Say you go to Target tomorrow, and the cashier makes a mistake and gives you back less change than they should. Are you going to break her nose? Shoot her in the head? /QUOTE]
I’m sorry, but I honestly don't see how that applies to my situation at all. Why would I go out of my way to break someone's nose just because they made an honest mistake? My reaction was largely self-defense. Everyone else was just standing there, more worried about their own reputations than helping; nobody wanted to step in or pull him away from me. In that moment, I felt like I had two choices: react the way I did, or run away—hide in a bathroom stall or somewhere else—only to go home, cry, and hate myself for letting someone humiliate me in front of everyone. If I had backed down, people would have looked at me like some pushover who could be messed with anytime, while he’d be seen as someone you definitely shouldn't cross. Sure, I could sue him. But I don't have any faith in getting justice through the police or the court system. That would just drain my time, my nerves, and my money, and there’s absolutely no guarantee it would actually restore my self-respect. Anyway, thank you to everyone who reached out. To those who are "on my side" and to those criticizing me—we’re all human, we’re all different, and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I haven't posted in a while because I've been working (actually, I received a few more job offers after the whole incident happened). That creep hasn't reached out, his nose isn't broken—just a little bruised and bloody. A friend of ours who's an attorney says that since there were plenty of witnesses (or rather, clients, too), and two of them have already said they'll testify on my behalf, he doesn't stand much of a chance. I think he realizes that legal justice is a different beast entirely and knows he's playing a dangerous game. Thanks again, everyone.
Lawrence Lopez12 said:Haha, honestly, I wouldn't be able to vouch for my own reactions either if I were getting hit with that many attacks, so I’m not judging you at all. I really don't think you need to beat yourself up over it.
The only thing you take away from this is knowing it's better to just react right at the first sign of trouble instead of waiting until you're absolutely boiling over.🙂
Yeah, honestly, I used to just bottle everything up and then end up crying into my pillow. That was always my pattern. I think I just made things harder on myself. And that jerk probably thought he could actually get a rise out of me by being such a loser.
Alright, here’s the short version. About a month ago, this guy offered me a job working directly with clients. I was—and honestly, still am—desperate for the cash. Most of my colleagues, who know both me and this guy, warned me off. They told me he was a total nightmare, a shady character who demands upfront payments, and someone you should stay far away from because he’s also incredibly disrespectful toward women. Despite the warnings, I took the job, took the deposit, and did the work. Everything seemed fine at first. Then, a few days later, this jerk calls me early in the morning. I’m half-asleep and barely know where I am, but I pick up anyway, and before I can even catch my breath to ask what's going on, he starts absolutely shredding me over the phone. He wouldn't even let me get a word in edgewise. The next day, I find out the whole thing was based on some total nonsense—basically a rumor that I was "stealing" his clients for myself, which wasn't even true. But what really pissed me off wasn't even the accusation; it was the fact that he didn't give me a single second to defend myself. As if that wasn't enough, we ran into each other the following day while we were all out on the job site. He walks right up to me and starts berating me in front of everyone. I tried to walk away, but he followed me, screaming the filthiest profanities I have ever heard in my life. I finally turned around to face him, and honestly, something just snapped. I clocked him right in the nose, breaking his glasses and leaving him bleeding. Of course, everyone saw it, and I know I completely shocked them because, until that moment, I wasn't the type of person they thought I was. He might sue me, or maybe he won't. But the point of this post is this: in that exact moment, I felt amazing. I’ve never been a fighter; I’ve always been the quiet type who avoids freaks like him. But now my mom is telling me that I’m too impulsive and that I need to learn how to control myself. And I’m asking you guys: why? What would you have done if you were in my shoes? Thanks in advance for any input.
Ashley Chase83 said:This whole mess just proves my point: either you discipline your kids with an iron fist, or you cut your losses and kick them to the curb when they start turning into complete losers.
I honestly think the absolute worst-case scenario is when someone gets caught in a downward spiral and tries to snap out of it, only to have their depression hit them even harder.
I have to respectfully disagree with the idea that being alone is the most terrifying thing a person can face. Honestly, looking at how this topic keeps coming up, I feel like there’s a much deeper, more significant issue at play here: social anxiety. I know exactly what I'm talking about. About ten years ago, right after I finished my degree, I finally worked through my own struggle with social phobia. Once I got past that, being alone stopped feeling like a burden and actually started feeling like a blessing. Why a blessing? Because I was choosing solitude on my own terms. I genuinely enjoyed my own company. And because I wasn't afraid anymore, if I felt like hanging out with friends, I could just go out without that crushing sense of dread. It feels like this fear of being alone is often rooted in a lack of self-acceptance or even a bit of self-loathing. You start thinking, "Well, if I feel this way about myself, why would anyone else want to be around me?" But it’s different when you change that mindset. Start learning to love and respect yourself first. Once you do that, being alone won't feel heavy anymore, and grabbing a coffee by yourself in downtown Chicago won't feel like such a daunting task. ☕
Has anyone here actually tried Kosmodisk? (I am being completely serious right now). I started wearing mine at the exact moment I thought I was totally out of options, and honestly, it saved me. Even now, I won't sit down at my computer without it on. The pain is just gone. I used to deal with constant aches running all the way down my back—lower back, shoulders, neck... everywhere.
redjackal82 said:Joe Biden, just like everyone else has been saying... there's no way to get there without the USA.... no cravings, no clinging, just pure peace. You stop hunting for happiness in external stuff. That’s what true freedom looks like.
Otherwise, I'm always stuck in this "waiting" mode—thinking, "once I finally get this one thing, then I'll be totally happy." So you get it, but then you're still not happy because now something else is missing. It's just a never-ending loop. You never actually reach that peak happiness, and you never truly start living.
And don't even get me started on the past. All that "if only I had done this" or "if only they were more like that..." stuff. It's an endless cycle. And the worst part? You can't change any of it.
But honestly, everything I ever needed to be genuinely happy was already right there. It was inside me all along—my actual core nature—not some outside thing. Now, I'm just letting the future take care of itself and leaving the past in the rearview mirror. 👍 And I feel amazing! 😁
But look, I'm not actually talking about regret here. I'm talking about the things that were completely out of our hands—things like war, being forced to flee your home, and that deep, aching sense of homesickness that never really leaves you. Those are the heavy hitters.
bluemason3 said:You want a kid, you don't get one. You get the kind of kid you didn't expect, or a partner who isn't what you hoped for. Then your priorities shift once they actually arrive, or your finances take a hit and suddenly you can't make ends meet. Who knows... things change. Basically—don't get ahead of yourself. 🤣Though if you aren't into USA, you won't have any issues. 😁😁😁
That's exactly it 🤣. Just one small correction, though: if you follow the USA, you'll be fine.😁 Luckily, I had that specific desire surgically removed a long time ago.😁
Jerry Martinez5 said:Can you be specific about what's bothering you?
For example, I realized lately that I'm still hung up on a few exes. It’s ridiculous, really. I have a guy, and those chapters are closed. But I realized I'm still mourning the fact that those relationships didn't play out the way I wanted. It's clearly draining my energy right now.
And don't even get me started on unfulfilled plans. Sure, my life is fine. But the reality is there were important goals I missed—or more importantly, I just didn't put in the work. I'm pretty sure working toward them would have felt much more fulfilling.
It's the same for you, too: if I could surgically remove these desires, I'd probably be a lot happier. But, well, I can't. 🙂
It sounds like you're dealing with that "unhappy socialite" dilemma. She has everything, and everyone envies her. But she doesn't actually want the money; she wants to ride off into the sunset on a horse. I suppose the only way to be truly happy—or close to it—is to live according to your own desires, rather than trying to comfort yourself by pretending you're satisfied just because you meet society's standards of success. It's a tough one: figuring out what you actually want and then actually doing something about it.
You hit the nail on the head describing my situation. That constant loop of thinking about old, unfulfilled dreams is exhausting. It's more than just draining; it pulls me toward depression, even though I don't have any actual reasons to feel depressed in my current life. It feels like a curse. I had these big ambitions, I was actually on the right track to achieve them, and then life just shifted gears. My life didn't go downhill, it just went in a different direction. But the "what ifs"... they haunt me. Something will trigger a memory, or a random dream will leak out from the warehouse of my subconscious, and suddenly I'm in tears. It stirs up these awful feelings—bitterness, jealousy toward people who achieved the things I once wanted, even if they aren't necessarily happier for it. It’s so immature, acting like I have some monopoly on specific dreams, especially now that I'm 32...
Well, there you have it. If these Buddhist principles don't work for me, nothing will. 😁 I seriously need to find a way to kill off all my desires and just exist in a state of total stillness. Honestly, just coasting through life sounds a lot better than dealing with this constant frustration.😁
Does anyone else here ever catch themselves spiraling because of some unfulfilled dream from way back? I’m talking about the stuff that haunts you—maybe it was a degree you never finished, a career path you walked away from, a relationship that just didn't work out, or just some random life plan that fell apart. It’s so strange because, honestly, my life right now isn't bad at all. There isn't even any guarantee that if those things had actually happened, my life would be better today. Do you ever feel like these lingering desires are just pure frustration? Like, part of you wishes you could just turn them off so you wouldn't feel like you're missing out on something you never even had? If you don't deal with this kind of mental loop, you are truly lucky. 😁.
feralcobra92 said:I honestly don't think it's just about jealousy; I think it’s more about the fact that some people simply march to the beat of their own drum. People tend to get uncomfortable when someone stands out, and they use these kinds of nasty comments as a way to try and force everyone back into a "normal" mold. But honestly, while reading through this thread and seeing how everyone is reacting, there is one thing that keeps bothering me. If a woman decides she doesn't want kids—that is her business, plain and simple. It’s totally understandable if she deals with pressure from her neighbors or family, because they're going to have opinions. She should be the one making the call on when, or even if, she wants to start a family. What I can't wrap my head around, though, is this intense hatred toward children and the sheer aggression in these posts. Telling someone you'd rather they gave birth to a kitten than their own child is just way over the line, yet everyone else seems to jump right in to agree and joke about how cute kittens are. That aggressive, old-school, "traditionalist" attitude really rubs me the wrong way. If our mothers and grandmothers had thought that way, we wouldn't even be here today! Women actually have the power to make decisions about their own bodies now. In the past, fathers would basically marry them off, send them away to some distant town, and leave them to have twelve kids with whoever was chosen for them—half of whom probably wouldn't even survive. No one ever stopped to ask what SHE wanted or if she even felt like being a mother. So, please, just be grateful that we live in such a liberal era where you actually have the right to shape your own life, and let's stop talking nonsense about kittens and acting like children are the enemy.
Maybe I didn't phrase things perfectly in my previous posts, but when I say I don't like having kids around me, it's more specific than that. When I'm dealing with screaming, unruly kids nearby, my first instinct isn't actually toward the children—it's an immediate aversion to the parents who think that behavior is totally acceptable. You might argue, "Well, you were a kid once too!" But newsflash: I wasn't. I was the polar opposite of kids today. Even back then, compared to other kids, I was quiet and reserved. My mother would never, ever have allowed me to cause a scene, make a mess, or disrupt anyone else's peace. I was a very well-behaved child. That's why I compare kids to pets sometimes, and why I've decided I'd much rather have animals by my side. And about that mention of the "good old days" and how our grandmothers raised us with love? Look, if by some miracle I ever do have a child, I will love them more than anything in this world and live for them. But that also means—let's be real—schooling, stress, heartbreak, sleepless nights, constant sacrifices, getting sick, and just dealing with all the chaos of life. That's a huge part of my decision. I don't want to live a second life that I can't call my own. Call me selfish if you want, but I want a life lived on my terms. I want control over my own destiny.
Here’s a perfect example of what a "spiritually enlightened" and "totally evolved" woman looks like...http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worl...band-away.html