Posts by Lawrence Bailey77

crimsonfox26 said:Give yourself a break.

well, if we were to 😁

then I suppose one should apply that logic to everyone else equally... wouldn't that be fair? 😵

It actually strikes me as perhaps the finest piece of advice or life philosophy one could encounter... though I'm likely just being self-deprecating here.. 🕺

Respect to Jim T. 👍

I recall a rather profound perspective shared by a young woman I spoke with once—it was only for about two hours, mind you—but her insight was immensely helpful during that particular stretch of my life. I suppose I owe her a debt of gratitude.

After listening to me ramble for a bit, she offered something that, while not directly addressing my specific circumstances, resonated on a much deeper level. I won't linger on the details, though..

"Looking backward brings nothing but guilt" (regret and all that nonsense)
"Looking forward brings only fear" (that creeping anxiety, doubt, and wondering what might happen next)
"Stay in the present" .. being fully aware of who and where you are.. right now.

Those were her words, though this is merely my own interpretation after roughly fifteen years of reflecting on them. Still, I believe it's worth passing along.

Cheers.👍

Mark Diaz75 said:So, what was the point of even going to the concert?
I mean, I thought...
Looking for something "extra"?
Maybe try being the one who brings the energy to the group instead!

Cool! But are you actually cool?

I am quite the sensation. 🙂

neonsailor26 said:Nicholas Gonzalez8, my friend, you always seem to have such a brilliant perspective to share 🙂 .

If Nicholas Gonzalez8 doesn't earn the title of the forum's most well-meaning ambassador—and quite possibly the whole site—then I suppose I simply don't know what true goodwill looks like.

It’s more or less the same old story... I suppose I tend to work with the experienced ones less often nowadays... I try to fix the fallout from certain mistakes if it’s even possible... if not... then I just deal with the regret based on how much their "influence" lingers over me... though it isn't quite at the point where it haunts me or keeps me up at night.

I have plenty of much more pressing, "real-time" problems to deal with... and when those start triggering memories of past blunders... well, "regret" feels like a rather inadequate word for what actually goes on in my head.😵

For instance... episodes like that don't exactly pass smoothly without some medication involved.🍿

Andrew Price3 said:That sense of boredom is actually a summons—a call to become more than who you are right now.
Being afraid of boredom is really just being afraid that, in any given moment, you won't be acting as your true self or doing what you actually love.

So, lean into your nature. Have the courage to be yourself.

The man speaks with wisdom... I imagine dwelling on these thoughts might, if nothing else, help shatter that boredom.😉

Richard Wells said:Nick can't do a single thing without our permission 🙂

In my humble, perhaps overly cynical opinion, that sounds a bit schizophrenic... I hope my actual perspective on this is coming through clearly. It isn't quite as if you simply manifested your own circumstances from nothingness to begin with, and then things progressed from there... there has been a significant amount of interference directed at you, and frankly, I highly doubt that will ever truly cease. 👍

Austin Nelson2 said:The less you reveal about your vulnerabilities, the smaller the target on your back becomes. This is especially true when dealing with family—those relatives who have spent their entire lives finding clever ways to exploit your weaknesses. Keeping them at arm's length regarding your private struggles is simply better strategy. After all, you haven't cut ties with them yet, which means a certain level of performance is unavoidable for everyone involved. (Because let’s face it: who knows your buttons better than your own blood? They’ll see right through the act, but they’ll tolerate it because that’s just how the family dynamic works.)

But I suppose there is also a diminished chance of actually feeling anything at all—all those good things life offers, aside from the misery, tend to slip away too.

You end up living in the shadows... ( ) 😁

I have never once complained about being an outlier. On the contrary, I prefer to hold my own convictions rather than succumb to that primitive, almost infantile urge to belong to one of those schizophrenic cliques that will do anything to suck you into their orbit at any cost.

My take is that these types of groups simply require constant investment in shared illusions just to make life a little more bearable. It's easier to live a lie when reality proves too heavy for the human psyche to carry. Regardless of how many millennia of evolution we’ve endured, or the supposed benefits of forming tribes and communities... fear and stupidity eventually take their toll. There is no long-term future there—not if you define "healthy" as existing without someone else having to suffer or pay the price for those lies. This isn't about what you read in textbooks or the artificial systems people invent to justify their own inadequacies and their inability to manage their own limitations. It's about the laws of nature, God forbid the loss of human lives and the sheer potential of experience that gets wasted in the process.

You are either an individual or you are part of the herd. That's the plain truth, if I may be so blunt—though I really shouldn't dwell on it. I don't have the time. Life is far too short, people. I barely sleep at night. Twenty-four hours is simply not enough time in a day. I still have half the night left, and so much work remains to be done.🙂

location: Washington, D.C.
I suppose any meaningful connection is essentially impossible without honesty and a few fundamental pillars:

1. Mutual respect
2. Trust
3. Open communication

Everyone is more than welcome to reach out... provided there is an absence of prejudice or judgment... though, if I am being honest, my primary aim is simply to find good people—genuine friends. I am prepared to offer all of the above, but I suspect any relationship lacking reciprocity won't last very long anyway.

For various practical reasons, I imagine someone in their 30s would be the most ideal match, but as I said, anything is possible... whether it's just exchanging messages or meeting up, depending on what we both decide.

Best of luck to everyone!

P.S. I must say, I was somewhat pleasantly surprised by this thread... I hope the members here have some positive experiences. Cheers.👍

I suppose I am reading ☕

How does one actually come to terms with their own flaws?

Peace of mind 😁

I suppose you’ll have to find your own way through this, though I imagine this process of writing and talking things out is already part of the work. I tend to agree with the other folks here who suggest you might be being far too hard on yourself—perhaps even a bit too self-critical. It is possible that you simply set incredibly high standards and aim for massive goals... which, if I may say so, is quite respectable. Not many people actually have the nerve to pursue something like that. 😉

Best of luck. 👍

Reload this page How does one break free from the shackles of illusion?

By finally "waking up," I suppose. 😉

This voice just absolutely obliterates any sense of pressure 👍 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a01QQZyl-_I

I suppose one has to outgrow quite a bit of life's nonsense before true realization or liberation can even begin... don't let anyone convince you otherwise. I guess you should listen to everyone, but ultimately, you must listen to yourself. Be your own best friend. Always be honest with yourself
.
.. wishing you plenty of happiness in life .. and once you reach that point, you'll see how the pressure simply vanishes ... all that remains are your own inherent limitations, which you then work to expand as you continue building yourself and the world around you .. personally, I found my actual enjoyment of life only began when I turned away from societal expectations—basically, when I stopped feeling that nagging guilt about failing to meet the expectations of my family and other such civilized bullshit 😁

Donna White50 said:Kind of a weird way to look at things for someone whose entire life is basically dictated by power... you know? Like, the government, the laws, money, trade, your career... it’s all built on that foundation. Power, the law of the jungle, hierarchy... there isn't exactly much room for love or compassion in those spheres—it's just cold, hard reality...😛

Are you implying that I am being strange, or are you just complaining about how cruel the world is?

Forgive me, but I suspect you might need some professional guidance... I mean, how could you possibly know anything about me? Where on earth have we met, precisely? How could you claim to know what—or who—governs my life?

Why on earth do people lie so incessantly? Why is there such a desperate need to deny that there are individuals out there who don't simply bow down or sell their souls?

Why is there such an allergic reaction toward people who actually possess character and a backbone, instead of just blending into the crowd?

And then you moan about a lack of tolerance and love... it seems somewhat abnormal, perhaps, to lack even self-belief when you hold such cynical views...

Am I wrong here? Have I essentially contradicted myself? 😵

Queen of Spades .. I appreciate you! 🙏

Sam Robinson said:Don't go fooling yourself into thinking things are any different once you cross the borders of the Mediterranean...

It applies to everyone, really... personally, I tend to view those kinds of criticisms as mere excuses—perhaps even mitigating circumstances in a court of law, if one were inclined to be generous.

Garbage is garbage, regardless of who is being forgiven. 😛

I suppose I only truly trust my own child and myself... 👍 ...but if her social circle manages to brainwash her... well, then I’m just left standing there on my own. 😉.. and what can you really do? There are arguably much larger crises in life than matters of faith. 😁

Jerry Bishop4 said:I learned the exact same thing growing up. People just don't like hearing the truth.
Whenever I'm blunt, people tell me I sound harsh.
But if what I'm saying is logical and true, 😲 they still hate hearing it—whether it's about themselves, me, or anyone else.

If you don't expect anything from people, you won't end up getting screwed over. 😳

It's a fact.

I’ve just found myself getting worked up over Lazi again... I suppose I simply can't stomach listening to such pathetic individuals anymore.

It seems people have become so utterly miserable—so deeply entrenched in their own sense of inadequacy—that once they’ve convinced themselves of how wretched their existence truly is, they refuse to let anyone else express a different perspective on life or the environment they inhabit.

Oh, why must the world be so cruel? Why does it insist on being so harsh toward people? Why break them down only to transform them into these sort of deaf-and-mute zombies, scavenging for the brain matter of those who are actually resilient and immune to such trivial misfortunes?

Why am I even here? What is this place? Why does the header even say "forum"? It feels as though no one is happy; everyone is just drowning in sorrow. Life is nothing but a series of miseries. Good grief, it feels like one should just tear everything down to make a point... oh, god... no, I'm not losing my mind. I'll show them all.

...And thus, schizophrenia is born.👍

Power is nothing more than an illusion—a cocktail of deception, deceit, and outright fraud

.. it strikes me as one of the most glaring symptoms of a psychopath .. 😁

Love, on the other hand, is a genuine feeling .. at least for me ..

Donna White50 said:Oh, Great All-Powerful and All-Knowing one, please reveal to us the secret of love...😁
I separated love from infatuation a long time ago...
It clicked for me ages ago that love isn't about possession—it's about sharing, respect, acceptance, and giving both yourself and your partner the freedom to grow...
Things go sideways when desires, feelings, and dreams start drifting apart... then "love turns into" being demanding and pulling on the leash... but that's not love anymore... it's just a hungry, angry animal that's been neglected for months, if not years...
Nobody owns anyone, and nobody owes anyone anything... those are all just fictions in our heads... and love is just a pleasant fiction... because in reality, there's nothing exists besides this exact moment you're living in... burn out your brain and it's over—bye bye to love, feelings, the good, and the bad...🙂
That's about it from me...

🙂No, I think I'll pass .. I prefer to leave that particular pleasure to the individual. I feel no urge to convince anyone else of my specific philosophy or way of life, though I suppose I might offer a critique whenever the opportunity presents itself .. I'm just grateful for the love that kept me tethered to this life long enough to possess that ability and capacity

As for power, it can kiss my ass😁

Respect!

Hannah Alvarez2 said:Multitasking? 😁

Yeah. Total mood. I’m not trying to generalize everyone, but I hear it all the time back in California. That raspy female voice...

You'd probably make a killer math teacher.😁

multipass http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jWGbvemTag

👍

Go ahead and keep deluding yourselves if you must... but I find myself wondering why there is such an overwhelming need to convince everyone else that your specific definition of love is the correct one.

Actually, it would be far more interesting to hear about some actual, lived experiences—tangible manifestations of "your" versions of love... though perhaps I shouldn't even call them love.😛

Donna White50 said:It sounds like you and I are vibing on that same extreme frequency—that constant tug-of-war between being totally composed, hyper-controlled, and completely flawed, or between being primal and losing all restraint... if I'm reading you right...?
I don't think it has much to do with love, because true love doesn't really play in those extremes—love isn't about possession or micromanaging someone... but with passion and raw instinct? Oh, absolutely. Those are two extremes I find myself wrestling with constantly... finding peace through love, versus that wild energy through passion that just explodes out of nowhere when you least expect it...🙂

You talk about love as if it were a person... and I won't even say people talk about God in much the same way... but everything you're describing isn't actually love. Or rather, the terms you're using are already strictly defined elsewhere. You can do better than this.😉

.. I get the feeling you might eventually start showing off your special powers to us 😁 and as for love, I won't be hearing any more about it, not even a little bit.