Not wanting kids: Is it just me?

Gerald Scott4 said:If the law actually let me, I’d have gone through with a sterilization long ago. But obviously, that's not an option since the rules say I need to already have two kids and a husband😕 who has to sign off on everything too.🤮

😲😲

Is this some kind of sick joke?? 😕

Jesus...

Noah Fowler87 said:😲😲

Is this some kind of sick joke?? 😕

Jesus...

Which part exactly?

Gerald Scott4 said:Which part exactly?

I mean, everything you just laid out! Is that actually how it works? I find it hard to believe there’s an American law that vague and nonsensical...🙄

Is there actually any feeling worse than getting older and realizing you've got nobody by your side? At least, that’s what all the old folks I know keep telling me.

As far as I can gather regarding the current laws here in the States, you can opt for voluntary sterilization once you hit 35, or if you’re under 35, it’s usually only an option if your life is at risk or there's some serious genetic issue involved, or something along those lines. I suppose nobody else needs to sign off on it, unless, of course, the person isn't deemed mentally competent, in which case their legal guardians step in. Your husband doesn't get a say in the matter at all. 🤷

I recently sat my parents down and told them straight up that I don't want kids—and honestly, I have no idea if I'll ever change my mind—and my mother just snapped back with, "Well then, you might as well not live!" 🤣

feralcobra20 said:As far as I can gather regarding the current laws here in the States, you can opt for voluntary sterilization once you hit 35, or if you’re under 35, it’s usually only an option if your life is at risk or there's some serious genetic issue involved, or something along those lines. I suppose nobody else needs to sign off on it, unless, of course, the person isn't deemed mentally competent, in which case their legal guardians step in. Your husband doesn't get a say in the matter at all. 🤷

I recently sat my parents down and told them straight up that I don't want kids—and honestly, I have no idea if I'll ever change my mind—and my mother just snapped back with, "Well then, you might as well not live!" 🤣

😲,
I actually feel bad for people whose entire purpose in life is just reproducing. 😢
That's more of an animal instinct thing, but I thought humans were supposed to be at a slightly higher stage of evolution. Clearly, there are still plenty of primitives out there (sorry for grouping your mom in with them, but hey, facts are facts)

Michelle Sanchez8 said:Is there actually any feeling worse than getting older and realizing you've got nobody by your side? At least, that’s what all the old folks I know keep telling me.

And then there's the other side of the coin: reaching old age alone, even when you actually have children. 😲

I remember hearing about a case back in Chicago, where a man's son finally walked into his apartment only to find him deceased—the poor guy had been dead for an entire year before anyone noticed. ☕

If that elderly man hadn't had a son to leave everything to, he might have just passed away in the arms of some lovely young nurse instead. 😉

Noah Fowler87 said:I mean, everything you just laid out! Is that actually how it works? I find it hard to believe there’s an American law that vague and nonsensical...🙄

exactly....
it basically boils down to either a woman having cancer and needing everything removed, or she can't just decide to go through with a procedure like that on her own unless she already has two kids and her husband signs off on it.🙄🙄
It feels like you don't even own your own body anymore; instead, the government dictates that we have to provide them with more children, and then on top of that, the husband has to give his permission.🙄
There's really no point in arguing about this.

feralcobra20 said:As far as I can gather regarding the current laws here in the States, you can opt for voluntary sterilization once you hit 35, or if you’re under 35, it’s usually only an option if your life is at risk or there's some serious genetic issue involved, or something along those lines. I suppose nobody else needs to sign off on it, unless, of course, the person isn't deemed mentally competent, in which case their legal guardians step in. Your husband doesn't get a say in the matter at all. 🤷

I recently sat my parents down and told them straight up that I don't want kids—and honestly, I have no idea if I'll ever change my mind—and my mother just snapped back with, "Well then, you might as well not live!" 🤣

Yeah, but I'm saying people can't just walk in and demand the surgery on a whim; there has to be a medical necessity or some kind of extreme circumstance. Sure, someone over 35 can do it, but only under those specific conditions I mentioned. 🤮 Anyway, that's not even what this thread is about.

I'm not even going to touch that second paragraph.☕

Gerald Scott4 said:If the law actually let me, I’d have gone through with a sterilization long ago. But obviously, that's not an option since the rules say I need to already have two kids and a husband😕 who has to sign off on everything too.🤮

That raises a funny question, though—if a woman doesn't have a husband, who is supposed to sign the paperwork for her?

So, what if

Gerald Scott4 said:exactly....
it basically boils down to either a woman having cancer and needing everything removed, or she can't just decide to go through with a procedure like that on her own unless she already has two kids and her husband signs off on it.🙄🙄
It feels like you don't even own your own body anymore; instead, the government dictates that we have to provide them with more children, and then on top of that, the husband has to give his permission.🙄
There's really no point in arguing about this.

This is utterly pathological. Is this really the government's grand strategy to boost birth rates? It’s essentially saying, "We don't care if you don't want children; we want them, so deal with it, and we'll just sit here hoping fate takes its course." How can anyone call that anything other than pure hypocrisy? What kind of laws are we living under? 🙄

I am about 99% certain that these same restrictions don't apply to men—I assume they can just go get sterilized whenever the mood strikes them, right? Where is the logic in that?🙄

James Collins12 said:That raises a funny question, though—if a woman doesn't have a husband, who is supposed to sign the paperwork for her?

Nobody... but she’d better have at least two kids to make up for it. ☕

Michelle Sanchez8 said:Is there actually any feeling worse than getting older and realizing you've got nobody by your side? At least, that’s what all the old folks I know keep telling me.

Well, that sounds like a pretty wonderful motivation for having kids, doesn't it?

Noah Fowler87 said:Nobody... but she’d better have at least two kids to make up for it. ☕

It feels a bit strange to me that's the case, because, as far as I understand, she doesn't actually need anyone to sign off on an abortion, or does she?

Noah Fowler87 said:This is utterly pathological. Is this really the government's grand strategy to boost birth rates? It’s essentially saying, "We don't care if you don't want children; we want them, so deal with it, and we'll just sit here hoping fate takes its course." How can anyone call that anything other than pure hypocrisy? What kind of laws are we living under? 🙄

I am about 99% certain that these same restrictions don't apply to men—I assume they can just go get sterilized whenever the mood strikes them, right? Where is the logic in that?🙄

I actually suspect it applies to men as well.

James Collins12 said:It feels a bit strange to me that's the case, because, as far as I understand, she doesn't actually need anyone to sign off on an abortion, or does she?

Nobody needs to sign off on it. Honestly, our laws have absolutely zero logic left in them.

Noah Fowler87 said:This is utterly pathological. Is this really the government's grand strategy to boost birth rates? It’s essentially saying, "We don't care if you don't want children; we want them, so deal with it, and we'll just sit here hoping fate takes its course." How can anyone call that anything other than pure hypocrisy? What kind of laws are we living under? 🙄

I am about 99% certain that these same restrictions don't apply to men—I assume they can just go get sterilized whenever the mood strikes them, right? Where is the logic in that?🙄

I'm not totally sure about the guys, but I bet there's some loophole for them too.
Anyway, I'm with you on everything you said.👍

cosmicowl50 said:I suppose that kind of behavior would be perfectly acceptable for animals, but if my understanding of human evolution holds up—and I guess it mostly does—we’re supposed to be at a much more advanced stage of development, aren't we? Well, that is, assuming we aren't talking about certain primitive types out there... and honestly, forgive me for even grouping your mother into that category, but unfortunately, there are just so many of them wandering around these days.

Look, I’m not exactly trying to be her defense attorney here, but I’ve known her long enough to know she was just speaking out of pure, unadulterated panic—you know, that split second where you're terrified that your kid might be different or "off" in some way. Honestly, that kind of paralyzing fear is probably a whole separate conversation for a therapist to unpack, I guess. 😁

Gerald Scott4 said:Nobody needs to sign off on it. Honestly, our laws have absolutely zero logic left in them.

Look, could you please just drop a link to the specific section of the law you're talking about? I’ve been digging around through the legal codes and I honestly haven't found anything even remotely similar to what you're claiming, so it's starting to feel like we might just be dealing with a bunch of hearsay at this point. I mean, even if it were true, the whole thing sounds absolutely insane—honestly, even by the standards of our American judicial system, that would be a total stretch. 🤷

feralcobra20 said:Look, I’m not exactly trying to be her defense attorney here, but I’ve known her long enough to know she was just speaking out of pure, unadulterated panic—you know, that split second where you're terrified that your kid might be different or "off" in some way. Honestly, that kind of paralyzing fear is probably a whole separate conversation for a therapist to unpack, I guess. 😁

Look, could you please just drop a link to the specific section of the law you're talking about? I’ve been digging around through the legal codes and I honestly haven't found anything even remotely similar to what you're claiming, so it's starting to feel like we might just be dealing with a bunch of hearsay at this point. I mean, even if it were true, the whole thing sounds absolutely insane—honestly, even by the standards of our American judicial system, that would be a total stretch. 🤷

I know there's some kind of protocol out there somewhere... I just have no clue which statute it falls under.🤷
I've been hearing the rumors for years, so I'm pretty sure that's how it works. Apparently, there's a similar setup for men too, though I'm not entirely sure what their specific requirements are to qualify for the same thing.
Like I said, we're getting off track here; the real issue is the "lack of desire for children."