Posts by Sam Wright21

Matthew Booth16 said:I’ve got a bit of a situation here.

I’m heading into my sophomore year of high school. My grades are pretty much straight A's because I spend most of my time hitting the books. In class, I don't really talk—I just sit there and soak everything up, which probably makes me look a little weird to everyone else. People tell me I’m super smart, but I’m definitely not the social type. I don't say much, and when I do, I keep it short and sweet. Sometimes I feel like people just tune me out when I'm around. Honestly, I don't have any real friends yet—you know, people I actually hang out with who aren't family. I don't really go out because I don't have a crew to go with, and I'm not into drinking 🙂 either. I don't even listen to music. I'm constantly trying to level up and be the best version of myself—basically aiming for perfection—but lately, I feel like I'm just becoming this monotone, boring person. Outside of school, I almost never hang out with people my age. It makes me feel like I'm unapproachable... and honestly, just lonely. I really want to talk more... but what am I supposed to talk about? How do you even start a conversation? How do I find a real friend or actually connect with someone?
Everyone calls me a weirdo. To be honest, it doesn't bother me that they call me that, it bothers me because it feels true. Everyone wonders why I'm so quiet... but what is there to say? I stay silent because I feel like I have nothing to contribute. How do you learn to be funny? Is being witty something you're born with, or can you actually practice it? And how do you become someone people actually want to be around?
What should I do? Where do I even start? I just want to change everything right now...

Help me out!

Why don't you listen to music?

Good grief, this is just ridiculous. 🤣

rustymaker5 said:It’s pretty interesting how it seems like more and more people are actually killing their own sense of purpose by drowning themselves in this endless mountain of self-help books and spiritual guides... you know, searching for a "path" through all that paper clutter until the whole concept just loses its soul. I can't help but wonder why that happens...
Maybe it's because they're hunting for the wrong things entirely because, look, no matter how massive the selection of literature gets, there aren't any concrete answers tucked away in some chapter, there are no definitive instruction manuals, no guarantees of success, no shortcuts, and certainly nothing "quick-fix" style that most people seem to crave... plus, they're looking for these answers in other people instead of digging deep within themselves. I mean, sure, reading about someone else's philosophy or life lessons is fine—it helps us piece together our own little life puzzles—but at the end of the day, we have to be the ones to put those pieces together ourselves. Because nobody else can live your life for you, and we have to design and build our own existence without waiting for a savior to do it for us. We all have the same agency here—we all have our own thoughts and we all decide how we're going to react to whatever situation life throws our way... so, I think it's better to just gracefully accept that we're solely responsible for our own lives and then just give it everything we've got to live as best we can, without getting too bogged down in the heavy labels of "spirituality" or "finding a path," since that's really just another way of describing how a human being lives as a spiritual, mental, and physical entity...

The guy being discussed here loves music, so honestly, let him lose himself in it! Let him find whatever else makes him feel fulfilled and happy, because that's the only way he'll truly heal himself and eventually start putting out those positive vibes toward everyone else.
Think locally, act globally! 😉

👍
It was staring me right in the face, and I completely missed it.

Anthony Perez9 said:Get him professional help immediately. If he refuses, you need to distance yourself before his darkness starts pulling you under too. Try hitting him with pure optimism and laughter to shock the system, but honestly? He might just run away from you because he’s addicted to his own misery. He loves her too much... and now he's trapped in that loop. There are just as many reasons to be a pessimist as there are to be an optimist. Just choose life.

Exactly.

bluemason3 said:Would you turn down a gastroenterologist for diabetes, a cast for a broken bone, glasses for vision issues, or wound care after an amputation?

There isn't really a fundamental difference when it comes to psychiatry and medication.

If anything, the issue is that at our current stage of development, diagnosing neurotransmitter imbalances is incredibly difficult. For instance, the only way I know to actually measure serotonin levels—which is used in some research settings—is through spinal fluid sampling. That’s far too invasive and impractical for routine diagnosis.
As a result, most treatments currently rely on symptomatic assessment followed by trial and error. This leaves a lot of room for mistakes and long waiting periods before finding the right approach.

Still, there isn't a better alternative, and principle-wise, I don't see a specific problem here. If there is one, I’d say it’s the irrational resistance and the unfounded attempt to separate psychological processes from physiological ones.

If someone refuses treatment, I don't see how listening to people rambling on a forum—people who don't know them and lack any expertise to offer advice—is going to help. Just deal with it.
To be clear, I'm not implying that pharmacotherapy is the absolute best solution in this specific case, but none of us here can actually know or assess that. A decent psychiatrist will send a patient through a battery of tests—medical ones to rule out organic causes like thyroid issues, plus psychological testing and interviews—and then they'll likely adjust the medication over time. I don't see how laypeople on a forum can speculate about what's happening based on just a few sentences in an opening post.

One could potentially take a roundabout route by seeing a psychiatrist who also practices psychotherapy in a direction that aligns with their worldview (there are quite a few who flirt with philosophy and spirituality, and much of New Age spirituality actually stems from humanistic schools of psychotherapy)), and who won't jump straight to medication (which is sometimes prescribed unnecessarily), to suggest therapy instead. However, you won't get that covered by Medicare.

Right... I suppose a shattered soul resulting from the sheer weight of realization is just like a broken arm—you just set it, put it in a cast, and wait about two months for it to mend.

Parsifal gave the author the single best piece of advice possible.

Look, I don't think your friend is necessarily wrong, but if this common-sense approach from Parsifal isn't working—and frankly, I doubt it can—then she needs actual psychiatric medication.

Take a friend of mine, for example; he isn't suicidal, he’s actually quite functional in his day-to-day survival, yet he tells me he is simply "waiting for death." That is truly how he lives. His main struggle was insomnia, so his psychiatrist prescribed Seroquel. It certainly helped him pass the time while waiting for the end.

It’s a terrible situation, the fact that your friend even has a family to deal with.

ruggedraven36 said:Man, I'm picturing it something like this

It wouldn't quite qualify as paradise, but it would certainly be 🙂

coastalcanyon said:Imagine a whole new world, three times the size of ours, packed with rainforests, crystal-clear rivers, and deep lakes under a blue sky where an eagle screams way up high.

Nice touch, man. 👍

https://www.google.com/search?q=heav...hrome&ie=UTF-8

Heaven
Heaven is a place
A place where nothing
Nothing ever happens
Heaven
Heaven is a place
A place where nothing
Nothing ever happens

No way, no way, no way...

It’s much like the logic found in Monty Python's Life of Brian

Personally, I find myself longing for nonexistence—that state before birth. Everything eternal, save for this current mess, feels utterly dreadful.

Mexican business ☕
It’s honestly exhausting how they always seem to have a massive budget set aside for such absolute nonsense.

cosmicdriver42 said:I’m not a fan of your husband either. It’s pretty obvious the issue lies with him, not you. Stop taking the blame for his mess...

Actually, I disagree. I was reading through another thread by Ronald Edwards5, and it seems her mother is a classic toxic parent; between her and her husband, she’s just absorbing endless abuse because she can't seem to break free from her mother's constant manipulation.

Ronald Edwards5, being alone has its own set of challenges, certainly. I can't quite pin down the exact psychological machinery at play here, but it looks to me like your mother really did a number on you, and that's the root of it all.

Gary Myers said:I started this job at the beginning of the year. It’s not high-stress, and I could see myself sticking with it long-term since it's actually somewhat interesting. The downside is that I'm officially classified as having just a high school diploma, so my pay reflects that, even though I have a college degree.

The issue is my cubicle mate. Ever since I joined, the vibe in our workspace has been "heavy"—if I can even find a better word for it. When I first started, she wouldn't even talk to me for the first couple of weeks. She’d only speak up when we needed to coordinate tasks. She told me straight up that I was the fourth new hire in a single month and she just didn't have the patience left for anyone else.

In the months since, it's been a cycle. One minute she's taking her frustrations out on me, the next she's venting at a few other people. It's hard to listen to, especially because she calls them names—not to their faces, obviously, but once they leave the room or hang up the phone. She's constantly criticizing. Because of all this, the atmosphere in our office has never felt relaxed.

During the "quiet" phases—when she's directing her anger toward others instead of me—we occasionally chat, but even then, you can feel the tension. We never actually laugh together.

She mentioned once that she's open to new ideas, but I get the feeling she actually hates it when someone suggests one. Once, she shut down an idea I had, calling it useless. I dropped it. Then, a while later, she brought up the exact same idea herself, acting like it was some brilliant concept and wondering why I hadn't thought of it.

I’m almost never included in conversations with the staff members she actually gets along with. When they come into our room, they’ll duck into another office to whisper or just close the door. And if I try to strike up a casual conversation with them, she’ll often cut me off, even though she wasn't even acknowledging my existence two hours prior.
Mostly, she only talks to them when she's gossiping about people she doesn't like.

Day by day, I'm finding it harder and harder to show up to work. I'm stuck...

It’s actually quite telling—if you think about it, she’s managed to drive three people out the door in just thirty days.

Your only real option is to show some backbone, even if being confrontational isn't exactly your natural way of operating. When she starts one of her outbursts, you need to raise your voice just enough to let her know that her behavior is completely unacceptable.

And when the office gossip starts swirling, you should make it clear that you're there to do a job, not to participate in some high school drama circle.

Basically, you have to be willing to ruffle some feathers...

But honestly, even then, things probably won't improve much. Spending eight hours a day in the presence of someone that toxic is an exhausting ordeal, whether you're at the office or anywhere else.

What you’ve described sounds absolutely exhausting. Is this woman actually your direct supervisor, or does she just hold sway because she’s being shielded by someone higher up the ladder? I'm wondering if there's any realistic path for you to request a transfer to a different department.

In my experience, the most practical move would be to start hunting for a new role elsewhere while you're still managing this current mess.

Pure garbage. 👍

Is he really committed to being an absolute idiot?
Not a chance!

Christian Wells3 said:Hey, hope this PDF works okay.

If not, feel free to move it.

My question is: How can I be a good person without getting walked all over? People have taken advantage of my kindness and naivety way too many times.

The last time it happened was just a few months ago.

I was living in a small rental apartment. There was this older janitor in the building (he had some special needs). He was a great guy, seriously, he always helped me out, wasn't making much money, and lived in this run-down little shack. Anyway, I suddenly had a death in the family and ended up moving into a much bigger place. Since the old place was furnished, I told my former landlord he could give my stuff (TV, fridge, bed) to the janitor.

A few days ago, I called my old landlord because a coworker needed a place to crash for a couple of nights. Not only did he charge her an insane amount ( $333 for just 3 days, when I used to pay $200 plus utilities), but he actually sold all my stuff and didn't give a single thing to the janitor...

There have been plenty of other times where I've been used and ripped off.

What I want to know is, how do you carry yourself in life so things like this don't happen? I'm the type of person who would give someone the shirt off my back to help them through a hard time, but I almost always end up getting played.

Sent from my Huawei P30 using Reddit

ironrider11 As stated by:
Perhaps it could be done with a touch more personal investment—without necessarily having to pour your entire soul into it. Perhaps if I had reached out to that "caretaker" directly—maybe even taken some personal initiative regarding the relocation of my own belongings—we might have actually seen the outcome I was looking for. There is a certain kind of misguided "goodness" in paying someone to step in, only to have them claim they’ll spend their time volunteering elsewhere, only for it to turn out later that they never performed the paid work at all. It says quite a bit about a person's character when they constantly play the martyr or act like a saint just to mask a lack of integrity. It’s a grim way to run a world.

I've scanned through this entire thread, but it looks like you already received a solid answer earlier in this specific post.

It’s a brutal reality, and frankly, one of the hardest things we ever have to master: learning how to actually set boundaries.

And don't go walking around assuming that everyone possesses your level of integrity and kindness.

Carl Rivera43 said:Is it actually possible to just... wipe away all that bitterness and those cold, lingering grudges from your mind?

I’m mostly wondering if anyone out there has actually pulled it off. Because, honestly, theoretically speaking, wouldn't that be the dream? Imagine avoiding all those pointless arguments and just holding onto some much-needed peace and quiet.

Do you think letting go of that resentment would be a solid step toward finding true forgiveness? And maybe even help clear out the mental clutter in my own head?

It certainly would be.

I haven't quite mastered it myself, mostly because the daily injustices of the world are impossible for me to ignore.

What helps me get through is a bit of mantra work: "Nevermind, never ever mind."

Then there’s the breathing and counting method:
One—inhale.
Two—exhale.

Forgive me, but I simply don't have the mental stamina to wade through this entire thread. Does anyone actually know how much the local utility company is demanding to fix the situation—specifically regarding moving the gas meter?
It’s a bit of a tangent, I realize, but it grates on my nerves that they haven't replaced my meter after ten years, which should be standard procedure by now; I'm seriously considering sending them a formal grievance.
On top of that, I'm stuck with an ancient tankless water heater that honestly scares me, but the inspectors gave their blessing because my unit lacks sufficient head pressure, and apparently, I can't get a permit for a new one under these conditions.

Carl Rivera43 said:The real problem is I have no clue how to tell her she's totally wrong.

Don’t go chasing every single little comment, kid...
And if you find yourself getting a bit too worked up over her, well, maybe it's time to take some decisive action in that direction.

This American production is barely worth using as a poster, let alone anything else.

brighteagle39 said:Actually, I don't think dark humor is depressing at all. If anything, it does the opposite by poking fun at those heavy, bleak situations we all face. It acts as a sort of natural release valve for depression and darkness, serving as a gentle reminder that these rough patches are just an inevitable part of the human experience that we eventually have to learn to accept.

On that note, I’d suggest checking out:
All Bad Things with Cameron Diaz
Cameron Diaz in Bruges with Colin Farrell
As Good as It Gets with Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt
Basically everything by Woody Allen

You can find all of them on IMDb

I won't pretend it wasn't uncomfortable at times, but I couldn't help but laugh through the discomfort.

That's the magic of dark humor.