any of them personally, then yeah, I think sacrificing one person is fine. It’s just simple math.

Well, it depends on what you mean by "like that." If we're talking about some massive, ultimate life goal, I'd pretty much do almost anything—as long as it doesn't break the law. But if we're talking about smaller stuff, I'm willing to do something proportionally "lesser" or harmless, though again, it depends on the risks, the fallout, and all that.

Yeah, I do. I have plenty of friends, and most of them see me as the joker or the "entertainer" type. I'm definitely one of those guys who's always cracking jokes and keeping everyone laughing.

Fair enough.
As for the movies, I don't think I'm "lost" in them because I haven't actually sat down to watch a movie in ages. The last one I saw on this kind of topic was *American Psycho*, and that was probably a year ago.
Regarding the attention-seeking bit... This is a brand new account on this forum. Seeking attention would make sense if I had been here for years, if people actually knew me and I wanted to stir up some "breaking news" scandal to show my true colors or whatever. After this post, I won't even be using this account or hanging out on this forum anymore, so the only "attention" I'm getting is just having the chance to reply to a few posts.

Hope you're satisfied with the answers. Thanks for the comment.

I'm telling you again, I think you're just fishing for attention. You can't really claim to be a psychopath if your actions don't back it up. A psychopath isn't exactly going to start a thread on a forum just to let everyone tear them down—they're usually huge charmers who stay laser-focused on their own needs and success.
You've got some skewed values when it comes to how you judge others—whether that's just personality quirks or just unexpressed feelings and old wounds, I don't know—but I really don't think this whole story fits you at all.
Think about your actions for a second, especially that whole trolley problem scenario... we can't just decide to kill or hurt another living being for our own sake, because conscience actually matters. We all have flaws; nobody is perfect. People either show symptoms of an illness or they don't, but everyone's got a few screws loose in their head. If you had actually killed or intentionally hurt someone and felt zero remorse, you'd probably pass a psych eval and show actual psychopathic traits. You'd be confused why everyone else is horrified by your actions, because to you, it would have made perfect sense... but right now, you're just talking, and that's probably for the best.😉>

stormybadger4 said:The problem is that most people hear the word "psychopath" and immediately picture some violent maniac hell-bent on destroying your life. But if you actually take a second to read up on the clinical side of things, you'll realize that's just not how it works. Psychopathy is really defined by a total lack of empathy rather than just being physically aggressive or whatever else people assume.

And yeah, I'm with you there. Mental health disorders aren't binary—it's not like a light switch that's either on or off. It's a spectrum, and it's all about the degree to which someone experiences those traits.

Have you ever actually screwed someone over in your life? Like, stolen from them or trashed their reputation without feeling a single shred of guilt because you felt entitled to do it...? Do you think it's okay to just steamroll over people to get what you want...? Or like, would you pull the lever on that trolley problem to kill one person just to save five...? What kind of moves are you actually capable of making to get your way...? Do you even have real friends in your life...?

Honestly, I think you've watched way too many movies and now you're just trying to make everything about yourself...

She’s clearly venting some frustration—she can't say it to his face, so she probably just lets it all out by running the water to clear her head...

Check out this wild archive I found from the Los Angeles Times:

San Diego police have arrested 51-year-old San Diego resident Melinda Gates, who spent the last few months engaging in some pretty bizarre behavior: slashing tires of cars parked right outside the City Retirees Association. Gates would hang out with the seniors at the Association, playing cards or chess, chatting and cracking jokes, then tell everyone he was stepping out for a quick breath of air—only to sneak over to the parking lot and puncture several tires with a long screwdriver. He'd then stroll right back into the group, sitting down with his retired buddies as if nothing had happened. For months, the retirees were totally baffled, constantly finding their tires slashed and whispering about some "phantom" vandal using a tool to ruin their cars. Eventually, one of them, John Doe, couldn't take it anymore. Being a retired cop, he set a little trap one evening and caught Melinda Gates red-handed—he was literally pulling a screwdriver out of a nearby hiding spot and heading toward a car.
- I watched a few different people first until I finally caught him. It's honestly unbelievable how long he terrorized us. Nobody in the Association could even relax anymore because tires were being slashed day after day. I caught Gates in the act, yelled at him, but honestly, I think the guy needs a psychiatrist – says John Doe.
At the local precinct where Gates was questioned, they said the investigation is still ongoing before it heads to the Department of Justice. A bunch of San Diego retirees have already filed claims for damages since their cars were targets: Brother Klarica had all four tires slashed twice, Slobodan Mršić lost two tires on two separate occasions, Joe Vedrić got hit seven times, John Doe had four tires punctured, and Gates even went after the three-wheeled scooter belonging to Ilija Margarin, a well-known local disabled veteran. Vlad Tomić, Boško Ćosić, Jure Grbić, and Jacob Božić were all victims too. All of this went down in the same parking lot right in front of the Association near the old military base, and now the retirees finally get why their buddy was so often "stepping out for fresh air" mid-game.

SAN DIEGO — A group of local retirees filed legal claims this Wednesday before Judge Boris Radman at the San Diego Municipal Court against 52-year-old Milka Hromić, who spent months slashing tires in the parking lot outside the City Retirees Association in San Diego. For months, the seniors dealt with the terror of an unknown "phantom with a screwdriver" who randomly targeted their vehicles, until they finally set an ambush within their own organization and caught Hromić. Charges for destruction of property have been filed, and prosecutor Tomislav Jurlina is seeking a fine for Hromić.
Instead of showing up to court, the defendant, Hromić, sent a telegram to the judge on Wednesday morning. "Please excuse my absence; I have to attend a check-up at the psychiatric hospital," Hromić wrote. The retirees were furious, pointing out he wasn't actually at the clinic since they had just spotted him hanging around his own yard. Judge Radman recorded the retirees' claims on Wednesday, amidst a loud outcry from the group regarding Hromić's failure to appear.
Hromić was a local who used to hang out with the retirees at the Association, playing cards and chess. He was always chatty and in good spirits, then he'd step out "for air." No one suspected a thing while he was grabbing a screwdriver from his stash to slash tires, because he'd always come back acting completely normal. This went on for months, repeatedly targeting people like Brother Klarica, Jure Grbić, Slobodan Mršić, Joe Vedrić, John Doe, and others, and he even slashed the tires on the modest three-wheeled scooter used by Ilija Margarin, a prominent local man with a disability.

The San Diego "Phantom with a Screwdriver" finally caught...
three months probation
SAN DIEGO — Look, I know what I did, and man, am I sorry. I feel terrible about the whole thing. I really regret it, and I promise—seriously, I promise—it’ll never happen again... said Milko Hromić (52) while standing in front of the San Diego Municipal Court. He ended up there because, for months, he was sneaking around in the dark outside the City Retirees Association, slashing the tires of his own buddies. Judge Boris Radman found Hromić guilty and handed him a three-month suspended prison sentence with a one-year probationary period.
In his defense, Hromić basically admitted to everything he popped. He told the court how much he regretted targeting his good friends—the same guys he’d sit and play cards or chess with at the Association over on Main Street while sipping on some cheap drinks. He even tried telling the judge that his mental health hasn't been the best lately. Since losing his job after things went south at his old workplace, he spends most of his time hanging out at the Association, mostly because the drinks there are dirt cheap...
Since this tire-slashing spree outside the Association dragged on for months, people in San Diego started calling him the "phantom with a screwdriver"—all because the retirees themselves didn't think to set a trap and figure out who was doing it. It was a total shock to them that it was actually one of their own friends—someone they'd just been playing games with—who kept doing it. Like, the guy once slashed the back tire on Joe Vedrić’s Vespa seven different times. Hromić was out there with his screwdriver from early June until late October last year, and he’s been convicted of property damage and destruction of property.