Posts by Jerry Martinez5

legi0nar said:HE’S CHARMING! That’s why he drives me crazy—there's this warmth there, but then there's this underlying darkness, an absolute chill when he looks at you like that, brrrr... And now he's reading this, probably just soaking up the fact that we're dissecting him! (He knows I started this thread because he knows it's me, legionar)
He's pretty tragic, I think...
He's 15.

Tragic, charming, smart kid. 👍

Ha, I used to practice those kinds of stares in front of the mirror until I shocked everyone I met, and I regularly had the LAPD pull me over just for ID checks 👍
and it wasn't even out of spite. I just wanted people to get the hell away from me 🙈

A bad person will never admit they're actually bad. Nah, they'll just pretend to be as wholesome as a Sunday morning in the Midwest 👎

John Cruz4 said:Oh, please. Me, evil? Not at all!
As I stated, if a person is filled with disappointment and bitterness, does that not imply they possess a certain level of malice?
And she was the one who explicitly labeled herself that way!

He claims he wants to be a vampire; he even told me he would kill his own cat. I suggested to him that if he truly hates everything—and he did state that he loathes experiencing kindness or love—then he is either a masochist for wanting to feel good, which he countered by saying he enjoys the suffering of others, or he is simply profoundly unhappy and seeking attention. He went on to tell me how he would destroy the entire world if he weren't headed straight to prison.

Precisely! He isn't looking for justification...
I intend to try and help him... That is why I associate with him; he is indeed a malicious soul.

How old is this guy? Sounds like just another sensitive, edgy emo kid to me.

urbangardener35 said:I totally agree—it wasn’t about her weight. It was more about how she bruised his ego 😁, so she went running to her "buddies" to get all puffed up about it, and then he just shut her down completely. Now she’s sitting there thinking about getting even.

Of course revenge is on her mind. But really, she just feels disappointed and played. She doesn't seem to grasp that this guy isn't her toy; he’s the one who can actually feel slighted here, not her.

I'm honestly curious if she'll even get anything out of our threads. Or will she just keep pretending she was perfect and he's the jerk who screwed her over? 🙄

I don't think he turned her down because she gained weight. It’s more likely he just rejected her after she blew him off back when he was actually head over heels for her. She didn't give a damn about his feelings then, so I guess I don't see why he'd be obligated to cater to her whims now.

Sean Doyle4 said:No, not really. If I had been the one to cut things off, maybe. Even then, he might be sad about the rejection, but not "hurt" in this sense—I never made any promises to him. He was the one promising to help, but it turns out he was only looking out for himself. He got what he wanted, decided he wasn't interested anymore, walked away from the whole situation, and washed his hands of me. It wasn't quite that blunt or callous, but that's essentially what happened. You end up feeling used and cheated.

But why do you feel used and cheated? Who actually cheated whom here?

You wrote:

- That you stepped in to help him on your own initiative when he was in trouble.
- That he was circling you, and you turned him down. While he was circling, he "offered help," but what did that even mean?

And now you want to be with him, but he won't have it.

I don't see what's unfair about that. Did you expect to be able to reject him, keep him on ice, and then call him back whenever you felt like it, only to find out that isn't how it works?

He "offered help" hoping to get something from you that you weren't willing to give. He "offered" while he was hoping to score.

If this were some lifelong friendship, I might understand. But here, I think you're just bitter and disappointed about something else entirely. Is it common for people to let you down like this? Does this pattern of feeling "used and cheated" happen to you often?

Why on earth are you the one feeling hurt? Is it because the guy fell for you and you turned him down?

I mean, I guess he's actually the one who should be hurting here. Just think about it for a second.

feralhound55 said:It’s not insomnia you're dealing with—it's just self-loathing bleeding into how you see everything else. Fix that, and the sleep issues will probably take care of themselves...

Since sleep isn't happening anyway, here's a little food for thought: God never gives anyone more than they can handle... all those hurdles in life? They're just there to build us up...

I suppose I agree. Insomnia is usually just a symptom of something deeper. You solve the root cause, the sleep follows.

If you don't deal with the actual issue, you just end up popping sleeping pills. Meanwhile, the real problem just keeps getting bigger and bigger.🙂

This would be incredible. If Dr. Denise Legacy or any decent hypnotherapist could actually help me get over this guy—who, let's be real, is married with kids and has zero chance of being with me—in maybe two to ten sessions, I’d drop my current therapist in a heartbeat to switch to her. Price doesn't even matter at this point. My doctor hasn't been able to fix this in over six months. And just like Michael Bishop8, I'm not looking for some magic overnight fix. But if hypnosis can actually handle it? Then I'm interested.

Can someone please explain what happened with Mack in Boots? That was actually my favorite picture book growing up.

Honestly, I can't even remember the price.

It’s probably a good thing they didn't push The Little Mermaid or Snow White on us eight years ago.🙂

Sandra Parker3 said:Things out of our hands are simply beyond our reach...?
Please.
You take them as they come; there's no point in making a scene over them.
Though I still wouldn't agree with being stuck in that constant state of discontent.
If you can't change something, why bother getting worked up? It’s outside your power. Being pissed off or frustrated by it doesn't solve a damn thing.
Real frustration actually comes from the things we *can* influence—the stuff we should be shaping or changing—but we choose not to.
So, ultimately, you end up being frustrated with yourself. You aren't shifting the blame onto someone else. What's the point? Every single second, you could have taken action, and right now... you aren't. That's where the frustration lives.
I had something else to say but I totally blanked.
Probably something about tolerance...

I completely agree with this.

Dissatisfaction is fine if, say, you're frustrated because your paycheck at Starbucks is too small, so you work harder or find a better job. Only in those specific cases.

But being unhappy about things we have zero control over? Well, we always have control over ourselves; we can change how we react to it. I've been unhappy with my family situation. I'm learning that I'm an adult now and there's no reason to let it get to me. Adults choose to enter relationships that suit them. Mine don't. So, I'm distancing myself.

Christian Wells6 said:I’m afraid the answer for Jerry Martinez5 is a resounding no.
I know precisely what I require, and while therapists might attempt to guide me toward an answer, I simply refuse to be swayed. 🤷

Well, you said it yourself—everyone gets what they deserve. If you're actually happy with what you've got, then sure, maybe you don't need professional help.

But personally? I'm not satisfied. That’s the difference. There is just this massive gap between what I think I want and what I actually end up doing.

Chloe Barnes8 said:I think Sandra Parker3 mentioned somewhere that I haven't actually pointed out one specific issue in this thread, and honestly, she's right... it feels more like a casual chat room at this point..

With all the endless flood of advice on how to find a partner, how to be more seductive, or tips on how to spice up your sex life—whether it's through books, magazines, websites, or even those reality TV shows—it really makes you wonder if we actually need that much guidance for everything. And if we do, would any of it even work?

I guess I’m just feeling pretty conflicted about these so-called sexual therapists..
On one hand, why not? It’s true that a lot of people are pretty much totally uneducated when it comes to intimacy..
But on the other hand, it feels like such an intense intrusion into someone's private life..

I mean, I'm sure most of you have at least caught a glimpse of shows like Sex Inc. on cable, right?
So, what's your take on sexual therapy? I'd love to hear from anyone who's actually gone through it...

Well, I think there was some news a few months back about the first group of American psychiatrists—or whatever they call them—starting training to become sex therapists. So, honestly, any real experience with this probably comes from people living abroad.

I guess it’s all connected. That’s just my opinion, though: if you have a healthy relationship with sex and your own body, you probably won't find yourself without a partner for years on end. It’s about instinct. Something has to be fundamentally broken if we can't satisfy our basic natural drives.

EDIT: Building a stable, high-quality relationship is more of an add-on. It involves meeting hundreds of other needs that are just as real, even if they aren't quite as primal as pure instinct.

Amanda Ramirez69 said:The thing is, connections rarely happen right when we're hunting for them; they usually show up when you least expect it. You have to take a step back and ask yourself: who am I actually becoming? In my experience, life tends to reflect your own character back at you. You attract what you've earned through your own growth. If you aren't a high-quality person, you won't find a high-quality partnership. My philosophy is simple: focus on self-improvement to gain some actual perspective. Once you do that, you can stop obsessing over the outcome, because things will naturally fall into place when they are meant to.

That’s exactly why I’m asking: can a therapist or psychiatrist actually help someone find a partner? Can we fix the reason we've been single for years just by changing ourselves through therapy?

But I have to wonder, if someone struggles to find a partner for a long time, could a psychologist or a psychiatrist actually fix that issue?

Christian Wells6 said:Well, that is precisely the only thing that matters. Because if it weren't, wouldn't the opposite reaction hit you just as hard?
People tend to move in herds, even if they prefer to call themselves a "social circle." Everyone belongs to one specific group, and most people spend their entire lives never stepping outside those boundaries.

For instance, in a crowd that prizes high-society etiquette and polished manners, I wouldn't last two minutes. On the other hand, in a crowd that spends its weekends listening to rowdy country music in a dive bar, I wouldn't even attempt it. Not even for a second.

What you’ve described is actually a way of determining whether someone truly belongs to your tribe or not.

By the way, I also believe it comes down to instinct. I recall a certain gentleman I was once enamored with—assuming I had any semblance of sanity at the time—with whom I wouldn't have even crossed a street. Sandra Parker3, it seems to me that this realization provides more than enough justification for being rational. It serves as a natural, built-in defense mechanism against a lifetime of sheer foolishness.

You're missing out big time, 😉

or maybe you aren't if you're constantly surrounded by dozens of interesting, exciting people. But if it’s been ages since you actually felt a spark, or haven't even been excited by a new friend, then yeah, loosening up your standards would be pretty useful.

As for... well, I wouldn't touch that furniture either. At least for now.🤷

Christian Wells6 said:I wouldn't place an ounce of trust in Theresa, truly not even a fraction. My reasoning is somewhat circular, perhaps, but I am quite certain that if any friction exists within my relationships, I am solely and exclusively the architect of my own misfortune. And if those problems persist—well, then they are simply necessary components of my existence. 🤷
After all, one must always have something to occupy the mind.

Perfect. Realizing why we actually NEED certain problems.

George Garcia9 said:Yesterday I was in such a dark place, honestly feeling suicidal 🙂 so I did a little searching... suicide.org is actually a decent site. It basically says, "go talk to someone, don't kill yourself." So, I tried talking to my mom. Her response? "Mention that one more time and I'm going to start screaming." Ugh, zero help there. To make matters worse, I felt even more 👎

I finally saw my psychiatrist after a three-month break (summer hiatus) and laid it all out: that I want to die, that my meds aren't doing anything (Lexapro, Ambien, and Sulpiride—which is just some super mild antidepressant, right?), that I have no will to live, that I scratch myself with my nails when I lose it, and how terrified I am about starting college this year because I feel no better than I did last year....

And what does she basically tell me? That I need to "get moving" and take on some responsibilities, as if I'm just LAZY and that's why I can't get anything done. She even said no medication will work until I start "working on myself." EXCUSE ME? 😕 Isn't depression a literal BRAIN disease? I AM TRYING to live normally, to be positive, and everything, but IT DOESN'T HELP!!!

So yeah. Her advice: go to college, and that my mom should probably force me to work (basically implying I'm spoiled and allowed to have zero responsibilities at 21, which is pretty much what she said), and then we'll see each other in a month if I feel like talking again.

Basically, my psychiatrist thinks I'm lazy and that things will magically fix themselves once I "snap out of it." Why don't people understand that I HAVE NO REASON TO LIVE, that my depression is way more severe than they think, and that "responsibilities," walks in the sun, healthy eating, and other fortune cookie psychology tips aren't going to help me????😠

Do I seriously have to slit my wrists or swallow a mountain of pills just so people finally realize that I am SUFFERING and need actual, BETTER help??? I feel like an idiot because nobody takes me seriously. Not even my psychiatrist, who is supposedly educated enough to recognize when someone is in deep trouble 😢

Betty Ortiz4 thanks for the advice. I'll try not to think and just live like a robot, since that's apparently my only option. Aside from suicide, obviously...

You aren't lazy; you clearly want help, but you haven't seen your psychiatrist in three months? That seems a bit odd, maybe think about that.
Based on what you wrote, though, you really need to switch psychiatrists anyway. You need to go regularly—like, psychotherapy at least once a week. You won't solve this by taking stronger meds; you solve it by facing the problem. Even the best therapy won't work if you don't have the desire to pull yourself together. Sorry.

Actually, all that stuff helps—sunlight and healthy food included. I say that as someone who lives off pastries, but luckily I actually forced myself to get moving today... and of course, I run to my therapy sessions. Because it helps immensely. But if you feel like you have to SUFFER just to prove to everyone else how TERRIBLE things are, you're just going to keep suffering. Once you decide to change, once you realize you don't want to live like this, things will start to move. I'm sorry, but no matter how special we all think we are, the basics are the same for everyone.

It seems to me like you just want to prove to everyone around you (especially your parents) how miserable you feel right now. You're punishing yourself just to make them feel bad. Change happens when you actually want to feel better. Amen.

And I know what I'm talking about. I was in your exact position once and gained 30 pounds in a year. Back then, I wasn't smart enough to realize I should go to therapy. I finally started years later, after I had already sorted out most of my life, determined to fix things so I could feel okay in my own skin. That's why therapy worked so well for me, and I didn't even need the pills.

The choice is yours. 🙂

Why do you even care about everyone else? What kind of man do you actually want to be? I guess we'll see if you can manage it.

jadepilot42 said:Does anyone know where Dr. Roman Dmitrovic from St. Jude’s is working these days? She’s incredible, specializes in infertility. I saw her about two years ago, then she moved to the States, came back, and now I have no clue where she ended up!!

She’s doing IVF work now over on 14th Street, Voćarska 14, phone is 4678600. Apparently, after she got back from America, they decided there wasn't enough room for her at St. Jude’s anymore.

roschyta said:I’m only posting this because I find this whole transformation fascinating. That sudden mental shift that just happens. Honestly, it scares me a bit—thinking I might just snap again one day..

Don't be afraid. You won't "snap," because that version of you is still part of who you are. Maybe things will shift again, just like they did for me. You might suddenly realize you're hanging out with the wrong crowd, or find yourself feeling isolated for a while until you meet new people or find a new way to get out there. Or maybe you'll just lose interest in modeling... until something else clicks. The important thing is that you actually made it out of your room, found your voice, and opened up. That’s you. Once you learn how to express yourself to the world, nobody can take that away from you.